The Life After

6/25/06

Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha or the characters of Inuyasha. I do not own Naraku, Inutaisho, Inuyasha, Sesshoumaru, Jakken, Rin, or Ah-Un. Rumiko Takahashi is the wonderful creator and owner of said characters, manga, and show. I do not make money off of her characters or this story. This Disclaimer applies to this and all following chapters.

Author's Note: I wrote this chapter a little faster than I would have liked, so I didn't put as much thought into it as the last one. I hope it turned out ok. I was just too excited about finishing it and posting it. Well, either way, here it is. In all its randomness. Not too much was accomplished, but I think a lot happened. I'm not sure what's up with Sesshoumaru right now. I think he's facing inner tormoil. He wants to appologize to Rin, but he also doesn't want to be the one who was wrong. That's why he keeps bouncing back and forth from longing from her to wanting her to be far away. It's because he doesn't know what he wants. Let me know if I was right about not putting enough effort into this chapter. Enjoy!

Thanks: Thanks so much for all these reviews! I love responses! ^.^ Thank you music for the masses for liking chapter 8! (I quite like it myself...boy, I'm smug, now, aren't I?) To animegirl007 I'll try to keep updating quickly. I can't seem to find enough hours in the day, atleast not on my days off from work. lol. You were right about Rin having difficulty handling all the pressure Sesshoumaru has put on her. I wonder if anyone will be able to guess what she's going to do next? There's kind of a big hint. Sorceressofthenight WOW! What a brilliant idea! That would be REALLY awkward if she had a pup....especially after what happens in the chapter after this. ^.^ Thanks so much for the help! I'm really glad you didn't see the last chapter coming, because I didn't either! I had NO CLUE I was gonna write something so random. I'll shut up now: ENJOY!

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Sesshoumaru paced back and forth in his room. He had pulled on his kimono and also his armor. He no longer felt safe. Why had Rin argued with him? If he had killed that worthless maid then they would not be in this mess. She had ruined everything; ruined him! Did she hate him that much that she wanted to destroy everything his father had worked for? “I am no better than he was, losing everything for a useless human.” Instantly he regretted having called Rin useless, but he would not take it back. She had destroyed him! And he couldn't stop the ache in his heart that threatened to overwhelm him. How could he forgive her when he felt so awful…or was he only mad at himself? He was not used to all these emotions, and he loathed her for opening his heart to such weakness. He was soft, just as all his subject would soon think. He was broken and empty. “Oh, my precious Rin! How could you do this to me? I, Lord Sesshoumaru, am nothing.” He fell to his sheets, crying for the first time in his life. All he wanted was to die, so that he would never have to feel anything again.


Rin had finally crawled herself down the stairs and into her own room. Once there, she had buried herself in the sheet from his bed. She never put on clothes, mostly because the only thing she wanted to wear was still in her lord's room. She couldn't get the word lord out of her head; he was lord, always lord, never Sesshoumaru. She would never say or think that name again. Only lord. Her lord was upstairs. Her lord was angry with her. She had demolished everything. She clung to the sheets, praying for them to turn into her lord…but they did not. She couldn't move. She couldn't breathe. Her heart was slowly shattering. All she wanted was to die, so that she would never have to feel anything again.


For the next week, neither Rin nor Sesshoumaru left their rooms. The tale of them had spread like wildfire, though Jakken had kept his promise and not spoken a word to anyone, save Ah-Un. Ah-Un certainly would not be telling anyone. It was the maid that had whispered it to the other maids, and now of course it was also throughout his kingdom. The words, never spoken loudly, only whispered, “The great lord has gone soft. He beds with a human. He loves her.” The maids in the castle no longer spoke of it, though it was something they thought about constantly. Especially since the entire week had gone by without sight or sound of their lord or their lady. They were less worried of him. He was a demon, and could last ages without food or water…but Lady Rin? How could she possibly be alive after all this time? Several of the maids quickly gathered together as much food and drink as they could carry, then they hurried to her room. They knocked and knocked, finally barging in. “Lady Rin, please! You must eat something! Or at least just have a sip of water!” they pleaded. She did not move; she only clung to those sheets that held his scent so strongly.

On and on through the day, they stayed by her side, pleading helplessly. When they were about to give up, Jakken knocked on the door. “Rin?” he cleared his throat, “Rin, someone is here to see you.” Rin sat up straight in bed, not caring that the sheet fell away from her shoulders. Jakken was startled, but turned politely away. He waved his hand out the door. Rin held her breath, wondering if it could possibly be her lord. However, it was two heads that wove their way through the doorway. Rin's heart felt the tiniest bit lighter at the friendly sight. Jakken had gone through a lot of trouble to fit Ah-Un into the castle and up the stairs. In each of the dragon's heads, a bouquet of flowers was held.

“Thank you, Master Jakken,” she whimpered.

“Please eat something, Rin,” he took the flowers from Ah-Un and walked over to her bed, making sure not to face her in such an exposed state. He placed the flowers in her hand, his strange green fingers strangely smooth for their appearance.

“Yes, Master Jakken,” she sighed, finally taking a cup from one of the maids. As soon as the water passed her lips, she gulped at it hungrily. She hadn't realized how famished she was until then. As she finished the cup, she quickly traded it for a loaf of bread.

Jakken sighed, looking over at Ah-Un in the doorway, “I am taking Ah-Un back to the pasture. If you would like, you can go pick flowers with him once you have eaten.”

She nodded at him, though of course he didn't see it.

Jakken walked away and picked up Ah-Un's reigns, “And, Rin?” he said pausing, “I am sorry for what happened.”

“It is not your fault, Master Jakken. It is only mine. The Lord reacted as he should have. I am useless to him.”

“You are not useless to me,” Jakken said and left before she had time to realize what he had said. She and Jakken had not always got along the best, but she had always cared for him. Even though they often argued, he was still a very dear friend. She had never noticed that he returned the feelings before. She stared after him for a moment, before tearing at her food again.


After returning Ah-Un to his pasture, Jakken stood outside Lord Sesshoumaru's door. He gulped, then slowly knocked. There was no answer. He knocked again. Still nothing. Finally Jakken opened the door, “My lord, you must come out of your room. It has been a week. You will never quell the rumors if you refuse to face your subjects.”

“Who cares,” a hollow voice came muffled from the pillows, “It is over. Everything is over. Nothing matters.”

“M'lord…”

“Go away,” Sesshoumaru sighed, his face still buried in the pillows, “I do not want to live.”

“But you must, m'lord! You must tend to your subjects! This can be fixed! You just have to talk to them. Perhaps some of the demons will think less of you, but all of your subjects, demon or human, will think more of you now. They will know that you do care about them, and you do wish to be a good ruler. If you face them, they will support you in this rough time,” Jakken had moved dangerously close to the bed, showing his own faith in the taiyokai.

Sesshoumaru turned his head just enough to see Jakken inches from him, “I should have killed you,” he said, without any ounce of threat in his voice, “before…her.”

“And that is exactly why they will support you. They will no longer have to fear you, so that leaves nothing but reverence. You must trust them, if you wish them to trust you.”

“Kill me, Jakken,” he buried his face back in the pillows, “I am unworthy of life.”

“No, m'lord. I will do no such thing…nor am I capable of it,” Jakken chuckled at such an absurd thought, then sighed, “Come and face your subjects.”

“Very well,” he said after a minute, “You are coming with me. Meet me in front of the castle in five minutes.”

“Yes, m'lord. Very good,” Jakken bowed. For the first time since he had begun to follow Sesshoumaru, he felt like he had served his lord well.


Sesshoumaru appeared outside of the castle at the exact time as he had said. He looked proud and strong with his armor back in place, and the sheets on his bed no longer engulfing him. The only difference was in his eyes, which no longer looked emotionless. His eyes held a great sadness that could break a person's heart just by looking at them. Jakken looked up at his lord admiringly, as a cloud appeared beneath them. Instantly they floated above the forest and disappeared in the distance.


Rin had finished her food, but still had not redressed. Now she stood as Jakken had, except that the blanket was draped around her naked form. Slowly she slid the door open, holding her breath. She did not know what she could possibly say to him to make him forgive her. She did not even know where to begin, but she would try. Just as she opened her mouth to explain herself, the empty bed that stood so coldly caught her eye. “My lord,” she whimpered. He had abandoned her. He had left her there to die. Perhaps he had wanted her to die. How could she beg his forgiveness if he was not even there? A deep anger welled up in her heart. She threw his blanket on the floor and ripped her kimono up from it. She dressed quickly, causing the sakura blossom which had held so perfectly in her hair for so long to fall to the floor. She could not stay in that castle any longer. Not if he hated her so. She would have to leave. Rin rushed down the stairs and out to the pasture. She bowed to Ah-Un asking him if he would please give her a ride somewhere far away. Perhaps somewhere north. Ah-Un lowed and bowed his heads in return. She climbed up on his back, and he took off. A tear slid down her cheek as the castle faded away. No matter how cruel he had been to her, she would miss him. “My lord,” she whispered, reaching up to touch the blossom in her hair. But it was not there.


The next day Jakken and Sesshoumaru returned. The taiyokai had great luck in dealing with his subjects. All of them readily forgave him, and it seemed that the few who had doubted him had been crushed into agreement by all of those who supported him. A few demons chanced to take him on, but all of them died swift, though painful, deaths. Now he was ready. He would face Rin. Sesshoumaru ascended to his room, in a rush. He would bring her kimono back to her. It seemed stupid to use it as an apology gift twice, but it was all he had. However, he reached his room to find the kimono gone and his blanket back on the floor. He bent down and noticed a slightly bent flower lying there. It was sakura. Quickly he grabbed it and raced to Rin's room. It stood empty and cold. She hated him so much that she had left him. He had to find her, but he had no idea where to start looking. Did he even deserve to have her back? He reappeared in every corner of the castle. Even in Ah-Un's meadow. He didn't notice that the dragon was missing. All he knew was that his sweet Rin was not there.