schedule
November 2, 2007 at 12:00 AM
this story has an interesting introduction
i hope to read more in the near future hopefully
i hope to read more in the near future hopefully
schedule
December 11, 2006 at 12:00 AM
more please
schedule
August 22, 2006 at 12:00 AM
OMG! What happens next? Please update soon.
schedule
July 7, 2006 at 12:00 AM
great fic please continue it is really good so please update soon...
schedule
July 4, 2006 at 12:00 AM
what other sites are you on? you sound like your a really good author, just that your computer was being stupid. well hope to see some updates from you soon! ja-ne ^-^
schedule
June 24, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Things to correct:
"The child had been taking a broke from her miko trainning..."
Correction - "The child had been taking a break from her miko trainning..."
""Be back in a hour." She shouted after her."
Correction - ""Be back in a hour," she shouted after her."
""A young girl is headed this way" The 11 year old announced"
Correction - ""A young girl is headed this way," the 11 year old announced."
Note the following corrections:
"Kagome wandered a quarter mile west toward a meadow of flowers, unknowningly walking into danger, a trap to capture young girls. A demon, around the age of 11, sat hidden in the trees surrounding the clearing waiting to spring the trap on any young girls who happen wander to far away from their village. With him sat a hanyou around the age of 9, who had never before gone on the hunt, eager to be able to choose a girl of his own."
Running a grammar and spell check on your work would help to catch most of these errors.
"The child had been taking a broke from her miko trainning..."
Correction - "The child had been taking a break from her miko trainning..."
""Be back in a hour." She shouted after her."
Correction - ""Be back in a hour," she shouted after her."
""A young girl is headed this way" The 11 year old announced"
Correction - ""A young girl is headed this way," the 11 year old announced."
Note the following corrections:
"Kagome wandered a quarter mile west toward a meadow of flowers, unknowningly walking into danger, a trap to capture young girls. A demon, around the age of 11, sat hidden in the trees surrounding the clearing waiting to spring the trap on any young girls who happen wander to far away from their village. With him sat a hanyou around the age of 9, who had never before gone on the hunt, eager to be able to choose a girl of his own."
Running a grammar and spell check on your work would help to catch most of these errors.
schedule
June 24, 2006 at 12:00 AM
A little short but keep it up
schedule
June 23, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Okay, so far this has the makings of what could be a good story. Your grammar and spelling is good, but my only suggestion would be that you make the chapters longer. If you want a real response for your fic you have to give people enough story to really get a feel for it adn to be interested enough to want to read more and you deifnitely want to come up with a title. Not having one might make it seem to some people like you don't really know what your own story is about.
That said I will be checking back to see what you are going do do next.
That said I will be checking back to see what you are going do do next.