Affliction

**Disclaimer** Lyrics used in this chapter only are from Metallica's "Master of Puppets": Unfortunately, I don't own 'Tallica...*sigh* Boy do I wish...


"End of passion play, crumbling away. I'm your source of self-destruction..."

Or, maybe not...

Morning brought rolling fog and a thin overcast to blockade any sunlight, ribbons of ebony and ivory clouds scattered among the pale sky. The chateau appeared tastefully quaint as azure orbs marvelled over the architecture; it went without much saying that Sesshomaru had exquisite taste. Though for Inuyasha it still didn't feel much like home. Arguing from dawn til dusk, Sesshomaru refused greatly for his new mate to live on his own - one part afraid of Inuyasha leaving him for someone new and the other half feared the hanyou beginning his addiction all over again. He had given his younger brother all the space he wanted, but only under certain circumstances. Weariness began crashing over Inuyasha, making him prone to dangerous thinking of "what ifs". Self-doubt had always been a dominate weakness, but for whatever unforseen reason the agonizing defeat of control began to swell.

"Veins that pump with fear, sucking darkest clear. Leading on your death's construction..."

Miroku had called earlier. Thank the powers-that-be it had been after Sesshomaru scattered off for work; Inuyasha wasn't in the mood for a pms-ing youkai. Like an addicting drug, he was connected to Miroku; only as friends, but they were close enough that the hanyou considered him like a brother. Keh, he was more of a sibling to him more than Sesshomaru ever had been. Although that was becoming a faltering excuse these days since Sesshomaru was playing the role of saint and model sibling. Reluctantly, Inuyasha had agreed to catch up with Miroku and Kouga at some dive they used to frequent. They claimed to have been worried about him, wondered if everything was actually greener on the other side. Inuyasha despised keeping secrets from Sesshomaru especially considering the events of late. Giving himself over so humble, so vulnerable, allowing Inuyasha to see the layers beneath the ice...Inuyasha could not afford to ruin what has taken him decades to earn. To earn. Did he really earn it? Or, did his brother feel guilty, feel sorry for him...?

"Taste me you will see, more is all you need. You're dedicated to, how I'm killing you..."

The air was heady with aromas of alcohol and incense; everyone looked so frail, so death-like. It was all too familiar, still too fresh. Panic wrecked Inuyasha's body as azure globes frantically searched around only to find no safety here. A voice called out to him drowning out the moans and chatter; Inuyasha went motionless, the voice finally becoming familiar. A logy feeling ravished Inuyasha's body as he lazily started in the direction of the voice. Miroku and Kouga were lounged back upon a leathered couch, both onlooking with glazed eyes. It hadn't surprised him that his friends were already lit...he could smell it, the heroine and cocaine seeping from all around. It was enough for the presence of vomit to threaten to spew from dried lips.

"Come crawling faster. Obey your Master. Your life burns faster. Obey your Master...Master..."

"Hey, hey...if it isn't our little mutt. Have a seat stranger."

Mentally sighing, Inuyasha hesitantly slid into a recliner opposite the pair.

"So, how's being domesticated?"

"I'm not...domesticated."

"From what we've heard, it seems Mister-Hey-You-Get-Off-My-Cloud has got you by the balls, Inu."

"Whatever! Quite being such a bastard."

Furling the corner of his lips in a prideful smirk, Kouga tossed a pipe and lighter in the direction of the hanyou along with a bag of ivory powder.

"This will help take that edge off, ya little housewife..."

"Master of puppets, I'm pulling your strings. Twisting your mind, you can't see a thing. Just call my name, 'cause I'll hear you scream. Master. Master."

"No, thanks."

"Just call my name, 'cause I'll hear you scream. Master. Master..."

"Who the hell are you and where's that dumbass of a mutt at? You can't be serious! This is from the coast...it doesn't get much better than that right there."

Fidgeting with a nervousness scouring the confused mind and body, Inuyasha bore a hungry gaze upon the contents before stretched out upon the glass. It would be so easy to light up, shoot in, snort up. It wouldn't be easy explaining the actions to Sesshomaru and making what was done seem justifiable. There was a chance for a quick fix without the youkai ever knowing and therapy was three times a week - addiction was off into the abyss, there would be no way back down that spiral. Nails raked against holed jeans as an overwhelming feeling began to nag at Inuyasha, an overwhelming desire and craving. Pressuring looks ensued from Miroku and Kouga as if silently cheering him on. Weren't they the ones who had gotten the hanyou into that tangled mess to begin with?

"Needlework the way, never you betray. Life of death becoming clearer..."

"C'mon, mutt. Sesshie-Boy ain't here and we ain't gonna tell...so get on with it!"

"Pain monopoly, ritual misery. Chop your breakfast on a mirror..."

Reaching for the bag, Inuyasha could feel sweat pooling in his palms; a roaring like thunder beat to beat within the fluffed ears, it was almost as though the heroine was speaking to Inuyasha and only he could hear it. Could he betray Sesshomaru? Could he lie to him and live with the guilt of it all? Would this be his ending?

"Taste me you will see. More is all you need. You're dedicated to, how I'm killing you. Come crawling faster. Obey your Master. Your life burns faster. Obey your Master...Master..."

Guilt. Guilt had begun ripping Inuyasha from the inside out as an internal battle was ensuing. Fighting for some control of his own, the hanyou had been drilling nails into his flesh with one hand while reaching for the drug with the other.

"Master of puppets, I'm pulling your strings. Twisting your mind and smashing your dreams. Blinded by me, you can't see a thing. Just call my name, 'cause I'll hear you scream. Master. Master..."

"It won't come to you, mutt!"

"Just call my name, 'cause I'll hear your scream. Master. Master..."

Feeling the grain-filled bag within their grasp, fingertips danced along the fine beads. Inuyasha want more, needed more. Greed molded, twisted, reigned within. Common sense between doing what was right and doing what was desired fought viciously inside. Was Sesshomaru worth it? Was life worth it? No. Was his life worth it?

"Master, Master, where's the dreams that I've been after? Master, Master, you promised only lies. Laughter, laughter, all I hear or see is laughter. Laughter, laughter, laughing at my cries..."

Slitting the bag open, Inuyasha lifted it just beneath a curious nose and inhaled the opiate's scent. It was like heaven in little ivory specks. Temptation began to well, threatening to overflow if not silenced by its need.

"Hell is worth all that, natural habitat. Just a rhyme without a reason. Neverending maze, drift on numbered days. Now your life is out of season..."

Laving his tongue against a finger to slick it thick with salvia, Inuyasha dipped the digit into the sack. Fluttering it before azure orbs, a piqued curiosity rose as they beheld the tiny specks. It sparkled with the same sheen as an opal, taking the hanyou by awe over something so beautiful yet so deadly and life destroying.

"I will occupy. I will help you die. I will run through you. Now I rule you too..."

A thirsting tongue thrashed about ruby lips as Inuyasha dropped the finger before his mouth, his demeanor taking on a more sedated state.

"Come crawling faster. Obey your Master. Your life burns faster. Obey your Master. Master..."

A weak sound of distress whimpered from Inuyasha as flashes of Sesshomaru flickered through the abyss. An aching caused a reaction of shivers shattering the emotionally trashed body; agonizing confusion clouded the hanyou's judgement. More memories of Sesshomaru had begun feeding his thoughts more and more causing a terrible pain to shred through Inuyasha's body.

"Master of puppets, I'm pulling your strings. Twisting your mind and smashing your dreams. Blinded by me, you can't see a thing. Just call my name, 'cause I'll hear your scream. Master. Master..."

Powers-that-be, Inuyasha wanted, prayed for Sesshomaru to come barrelling in. To save him. This time, it was up to Inuyasha to save himself...

"Just call me name, 'cause I'll hear you scream. Master. Master."