Fire and Rain
folder
InuYasha AU/AR › Het - Male/Female
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
13
Views:
3,176
Reviews:
2
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
InuYasha AU/AR › Het - Male/Female
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
13
Views:
3,176
Reviews:
2
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own Inuyasha, nor do I own the characters from the series. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
Whole Again
I dry my tears at night with reviews.
Chapter Eight: Whole Again
(Love Song by The Cure)
It had been a week and two days since Halloween. A week and two days of not knowing where she stood with him. Kagome wanted to call, wanted to drop by the shrine even more, but something held her back. The message had been pretty darn clear. Inuyasha had said he’d wait, and then he hadn’t. Simple. He had wised up and realized he had married Kikyo for a reason. The lack of contact on his part just pulled everything together in one big obvious clusterfuck of rejection. Maybe, though, just maybe if they avoided each other long enough, the feelings would fade and one day she could pass him in the street and just smile and nod and not want to kiss him or cry or both.
“Lilies today for my beautiful woman,” Kōga said smoothly, sliding the bouquet into the vase already filled with water.
Kagome smiled weakly at him. “Thank you, they’re lovely.”
“Not as lovely as you.” Though the words were cliché, his face radiated genuine love and concern, and suddenly she wanted to cover her face or his eyes so he would not read her. “Chin up, Kagome. It’ll get better.”
“Mmmhmm.”
Why was she always so obvious?
Either Kōga had talked to them or her fellow employees sensed her mood, and everyone steered clear of her for the entire work day. Even the customers knew something was off, like she had a visible dark cloud above her raining down cold, wet misery on her head. She tried to smile and welcome people as they came into the shop, but she could feel it looked more like a grimace. Screaming internally, she glanced at the clock. She had five minutes until her lunch break. Maybe she could convince Kōga to let her take off for the rest of the day. Kagome didn’t want to take advantage of his feelings for her, but she thought it might be better for business if the customers didn’t have a creepy woman baring her teeth at them right as they walked through the door.
“Kagome?”
Startled, she whipped around to face Inuyasha. His voice had been so soft, so unlike how it usually was. It scared her. Something was wrong, just like she thought—no, knew.
“Yeah?”
“I need to tell you something. Can we… Do you have time to talk?”
She nodded. He looked as bad as she felt. Maybe he had a reason for not being there in the alley on Halloween. An image of Kikyo dead or dying came to her mind, and she felt sick at the little tinglings of hope flitting about her solar plexus.
“It’s my lunch break right now. We can get something to eat if you want. I’ll treat.”
He nodded, not meeting her eyes. “I’ll drive.”
Waving to Kōga to let him know she was going out on break, she followed Inuyasha to his car, her heart feeling heavy. He had looked so disturbed, sounded so depressed. Did he really not want her anymore? Her heart clenched in her chest. That was the worst thing she could imagine. Kagome knew for sure then, more certain than anything, that she needed him, she needed Inuyasha. What was the point of coming back from the brink of death if she couldn’t be with him? She had tried to tell herself being alive and getting a second chance was more than enough, a veritable miracle, but this miracle was just a punishment if he wasn’t by her side belonging to her completely as he was meant to be. Glancing at Inuyasha, noting how stiff his posture was, how hard he was gripping the steering wheel, she made up her mind.
She wasn’t going to lose him. Not again.
“Pull into the Taco Bell lot,” she said, her voice sounding too loud in his car. Grimacing, he did as she asked. He had never liked spicy or fast foods, but that wouldn’t matter right now. He moved to get up, but she placed a trembling hand on his, stopping him. “Let’s talk here.”
Inuyasha sighed and leaned his head back, closing his eyes, seemingly reluctant to begin. She waited patiently, and he finally started.
“Do you hate me?”
Shaking her head emphatically, she replied, “No! Never. I could never.”
“This would be so much better if you hated me.” She chose to ignore that, and after a short pause, he continued. “I hate myself. I’ve hated myself ever since you weren’t around to love me anymore. You should hate me, too.”
“I don’t care about Kikyo anymore!” she said solemnly, meaning every word. “I only care about you and me.”
A grim smile twisted his lips. “I’m not talking about Kikyo. I could have saved you, Kagome. I could have saved you and you never would have been hurt. I was right fucking there and I didn’t do anything but watch, just because I was afraid.”
Her brow furrowed. “Afraid of what, Inuyasha? There was nothing you could have done. You were too far away, behind the fence and everything. And even if you were closer, you would have been in my place and I would have been the one suffering without you.”
He just shook his head. She put her hand on his knee, encouraging him, but he pushed her away. Narrowing her eyes, she resolved not to let him speak. If he didn’t say anything, nothing would happen. They could stay the same, they could have a future. All she had to do was take it for the both of them.
“I love you, Inuyasha. I need you. I don’t care about anything else.”
“No,” he whispered, his eyes closing again, shutting tight. “Don’t say that, please don’t do this.”
Words were just making things worse. What he needed right now was to be touched. He always communicated better through actions, always understood actions better. A silent kiss to the cheek was what had begun their relationship in the first place, anyway. Unbuckling her seat belt, she reached over and unbuckled his as well, crawling onto his lap. Inuyasha half-heartedly tried to push her away, but there was minimal resistance. He wanted this. He wanted her. Pressing soft kisses to his closed mouth, she reached down and fumbled with the levers on the side of the seat, bringing it back and giving herself space to work, ensuring her butt wouldn’t wind up honking the horn and bringing attention to them. Finally, he began to kiss back, and his arms went around her, bringing her body closer to his own. His kisses were soft and loving as well, but with a desperate quality to them, his lips trembling underneath hers. She stopped kissing him and just held him, trying to force him to feel her love, to calm him down and take away his sadness.
“I love you, Inuyasha. Only you, now, then, and forever. Let me show you.”
Placing one last, lingering kiss to his lips, she kissed both his cheeks, his forehead, along his eyebrows, his eyelids, his nose, his ears. They were both smiling now, and she hoped that he felt the same overwhelming, almost too precious love bursting inside like she did. Kagome was blushing, filled with emotion. She wanted to laugh and cry and sing and dance.
“Kagome—Are we…?” he asked hesitatingly, his eyes unguarded and full of love and hope.
“Yes,” she whispered, unable to keep herself from kissing him again, seeking out his tongue and playing with it.
A new energy filled the car, and their breathing grew heavier. He unbuttoned her shirt carefully, thoroughly caressing each newly revealed patch of skin with his fingertips before moving on to the next, his mouth staying on hers. Finally, her shirt was completely unbuttoned, and she pulled away from him, shrugging it off. His large hands cupped and teased her over the satin of her bra, his fingers dancing around her nipples but never touching. She reached back behind herself and unhooked the bra, letting him pull it the rest of the way off. It was the first time he had ever seen them in a well-lit place, and his admiration was obvious. Wetting his lips, he kissed both straining pink tips with reserved adoration before bringing his head back up, his eyes blazing as he looked at her.
“I think we’d be more comfortable in the backseat.”
Smiling she crawled over him and into the backseat, not objecting to the way his hands passed over her body as she did so, for once unashamed. He crawled in after her, accepting her teasing touches as he pushed and pulled and finally got the seats to go all the way down, giving them a makeshift, somewhat uncomfortable bed, but one that would thoroughly serve their purpose. Facing her hesitantly, searching for and not seeing any regret in her eyes, Inuyasha removed his shirt, and Kagome was on him again, kissing down his chest and torso, playing with the beaded necklace he always wore, feeling him quiver beneath her soft, loving touch. His hands found her breasts again and she gasped as he expertly began to pinch and roll her nipples, rubbing and tugging at them. He removed her pants, taking her underwear with them, before he took off his own, flinging them both to the front seat and making them hit the window.
Before she knew it, she was on her back, not knowing whether he had done it or she had. Inuyasha had a feral look on his face which excited her, and he gave her a hard, deep, penetrating kiss before he dragged his tongue down to her breasts, licking and covering them with kisses. She moaned softly and stroked his dark hair, marveling at its length and softness, so much like hers. Greedily, he sucked her nipples into his mouth, one of his hands moving southward to her most secret place that not even he had ever touched directly.
“It’s gonna hurt the first few times, Kagome,” he explained, kissing every part of her he could. “I’ll be gentle.”
“It doesn’t matter. Just love me, Inuyasha,” she whispered into his hair, bringing him back up so she could taste his mouth again.
Their lips remained plastered together as he felt around, probing her and positioning himself. She squirmed underneath him, nervous with anticipation yet literally dripping in her want for his flesh and soul. Her body was so hot, and she needed him to be inside her, to fill her, to make her whole. Kagome bucked her hips up and he took the hint, removing his fingers from where they had been exploring her soft tunnel, rubbing the head of his cock against her, bumping it against her clit, smiling when she gasped and moaned. And then he entered her, sliding inside the tight, wet channel. Kagome cried out and clasped him to her, her eyes going to his. For a second, she thought they were gold, but then he began to move and she realized it had just been the autumn sunlight catching on some flecks in his beautifully murky eyes.
Sex didn’t hurt as much as she had thought it would. It actually felt utterly amazing. There had been so many stories about the pain and agony that accompanied the act of losing one’s virginity that she had been frightened and had avoided the final step of intimacy. If she had known it would feel so good, she would have jumped him on their very first date, hell, even before. He was reaching places inside of her she had not known existed, and she felt only some minimal uncomfortableness of being stretched, which was greatly overwhelmed by the aching, beautiful pleasure. Each movement was done with tenderness, love, and passion, and he kissed her again, transmitting his love to her with the contact.
Her orgasm was so close, and she was surprised. It couldn’t have been more than a few minutes that they were joined. She hadn’t prepared for anything like that. Then again, she hadn’t really prepared for anything. Over and over again during the ride there, she had told herself there would be pain, but she had not even considered entertaining ideas of the swelling, burning goodness he had created that was now spreading throughout her.
Kagome broke the kiss, her whimpers and whines increasing in volume. It was all too much, too, too much. Tears streaked down her temples and into her hair. Knowing instinctively what she was feeling, Inuyasha quickened his pace, himself being brought closer to the brink after witnessing how she had reacted to him after hardly any time.
“Oh god, oh Inuyasha!” she said, her voice thin, high, and shaky, almost like she was singing. Her body was so hot, and everything in her was straining, and she felt lightheaded. She couldn’t even think anymore. “I need—I love you, oh, I love you!”
She came then, clenching around him, her orgasm so powerful that even her arms were twitching and her gut hurt. Inuyasha let out a surprised cry and came inside of her, falling onto her and nuzzling the side of her neck, licking it and biting at it like an animal as he continued to twitch inside of her. The sensation prolonged her orgasm and she continued to shed tears and hold him closer. After a long while, he separated from her, rolling to the side. Kagome snuggled into him and he lazily draped an arm around her, kissing the top of her head.
“I’m gonna leave Kikyo,” he said steadily. “I’m gonna leave her as soon as I can. Just give her a big check and move out.”
The sunlight streaming in through the windows illuminated his form, making him look like he was sculpted. She stiffened. It was broad daylight and she had let him see her scars, he had touched her back when she crawled into the backseat, ran his hands over the discolored, roughened, flawed flesh. How had he found it within himself to continue to make love to her? She knew most people would want some sort of loving speech filled with pretty words to soothe their fears and reassure them, but his silence said everything. His silence comforted her more than any words ever could, and really confirmed that the physical record of her horrific accident was a non-issue for him, at least sexually. In that moment, Kagome couldn’t love Inuyasha more. Also, had anyone seen them copulate in a freaking Taco Bell parking lot? She cursed herself. She should have directed him to a different, more romantic location. Pretty much anything would have been better.
“I wish we could keep the shrine,” she murmured.
She thought it best not to share how guilty she felt. He had said repeatedly how incredibly unhappy he had been in his marriage. The only thing she could do now was live the life she had been meant to live and try her best not to make any more mistakes. Kagome thought of the small forest behind the property where she had played so many times growing up, imagining mystical creatures like fairies living deeper inside. The place was perfect for children. A thought came to her and she smiled without realizing it. There was a very real possibility that she was carrying a baby, Inuyasha’s baby, inside of her, or she would be soon. They’d be a real family.
“We probably can. She hates it there, anyway. Says it’s too quiet, and she doesn’t like living so close to the graves.”
“And then we can live there together,” she murmured, kissing his chest. “Eat together, sleep together, be together.” Them and their baby.
He smiled. “You can quit your job and work for me. And after a while, we can travel. We can go anywhere and everywhere. I’ll get the time off and we can get married somewhere beautiful.”
“Sounds like a plan,” she said softly. “But now I have to get back to work.” She felt wonderfully energetic and wanted to get back and make up for her poor performance that morning, though a bigger part of her wanted to stay with him and dream about their future and trade kisses and maybe go for one more round of deliriously amazing sex.
Inuyasha groaned. “Got what you wanted and now you’re going to just walk out and break my heart?” he joked.
“Don’t hate the player, baby, hate the game,” she laughed as she put her clothes back on, savoring the feeling of his seed still inside her and on her skin. She never wanted to wash.
“I’ve got to get back, too. I’ll see you tomorrow?”
“Sure.” They kissed, stopping only when Kagome felt herself becoming aroused again.
Inuyasha held her hand the entire drive back and Kagome had never felt more loved. She had done it. It. She had lost her virginity, and to Inuyasha, too. The only thing that put a damper on her feelings was that she wasn’t his first as well. Shrugging the creeping negativity off, she consoled herself with the fact that she had been the only one to really have his heart. The soul mattered infinitely more than the flesh.
When she entered the shop, Hojo was waiting for her, standing right by the door, juggling a stack of books.
“Kagome!” he said, delighted. “They said you’d be back ten minutes ago, so I decided to wait.”
She blushed. “Sorry, I lost track of time. Those for your nieces and nephews?”
“Yup! They just love the stories you guys have here. I can’t find them anywhere else.”
Smiling, she walked over to the registers, scanning his books and bagging them. “That’ll be $51.08.”
He took out his wallet and handed over the money. “You know, I always thought you were beautiful. I was just too shy to approach you back in high school,” he said with a sheepish grin. “But I’m not a kid anymore. What do you say to a dinner date with me?”
Stunned, Kagome didn’t know how to react. So she just cleared her throat and handed him the paper bag of books.
“Uh, sorry, Hojo! I would love to hang out as friends, but I have a boyfriend.” It hurt her to hurt him, and he had probably been trying for a while to gain confidence to broach the idea of getting together, but the truth was the truth. She was done playing games.
His expression changed subtly, hardening, most likely to conceal his embarrassed disappointment. “Oh. Your boss?”
She laughed nervously. “No, though we are good friends. It’s same old, same old with me. Inuyasha’s always been the one.” Smiling fondly, she pictured his face, wondered when they would find time to be intimate again.
“Isn’t he married to your sister?”
Kagome choked. “Uh, i-is there anything else you need, Hojo?”
The tall man just looked at her, understanding dawning in his eyes. After a while, he shook his head. “No thanks. I just have to say, I thought you were better than that. Guess I thought wrong.”
Her happiness fled.
Chapter Eight: Whole Again
(Love Song by The Cure)
It had been a week and two days since Halloween. A week and two days of not knowing where she stood with him. Kagome wanted to call, wanted to drop by the shrine even more, but something held her back. The message had been pretty darn clear. Inuyasha had said he’d wait, and then he hadn’t. Simple. He had wised up and realized he had married Kikyo for a reason. The lack of contact on his part just pulled everything together in one big obvious clusterfuck of rejection. Maybe, though, just maybe if they avoided each other long enough, the feelings would fade and one day she could pass him in the street and just smile and nod and not want to kiss him or cry or both.
“Lilies today for my beautiful woman,” Kōga said smoothly, sliding the bouquet into the vase already filled with water.
Kagome smiled weakly at him. “Thank you, they’re lovely.”
“Not as lovely as you.” Though the words were cliché, his face radiated genuine love and concern, and suddenly she wanted to cover her face or his eyes so he would not read her. “Chin up, Kagome. It’ll get better.”
“Mmmhmm.”
Why was she always so obvious?
Either Kōga had talked to them or her fellow employees sensed her mood, and everyone steered clear of her for the entire work day. Even the customers knew something was off, like she had a visible dark cloud above her raining down cold, wet misery on her head. She tried to smile and welcome people as they came into the shop, but she could feel it looked more like a grimace. Screaming internally, she glanced at the clock. She had five minutes until her lunch break. Maybe she could convince Kōga to let her take off for the rest of the day. Kagome didn’t want to take advantage of his feelings for her, but she thought it might be better for business if the customers didn’t have a creepy woman baring her teeth at them right as they walked through the door.
“Kagome?”
Startled, she whipped around to face Inuyasha. His voice had been so soft, so unlike how it usually was. It scared her. Something was wrong, just like she thought—no, knew.
“Yeah?”
“I need to tell you something. Can we… Do you have time to talk?”
She nodded. He looked as bad as she felt. Maybe he had a reason for not being there in the alley on Halloween. An image of Kikyo dead or dying came to her mind, and she felt sick at the little tinglings of hope flitting about her solar plexus.
“It’s my lunch break right now. We can get something to eat if you want. I’ll treat.”
He nodded, not meeting her eyes. “I’ll drive.”
Waving to Kōga to let him know she was going out on break, she followed Inuyasha to his car, her heart feeling heavy. He had looked so disturbed, sounded so depressed. Did he really not want her anymore? Her heart clenched in her chest. That was the worst thing she could imagine. Kagome knew for sure then, more certain than anything, that she needed him, she needed Inuyasha. What was the point of coming back from the brink of death if she couldn’t be with him? She had tried to tell herself being alive and getting a second chance was more than enough, a veritable miracle, but this miracle was just a punishment if he wasn’t by her side belonging to her completely as he was meant to be. Glancing at Inuyasha, noting how stiff his posture was, how hard he was gripping the steering wheel, she made up her mind.
She wasn’t going to lose him. Not again.
“Pull into the Taco Bell lot,” she said, her voice sounding too loud in his car. Grimacing, he did as she asked. He had never liked spicy or fast foods, but that wouldn’t matter right now. He moved to get up, but she placed a trembling hand on his, stopping him. “Let’s talk here.”
Inuyasha sighed and leaned his head back, closing his eyes, seemingly reluctant to begin. She waited patiently, and he finally started.
“Do you hate me?”
Shaking her head emphatically, she replied, “No! Never. I could never.”
“This would be so much better if you hated me.” She chose to ignore that, and after a short pause, he continued. “I hate myself. I’ve hated myself ever since you weren’t around to love me anymore. You should hate me, too.”
“I don’t care about Kikyo anymore!” she said solemnly, meaning every word. “I only care about you and me.”
A grim smile twisted his lips. “I’m not talking about Kikyo. I could have saved you, Kagome. I could have saved you and you never would have been hurt. I was right fucking there and I didn’t do anything but watch, just because I was afraid.”
Her brow furrowed. “Afraid of what, Inuyasha? There was nothing you could have done. You were too far away, behind the fence and everything. And even if you were closer, you would have been in my place and I would have been the one suffering without you.”
He just shook his head. She put her hand on his knee, encouraging him, but he pushed her away. Narrowing her eyes, she resolved not to let him speak. If he didn’t say anything, nothing would happen. They could stay the same, they could have a future. All she had to do was take it for the both of them.
“I love you, Inuyasha. I need you. I don’t care about anything else.”
“No,” he whispered, his eyes closing again, shutting tight. “Don’t say that, please don’t do this.”
Words were just making things worse. What he needed right now was to be touched. He always communicated better through actions, always understood actions better. A silent kiss to the cheek was what had begun their relationship in the first place, anyway. Unbuckling her seat belt, she reached over and unbuckled his as well, crawling onto his lap. Inuyasha half-heartedly tried to push her away, but there was minimal resistance. He wanted this. He wanted her. Pressing soft kisses to his closed mouth, she reached down and fumbled with the levers on the side of the seat, bringing it back and giving herself space to work, ensuring her butt wouldn’t wind up honking the horn and bringing attention to them. Finally, he began to kiss back, and his arms went around her, bringing her body closer to his own. His kisses were soft and loving as well, but with a desperate quality to them, his lips trembling underneath hers. She stopped kissing him and just held him, trying to force him to feel her love, to calm him down and take away his sadness.
“I love you, Inuyasha. Only you, now, then, and forever. Let me show you.”
Placing one last, lingering kiss to his lips, she kissed both his cheeks, his forehead, along his eyebrows, his eyelids, his nose, his ears. They were both smiling now, and she hoped that he felt the same overwhelming, almost too precious love bursting inside like she did. Kagome was blushing, filled with emotion. She wanted to laugh and cry and sing and dance.
“Kagome—Are we…?” he asked hesitatingly, his eyes unguarded and full of love and hope.
“Yes,” she whispered, unable to keep herself from kissing him again, seeking out his tongue and playing with it.
A new energy filled the car, and their breathing grew heavier. He unbuttoned her shirt carefully, thoroughly caressing each newly revealed patch of skin with his fingertips before moving on to the next, his mouth staying on hers. Finally, her shirt was completely unbuttoned, and she pulled away from him, shrugging it off. His large hands cupped and teased her over the satin of her bra, his fingers dancing around her nipples but never touching. She reached back behind herself and unhooked the bra, letting him pull it the rest of the way off. It was the first time he had ever seen them in a well-lit place, and his admiration was obvious. Wetting his lips, he kissed both straining pink tips with reserved adoration before bringing his head back up, his eyes blazing as he looked at her.
“I think we’d be more comfortable in the backseat.”
Smiling she crawled over him and into the backseat, not objecting to the way his hands passed over her body as she did so, for once unashamed. He crawled in after her, accepting her teasing touches as he pushed and pulled and finally got the seats to go all the way down, giving them a makeshift, somewhat uncomfortable bed, but one that would thoroughly serve their purpose. Facing her hesitantly, searching for and not seeing any regret in her eyes, Inuyasha removed his shirt, and Kagome was on him again, kissing down his chest and torso, playing with the beaded necklace he always wore, feeling him quiver beneath her soft, loving touch. His hands found her breasts again and she gasped as he expertly began to pinch and roll her nipples, rubbing and tugging at them. He removed her pants, taking her underwear with them, before he took off his own, flinging them both to the front seat and making them hit the window.
Before she knew it, she was on her back, not knowing whether he had done it or she had. Inuyasha had a feral look on his face which excited her, and he gave her a hard, deep, penetrating kiss before he dragged his tongue down to her breasts, licking and covering them with kisses. She moaned softly and stroked his dark hair, marveling at its length and softness, so much like hers. Greedily, he sucked her nipples into his mouth, one of his hands moving southward to her most secret place that not even he had ever touched directly.
“It’s gonna hurt the first few times, Kagome,” he explained, kissing every part of her he could. “I’ll be gentle.”
“It doesn’t matter. Just love me, Inuyasha,” she whispered into his hair, bringing him back up so she could taste his mouth again.
Their lips remained plastered together as he felt around, probing her and positioning himself. She squirmed underneath him, nervous with anticipation yet literally dripping in her want for his flesh and soul. Her body was so hot, and she needed him to be inside her, to fill her, to make her whole. Kagome bucked her hips up and he took the hint, removing his fingers from where they had been exploring her soft tunnel, rubbing the head of his cock against her, bumping it against her clit, smiling when she gasped and moaned. And then he entered her, sliding inside the tight, wet channel. Kagome cried out and clasped him to her, her eyes going to his. For a second, she thought they were gold, but then he began to move and she realized it had just been the autumn sunlight catching on some flecks in his beautifully murky eyes.
Sex didn’t hurt as much as she had thought it would. It actually felt utterly amazing. There had been so many stories about the pain and agony that accompanied the act of losing one’s virginity that she had been frightened and had avoided the final step of intimacy. If she had known it would feel so good, she would have jumped him on their very first date, hell, even before. He was reaching places inside of her she had not known existed, and she felt only some minimal uncomfortableness of being stretched, which was greatly overwhelmed by the aching, beautiful pleasure. Each movement was done with tenderness, love, and passion, and he kissed her again, transmitting his love to her with the contact.
Her orgasm was so close, and she was surprised. It couldn’t have been more than a few minutes that they were joined. She hadn’t prepared for anything like that. Then again, she hadn’t really prepared for anything. Over and over again during the ride there, she had told herself there would be pain, but she had not even considered entertaining ideas of the swelling, burning goodness he had created that was now spreading throughout her.
Kagome broke the kiss, her whimpers and whines increasing in volume. It was all too much, too, too much. Tears streaked down her temples and into her hair. Knowing instinctively what she was feeling, Inuyasha quickened his pace, himself being brought closer to the brink after witnessing how she had reacted to him after hardly any time.
“Oh god, oh Inuyasha!” she said, her voice thin, high, and shaky, almost like she was singing. Her body was so hot, and everything in her was straining, and she felt lightheaded. She couldn’t even think anymore. “I need—I love you, oh, I love you!”
She came then, clenching around him, her orgasm so powerful that even her arms were twitching and her gut hurt. Inuyasha let out a surprised cry and came inside of her, falling onto her and nuzzling the side of her neck, licking it and biting at it like an animal as he continued to twitch inside of her. The sensation prolonged her orgasm and she continued to shed tears and hold him closer. After a long while, he separated from her, rolling to the side. Kagome snuggled into him and he lazily draped an arm around her, kissing the top of her head.
“I’m gonna leave Kikyo,” he said steadily. “I’m gonna leave her as soon as I can. Just give her a big check and move out.”
The sunlight streaming in through the windows illuminated his form, making him look like he was sculpted. She stiffened. It was broad daylight and she had let him see her scars, he had touched her back when she crawled into the backseat, ran his hands over the discolored, roughened, flawed flesh. How had he found it within himself to continue to make love to her? She knew most people would want some sort of loving speech filled with pretty words to soothe their fears and reassure them, but his silence said everything. His silence comforted her more than any words ever could, and really confirmed that the physical record of her horrific accident was a non-issue for him, at least sexually. In that moment, Kagome couldn’t love Inuyasha more. Also, had anyone seen them copulate in a freaking Taco Bell parking lot? She cursed herself. She should have directed him to a different, more romantic location. Pretty much anything would have been better.
“I wish we could keep the shrine,” she murmured.
She thought it best not to share how guilty she felt. He had said repeatedly how incredibly unhappy he had been in his marriage. The only thing she could do now was live the life she had been meant to live and try her best not to make any more mistakes. Kagome thought of the small forest behind the property where she had played so many times growing up, imagining mystical creatures like fairies living deeper inside. The place was perfect for children. A thought came to her and she smiled without realizing it. There was a very real possibility that she was carrying a baby, Inuyasha’s baby, inside of her, or she would be soon. They’d be a real family.
“We probably can. She hates it there, anyway. Says it’s too quiet, and she doesn’t like living so close to the graves.”
“And then we can live there together,” she murmured, kissing his chest. “Eat together, sleep together, be together.” Them and their baby.
He smiled. “You can quit your job and work for me. And after a while, we can travel. We can go anywhere and everywhere. I’ll get the time off and we can get married somewhere beautiful.”
“Sounds like a plan,” she said softly. “But now I have to get back to work.” She felt wonderfully energetic and wanted to get back and make up for her poor performance that morning, though a bigger part of her wanted to stay with him and dream about their future and trade kisses and maybe go for one more round of deliriously amazing sex.
Inuyasha groaned. “Got what you wanted and now you’re going to just walk out and break my heart?” he joked.
“Don’t hate the player, baby, hate the game,” she laughed as she put her clothes back on, savoring the feeling of his seed still inside her and on her skin. She never wanted to wash.
“I’ve got to get back, too. I’ll see you tomorrow?”
“Sure.” They kissed, stopping only when Kagome felt herself becoming aroused again.
Inuyasha held her hand the entire drive back and Kagome had never felt more loved. She had done it. It. She had lost her virginity, and to Inuyasha, too. The only thing that put a damper on her feelings was that she wasn’t his first as well. Shrugging the creeping negativity off, she consoled herself with the fact that she had been the only one to really have his heart. The soul mattered infinitely more than the flesh.
When she entered the shop, Hojo was waiting for her, standing right by the door, juggling a stack of books.
“Kagome!” he said, delighted. “They said you’d be back ten minutes ago, so I decided to wait.”
She blushed. “Sorry, I lost track of time. Those for your nieces and nephews?”
“Yup! They just love the stories you guys have here. I can’t find them anywhere else.”
Smiling, she walked over to the registers, scanning his books and bagging them. “That’ll be $51.08.”
He took out his wallet and handed over the money. “You know, I always thought you were beautiful. I was just too shy to approach you back in high school,” he said with a sheepish grin. “But I’m not a kid anymore. What do you say to a dinner date with me?”
Stunned, Kagome didn’t know how to react. So she just cleared her throat and handed him the paper bag of books.
“Uh, sorry, Hojo! I would love to hang out as friends, but I have a boyfriend.” It hurt her to hurt him, and he had probably been trying for a while to gain confidence to broach the idea of getting together, but the truth was the truth. She was done playing games.
His expression changed subtly, hardening, most likely to conceal his embarrassed disappointment. “Oh. Your boss?”
She laughed nervously. “No, though we are good friends. It’s same old, same old with me. Inuyasha’s always been the one.” Smiling fondly, she pictured his face, wondered when they would find time to be intimate again.
“Isn’t he married to your sister?”
Kagome choked. “Uh, i-is there anything else you need, Hojo?”
The tall man just looked at her, understanding dawning in his eyes. After a while, he shook his head. “No thanks. I just have to say, I thought you were better than that. Guess I thought wrong.”
Her happiness fled.