Strength

Thank you all reviewers. Loves you a lots.
Sorry I have not been posting – BUT I have been editing Sacred Trees from the start (Since no one volunteered) n that is a mammoth task. :P and when I post the next chapter for that I will repost all the edited chapters as well. :).

This chapter kindda took a life of its own, its short not because I got tired or anything – but because it needed to be. Well read and see.


Chapter 15 : Silent Dawn

Inuyasha stood alone on the hill side. The muted golden rays of the predawn sun, rising beyond the horizon slowly washed Awa in its magnificent glow. He would miss it, the town, it had been a good place. Good to him and good for his pups. The wafting breeze picked up strands of silver hair and made them dance around the Hanyou, clad in simple gray clothing. Inuyasha's clawed fingers dropped to his swords, in a habitual gesture, he stroked the hilt as his mind wondered.

Everyone else was still asleep in their beds. Inuyasha had been driven from sleep by the familiar throbbing pain in his body. He had not made a sound as he slipped out of the bed crowded with five exhausted children and went to out to watch the sunrise.

How many sunrises had found the Hanyou in this state... Inuyasha had lost count a long time ago. Every time he had sought to forget for a while, the pain would come, and remind him that he was to die. Initially he had wanted to fight against the unfairness of it all, he had wanted to hate, but Inuyasha had quickly found the hate poisoning him, turning him into something he did not want to be. So Inuyasha had done the only thing he could think of doing, to stop himself from turning into a bitter creature that was angry at the whole world, a creature that rejected his own pups.

It had been his only defense, even before the pups had been born, Inuyasha had realized that if he hated Sesshoumaru, he would have transferred it onto his pups. So he had turned it on the only creature that he knew was strong enough to bear the pain. He had taken the anger and the hatred and turned it on himself. He had turned it into the belief that at some level, he had caused everything that had happened to him. He had chosen this path – so he could not complain, could not get mad at the consequences of his own actions. He had silently taken the blame for everything on to his own broad shoulders and it was a weight he had carried for so long – that he no longer paid it any attention.

He was going to die, so it hardly mattered what others did to him, he was strong, he could take it.
He smiled sadly as he watched the sun rise. It was amusing how even goddesses had fantasies. 'Happily ever after' it amazed Inuyasha how everyone seemed to be buying into that, Sesshoumaru, the Ookami, Kaede, even Miroku they all seemed to think that somehow everything was going to end in rainbows and roses. After all the whole Naraku incident had ended well. Inuyasha knew better.

Nothing came without a price. His parents had paid the price for his life, and he had paid the price to defeat Naraku. “Happily ever after” - what would be the price of his children's happiness? He knew – the price would be him accepting his bloody brother's touch, Inuyasha shuddered at the thought. If he shut his emotions aside, he could do it, his instincts after all accepted the DaiYoukai as his Alpha, it would not be so bad.. maybe.. hopefully. Keh! Whatever, bad or not he would deal with it.
He would let them try to save him, and he would not blame them when they failed.

Another litter of pups, Inuyasha's hand dropped to his belly. That was what Sesshoumaru really wanted, Inuyasha was sure of it. To be whole, Sesshoumaru probably needed to do the job of a good other father. Inuyasha could accept that. Another litter of pups, the sad smile touched his lips, Yuusha would need that, a distraction for when his papa was not with him. Another litter of pups, maybe that was what he needed after all, a reason to make his death even more meaningful than it was.

There was a danger in this, a danger that the new pups would follow him into death. No, Sesshoumaru was strong, if he joined his will with Sesshoumaru's he would find a way to stay alive though the critical first few hours. What ever it took, he would stay alive until the soul bond with the pups faded enough for the Pups to survive without him. Inuyasha was certain that Sesshoumaru would be able to hold the pups once they were through that critical period, just as he was certain that Sesshoumaru would never be able to do what was needed to save him. Oh, the DaiYoukai would try, it was not his fault that he would fail... the Goddess had asked the impossible, and it was funny how only he was able to see that. Still it was endearing that everyone wanted his pups happiness.

Inuyasha sighed. This time he would not make the mistake of telling anyone what he knew. He knew more about male pregnancy then any other being on the planet, he could figure out a way to keep alive long enough to make sure his second litter survived his death. He would NOT allow anyone else to pay the price, his family would be happy.

Thoughts chased in Inuyasha's head, like the leaves being tossed in the breeze, he allowed them to tumble through his head.

He felt the presence long before the tentative touch on his hand.

Inuyasha sank to the ground, and wordlessly drew Yuusha to his side. The pup leaned his head against his Papa's. The smile that formed on Inuyasha's lips was one of pure love, as he pressed his lips to his oldest son's forehead, before placing his cheek on the soft hair and continuing to watch the sunrise. Yuusha utterly contented, his too serious little face full of adoration, leaned close to his Papa as he too watched the sunrise.

Inuyasha held Yuusha close, it was worth it, all that had been and all that was to come, for this moment with his son, it was worth it. He would do what he must, inhuman determination filled the Hanyou. He would find a way to ensure they had their 'Happily ever after.'

The two watched the sunrise together. And Inuyasha buried under the burden of surviving, of responsibility and of caring for others -never realized that for the others 'happily ever after' was impossible... without him.

**

Sesshoumaru hidden from their sight and senses, stood watching his half brother and his son. Sesshoumaru had known the moment the Hanyou had left the house, and had silently followed. He could not read his little brother's mind, but he felt the radiating sadness from the lite frame. The Hanyou had seemed so alone and yet so strong, the DaiYoukai ached, he had wanted to go to his soon to be mate, but some instinct had stopped him. His brother had needed the solitude, and though it hurt him to watch, Sesshoumaru had forced himself to be still. The smile on the Hanyou's face more then anything almost broke the DaiYoukai. His will stretched to the limit, he was going to go to Inuyasha and demand the Hanyou cease feeling sad and alone, when he felt the presence of his son. Sesshoumaru had watched Yuusha approach his Papa tentatively, and was unsurprised at the immediate transformation in the Hanyou.

He watched the two framed by the trees, the pup leaning into his sitting Papa - they seemed to be almost one being, radiating love and contentment as the rising sun gave them both a soft golden glow.

Something inside Sesshoumaru stirred uncomfortably. As he watched them, he knew without a shadow of a doubt, if their son had been older, Yuusha could easily have been the one to save Inuyasha. Sesshoumaru was jealous of his own son- who had yet to lose his baby teeth. A small self mocking smile twisted the DaiYoukai's lips, it was a good thing that he had resources that the tiny version of him did not.

Sesshoumaru moved away silently, he would give the two the time they needed. His time would come, Sesshoumaru realized that loving the puppy eared Hanyou would be easy, convincing the Pup of his love would be the hard part. The sun rose, giving the DaiYoukai a halcyon aura, one day he would stand with his mate and watch the sunrise together, and their own glow would rival that of the morning sun, Sesshoumaru's will would not be denied.

--tbc---

See.. why this is short?? Review pretty please, :)

Please take note : Kishi is Yuusha's second, he will be a really loyal General to his big bro, but strictly no shipping – they are too close. Yuusha is a complex character, but Sesshy is right.. Yuusha loves his Papa more then anything, and IF Inuyasha was unmated when Yuusha is an adult- there would be issues. BUT absolutely NOT on Inuyasha's part – he is NO pedophile. But since Sesshy is going to make sure Inu is safely mated Yuusha will naturally grow out of it. :P
I am not shipping any of the children (hell I hardly even ship Shippo and he is an Adult in Sacred trees) so please I beg you, just enjoy the innocent cuteness. Cause that is all it is, cute innocent platonic love.