Come Undone

A/N:You guys don't know how much it means to me when you review. Here is the final chapter; I hope you enjoy it because the ride was fun while it lasted. Now... ON WITH THE ENDING!!!

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No amount of fantasizing or role-playing can ever replace what is real between you and Kagome.

And no amount of your past regrets and ‘what ifs’ can ever overcome what is genuine and honest and beautifully real in and of itself: that even though there is often a stark difference between one’s ‘first love’ and ‘true love’, to Kagome Higurashi, you and your relationship have become a fantastic union of both realities…

You are her first true love.

You are silent with awe and appreciation. You open your mouth to say something, only to find that words refuse to come out.

She raises her hand as a sign to stop. “It’s okay, Sesshoumaru. You don’t have to say anything.”

“No,” you shake your head this time, still reeling a bit from her confession. “I didn’t know.”

She gives you a sympathetic smile, then, and speaks in a voice that holds neither shame nor misgivings about who you really are to her.

“Now you do.”

You lean your head down to give her a chaste kiss, stealing her breath away, before following it with another.

She settles back onto your chest after the kiss, and your mind unconsciously begins to replay the evening’s rendezvous: from your initial phone call and Kagome’s much-anticipated arrival, to the seductive interplay and the particulars of your fantasy. You can’t help the smirk that twists your face as you remember each decadent detail, each delicious second of having your lover indulge you and your birthday fantasy.

But then a single detail worms its way into your thoughts, and you can’t help but wonder how serious Kagome was at the time. You know it’s really silly, maybe even foolish to ask, but you can’t seem to stop thinking about it.

What if…?

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You try to shake off this one persistent thought from your head, but the beast in you doesn’t want to give it up, doesn’t want to let it go, no matter how silly or foolish it may sound to your lover. And with a heavy sigh you know she felt, you decide to break the easy silence.

“May I ask a question?” you say finally, and this time, it’s her turn to give you a concerned look.

“Go on.”

“This Sesshoumaru was just thinking…” you hesitate a bit, and Kagome catches onto that, giving you a stare that’s curious enough to make you nervous.

“Sesshoumaru, just tell me,” Kagome blurts out finally. “What is it?”

Letting out a resigned breath, you at last look into the most beautiful blue depths you’ve ever seen and return a sheepish smile.

“You were not actually planning on making me do this little charade with a jacket on, were you?”

Silence.

Followed by a frown…

And then the most amazing and devious grin spreads across Kagome’s face, and you can’t help but release the breath you’ve unconsciously been holding, relief evident on your face.

“Let’s just say you’re really lucky that that was just part of the act,” she winks mischievously. “Otherwise, I really don’t think you could’ve agreed to my counteroffer so easily.”

“Possibly,” you concede, half shrugging, half teasing. “Or probably not. Guess we’ll never know, will we?”

“Guess not.”

“Still,” you say, shrugging once more. “It is amusing to imagine what you would actually do if you were an escort, bargaining and all. How did you know how much to ask for?” you ask curiously.

“Oh, I did my homework,” she winks, that teasing, mischievous smirk returning. “Trust me… I have my sources.”

Your eyebrow raises at that. “Oh, really? Care to share?” you state more than ask.

She merely chuckles at your reaction, “No, not really.”

“You know you want to tell me.”

She laughs some more, shaking her head, “Actually, I don’t know that,” she teases back, and you groan in mock frustration. She continues, redirecting the question somewhat, “Besides… what does it matter anyway? Am I not worth every dime?” she asks you now, coyly, employing that puppy dog look again that you find so hard to resist.

Damn.

She’s good.

Damn good.

And you can’t help yourself.

Your eyes dance as you give her a most affectionate smile. Then leaning forward, you wrap your arms demonstratively around her torso once more, coaxing her with the barest of efforts to come lie on your chest again, before pressing a soft kiss against her temple, your lips lingering warmly on the spot.

“More than that, my love,” you murmur lovingly into her ear. “So much more than that…” you repeat, as if to confirm it to yourself what a priceless gift it is to have Kagome Higurashi as your lover, your friend.

She smiles genuinely, and turns her face now to give you a chaste kiss. And leaning her head back against your shoulder once more, she settles deeper into your embrace with a leaden sigh, hugging herself with your arms, wanting to hold onto this exquisite moment for as long as she can.

You sense trepidation, faint uncertainty in her movements, and you turn your gaze to study her, trying to determine what has caused the subtle but obvious shift.

“Is something burdening you?” you ask finally, apprehension lacing your voice.

Refusing to meet your gaze, she takes in a slow, wavering breath to ease her anxiety and then waits just a few seconds longer before answering.

“I, uhm… I promised to do anything you wanted,” she prefaces hesitantly, her voice unusually quiet, as if to ask where things are now in this fantasy. “So, what happens now?”

Implicitly, you understand what Kagome’s thinking; where she’s going with that train of thought. She knows that even though you’ve been together exclusively for several months now, that neither of you have taken the initiative, the leap, so to speak, into making this relationship more official, more established.

You have clothes and personal items in each other’s places. And both of you have had your fair share of sleepovers and sleep-unders in each other’s beds. You’ve been lovers in almost every sense of the word for quite a while now, yes.

But neither of you have had the nerve to broach the subject of living together, of settling jointly into one residence – one place to call your home.

Commitment.

Why?

Because you’re always mindful of the line that says, “Things are moving too fast.” And the last thing either of you want is for this relationship to fizzle out before it could even begin the slow burn for the long run.

You realize, however, that even though Kagome’s merely asking what else you want her to do for you tonight, where you want her to be in this fantasy, that this is as good a time as any to tell her exactly what you’ve been feeling for a while now. It’s time to confess to your lover your heart’s conviction… and hope that she’s ready to make the change as well, to take that proverbial leap along with you.

Because that would just be sweet, sweet icing on this incredible birthday cake that is your night.

And that would make you the happiest committed youkai in all of Tokyo.

And so, you don’t even hesitate when you give her your response. There is no question about it: you already know what you want from her next.

“Stay.”

Your answer spills from your mouth without wavering, your voice barely above the beseeching of a whisper. And yet you know that she heard you. You know that she felt the weight of your meaning in the softness of those spoken words.

“Stay with me… Stay right here… Stay in my arms… Stay the night… Stay in my life…”

She turns her head now to look at you with wide-eyed incredulity, recognizing completely the significant undercurrent in your reply.

“You… want me to stay?” she asks you now, wanting to hear, to confirm for herself again that she’s not merely imagining things, that she’s not misreading your words, assigning meaning where there is none.

A most sincere smile twists up in your face as you hold her searching gaze, your eyes lighting up, glimmering with hopefulness and profound joy at the possibility of spending ‘together’ with your Kagome forever.

“I want you to stay, Kagome,” you reply finally, truthfully, laying down your heart and all its vulnerabilities for her to see, to examine if she so chooses.

And she does.

You can see it in the way she’s looking at you, studying you as if she’s hanging on to every one of your words.

“This Sesshoumaru doesn’t want to keep wondering who’s staying where each and every night. This Sesshoumaru doesn’t want to continue saying good-bye,” you elaborate, pain and honesty so clearly transparent in every word. “I want to stay like this with you. Like this…” you trail off this time, even as you emphasize exactly what you’re trying to say.

The most emotion you have ever felt in your life boils beneath your hard, cold surface, demanding to come out. Your heart fills with such love and such devotion; you have amazingly have a hard time keeping your voice level. You sigh the words longingly into her ear.

“Just like this…”

Her face softens in comprehension, and you notice her eyes becoming glassy with restrained tears as she cups your jaw tenderly, a wet thumb caressing the stripes adorning your cheek. Your hand reaches up to cover her own, and you close your eyes briefly when you lean your face into her palm, turning your head not a moment later to kiss it with tenderness.

You’re still covering her hand when your amber orbs meet her calming waters. And nervous anticipation now blooms in the pit of your stomach as you wait patiently for her to speak her mind, watching intently as she swallows hard to find the voice to tell you precisely what she thinks, what she feels.

“I love you, Sesshoumaru,” she tells you categorically, solemnly, and you believe it without reservation because you can see it’s profoundly true in the transparent depths of her eyes.

You grasp her hand more fully and tangle your fingers together, bringing them down above her breasts, your palm on the back of her hand as you set them lovingly, directly on top of her heart, knowing exactly what those four tiny words imply. And with a gentle squeeze of your hand, you cuddle her closer to your frame and utter the only words that are spilling to an overflow in your chest.

“I love you too,” you reply earnestly, the look in your eyes equally liquid, sincere in its joy.

“Happy birthday, love,” Kagome says at last. “I hope you enjoyed your present.”

And with that, she sinks back onto your shoulder and closes her eyes, drawing in a deep, long breath as she relaxes wholly into your strong, protective arms, settling utterly into the warm, enveloping shelter of your embrace…

Right where you know she belongs.

She drifts off to sleep soon after, a ghost of a smile still quirking on her innocently beautiful face.

You spend the next few minutes just watching her slumber, feeling the deepening weight of her body against your frame, captivated by the languid and steadily slowing rise and fall of her breasts, her face a picturesque portrait of contented peace:

Innocent.

Unperturbed.

Exquisite.

At last, you breathe in her scent and drop an adoring kiss on her cheek. Then, you settle back delicately, being careful not to disturb Kagome too much as you sink just a bit lower into the still-warm water.

And finally leaning back more comfortably against the stack of towels behind your head, you inhale deeply and close your eyes as well, letting out an exhausted but contented breath as you let yourself relax beneath your lover’s form, keeping your arms wound possessively, devotedly around her, even as you, also, drift off to sleep…

Even as you both come undone.

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A/N:Ahhh. Sadly, the story has finally come to a close. I really enjoyed writing this and would like to thank all those who reviewed and kept the story going. Did you all like it? Tell me what you think!