Collide

Disclaimer: I own nothing. All character with the exception of those created for this fiction beling to Rumiko Takahashi

Auhtor Notes to Fans!

Yes the chapters have been re-posted but I wanted to say a few things to you all. Please bear with me. (Hope that's correct)

I quit. From the bottom of my heart, I had no intentions of ever wondering back into the world of fan fiction. After reading remarks about my writing, I felt that what I had contributed over the past three years was about a meaningful as the contents listing on the side of a box of cereal. I was completely embarrassed and utterly disgusted with myself. Yeah, I took it hard. I sat for a few days and I waddled in my pity. Drove my friends nuts with questions of what could I have done to make my writing more suitable…better?

Whew! When I first started out I had no clue what a novice writer in the business of fan fiction endured from day to day. I’d never met any, and so I really had no way of asking them what it was like. My only option was to strike out on my own. And so, I did just that writing horrifying pieces of work. In truth in the beginning I didn’t even know what a quotation mark was. I would mindlessly write dialogue with nothing separating it from the rest of the paragraphs.

I wouldn’t even attempt to add a comma. And my god the fragmented sentences were enough to make my English teacher pull her hair out. Gradually people came along who showed me, hey, you’re doing it all wrong. If you do it this way, it can be much better. It’s amazing the things you forget after being out of school for a while. I am proof the saying use it or lose it is true.

I would feel embarrassed, and depending on how forceful their remarks were, hurt, but somehow I managed to get back up and try one more time. I wanted to get this writing thing so bad. You see I had all these ideas in my head, and unless I was willing to keep going and improving along the way, I could never share them. So I kept at it. Kept at it when I wanted to cry. Kept at it when I wanted to lash out and tell flamers to go to hell, just kept at it no matter what.

It got to the point that when I finished a new chapter, I could actually see the improvements, and I felt really proud. I’d made these strides. I’d gotten back up after the verbal beat downs. WOW! The thing was I felt proud. A lot of people assumed that my pulling out of the fiction arena had something to do with the guild. Let me be clear. The ladies over at the Guild are doing what they see fit to award those who have shown excellence in the world of fan fiction writing. That is a good thing, just not my thing.

I am neither angry over the fact that my fic was disqualified, or bothered by it, since I never really cared about the guild to begin with. So don’t think their decision made me quit. What hurt me was when it was implied that I didn’t care about what I put out. In implying this , my pride was wounded. I care about everything I do. I use spell check and grammar check, but yah know what, they're only as good as the people who made the programs, and so a lot of things are over looked by the programs. They bear the imperfections of their creators who happen to be same as you and me, human.

What’s the purpose of this post you ask; well I wanted to talk to all my fans that left messages both in my email and in my review box on AFF. Man oh man! you guys really don’t know how you touched me. At best I expected maybe three people to say bye, but when I came onto the site and saw that box, I was like wow! For me? I thought I’d spare you a few words to tell you what you guys post meant to me. Some of you made me cry, others tore me a new ass (MAGGZ), some of you made me laugh, while others left me completely speechless with your heartfelt post. Thank you all sooo much! Reading what you had to say lifted my spirits and revitalized my drive to tell tales. I set out to have a little fun and according to you guys, I managed to do just that and a bit more. Knowing this is all the reward I will ever need. Thank you! Thank You! For inspiring me to get back up on the horse and try one more time. I will keep all of your kind words close to my heart.

That being said, I am in the process of overhauling my fiction for re-posting. There was a great amount of error in most of them, especially my older works, so it will take some time. Also, I won’t post until the up-dated chapters are complete and ready to accompany the previous chapters. Be patient with me. With so many works open at once, I have a lot of work ahead of me to get them in order for your viewing. I am sure I will lose fans along the way, but as someone said before, true lovers of the fictions will still be there. I look forward to stepping into the fan fiction arena again real soon. Thanks again guys for all your support and understanding. In the mean time, I have re-posted Collide, and I am currently working on the final chapter of Suddenly Daddy. Be patient, and Keep and Eye Open. If you want to read Collide, the chapters are now reposted for viewing.