Brothers Alternate Ending Posted

Many thanks to all those who have paused to offer a review. Beware this chapter. Angst Alert!

Brothers

Chapter four

            “OSWARI!”

            Stunned beyond rational understanding, Inuyasha couldn’t believe his ears as he heard that
cursed word ring across the meadow. It was unreal that this, of all things, was happening to him
at this moment. But as he felt himself being inexorably forced downward to the ground by the
unseen hand of magical power, he knew he was going to have a thing or two to say to Kagome
once he got his nose out of the dirt.

            “What the fuuuu.. Awww shiiiuummpth!” He just loved the smell of moist grass and dirt
first thing in the morning. At least he didn’t have to worry about trying to think of something to
say to everyone when he first saw them. His beloved had taken care of that little problem quite
effectively by embarrassing the hell out of him. Now all he had to do worry about was the
dressing down he knew he was going to get from her once she got over the initial shock of seeing
him, and he had no doubt it was going to be good. ‘Great, just great.’

            “Inuyasha, you selfish, self-centered, arrogant, thoughtless, selfish...”

            “You already said ‘selfish’.” Inu started to sit up, gingerly brushing some of the grass off
the front of his haori. “Pick a new word.”

            “...ignorant baka...”

            “Okay, now there’s a word.”

            “...uncaring asshole...”

            “There’s another word.”

            “....stubborn sonofabit...”

            “Okay, that’s enough words. You don’t get anymore.” He reached out to grab Kagome
by the hand so he could get her attention off the insults she was heaping on his head, but instead,
she delivered one last blow to his already paining ego.

            “OSWARI, YOU MANGY MUTT! I DON’T EVER WANT TO TALK TO YOU
AGAIN!” As his shocked face rocketed toward the ground one more time, Kagome sniffed back
her tears and stomped down the path toward the village. ‘There,’ she thought with some measure
of triumph. ‘That will show him what I think of him being gone for weeks on end without so
much as a word. It serves him right. After all, he doesn’t know how much I’ve been worrying...
he doesn’t know how afraid I’ve been that something awful happened to him... he doesn’t know
that I thought he was dead and I would never see him again... he doesn’t know.... Oh Gods,
Inuyasha!’

            With a sob, Kagome turned on her heel and flew back to the struggling hanyou who was
busy trying to pick dirt and grass out of his teeth. Miroku was kneeling next to him brushing off
his clothes, and Sango was staring at Kagome like her hair had suddenly turned into a mass of
hissing snakes.

            “Kagome-sama? What the hell is the matter with you?” The outraged demon-huntress
exclaimed as she stepped between the miko and the hanyou. “Have you lost your mind? Weren’t
we just standing here trying to figure out a way to say good-bye to Inuyasha because we feared he
was dead, and now that we know he’s alive, all you can do is ‘s-i-t’ him and yell at him? Are you
insane?” Behind her, both Inuyasha and Miroku smiled when they heard her spelling out the
horrible word trying to make sure he didn’t end up on his nose again. It was a nice gesture and
Inuyasha promised himself he would thank her later.

            “I–I...” Kagome came skidding to a halt just a few feet away from the furious Sango and
found herself at a loss for words as she tried to meet the snapping brown eyes of her friend. She
was already beating herself up over what she’d done to the hanyou, and having Sango reiterate it
was not making her feel any better. “I–I’m sorry...” She finally managed to squeeze out past the
growing lump in her throat. “It’s just... I...”

            “It’s just ‘what’, Kagome?” Inuyasha stood up behind Sango and gently pushed her out
of the way. “I’d like to hear how you were all upset thinking I was dead and then had the guts to
turn on me and shove my face in the dirt. Come on, bitch. Tell me all about it.” His golden eyes
were glimmering with anger and hurt. This was not exactly the homecoming he expected and it
bothered him she had treated him the way she did. The least she could have done was pretend to
be glad to see him and say something besides ‘oswari’. Anything but that.

            Kagome lowered her eyes and tried to focus on the tie of Inu’s haori. It was impossible to
look him in the face right now as upset as he was and as guilty as she felt. How could she tell him
that the reason she ‘sat’ him was because she loved him and he had scared the life out of her just
popping up out of nowhere like that? He probably wouldn’t believe her anyway so she just stood
silently and started to chew on her bottom lip.

            Inuyasha watched while the anxiety and energy drained out of the fiesty girl he loved, and
as she became subdued and quiet, he felt the nearly uncontrollable urge to take her in his arms and
try to comfort her. She looked on the verge of tears and he wanted to pull her into the curve of
his shoulder and cradle her against his chest so he could stroke the satin of her hair and tell her
everything was okay. He wanted that so bad it was setting his teeth on edge and curling his hands
into fists, but how could be certain Sesshoumaru was right? Did she really love him as much as
his brother said she did? Inu wasn’t sure he was prepared to take that risk yet. He didn’t want to
experience that kind of pain where she was concerned.

            “Kagome,” he began and winced inside when he saw her flinch. “Are you going to say
anything, or are you just going to stand there and stare at my chest all day?” He knew it sounded
stupid and peevish, but he wasn’t going to let her get the upper hand. Not today.

            “Well, I...” Her wounded light blue eyes lifted and briefly met his fierce glare and then she
looked away. “I’m sorry, okay. Is that what you want to hear? I shouldn’t have sa... done what
I did when I first saw you. It was a mean thing to do and I don’t have a descent excuse so be mad
at me all you want. It doesn’t matter. There,” Her eyes turned marginally mutinous. “Does that
make you feel better?”

            “No, it doesn’t,’ he snarled back into her stubborn face. “I want to know ‘why’ you sa...
did what you did after not seeing me for so long. Are you that mad at me for being gone or
what? Because I sure as hell didn’t deserve either one of those things you did, and you know it.”

            “I know I know it, you arrogant hanyou, but I don’t have to give you explanation one.”
Her hands came up and plopped on her hips as her pique grew. “I’ve apologized and that’s all
you’re going to get. Deal with it.”

            “Fuck that! I want to know why you were crying when I came up. Why was the thought
of me being dead making you cry?” He leaned over and shoved his face into hers. “Was the
thought of you having to go shard hunting all by your lonesome so upsetting? Well, was it?”

            “You–you think... Gods, you are so stupid!” Kagome threw her hands up in the air and
stomped around in a circle raving. “If that is what you think I was crying about, you ignoramus,
then you don’t deserve to know anything. Geez, I can’t believe how totally dense you are,
Inuyasha. Just for that, you don’t deserve to have people who care about you, and worry about
you, and give a damn if something’s happened to your worthless hide. You don’t deserve to have
someone who sits up awake all night wondering if you’ve done something stupid again and maybe
gotten yourself killed this time, and you definitely don’t deserve someone who cares enough to
shed tears over the fact that she might never see your arrogant dog’s face again...” She broke off
what she was saying as she turned around and ran into the solid wall of his fire-rat covered chest.
“Inu...?”

            “Do you care about me that much, Kagome?” His voice was low pitched and very quiet
and when Kagome chanced a look up into his face, she gasped. Never before had she seen this
stubborn hanyou with such a look of vulnerability etched into his proud features, but as she raised
a trembling hand to touch his hair, he closed his eyes and turned into the caress a low, rumbling
growl echoing in his throat. “Do you?” He whispered, taking hold of her fragile wrist in one of
his larger hands so he could press her skin against his cheek. “Do you care?” Her stomach
lurched in response to that tender plea.

            “Oh, Inu,” She took a step closer to him and reached up with her other hand to cup the
other side of his face. “Do you want me to care that much?”

            It was do or die time, and he knew it. Either he opened himself up for the pain he knew
might rise up to consume him, or he turned his back on her and walked away never knowing the
answer. So, taking a deep breath to steady his nerves, Inuyasha decided to take the risk and see
what happened. After all, he took the risk with his brother... Kagome couldn’t be any worse than
that.

            “Hai,” he lowered his eyes and gently brought her hand to his mouth where he brushed the
barest hint of a kiss across the knuckles. “I do want you to care that much.” Her hand trembled
inside of his and he braved a small look into her face. “Do you? I mean, can you? Would you?
Even though I’m an inconsiderate mangy mutt, do you think you could... care for me?”

            The tone of hopefulness was plain and Kagome could see he was waiting for her to
answer, but her heart was in her throat and she wasn’t sure she was even going to be able to
breath, much less talk. Her mind raced in a wild circle as she struggled for the courage to tell him
what he wanted to know, but in the end, all she could do was give him a wide-eyed nod and a
shaky smile. That seemed to be enough because his beautiful amber-gold eyes filled with dancing
lights and he was pulling her hand up to place it around his neck. This, in turn, caused her to
shuffle a couple of steps closer to him until she could actually feel the heat of him coming through
her clothes.

            “It’s about time, bitch.” Was his throaty murmur as a decidedly wicked smile curled his
lips. “Now you’ve got about 3 seconds to run before I kiss you, so... make up your mind. Run...
or stay?”

            “S-stay,” She whispered as she raised up on tip-toe to meet the descending promise of his
mouth. “I-I’ve waited almost three years for you to kiss me, Inu. I’m not going anywhere.”

            “Then open your mouth, Kagome. Open your mouth and let me taste you... I’ve wanted
to for such a long time, and now that I can, I’m going to enjoy it... and so are you.” A low,
whimpering sound drifted to his ears and they twitched forward trying to catch every inflection.
He could feel the moist heat of her on his lower lip, and opening his mouth, he leaned into her and
covered her quivering lips molding them to fit the contour of his.

            A long, deep sigh of purest satisfaction left her body and she melted into his arms as they
rose to encircle her. Her free arm wrapped around his shoulders and pulled him down so she
could press herself more tightly against his chest. The silken mass of his silver-white hair was
twisted around her fingers where they lay massaging his nape, and Kagome heard and felt the
rumbling growl of pleasure as it crawled through his chest and then up his throat. She could feel
his tongue tapping against the barrier of her teeth, asking permission to come inside and she
eagerly complied by relaxing and dropping her jaw.

            The moment he felt her relax and mold into his form, Inuyasha gathered Kagome as close
to his heart as his arms would allow. The warmth of her body felt like liquid fire in his hands and
he pressed her to let him deepen the kiss. Her hands tightened in his hair as her jaw went slack,
both signs she wanted more of him as well, and so, with exquisite care, he slipped his tongue over
her teeth and began to explore the velvet softness of her mouth. Her tastes reminded him of
honeysuckle in the springtime and the fragrance of her arousal filled his nostrils with a heavy, tart
musk that started to lead his mind in more deadly directions.

            “A-hem, Inuyasha, Kagome... would you like to be alone?”

            Inu’s passion fuzzed brain barely registered the voice of the Monk and he suddenly
wondered what Miroku was doing there at all. It took two or three seconds for the hanyou to
recover some of his sense of time and place before he remembered there was a captive audience
observing this kiss. Another growl worked its way free of his chest and he pulled away from the
sweet taste of his beloved’s lips to favor the blushing Monk and his demon huntress companion
with a sour look. Leave it to that damn Monk to always find a way to ruin everything.

            “Hai!” He growled, his eyes narrowing to slits of dark, angry amber. “It would have been
nice if the two of you made yourselves scarce about five minutes ago, but seeing as how you’re
both still here...Maybe you want a few pointers on how to court your bitch, eh Monk?” He let the
offer hang in the air and watched with sardonic satisfaction as Sango’s face turned bright red and
Miroku became completely speechless.

            “I’ll take that as a ‘no’.”

            “I–well, um, yes . . . I-I m-mean no! No!” Mirouko was suddenly falling all over himself
trying to take back what he just said because he wasn’t sure if he agreed he needed pointers or if
he refused.

            “Miroku!” Sango elbowed him hard in the ribs as her blush deepened even more.

            He shrank back from the furious embarrassment in her eyes and tried to placate her with a
weak smile. “Gomen, koishii,” he sputtered hoping to get out of the sound smack he knew was
being aimed at his cheek. “I–I....”

            “If I were you, Monk, I’d be for shutting my mouth about now, don’t you think?” Inu
pulled Kagome close to his side and wrapped an arm around her slender shoulders. Another,
more sincere smile crossed his face when he felt her lean into him and wrap an arm around his
waist. “You are already on the losing end of this battle, I’d quit while you were behind, eh?”

            “I think I’d have to agree with Inuyasha, Miroku-sama.” Kagome’s face was turning back
to its normal shade of pale pink as the blush of passion and upset settled and she burrowed against
the warmth of the man next to her. Never in all her dreams and fantasies did she ever believe that
Inuyasha would care for her, but it seemed she was wrong. Somehow, somewhere along the line,
they had grown feelings for each other without the other suspecting a thing. “Can we go back to
the village now?” She asked quietly as she turned to look up at his smirking profile.

            “Sure, if that’s what you want.” He replied. “Or would you rather stay out here... alone
for a while, hmmm?”

             The devilish gleam in his opalescent eyes sent a shiver of awareness slithering up her spine
and the blush she had just gotten rid of came screaming right back. “I–I umm, no, I think I’d like
to go back to the village. Aren’t you hungry? Have you had anything to eat lately?” That was
one sure way to get the dog-boy’s mind off of more thoughts of kissing and what came with it.
Food would always get Inuyasha’s attention.

            “Weell...” He turned his nose up into the air and took a deep ‘sniff’. “Is there anything
good to eat back at Kaede-baba’s hut like say... some Ramen?” The sideways glance he gave her
brought a huge smile as well as a few giggles out of her, and she shook her head.

            “Is that all you ever think about?” She asked in a teasing voice. “Ramen? Isn’t there
anything else you’d like to eat besides that?”

            “Now that you mention it, there is.” His face was drawn into a very thoughtful line as he
turned her toward the path that led the way home.

            “What?” Her eyes were wide with curiosity as she watched him warily. “I have never
seen you act like this over anything except Ramen.”

            “That’s because I never had anything else I loved to eat as much as Ramen.”

            “Okay, so tell me what it is and I’ll start making it for you.”

            “Really?” The look on his face was half surprise and half mischief.

            “Hai, really. Now tell me what it is.” Something deep inside was trying to tell her that she
was being had, but she tried to give him the benefit of the doubt so she waited patiently for his
answer.

            “Well, if you really must know,” He leaned down so he could whisper close to her ear and
no one else would hear what he said. “It’s you.”

            “What?!” She squeaked and stumbled, tripping over her own feet.

            Laughing with good natured enjoyment, Inu caught her close and kept her from falling.
“What’s the matter, Kagome?” He asked in a teasing voice. “Did I say something wrong?”

            “N-no, you just really surprised me, that’s all.” Sexual awareness tingled along all of her
nerve endings and she was suddenly feeling very warm. “I’m not sure what you mean anyway.”

            “Hai, I think you do.”

            Kagome turned to capture the look in his glowing golden eyes and her breath hitched on a
gasp. He looked like a glorious predator just waiting to pounce on her only she couldn’t summon
even one shred of fear. Instead, her heart began to flutter wildly inside her chest and her knees
started to shake. He was right, of course, she knew exactly what he was talking about and the
thought of having his hands, mouth, and tongue touching that secret part of her was making her
feel lightheaded. It was one of her nastiest fantasies–Inuyasha licking and tonguing her until she
screamed and climaxed all over him. Then she envisioned him lapping the creamy juices of her
pleasure off his face, her thighs, and his fingers. His impassioned growls would flow over her
sensitive flesh as he rose over her and the next moment she would try to imagine what it would
feel like to have him pushing his hard, thick cock deep inside of her, but no matter how much or
how often she imagined it, Kagome really had no idea what it would feel like.

            She wanted to know.

            “Hai,” Her breath was thick with emotion as she locked gazes with the hanyou. “I know.”

            “Is it something you want, Kagome?” Inuyasha stared long and deep into those velvet
pools of blue-gray and saw the smoldering embers of a new desire waking up within them. “Is it?
Your eyes are telling me it is. What does the rest of you say?”

            “I– I... Inu,” She broke off as the heat in her cheeks became almost unbearable. “I don’t
think we should be talking about this right now.”

            “Why not?” He sounded slightly edgy and a little bit uncertain and that forced her to look
back into his face. He looked just like he sounded–worried and anxious. “Did I do something
wrong? Kagome?”

            “No, no Inu.” She shook her head and tried to think of a way to explain how she felt
when she wasn’t even sure what it was herself. “I just... we... you... I–I don’t know what you are
expecting from me. I’m nervous.”

            “Expecting of you? Keh!” He snorted and looked away as he continued to lead them up
the path. “I don’t ‘expect’ anything from you. I thought you... we... ah, fuck it.” He dropped his
arm and stuffed his hands inside the sleeves of his haori as he fell silent.

            “You thought what? Inu?” Kagome was feeling panicky because he pulled away from her
so abruptly and completely. “What did you think?”

            “Nothing, never mind. I forgot, I’m just a stupid hanyou and you would never think of me
as anything else. Gomen for thinking anything could change...”

            “OSWARI!”

            THUD! “YUUMPH!” Once more Inuyasha found himself looking at the world through a
haze of green grass blades while chocking on the dirt being stuffed up his nose.

            “KUSO!” He yelled as he struggled to his hands and knees. “What the fuck did you do
that for?”

            “Because... because.... ooooohhh!” Spinning on her foot, Kagome stomped away in a
royal huff leaving a confused and upset hanyou behind. “If you can’t figure it out, Inuyasha, then
that is your problem.”

            “Keh... women.”

 

            “I thought you said Inuyasha was going to come back, Sesshoumaru-sama.”

            “He will, Rin, we just have to be patient.”

            “But how long do we have to be pat-chent?”

            “Just a bit more.”

            “But how long is that?”

            “Rin....” Sesshoumaru voice tightened with annoyance and he favored the child with a
hard stare that rendered her silent. “He promised he would be back soon and that is all there is to
know. When that will be, I am not certain. But he is not one to break his word, so you must be
patient, small one. He will come back.”

            “Yes, Sesshoumaru-sama.” Her large brown eyes dropped and she folded her hands in her
lap. She knew he was upset with her for being such a pest, but she couldn’t help it. It was so
upsetting to her that she had missed the enigmatic hanyou’s last visit that she wanted him to come
back again right away. Jenkin told her stories about how Lord Sesshoumaru and Inuyasha had
slept in the same room, eaten at the same table, talked together, and even laughed. He said he
saw them hugging and kissing each other before the hanyou left. She still couldn’t believe that
and wanted to see if for herself.

            ‘Sesshoumaru-sama and Inuyasha... not enemies anymore? Loving each other... and
Sesshoumaru-sama missing Inuyasha?’ Rin shook her head in confusion. It was a lot for a ten
year old to swallow without having proof, and Jenkin’s word just wasn’t good enough.

            “Did you really like it when he was here, Sesshoumaru-sama? Did you really sleep in the
same bed like Jenkin says you did?”

            “Hai, Rin.” Golden eyes softened a bit as the youkai’s memory turned back. “I was very
happy to have him here. We mended many wrongs between us and much of our feelings toward
each other have changed.”

            “You don’t hate him anymore?”

            “Ne, I do not hate him anymore.” The ghost of a half smile twitched at the corner of his
mouth and he leaned over to tickle the child beneath her chin. “We seem to have found
something better to do than fight constantly.”

            “Then you won’t try to kill him anymore?”

            “Ne, little one. His life is safe with me.”

            Rin breathed a deep sigh of relief as she stood up and walked over to her guardian.
Crawling into his lap, she snuggled down into the downy softness of his tail and the drape of his
kimono. He represented home, comfort, and security to her. He was her whole world. Without
him she would die.

            “I love you, Sesshoumaru-sama,” she said and pressed her forehead into the curve of his
neck. “I’m glad you won’t be trying to kill Inuyasha anymore. Even though he tries to act mean
and growly, he’s really not.”

            “I know that, Rin-chan. He is actually quite a gentle creature beneath his gruff exterior.”

            “Hai, I think so too.”

            Sesshoumaru dropped his cheek down on top of Rin’s head as he slipped an arm around
her shoulders. “I think... I miss him.” He said is a low, quiet voice.

            “I think you do to.” She replied and wrapped her arms around his body. “He’ll be back
soon, Sesshoumaru-sama, I just know he will, and then you won’t have to miss him anymore.”

            “Perhaps,” he said as he began to absently rock back and forth. “Perhaps.” ‘My heart
misses you, brother. When will you be back? Have you gone to that village of yours and thrown
yourself at the feet of your human girl? Did you profess your undying affections and take her as
your mate? Have you forsaken me?’

            He was laying on his back trying to count the stars but his mind kept wandering to the
point he finally gave up. It was no use. He just couldn’t concentrate when his thoughts were so
far away and dwelling on such delicious memories. Kagome wasn’t talking to him, and he gave
up trying to apologize for his ineptitude and simply took the ‘oswari’s’ as they came. Now, he
simply wanted to be alone and contemplate on exactly ‘why’ he came back. At the moment, he
wasn’t sure and was already wishing he was on his way back to the Palace. Maybe coming home
was a mistake.

            ‘Back to you, Sesshou... back to where I really belong.’ Setting bolt upright, his eyes
wide as the moon shining above his head, Inu realized what his mind just said. ‘I belong at the
Palace... that is my home. That is where I want to be. I want to be with Sesshou. Gods...’ He
turned in the direction of Kaede’s hut and watched the flickering of lamplight through the open
window. He had to tell her... something. He wasn’t exactly sure what, but he had to say
something.

            “Kagome?”

            She looked up and met Inuyasha’s troubled gaze as he stepped through the door of the
hut. “What is it, Inu?” She asked as she stood up and went to him. “What’s wrong?”

            “I... I’m leaving.” He said and dropped his eyes. “I’m going back to the Palace.”

            “You–you’re what?” Her gray-blue eyes widened in shock and she stepped back. “Why
would you do that? You just got back. Didn’t you get enough blood and guts from your brother
the first time, or what?”

            “It–it wasn’t like that, Kagome. We... we didn’t fight.”

            “You didn’t fight?” Incredulity colored her voice and a look of surprise crossed her
features. “How could you have been gone so long and not been fighting? What the hell were you
doing? Playing hide-n-seek or tag-your-it or what? What haven’t you told me, Inuyasha?”

            “We... we made up, Kagome.” He said in a rush. “We aren’t enemies anymore.”

            “Not enemies? Are you insane?” She turned her back to him and walked across the
room. “I don’t know what you think happened out there, Inuyasha, but you will never be able to
trust your brother. Whatever he’s done, it’s probably just another ploy to suck you in so he can
kill you. Surely you can see that.”

            “Ne, Kagome. It is not like that. Sesshoumaru is not after my life now. Things are...
different.”

            Kagome turned around, her eyes narrowing at the iron edge she heard in the hanyou’s
voice. “Don’t be a fool, Inu.” She said. “Sesshoumaru can’t change. He’s a full-blooded Inu-youkai and to him, you’re the worst kind of abomination to his kind. You’re a half-breed. He
will never accept you.”

            “You’re wrong!” He snarled in angry defiance his fists clenched tightly at his sides. “You
weren’t there. You don’t know what happened between us, and you probably wouldn’t
understand it even if I told you. I shouldn’t have come back. I can see that now. I should have
stayed there with him... it’s where I belong. It’s my real home.”

            “You don’t mean that!” She cried as her eyes filled with tears. “You can’t mean that! You
don’t know what you’re saying...”

            “Hai! I do know what I’m saying, bitch!” The roar of his rage cut her off in mid
sentence. “Don’t think you can even begin to understand what I want or what I mean. Not now.
Not anymore. I’ve been panting after your skirt for over two years and you wait until now to tell
me you care, but it’s only going to be on your terms and when you want it. Well forget it. I
won’t stick around and play that fucking game just so you can ‘sit’ me anytime you think I
deserve it or you don’t like what I said. I’m tired of picking dirt out of my teeth, understand?
Sick and tired of it!”

            “But, Inu...” Twin trails of wetness streamed down her face as she tried to interrupt his
tirade and defend herself.

            “But what, bitch? Do you really think I want to hear anything you have to say right
now?” He waved one clawed hand viciously through the air dismissing her thoughts and
opinions. “I don’t. You are the one who has always tried to tell me I shouldn’t give up on
Sesshoumaru. That he might come around one day and we could mend our differences, and now
that we have, you tell me not to trust him. You say it’s all a ploy to sucker me so he can kill me.
You... you say all this bullshit to me after everything I’ve been through with you–for you... for
everyone?” He was breathing hard and his dark amber eyes were glittering with moisture despite
the seething fury in their depths. “How could you, Kagome? How could you do this to me? I
love you and you do this to me. I thought you would be happy that Sesshou and I finally found
our way to each other. I never dreamed you would do this... never.”

            “I–I didn’t know,” she whispered through her tears as she tried to reach for him, but he
flinched away. “I... I thought...”

            “I know what you think, but you’re wrong. You’re wrong, Kagome.”

            “Gomen, Inu.... Gomen nasai.” She grabbed at the billowing sleeve of his haori and tried
to pull him back to her, but he refused to be mollified. “Please...”

            “Ne, Kagome.” The finality of his voice gave her goosebumps as its icy tone slithered
over her skin. “I’m going back. I want to be with Sesshou. Maybe one day you will understand,
and then I can come back. Until then, I’m staying away because I can’t be here with you knowing
what you think. I can’t. I–I love my brother too much to listen to you talk about him like that.”

            “You–you love him?” Kagome’s face turned pale as shock froze the blood in her veins.

            “Hai. That I do. More than I ever dreamed possible, and I need him, Kagome. I need to
be with him. Can you understand that? It is something I need, but I want to be with him too.”

            “Dear God, Inu. Are you telling me you’re... you’re lovers? Is that what you’re saying?”

            “Hai.” He turned and boldly faced her, his jaw set in a hard line and his eyes jewel sharp
as they pinned her to the spot. “But that does not mean I do not love you with every shred of my
heart and soul and want you for my mate because I do. You are all I’ve ever wanted, Kagome.
You always will be. What exists between Sesshou and I... well, it just is. Neither of us can
explain it, but we cannot deny it either, and right now, I need to go back. I can’t be here. Not
until you can accept us for what we are and for what has grown between us. We are what we
are... nothing more, nothing less... just brothers.”

            “But Inu, brothers don’t act this way. It’s–it’s wrong.”

            “Maybe, maybe not. Are you going to judge us, Kagome? If you are, then stay away
from me. I will not give Sesshoumaru up for you. I have waited all my life for my brother to love
me and accept me, and I will not give up what we have... not even for you.” The fists at his sides
relaxed and the tick along his jaw stopped twitching. “I love you, Saiai. I love you with all that I
am, but I love my brother too. I don’t expect you to be with ‘us’ like that, in fact, I don’t want
you there. What happens between Sesshou and I is for us only. It would be the same for you and
I should we ever mate. He would never be involved. So make whatever judgment you will,
Kagome. I don’t have anything left to hide or tell. You know everything now. Everything.”

            “I don’t know what to say.” She dropped her head and stared at his bare feet. “I can’t
accept you being lovers with your brother, Inu. That is wrong on so many levels I can’t even
begin to explain them all. To begin with, it just isn’t a natural sexual attraction and it should stop
immediately. You have to stop it, Inu. You... you can’t do this anymore.”

            “That isn’t going to happen, Kagome. He and I have already come to that conclusion
together... as well as the understanding that it’s not natural. We are not naive fools, woman, and
we are not innocent children... and this is not the first time in my life I have shared his bed.”

            “Wh-what?! Are you saying... Oh my God! Are you saying...” her hands rose to cover
her mouth as the horror of his revelation sank in.

            “Sesshoumaru raped me many times when I was a pup living at the castle after my mother
died. It was his way of showing his superiority over me, but all it really did was make me more
angry and determined not to let him break me.” Taking a shallow, unsteady breath, Inuyasha half
turned toward the door. “In a way, this is our way for making up for those years of pain and
abuse he put me through. It came as naturally to us as breathing and now–now we know we’ll
never be able to live without each other again. I know how strange that sounds, Kagome, believe
me, I do, but that is the simple truth of the matter. I love my brother and I need to be a physical
part of him, and as odd as that is, he is as drawn to me as I am to him.”

            “I can’t believe it. You... and Sesshoumaru... lovers?” The sound of defeat threaded its
way through her voice and she sank to the floor in heap of despair. “I can’t... I just can’t.”

            “Then I can’t stay here knowing what you think of us. It will be there in your eyes every
time you look at me and I won’t be able to deal with that.”

            “I... Gomen, Inu, but I can’t accept this. Not now, maybe not ever. I don’t know.”

            “I understand, Kagome.” He walked to the door and opened it. “I’ll always love you.
Nothing will ever change that. Nothing.” And then he was gone. The sounds of her pitiful
crying followed him as he disappeared into the night, and he knew he would hear them in his
dreams for many nights yet to come. But it couldn’t be helped. He couldn’t stay, not now. Not
anymore.

            It was time to go home. Home to Sesshoumaru.

            The night was dark and seemed somehow pregnant with the future. It was the new moon
and naught but the stars hung in the deep blue of midnight sky. A cool breeze started and as it
blew through the sakura trees, the leaves brushed together. Tiny crickets chirped the promise of a
good omen soon coming, and the monotonous sound brought the hint of a smile to the great
youkai’s lips.

            At times like this he almost wished he were a superstitious man and believed in all of that
spiritualist business of omens and good vs bad luck. If he did, he might be looking at this night
with a completely different perspective, but as it was, it was just another new moon and the
beginning of a new month cycle. Yet, something wiggled in the back of his mind causing him to
pause and think. There was something significant about the new moon it seemed, but he couldn’t
quite remember what it was. Shrugging to himself, Sesshoumaru cast one last look upward at the
starscape and then made to go back to the Palace, but something caught his attention out of the
corner of his eye.

            The keen amber gaze narrowed as he focused in on the movement that he perceived just
beyond the rose garden. It appeared to be a single individual moving at slow, staggering pace
along the edge of the outer path, but the darkness made it difficult to be sure. Sesshoumaru
growled low in his throat and sprang off the bench he was sitting on becoming nothing more than
a misty white blur as he charged the intruder. It took only a matter of seconds for him to reach
his quarry, and as he leapt into the air prepared to pull his sword and cleave the trespasser in half,
his nose caught a whiff of an unmistakable scent.

            ‘Inuyasha!’

            Turning in mid air, Sesshoumaru broke off his attack and landed on the ground a few feet
to the side of his exhausted brother. He ran immediately to Inu’s side and pulled him into his
arms, and it was at that point he made a rather startling discovery. Inuyasha was human. His
glorious silver-white hair was gone and in its place was a mane of ebony silk that fell through the
youkai’s fingers like velvet water.

            “Inuyasha!” His voice cracked as he scooped the frail human up into his arms and cradled
him against his chest. He had forgotten about the transformation the hanyou suffered once a
month on the new moon and knew that is what his mind was trying to remember earlier. “Are
you alright?” Worry colored Sesshoumaru’s voice when the raspy sound of his brothers breathing
finally registered on his ears. “How far have you walked like this?”

            “I–I don’t know, Sesshou.” The voice was so small. So weak. “I’m alright though–just
very tired.”

            “It’s almost morning, Inu. Did you walk all night?”

            “I guess so. I was so close... didn’t want to stop.”

            “Baka-hanyou!” Sesshoumaru growled and took off for the sanctuary and warmth of the
Palace. “Are you trying to kill yourself, you little idiot? You should know that your human form
cannot withstand the same stressors your demon body can. You’re lucky to have made it here at
all.”

            “It’s nice to see you too.”

            Sesshoumaru looked down to find laughing violet eyes gazing up at him and he couldn’t
help but smile a little. “Shut-up, baka. Save your strength. I don’t want you getting sick on me.”

            “Does this mean you missed me?” Despite the fatigue and frailty of his position, Inuyasha
couldn’t help but tease the grousing youkai just a little bit.

            “Do you think I’m going to give you the satisfaction of telling you something like that?”

            “Hai. I do.”

            “Insolent pup.”

            “Arrogant dog.”

            Gentle arms deposited Inu on a comfortable bed. Looking around through exhausted
eyes, he noticed with warm happiness that it was Sesshoumaru’s bed. It seemed like years since
he was there, and as he let his body relax and sink into the softness around him, he felt the
mattress give next to him. A moment later he was being drawn into a pair of powerful, muscular
arms that cradled him upon a wide, silk covered chest. The heart beating beneath his ear was
strong and steady and the comforting sound soon lulled him toward sleep.

            He was home. He was with Sesshoumaru again and everything was right with the world.
A languid smile curved his handsome lips and he instinctively snuggled closer to the warm body
beside him. A tender growl puffed the ebon bangs on his forehead just before a trembling
welcome kiss was placed on the crown of his head. The words may not have been spoken, but
Inu knew.

            He had been missed.

TBC

 

            

 

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