Innocent Beginnings

Disclaimer: InuYasha and Co. © Rumiko Takahashi

Author Note: Review! Reviews make me happy ^_^

Maggz

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Innocent Beginnings

Chapter 5: Discoveries…

I suppose those first few weeks went by quickly because I was living a dream. I mean, at times it seemed to be dragging… those weeks when Sesshomaru was out of town for stretches at a time… those times when he wasn’t able to call until two or three days had passed… but when I look back on it now… it really DID fly by.

Sesshomaru had been there for me, just as he’d promised. Actually, we’d been there for each other. True to his word, he DID call me up sometimes just to chat, not saying anything in particular… just wanting to touch base, he said. But I knew loneliness well enough myself to know what it sounded like on the telephone… miles and miles apart. He hadn’t lied to me, he got lonely too.

He’d buy me gifts at every single place he had traveled to, send me pictures and emails by the hundreds when he was away. But nothing was as good as the times we had when he came back to me… back into my life so that I could LOOK at him, laugh with him, talk to him and touch him.

I was in love with Sesshomaru Hara… the REAL Sesshomaru Hara and it didn’t really HIT me until one day while he was visiting me. It wasn’t lightning bolts and fireworks. It wasn’t anything out of the ordinary or peculiar. It wasn’t any ONE thing he said or did. It was a combination of many things that struck me right between the eyes as he stuffed a chip in my mouth, laughing at me because I couldn’t seem to keep up with him.

Oh, I’d ‘loved’ Sesshomaru for maybe a year or so, but there was a difference, a HUGE difference, in the way I’d felt THEN and the way I felt NOW. It wasn’t overpowering or hard to accept. It didn’t make me blush, become speechless or even cry. It didn’t push me to cling to him or demand all of his attention.

It was based on simple trust, care, respect and honesty. And I loved him with every fiber of my being. I KNEW what he’d think if I told him, I realized he treated me with deference due to our ages. It seemed as if I was his little sister or his niece and I couldn’t fault him for that no matter how badly I wanted to. So I kept my feelings to myself, for the time being anyway.

Love.

Plain, pure and simple but the honest to God’s truth. I was in love with him.

“What the hell are you dreaming of, Rin?”, he chuckled as he bit into his chili dog. He’d smuggled food up into my room since his third visit, which was really nothing new as he was ALWAYS bending the rules at some point, somehow! I found it sweet and funny, he made me laugh.

“Nothing…”, I said, dipping a single chip into a shared puddle of ketchup. I was very proud of the progress I’d made building strength in my hands and the control I’d mastered over them… my legs however were a bit of a different story.

“What is it? You don’t like chili?”, Sesshomaru frowned, for I hadn’t touched my hotdog.

“No, I like chili. I just eat more slowly than YOU do.”, I said, smiling up at him.

“That’s true, but you NEED to eat it or I’m gonna steal it from you!”, he grinned, leaning across our top secret room picnic to press one of his sweet kisses to my cheek.

“What was THAT for?”, I laughed when he settled back opposite me.

“I just felt like it.”, he said offhandedly. God knew he was beautiful… stunning to look at. I looked into his eyes then and THAT was when it struck me full force and everything else just kind of took a back seat, fell away from me. I loved him.

“What is THAT look?”, he asked, choking on a chip.

“What look?”, I laughed, leaning over to slap him a good one on the back.

“OUCH, Rin! Do you have to beat the hell out of ME?

Gentle, Rin… nice and slow…”, he said amid coughing bouts. I grinned, it was nice to be able to pound him sometimes. He was a virtual slave driver when he worked on my physical therapy with me.

“Sorry, Sesshomaru.”, I laughed, picking up my chili dog to take a healthy bite. I sighed, it was pure heaven. No way was he getting his paws on THIS. He took a sip of his Sprite and watched me eat, eyes narrowed.

“I don’t like anybody looking at me when I eat, I suppose that doesn’t matter to you, right?” I grinned.

“Right”

“It’ makes me nervous.”, Ituretured

“No need to be nervous”

“What are you thinking about?”, I asked, picking up my own Cherry Coke to take a sip. He’d never once forgotten that Cherry Coke was my favorite soda.

“Your legs.”, he commented.

Now any other time, any other place… THIS might’ve been exactly what I’d wanted to hear from Sesshomaru Hara… but not HERE and NOT like this and NOT when he had THE LOOK.

Let me explain THE LOOK. Narrowed eyes glued to me, pursed lips or maybe a gentle gnawing at a fingernail… I hate it because I know I’m in trouble when he gets it…

I frowned, laying down my chili dog and picking up a chip. I did NOT want to get him started on my physical therapy concerning my legs. Just today we’d spent over an hour and a half on leg exercises alone and I could ‘feel the burn’, as they say. It wasn’t a joyful, ecstatic feeling.

“Yura says there’s a pool here. Are you aware?”, he asked, nonchalant.

“No”

“I was speaking to her about putting you into the pool for some strength training concerning your legs.”, he said, filching a cfromfrom my little pile. I put my hand over them as soon as he withdrew one and sighed.

“What’s that for?”, he asked, chewing thoughtfully.

“What?”

That…?”, he said and imitated my sigh to perfection.

“I’m tired, Sesshomaru.”

“Then I should go?”, he asked.

“No, I just meant I’m too tired to even think of any more therapy, exercises… WHATEVER. Just forget I’ve got legs for the remainder of your visit, PLEASE!”, I huffed, grabbing a chip and stuffing it into my mouth.

“Kind of hard to do” he smiled, reaching over to stroke a hand up my calf. Like I said… any other place, any other time. NOW it just pissed me off. It was like he couldn’t leave well enough ALONE. If I was doing a great job in therapy, why did he have to go and talk to Yura and ask her opinion on even MORE? And I WAS doing great, she’d told me so more than once!

“You got this off the damned internet, didn‘t you?!”, I asked, crossing my arms over my chest as I frowned at him. Sometimes I cursed the fact that he had time on his hands while crisscrossing the world to dig into his laptop. It seemed I was ALWAYS getting the benefit of his searches!

Vitamins, special massages- NOT by him, mind you, different methods of strengthening my thigh and calf muscles… I had a huge ring binder FULL of his research… and he never quit. Every single time he came to visit, I held my breath, hoping against hope that he wouldn’t pull that single folded piece of paper from his back pocket, have that SAME expression on his face… the one that looked like he’d found the cure for my ‘disease”- my tired, useless legs.

“Rin!”, he frowned, a warning note in his voice, like a gentle scolding.

“No, Sesshomaru. NO! Just once do NOT try to CURE me! Just BE with me, talk to me, laugh with me.”, I said as I sob pushed it’s way out of my chest. I was fighting for control and losing.

I watched as his face fell and felt instantly worse. I KNEW he suggested things because he loved and cared about me. I knew he wanted only the best me but he drove me mad with it at times. Sometimes I just wanted us to be together and enjoy the time we had without ONCE mentioning my ‘problems”.

“Fine. I’m sorry. “, he said, gathering up the trash from our dinner and stuffing it down into the bag he’d brought it in. Rising off my bed, he pitched it over his back into the garbage bin and turned to look at me.

“I’m gonna wash my hands. Want me to roll you to the Ladies?”, he asked.

“Sure, why not?”, I replied.

He came back to me and slid hands to my waist, lifting me off the bed and down into my chair.

“Good girl. Let’s go…”, he said quietly as he wheeled me from my room and toward the restroom. He left me at the doorway and walked into the Men’s room without a backward glance. I cursed under my breath and got myself inside the restroom. Washing my hands I looked at myself in the mirror above the sink. I’d watched the changes as they’d appeared over my body but especially my face during the time since Sesshomaru had come into my life. My cheeks had lost their sharp angularity, my skin it’s shallowness. I was now pink cheeked, bright eyed and fuller faced. As each day went by, I looked more and more like the girl I’d been before… only my eyes looked different… somehow older. Sesshomaru said they looked ‘haunted and mysterious’. I didn’t know if that was good or not.

I heard a tap on the door and smiled to myself. Sesshomaru could never be called patient. EVER.

“Rin, you ok in there?”, he asked, opening the door just a crack.

“Yeah, I’m fine... on my way.”, I said as I rolled over to the door. I could see the tips of his fingers holding the door back and touched them… smiling when the door swung inward a bit more. He looked down at me as he helped me thru the doorway, amber eyes soft.

“I’m sorry, Rin. You know I never mean to PUSH you. You just have to tell me when to back off. I tend to get a bit overbearing… just ask the InuYasha and he’ll gladly tell you. I’m sorry.”

My heart twisted. I didn’t want him to be sorry…

“No, Sesshomaru… it’s me that’s sorry. I acted like a twelve year old. I SHOULD be the one on the net searching for ways to strengthen these legs. If not for you, I’d still be sitting like a stone statue in this chair by the Rec Room window. I’M sorry!”, I said, reaching for his hand.

“I want to see you walk by the end of the year, Rin. That’s only three months, you realize that, don‘t you?”, he asked as he squeezed my fingers.

“I do and I want that too, Sesshomaru. It would be the best Christmas present EVER!”, I smiled.

“Even better than what I plan to give you?”, he asked, walking behind my chair to push me with a sly grin on his gorgeous face.

“You know that’s not FAIR!”, I complained, loving every minute of it.

“Yeah, it’s fair… but MY present from YOU should be seeing you walk to me on your own two strong legs. Am I as too too much of you?”, he queried, slowing the chair as we approached the Rec room.

“No, you’re not. I told you. I was acting like a spoiled brat, Sesshomaru and I’m sorry.”, I said, closing my eyes.

“Yeah, you were.” he said, pushing me into the room. I tried to turn so that I might either get a good shot at punching him in the belly or at least throw him a mean look but he had maneuvered the chair and positioned himself in a way that I could only see the tips of hingerngers.

“What is it, Rin?”, he asked softly, a chuckle underlying his words.

“I’m a spoiled brat?”, I asked, still twisting around in my chair to get at him.

“You were, yes.”, he said. “ I mean, c’mon Rin… you SAID it, I was just agreeing with you!”

“You didn’t have to agree, Sesshomaru!”, I huffed, sitting back in my chair as he rolled me over where two kids my own age sat, facing each other over a table of cards.

“Hi Imari!”, he said, a smile warming his voice behind me.” Can we play?”

“Sure, Sesshomaru”, Imari smiled, silver braces glinting on her teeth. By now Sesshomaru was a familiar face at Sacred Heart, making sure we visited different kids every time he came to see me… asking me every time he phoned or emailed if I’d joined in at what we’d come to call ‘Social Hour’. Imari adored Sesshomaru, she didn’t even HAVE to tell me, I could just tell.

“Hi Rin!”, she smiled, blushing.

“Hi Imari. What are you playing… ROOK?”, I asked.

“No, UNO.”, she giggled. “And I’m beating the socks off Takashi!”

I turned my eyes to Takashi. He was frowning at Imari, so I supposed it was true.

“Takashi, I say you and I team up against these ladies! Put them to shame, are you with me?”, Sesshomaru asked.

Takashi smiled, his face changing in an instant. He’d kind of become Sesshomaru’s buddy, a fact that made me just a tiny bit jealous. Still, I couldn’t complain… this was part of Sesshomaru’s Rules of Therapy… get yourself busy with the crowd!

“You can have him, Takashi. I hear he sucks at UNO anyway!”, I mumbled, rolling my chair around to sit near Imari.

“Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! You are SO wrong, Rin! Just you wait!”, Sesshomaru laughed, taking the seat next to Takashi. I thought that was pretty darned sweet! It wasn’t melting me right now tho… I was still steamed at him AGREEING I’d acted like a spoiled brat.

We played five games of UNO, the fifth being a tie breaker and victorious- Imari and I beat Sesshomaru and Takashi! I was cool, calm and quiet… acting like a lady. I’d show him it was no big deal to beat the pants off him in cards. He smiled at me, reaching over to scoop my cards toward the middle of the table where he’d gathered the rest of them. Stacking them neatly, he looked at me, winking.

“Thanks for the game, Takashi my man!”, Sesshomaru said as he rose to his feet. “Next time we’ll beat them. Beginner’s luck, I say.”, he said, stretching his hands over his head. An inch or so of his tummy came into view and I shot a look at Imari… who was missing nothing.

“Sesshomaru, cover up your belly!”, I snapped, rolling backward in my chair as he, startled out of his relaxing stretch, grinned over at me.

“As you wish...”, he smirked, jerking down his t-shirt until it rode over the waist band of his jeans. Why did he have to be so darned CUTE?