Legacy of Loss

Extra Credit:



I used a scene based on the movie Kung Fu Panda in 4b. When I watched it I was actually reminded of the time Kagome mentioned a family reunion and Inuyasha pictured himself eating with Sesshoumaru, both poised to kill. I felt the need to let the gang have a hand at it instead.



Response to Reviewers:



I love you folks for reviewing, thank you!



*winks at ajj7sunhawk (I love Sacred Trees btw, one of my fave Inuyasha stories so far) and Princess Sin* Figured part of it out, eh? Knowing that may add some extra amusement to this chapter for you.



A/N - Chapter 4 is split into 3 parts because it’s so &@%#ing long. I should be able to post 4c tomorrow. I should most likely have checked it better as well. Ah well. By the way, anyone else feel oddly amused when their spell check keeps coming up with Natasha for Inuyasha?

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Legacy of Loss

Chapter 4a

Fluffy vs. The Journey There





Morning came to the small camp where Inuyasha was sleeping peacefully curled beneath a tree. His companions didn’t have the heart to wake him right away and so were letting him sleep in. Along with the fact none of them had slept well the past night. It was rather hard to ignore the howls, screams and general destruction echoing through the woods. Kagome made Jaken help with breakfast which was turning into an adventure all on its own. Sango and Miroku looked over their weapons and made repairs while Kirara took a much needed nap.



Rin had gently taken the Mokomoko from Inuyasha as he slept. She found it funny that the pelt seemed to have become rather fond of the hanyou when before it had hated him. She guessed they just needed some time to get to know one another. Plopping the soft fur down she was introduced to the most amazing thing by Shippo. He called them crayons and let her share with him. Both children busied themselves with the paper for a time. It was then that Rin had an idea.



She had been sitting humming quietly to herself before she smiled brightly and she picked up the crayons that she was sharing with Shippo. “Rin believes the Mokomoko could be more pretty.”



“Oh?” the small kitsune asked curiously.



“Yes, you can help, Shippo!” she exclaimed as she began to colour the soft fur with the pretty pink crayon.



“Really? That’s great, here, I’ll start on this end!” He promptly picked up an orange crayon and began to colour on spots.



The Mokomoko shook with profound annoyance to this cruel and unusual punishment.



Inuyasha’s nose wiggled as he blinked into wakefulness. He rubbed his eyes with his fists, always mindful of the razor sharp claws not to poke himself with them. He felt heavy and crestfallen, but at the same time slightly better after bawling his brains out last night.



He scratched his shoulder and stood up, arms stretched over his head and back muscles easing, his mouth gaping open in a yawn. Displaying his white fangs to the world. He blinked again as he rubbed his hip before squatting down on all fours. A leg rising to scratch behind a furry ear in momentary bliss.



It was a lovely day, the air crisp and cool but the welcoming sun was bright. Scents traveled well and filled his nose in this weather. His friends were all talking quietly around him, no shouting or high voices that were hard on his ears. He could feel their support and was content with their safety. Jaken seemed to be under attack by a pancake and having some sort of flailing fit.



Weird kappa.



Kagome looked like she might be close to beating him with the pan. It was nice to see her twitching at someone else for a change. It brought a certain amount of warm affection for the girl to his heart. Kagome was a good friend with her caring and strong heart. He would do anything just to make the girl who had given him such trust and a small odd group of friends just to see her happy…yeah, he was a sap.



Miroku and Sango seemed to be civil this morning. They were inspecting their weapons while they talked quietly about one of Sango’s knock-out powders. These two were an odd blessing to Inuyasha for certain. Miroku was wise and considerate, despite being a pervert. He was also much stronger and enduring than one would think. Sango was quick, strong, determined and knew her stuff. Like 101 ways to kill a demon with a giant rock and a piece of string. She was also caring and considerate as well. Yeah, Miroku was a loner because of the hole in his hand, and Sango was a trained demon killer from a village that had been wiped out. So her ties had all been cut except for her lost brother. Both humans were emotionally fucked up because of Naraku’s interference in their lives…but they were good people and Inuyasha cherished them.



Shippo…hell, the hanyou loved to bug the kid. Like a kid brother. He had a soft spot for the little brat who was always stealing his food. Someday the kit would be a force to be reckoned with once he mastered all his fox magic, he just needed some good guidance was all.



Frankly, Inuyasha was a bit worried that the kid was picking up the wrong stuff from Miroku. The kit seemed to leave as many girls as the monk did women at every town they stopped in now. It was disconcerting really. Kagome thought it was cute, but Inuyasha found it annoying.



He cast his eyes toward the kit as he shifted slightly. He would have to keep an eye on Shippo while he was with Rin. She was a pretty and innocent kid. Damn weird though. Heh, like Sesshoumaru would get attached to an ugly human he snorted. Sesshoumaru would only have the finest in everything after all.



Inuyasha furrowed his brow in confusion as he looked back at Jaken. Alright, so the kappa was the exception to that rule. Seriously, why was Jaken with Sesshoumaru? He was loud and annoying and pretty useless. It was a mystery. Inuyasha shook his head in bafflement, his ears slapping from side to side at the movement. Another question he would never be able to ask his brother. With that thought his ears drooped.



Returning his saddened gaze to the kids he did a double-take. “What are you doing?!”



Rin glanced up and beamed at him, “Good morning, Little Lord, Rin has decided that the Mokomoko is even more pretty with colours!”



“Yeah, it looks amazing now! Look at the spots and stripes! The fur is hard to draw on though. I really like the flower Rin did.” Shippo held up part of the obviously livid fur to show off his art.



Inuyasha could swear the boa was using all its self restraint not to pummel the children. Or maybe that was him. His eye and fingers twitched slightly as he ground out, “I thought it was fine before. What would Sesshoumaru think of this?” He had tried to choose his words and not upset the brats. But he was upset about this more than he should be damnit. They would make the fluffy thing smell all waxy and not like Sesshoumaru anymore. Inuyasha was still clinging to that scent as a comfort thing. It was a little bit of his brother left, way more than Inuyasha had had before really, except Sesshoumaru had been around then. Ready to fight or belittle him…but there, always there. Inuyasha needed to hang onto the scent of his brother still on the Mokomoko. “Would he have let you do that if he was still here?” He snapped and thought the answer obvious.



Rin’s smile faded and Shippo looked nervously at Inuyasha’s fist. “Rin is sorry to upset Little Lord, she just thought Lord Sesshoumaru would like it if she decorated his Mokomoko form him. Sometimes he lets Rin comb it. And he always liked the flowers Rin would give to him.” She said softly as her tearful gaze fell to Inuyasha. “I hope he comes back soon, Rin will start missing him soon.”



“He let her give him flowers?” Sango whispered.



“And he liked them?” Miroku whispered back.



“How could she tell?” Sango responded.



“I suppose because he didn’t destroy them?” Miroku offered as he made an odd face. “Sorry…I can’t seem to get the image of Lord Sesshoumaru holding flowers from my mind…I‘m not certain to find the image amusing or disturbing.”



“We just wanted to make it look nice, to remember Lord Sesshoumaru,” Shippo chirped as he put his arm around Rin to comfort her.



“Lord Sesshoumaru never let me give him flowers; he was so over-indulgent with that girl!” Jaken complained from under a pancake.



“Jaken tried to give Sesshoumaru flowers?” asked Miroku.



“There’s an image…” Sango started to laugh and Miroku joined her.



“Inuyasha,” Kagome said softly as she placed her hand lightly on his bicep. “I think it best to let Rin do as she wishes with the fluffy thing. Lord Sesshoumaru did give it to her to care for, and it’s a security blanket for her now. If she wishes to teach it tricks or make it pretty, it will help her deal with missing Sesshoumaru in her own way…eventually, she will realize he isn’t coming back, and will treasure the fluffy thing more. Do you understand what I’m trying to say?”



Inuyasha sighed tiredly, “Yeah, yeah, I get it. And no I don’t wanna talk about it.” He caught Kagome’s next question before she could ask him if he wanted to talk about his feelings about his brother’s death. He mumbled as he hoped over to crouch by the fire. “Where’s my breakfast? Jaken better not be wearin’ it.”



The kid needed the Mokomoko to deal with her grief despite the fact she still believed Sesshoumaru was coming back. She got the security blanket. What Inuyasha wanted to know was why he never got one? “Jerk,” he muttered.



“Inuyasha! Did you just call me a jerk?” Kagome growled with her hands on her hips.



“I think he did,” Shippo replied wide-eyed as he and Rin finished up their colouring for breakfast. The length of fluff coiled into a ball, trembling. Whether it was in rage or humiliation or both none could be certain.



“What?! I did not!” Inuyasha fumed. It was nice to get into a fight again. The two broke into a heated argument that lasted through the meal and into the breaking up of camp. As they fought Miroku smiled serenely at Sango.



“It looks like he is dealing well with his grief.”



“It would appear, but we should keep a close eye on him.” Sango replied.



“Indeed, I agree.” Miroku nodded. “I realize they had an odd relationship. That Sesshoumaru was planning to kill him…though I often wondered if there was more to that since he never did despite being given ample opportunity. But, it will still take Inuyasha time to cope with the loss of his only family. Even if he won’t admit it to us.”



“Especially if he won’t admit it to us Miroku. You know how he is. He insults, postures and acts cocky to cover his pain. He is extremely loyal and caring and when he is hurt he is hurt deeply. His gruff mannerisms are a way of protecting himself, a shield. He fears becoming too close in case he loses people. I believe Sesshoumaru shared that tendency with his brother. Only Sesshoumaru’s shields were his icy indifference.” Sango replied. “I’m very worried about our friend. Losing Sesshoumaru and suddenly being thrust into the role as Lord…even going to the castle he was never allowed to enter. This will be very difficult.”



Miroku sighed. “I know Sango, I am equally as worried for our friend’s emotional state, but I am also worried about what will happen to him once we reach the castle. We shall have to be extra observant. There is no telling in what manner the demons shall try to take his and our lives.”



“Do you think we’re in over our heads, monk?” she asked quietly.



“Perhaps, but we have managed everything that Naraku and the world have thrown our way so far. We will merely have to handle this situation the best we can as well. Should it go badly…we will grab Inuyasha and run.” He smiled.



Sango rolled her eyes, “Unlikely.”



From its position over Rin’s shoulders, the Mokomoko listened curiously.



The strange group continued South-Westward following Jaken’s lead. Throughout the morning and into the afternoon they kept their pace casual. Talking and arguing as the situation called for. As the day continued the temperature dropped uncomfortably. Extra layers of clothing were donned. Shippo and Rin were wrapped in Kagome’s sleeping bag on Ah and Un. While Sango and Miroku both wore blankets walking on either side of Kirara. Jaken was wearing Kagome’s jacket.



The miko was freezing and had wrapped herself in the mokomoko due to Rin’s insistence. She had been stepping and tripping on the wretched thing ever since she was handed it. This was much to Inuyasha’s annoyance. Now that she was riding her bike she found it to be even more of a hindrance. But it was comfie.



It was surprisingly warm and Kagome agreed the thing was alive. The thing had a presence to it. Not overly obvious unless you were really close to the thing, but it was there subtly and potently inside the fur. Like its aura was muffled by the covering. It also moved on its own accord sometimes and she wasn’t entirely certain about its intentions. On more than one occasion she had to pull it loose from her neck where it seemed to be getting a little too tight. It also seemed to want to slide away from her so she had to keep re-wrapping it around her.



She couldn’t quite understand it. At first she wondered if it was because the thing belonged to Sesshoumaru so long that it had taken a bit of him with it. If that was the case she could understand its dislike of humans. But, she had seen the thing curled snugly around Inuyasha as though it were guarding him as he slept that morning. If it was Sesshoumaru’s influence surely it would have been less amicable toward Inuyasha since Sesshoumaru hated him so much.



Maybe the mokomoko was just partial to dog-demons? That would make sense if it was acclimatized to them.



What Kagome couldn’t figure out was what the fluffy thing was, or was for. She had sworn it was part of Sesshoumaru’s body. Especially since she had seen him transform into the terrifying dog demon. The fur had extended along his body and become part of the ruff around his neck and arched toward his tail.



But, Sesshoumaru was most definitely dead now. There was no way any part of him could survive, so the mokomoko was something else. Was it some kind of armour maybe? She wasn’t sure.



She was flying through the air over her handlebars with a scream.



A blur of red and white and she was in Inuyasha’s strong arms, a second later he had turned his back and crouched over her as the bike followed her fall and crashed into his back. “That hurt damnit, why do you have to always bring that thing? Why can’t you just ride on my back?”



“Because sometimes I need a break from your presence.” Kagome snapped back. She could have sworn the mokomoko was growling at her from where it had fallen. “And thanks for catching me…are you alright?” she asked in concern as he set her on her own feet.



“Yeah, just a bike in the head, I’ve had worse,” He snorted.



“What happened, Kagome?” Sango asked from up ahead.



“The fluffy thing got stuck in the spokes of the bike and jammed it up,” She responded.



“What? Is it ok?” Inuyasha blurted turning to look at the tangle of bike wheel and Mokomoko. “Gah! Kagome! You might have broken it!”



“I did not! That thing is just fine, look,” with that she wrenched the piece of fur harshly from the bike, it was smudged with chain oil and dirt; as well as, slightly crookedly bent along its length. “I’m the one it nearly broke!”



Inuyasha’s golden eyes went wide and he flailed, yanking the Mokomoko out of Kagome’s hands, “Be more careful with it, wench!” He cried out angrily as he ran his hands over the full length of the fur, looking for any tears or such.



“Inuyasha…”



The hanyou’s head shpt up and his eyes went wide, anticipating the next word and what it would bring.



“Sit!”



The resounding crash caused a small avalanche a mountain away.



The Mokomoko did not appreciate the wench’s abusive hands or the force Inuyasha had crushed it with.



The group continued on through the afternoon. There seemed to be a small settlement around a shrine up ahead. After some debate the group decided to try their luck for the night. It was dubious they would be permitted entry. Because getting Shippo and Kirara into a town was one thing, Jaken and Ah-Un was a whole other matter. To add to matters, Rin seemed nervous about spending the night surrounded by so many people as well. Plus, Inuyasha was difficult on his most compromising days. To say he could be a little unsociable was like saying the ocean was a little wet.



So it was with a great deal of surprise that they found they would be admitted to the temple for the night with open arms. Apparently, the temple took in anyone who asked without question. Demon or human.



The townsfolk were slightly less indulgent of guests though. A few sent dark looks to the hanyou and muttered about the abomination he was, and sent wary glances at the dragon and Jaken.



For the most part though, they were accepted. Dragons were a noble and often beneficial breed. Considering it traveled with a monk and a priestess, it must be a good spirit. The Fox and two-tailed Neko were just too adorable not to be good creatures. The imp was accepted as obviously being a venerable elderly being of great wisdom who must be a companion of the monk’s. As the unusual group made their way to the temple each of the members reacted to the attention of the villagers in their own manner.



Sango and Miroku walked in the front of the group. Miroku was smiling pleasantly to all those around him as he blessed those who wished it and gazed intently at everything with breasts. Sango remained quiet and dignified as usual. Kirara purring in her arms as young children ran forward to pet the Nekomata. Sango’s posture and face were friendly but her eyes were hard and unforgiving as she glared death threats at the monk each time his eyes wandered south of a woman’s face. Behind them came Jaken. Walking proudly with his head held high and refusing to look at the lowly humans around them.



Ah and Un trudged along after Jaken. They were docile and tolerant as usual. Both heads blinking curiously at the villagers who ran up to touch him. One little boy even brought Ah a handful of grass, which annoyed Un.



Kagome came next with her bike, beaming and waving to everyone who approached. She eagerly answered questions about the group and somehow managed to be oblivious to the unhappy looks the women were giving her and the slightly lusty ones the men cast to her bare legs. Shippo was near to her as he entertained two young girls with tales of how brave he was. Even doing a few flashy tricks with his fox magic that captivated their attention.



Last came Inuyasha and Rin. The little human was once again wrapped snugly in the fur while she walked close to Inuyasha’s leg. Her large eyes were roving nervously over the villager’s faces. The hanyou walked with his spine straight and his arms shoved into the opposite sleeves of his haori. Butt length white hair shifted from side to side gently as we walked. His head was tilted up and his eyes were closed as he seemingly basked aloof in the sunlight that bathed his features. Features that were calm and unconcerned except for the mad dash his ears were doing on his skull. Twitching and swivelling wildly catching the voices of the locals. His sensitive nose wiggling on occasion as he sifted through the myriad of smells in the village on alert for any danger.



From a group of huddled villagers watching from a porch a distance away from the group, Inuyasha could detect morsels of conversation. Sometimes he wishes his ears weren’t so sensitive so he could ignore that crap.



“He looks like a mutt that should be put down.”



“I think he looks adorable with those big eyes.”



“Why does a half-breed travel with them?”



“Maybe he’s their pet?”



“Pet! That must be it. They picked up the starving, worthless mongrel somewhere and tamed him. Or they took him as a charity case. The only explanation a mistake like that would be with them.”



“He’s an abomination. A filthy hanyou. Some mindless demon crossed the line and probably raped his mother. Animalistic demons and we superior humans shouldn’t breed, it goes against nature.”



“They could have been in love.”



“Then the human was crazy and the demon seduced them.”



“I know these things, seen it before. I bet the father was a mindless mongrel. Thinking with its dick and instincts it had no higher thought and no honour. The poor mother, I bet she couldn’t fight it off. Though, I’m surprised she didn’t abort the hanyou.”



“She might have been a whore and welcomed it.”



“Still, even a whore would abort such a mistake with a mindless demon.”



“Once again, Damu, they might have loved each other and wanted the child.”



“If she did, she was a strange woman.”



Inuyasha’s ears were flattened to his skull and his claws were drawing blood from where they punctured his forearms in his sleeves. He tried to ignore the fuckers and their lies. He was better than them, he would not react.



The Mokomoko on Rin was twitching and shuddering violently. He swore it was doing some weird vibrating growl thing. Inuyasha recalled that it had acted in battle to aid Sesshoumaru in the past. He vaguely wished it would lash out and strangle the bastards. Kagome wouldn’t sit him if the fluff did it. The thought almost brought a smirk to his lips. The ignorant humans weren’t worth the fight.



“We should toss him in the gorge and see if the baboon demon will eat him or hump him.”



“Or both…”



“Would a baboon eat dogs?”



Then again…Inuyasha twitched. He was about to launch himself at the humans when Rin’s voice spoke up quietly from beside him.



“Inuyasha, I think the Mokomoko is upset about something.”



“Feh. Probably as quick to defend the old man’s honour as Sesshoumaru,” he muttered.



“What did you say, Inuyasha? Do you know what’s wrong with Mokomoko? Did Rin do something wrong?” the girl asked fearfully as she pet the fluffy article.



The hanyou sighed and took a calming breath as he pried his claws from his forearms under his sleeves. He hated when people were upset. He wasn‘t a comforting sort but he tried his best. “The fluffy thing probably just doesn’t like being surrounded by humans.” He mumbled with a shrug. Honestly, he didn’t have a clue why it might be upset other than maybe it heard the comment about the old man. But he was damned if he would repeat that to the kid. Hell, it was a piece of fluff wasn’t it? Did it even care or could it even hear or sense stuff for that matter? Inuyasha shook his head. The thing was too weird. Like his brother. Probably why the bastard liked it so much, they thought alike. Keh.



“But, Little Lord, Rin is human too. Do you think it dislikes me?” The little girl asked sincerely. Her large innocent eyes were gazing up at him intensely.



“Nah, Sesshoumaru liked ya. So, I’m sure his Mokomoko would too,” he reassured her gruffly. “Besides, if it didn’t like you, it woulda already reacted, right?” He reasoned that made sense.



The small girl seemed to agree with his reasoning because her face remained thoughtful for a moment before giving him one of her trademark bright smiles and nodding, “Right!” the girl held up her hand to Inuyasha as her inquisitive eyes peered up hopefully to him from amid the layer of Fluffy. The hanyou balked slightly knowing what she wanted but hesitant to give it. He wasn’t good at the whole sentimental touchy thing considering he’d been on his own so long. Kagome always said he had a lot to learn about his feelings and crap. The kid wasn’t too bad. She was rather weird, but the decent sort. He had no idea how she’d ended up following his asshole brother around.



Now, she was alone. Like he’d been for so long. But, she still had the even weirder Jaken to deal with. Deciding that she probably could use some contact he glanced at his companions. As he did so he had a small epiphany. Everyone one of them knew loss’ clammy grip intimately. They had all suffered a great loss in their lives and yet carried on.



Even Kagome did. She had lost her dad in something called a car crash. He had no idea what that was but it sounded bad. The one time she’d talked about it with the group she’d started to cry. That had been a depressing night. Since Sango, Shippo and Miroku had started talking about how much they missed their dads too. At least they knew their fathers.



Grudgingly, Inuyasha let his arm fall limply to his side and offered his hand to the girl. She beamed and held it awkwardly in her much smaller one. They swung their arms a bit as the girl skipped beside him. He matched his pace to hers and she beamed up at him, trying to be brave and ignore all the people around them as they finished passing through the village and moved toward the temple entrance.



Suddenly Rin gasped, “Little lord, why is there blood on your arm?”



“Keh. I cut myself,” he dismissed.



“Why?”



“It was an accident. I’m used to being alone, and I don’t like having a lot of people around either, like Mokomoko,” he shrugged.



“Rin doesn’t like lots of people either, it makes her nervous.” She announced.



A white ear flicked curiously as he peered down at her with his large amber eyes. “Why is that? You seem like a bright kid. Probably had a lot of friends from where you were before my bastard of a brother met ‘ya. Why did you follow him anyway, and why the hell did he let you?” He tilted his head to the side as he regarded her. The whole group had often wondered about that. Where the girl was from, and what happened to her family. Most of all they wondered why the human hating Sesshoumaru had a human.



Rin’s cherubic features became morose as she looked up at Inuyasha. A shadow crossed her face as her voice became sad and spoke distantly, “Rin lived in a farming village with her entire family. She had grand-parents, two aunts, three uncles and two cousins. Rin lived with her parents and her big sister and her little brother. She did have a lot of friends and was very happy there. Rin was still very little when bandits came and killed everyone. They lined everyone up that they caught. They killed Rin’s father, grand-father, uncles and brother along with all the other men when they were tied up. They took all the food, and what little money we had. They even took Rin’s mother’s best necklace. It was very pretty and made of jade, Rin had always loved that necklace. It had been Rin’s grand-mother’s. The bandits did things to the women and made them cry, then killed them too, except a few they took away. Rin’s grand-mother was left for dead, and Rin was hidden under straw where her big sister told her to stay. Rin’s grand-mother carried her to the next village, but she died there, she was hurt too bad and her heart was broken.”



“Rin lived alone in the new village, by the river. She made herself a lean-to and sometimes the villagers would giver her scraps and old things like a kimono or pot they didn’t need. Rin was happy there too, though she got beat up a lot by the other children because she had no family to protect her.” Her eyes were distant as she spoke and her face pensive.



Inuyasha felt his heart clench. He could relate to this kid. He knew exactly how she must have felt being picked on and all alone in the world. He gave her small hand in his a little squeeze to let her know he understood. He also became aware of the fact Shippo and Miroku were now close by and obviously listening in. He had a feeling Sango was eavesdropping as well because her pace had slowed.



“Feh. I bet you were a lot tougher than those bullies who picked on ‘ya.” He grunted.



Rin just shrugged. “They are all dead now too. Everyone in Rin’s second village is.”



Inuyasha blinked, “Twice? How?” he asked.



“Rin found Lord Sesshoumaru injured in the forest. She saw that he needed help and wanted to because he was alone and injured like Rin often was. She tried to get him food but she was beat up by the villagers because of it. Rin kept trying to find Lord Sesshoumaru something he could eat though. He said he didn’t eat the food she brought. When Rin was looking for something to keep her lord warm the village was attacked by wolf demons and they killed everyone. Rin ran but they killed her too.” She stated matter-of-factly.



“What?!” Inuyasha yelped as his eyes went wide and he nearly tripped.



“Rin, what do you mean you were killed?” Sango asked as she appeared by their side and knelt by the girl.



Miroku and Kagome had stopped as well and were standing near by listening. They had come to stand by the temple gates. Shippo hopped into Kagome’s arms and the miko’s eyes were large and filled with emotion, “Killed?” she whispered in horror.



“Yes. The human child was killed by lowly wolves. Her throat torn. My wondrous Lord Sesshoumaru,” he sniffed. “Found the girl in the woods after I had joined him and revived her with his Tenseiga. He took her as his ward and has been allowing her the unequalled privilege of being in his presence since!”



“That was the best thing to happen to Rin, to find Lord Sesshoumaru.” She smiled happily.



Inuyasha was blinking rapidly as he stared at the little girl and still held her hand. He could understand in a way why she was so dedicated to him. Being alone all her life and treated like crap then Sesshoumaru helping her out. Maybe the first decent thing anyone did for the kid…but…Sesshoumaru? Why would he?



“That’s awful! Who would kill a child like that?!” Kagome fumed in a mixture of horror and anger. Inuyasha knew children were an easy target to both humans and a hungry youkai; he’d been hunted enough to know.



“Why would Lord Sesshoumaru resurrect a human child? Perhaps he is not as cold-hearted as we believed?” Miroku murmured as he rubbed his chin in thought.



“Keh.” That was what Inuyasha wanted to know. Why would his unfeeling bastard of a brother help this wisp of a girl? A girl who had no relation or importance to the bastard. When he never helped Inuyasha who shared his beloved father’s blood? Instead he had tried to kill him often enough, or at least maim him. But there were a few times he seemed to help…but…was he? Hadn’t he always insisted on Inuyasha’s worthlessness? His human tainted blood. Yet, here was a human child that he valued the life of and often protected from harm. An odd sense of hurt and jealousy knotted in his belly. Stupidness.



“Only my most perfect and beloved Lord knew, I was certainly surprised.” Jaken replied dismissively.



“Because he was lonely, and he loved Rin like a daughter.” The girl responded simply. The entire group just stared at her.



“Keh. Whatever kid. Sesshoumaru never loved, I don’t think he could. I also don’t think anyone was up to his almighty standards to be in his presence long enough for him to ever feel lonely. You can’t be lonely if you don’t like anyone.” He sulked.



“You are wrong, Little Lord, Lord Sesshoumaru loves a great deal. He just shows it differently, like all of us do. It also takes a while for him to let you into his heart, sometimes he doesn’t even know when you’re there. He is very protective and loyal once he cares though. He protects Rin all the time! And I know he will return to us as he promised. He cares about you too Inuyasha, and will make sure you’re taken care of.” Rin smiled cheerfully. The Mokomoko seemed to be calm, almost thoughtful if a fur could be, after its previous annoyance.



“Ha!” Inuyasha barked a strange humourless laugh. “If by take care of you mean kill! Maybe, for whatever fucked up reason, he liked you. But there’s no way he gave a damn about me! Everyone knows he hated this filthy half-breed stain on the bloodline yadda yadda. Tell me another one kid.”



“He thought about you often and came to check on you when you didn’t notice. He did care.” Rin vowed stubbornly.



“Yeah, sure. Thinking of ways to hurt me. If he cared, then why did he try to kill me all the time? Why’d he shove his hand in my stomach! Why’d he never help me, why’d he leave me all alone when mom died and not protect me? Why’d…why’d he leave me?! He hated me kid. He was an asshole!” Inuyasha yelled with agony. His bright eyes were filled with tumultuous emotions and he was gesturing wildly. The villagers had begun to stare.



“Why’d you never ask him for help? Why’d you push him away and not try to understand him? He did care for you! He made you strong by challenging you and by making you look after yourself. He didn’t abandon you, though he might have been hurt and mad at you a lot.” Rin defended fiercely.



“He…he…he hated me! He cared about you who….he hated me!” Inuyasha howled in misery. His chest felt tight and pained and the confusion and sorrow tore apart his insides. “And he did too abandon me, he’s gone!”



“He is not!” Rin shouted still holding on to her Lord’s promise to return.



“He is!”



“He’ll be back!”



“He won’t ever be back kid!” Inuyasha wailed drawing more attention if that was possible.



“Inuyasha, it’s OK,” Kagome whispered as she put her small hands on his arm to soothe him.



Miroku’s brow furrowed and he looked as though he was about to say something. Sango just shook her head slightly at the monk and both stood near to the upset hanyou.



“No, it’s not OK Kagome. How…how could he care and protect and provide for a human girl when he didn’t do shit for me? How could he hate me and care for her? How…” Inuyasha refused to come to terms with the fact that his brother may not have hated him as much as he thought. He just couldn’t handle it. “How could he get himself killed and leave us?!” he demanded angrily to no one in particular.



Kagome calmly wrapped her arms around Inuyasha’s trembling torso and hugged him tight. “I don’t know, Inuyasha.” She said quietly. Miroku placed his hand lightly on his friend’s shoulder and squeezed.



“These are questions you will come to terms with in time. Your grief is still too new to think with the proper perspective over the past. It will come.” He quietly advised.



Sango just stood silently by his side. Her quiet strength wrapped around her grieving friend. Shippo and Kirara stood near at hand too, offering their support as Sango did.



“It never makes any sense, and it always hurts. You just learn to deal with it, right?” Shippo asked sadly.



“That’s right, Shippo.” Kagome encouraged.



Ah and Un just blinked sympathetically before shuffling toward the temple’s grass.



Jaken remained silent and off to the side a bit. He was watching the group with quite bafflement. Why did they care so much about his beloved Lord? They were enemies! Eventually he sighed and felt the need to break the oppressive silence with a tidbit of real truth. “Rin was cared for and protected, but never coddled. Lord Sesshoumaru made certain she caught her own food and was capable of tending to her own needs. He wanted to make sure she could handle herself if he was not there. Though he makes sure I’m around to protect her because the girl is useless. I’m quite certain my Lord Sesshoumaru in his infinite wisdom treated you as he did for a reason more than you were a half-breed. No one got as much attention from him as you did, Lord -” his green face twitched. “Inuyasha, he never killed you. If he hated you he would have after all. If you were meaningless he would have never acknowledged your existence or allowed your paths to cross at all. He also rarely tolerated you being insulted in his presence, even though you are a worthless half-breed.”



“That’s true!” Rin chirped pleasantly, “he would become angry with anyone who called you that. He stepped on Master Jaken a lot.”



Inuyasha just stared at them as he tried to absorb this and place it with his angry, cold, insulting brother. He just was so tired. His soul and mind felt drained and he found himself leaning against Kagome with his ears drooped. “But…he was the one who insulted me the most.”



“Rin thinks he did because he wanted you to be strong like him. He would want you to be respected on your own not just because you were his Lordship’s brother. Rin believes Lord Sesshoumaru wanted to make you as strong and independent as you could be so you wouldn’t be hurt by anyone else. Demons only respect strength, Little Lord. At least that is what Master Jaken says.” She chirped.



“This is shit. He nearly killed me a few times and what about my sword?”



“Well, yes, your father’s fang should have belonged to Lord Sesshoumaru. It’s only right he have such a strong and feared weapon! It belonged to his beloved father whom he worshiped. Our late, divine Lord was also rather territorial of what was his. Of course he was angry about you getting a sword that should have been his! He felt betrayed and confused by his father no doubt. What he was thinking giving that fang to you, I will never know. You didn’t even know nor do you have any respect for Inu no Tashio.” Jaken ranted in annoyance.



“Rin believes Little Lord and Lord Sesshoumaru are both stubborn.” She scolded. “And you both have nasty tempers.”



“That’s for sure.” Muttered Shippo.



Inuyasha rubbed his face irritably in confusion. Could it be that his brother may not have hated him as much as he had thought? Was that even possible? It went against everything he knew and it didn’t make any sense. Then again, not much seemed to make sense to the hanyou these days.



“Come, my friend, let us go inside and take a bath and some food. Perhaps the temple will offer us weary travelers some entertainment?” Miroku’s soft voice soothed.



“What entertainment would be in a temple?” Kagome asked as she pictured her grand-father telling his stories.



“There might be some sacred dancers…” Miroku’s wistful voice had a suggestive edge to it.



“Miroku, I think your fantasy life is ahead of you. Unless those dancers are elderly men.” Sango muttered darkly.



“Ew.” Kagome shuddered as she once again had an image of her grand-father dancing. The mental picture was just bizarre and all kids of wrong. Gently, she reached out and linked her slim arm with Inuyasha’s lean one. She could feel the tension and confusion emitting from the poor man. She knew how upset he must be and she also understood that despite how much he insulted his brother, the daiyoukai’s death would still hurt Inuyasha terribly. The foul-mouthed man was a big softy under his wild temper after all. Of course she was worried about him. What friend wouldn’t be? She also had no idea what to expect of their reception at the demon castle or even what the castle may be like. By the few things she had caught from Miroku and Sango it was a pretty good assumption they didn’t expect a warm welcome either.



The three humans and Shippo had talked the other night while Inuyasha was in the woods screaming at himself and thinning out the forest. They were all concerned and wished to help their friend in any way that they could. For now it was decided that they would act normally and try to take his mind off his grief. There was no point in pestering him because they all knew how well he showed and shared his emotions. When Inuyasha was ready to talk, they would be there to listen.



They knew Inuyasha wasn’t up to coming to terms with the complicated and tumultuous relationship he shared with his elder half-brother right now. That through studying their actions there may have been a bond of affection between them that the hanyou had been unaware of…perhaps even the daiyoukai wasn’t aware either. Inuyasha just couldn’t deal with the revelation that perhaps his cold, uncaring brother may actually have cared in his own strange way. Dealing with those thoughts and realizing that there was no way to confront Sesshoumaru on the matter was unfair.



Right now they were working to offer him a distraction as they saw how close to either tears or an angry implosion he was. They were aware of the villagers offering the group worried looks as they stood by the temple entrance as well.



“Come on, Inuyasha, I need a bath and they’ll have food for us inside,” Kagome assured as she lightly pulled on his arm. Her brown eyes soft with feeling.



“Yeah. If you keep standing here I’ll just have to eat your share!” Shippo announced boldly.



Inuyasha blinked his large eyes at Shippo and wrinkled his nose in distaste at Miroku. “Pervert, only you would think of some shit like that. And Shippo, if you put one of your mangy little mitts on my food, I’ll pound ya!” He cracked his knuckles. He knew what they were doing and he loved them for it.



“You’ll have to catch me first!” Shippo challenged.



“Oh yeah?”



“Yeah! Ahhh! Kagome! Help!” The kit squealed as Inuyasha lunged after him.



The two ran around the group and the temple gates as Miroku thanked the temple keepers for allowing the group lodgings for the night. After a few minutes of the chase Rin began to run after Inuyasha which caused the kappa to race after her. Shrieking that she needed to behave. Shippo would dodge behind and over Kagome to use her as a human shield. The miko was not impressed by this behaviour. Kirara took refuge on Un’s head. All the while Sango watched the proceedings with an amused smirk. Children, she thought, the lot of them.



After a few well earned bumps on both Jaken and Shippo, a well placed sit command, and a proper introduction from Miroku, the group was ushered into the temple for a meal. Apparently, the temple keepers were accustomed to such behaviour or they were just as they claimed and stoically accepted all life. Despite their rowdy ways.