style='font-size:16.0pt;line-height:150%;mso-ascii-font-family:Cambria;
mso-hansi-font-family:Cambria;mso-bidi-font-family:Cambria;color:#17365D;
letter-spacing:.25pt;mso-font-kerning:14.0pt'>Disclaimer: I own none of these
characters. I write the characters according to my own views about them. In
addition, I write them how I think they will react in the situations I place
them in. So please refrain from leaving reviews
stating they are OOC, since each person interprets such things differently.
style='mso-spacerun:yes'>
To See Him
style='font-size:16.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif"'>He
stands so proud, with his long black ponytail rippling in the wind. With his
hands on his hips, he once again tries to impress ‘her’. It is not that I
dislike her; well somewhat, I do, when it comes to him.
style='font-size:16.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif"'>
style='font-size:16.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif"'>It
is not as if she sees him really, how gorgeous he is. See how his body looks as
if sculpted with the finest tools.
style='font-size:16.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif"'>
style='font-size:16.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif"'>style='mso-spacerun:yes'> She just does not see all the love he holds
within him. Love just waiting to be unleashed on some fortunate soul.
style='font-size:16.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif"'>
style='font-size:16.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif"'>style='mso-spacerun:yes'> I have a hard time not seeing her as the
enemy. She leads him on; it’s subtle yet obvious that
she does it on purpose.
style='font-size:16.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif"'>
style='font-size:16.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif"'>I
know she is trying desperately to get a certain someone’s attention, I wish she
would use somebody else.
style='font-size:16.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif"'>
style='font-size:16.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif"'>Even
though, I am still asking myself how did all this happen? This
passionate desire for him, wanting him more than air, dreaming of him every
night without fail.
style='font-size:16.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif"'>
style='font-size:16.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif"'>Other
questions come to mind as well. Like when did Sango no longer hold my interest?
I don’t know the answer, no matter how many times I
ponder it.
style='font-size:16.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif"'>
style='font-size:16.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif"'>style='mso-spacerun:yes'> Why am I falling in love with another man? class=GramE>Very big question. I have always loved, practically worshipped
women. Now all of those things are directed towards
one man.
style='font-size:16.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif"'>
style='font-size:16.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif"'>style='mso-spacerun:yes'> But why do I not feel
this way towards Inuyasha? I mean for Buddha’s sake, I have bathed with the
white haired hanyou! I see him damn near everyday!
style='font-size:16.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif"'>
style='font-size:16.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif"'>style='mso-spacerun:yes'> Yet even though I think he is quite fetching,
he is my friend. I have even tried to see him the way I see Kouga, to no avail.
style='font-size:16.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif"'>
style='font-size:16.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif"'>style='mso-spacerun:yes'> When I see other attractive youkai and men, I
try to imagine myself intimate with them; it only makes my stomach turn. Guilt
actually gnaws at me, because I feel I am being untrue to my wolf prince.
style='font-size:16.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif"'>
style='font-size:16.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif"'>style='mso-spacerun:yes'> I see
him, with his beautiful pale blue eyes, maybe if I am lucky, three times a
month. It feels like it is my birthday, every time he comes our way. No other
woman or man has ever made me happy just by looking at them.
style='font-size:16.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif"'>
style='font-size:16.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif"'>I
am truly ruined.
style='font-size:16.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif"'>
style='font-size:16.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif"'>However,
I am still confused, why him and no other man? Are we meant
to be with each other? I really hope so, because even women are starting to
lose their appeal. It’s like my energy, emotions and
carnal desires are being bound towards him.
style='font-size:16.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif"'>
class=GramE>Sadlystyle='font-size:16.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif"'>
though, to him I don’t really exist. No one knows how hard I wish, that he
would pay me even the slightest bit of attention. To really
see me, see that my heart can be his.
style='font-size:16.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif"'>
class=GramE>Whostyle='font-size:16.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif"'>
am I kidding really, it already is his. No one draws me in as tightly as he
does. It’s just why can’t he fall for me, as I have
fallen for him?
style='font-size:16.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif"'>
style='font-size:16.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif"'>One
time, I was given hope that just maybe, he does at
least a little, feel that pull as I do.
style='font-size:16.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif"'>
style='font-size:16.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif"'>I
had bumped into him about 6 months ago, it was such a
beautiful feeling. It felt like my nerves exploded in vivid color.
style='font-size:16.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif"'>
style='font-size:16.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif"'>To
feel his body, what I have craved for so long against mine, even for a moment,
seemed as if he gave me the stars.
style='font-size:16.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif"'>
style='font-size:16.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif"'>I
guess my dazed expression, gave him the impression that I was fatigued. Next
thing I knew, he had picked me up, sat me down near a tree and told me to rest.
Then he actually berated Inuyasha about working my Kazanna too much!
style='font-size:16.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif"'>
style='font-size:16.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif"'>I
felt so cared for and loved, that I pretend he does it all the time. I swear
though afterwards he was gazing at me, with what emotion, I don’t
know, but I can imagine, right?
style='font-size:16.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif"'>
style='font-size:16.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif"'>Will
I ever tell him my feelings? Surely you jest, I still
want to live, to at least be able see him, even if I can never have him.
