Inuyasha Tails
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InuYasha Crossovers › General
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
9
Views:
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Currently Reading:
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Category:
InuYasha Crossovers › General
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
9
Views:
4,220
Reviews:
4
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
Once upon a time there was a story and it had a bunch of swear words in it. It maybe even had some sex, but maybe not. So, fasten your seatbelts and get ready for the ride. I do not own Inuyasha. I also don't make money at all writing crap. I sp
The Search for the Holy Grail Tale
The Search for the Holy Grail Tale
The great King of Japan’s Demons rode his trusty steed into the forests of Inuyasha. It was a ridiculous named place and if they knew the King’s brother they would know why.
“Jaken you can stop with the coconuts already. Ah-Un doesn’t clomp.”
They had been through dangers untold walking past the winding river, through the muddy banks of Moss Hazard County, had eaten wasabi without wincing, and had once used an outhouse. There was nothing the great King couldn’t handle except for the fact he couldn’t scratch his neck on his own in full dog form nor scratch his ears. Jaken sucked at that so they had to find the Holy Grail since Rin took off with it after going over to her Aunt and Uncle’s for a sleepover for a couple of years. Apparantly some human kinigits in England needed the thing for the Crusades as if Buddha couldn’t give them what they wanted the bastard heretics.
As soon as the King arrived at his evil human Stepmother who gave him cookies and was pretty’s old castle that was being remodeled the King just knew that there was going to be a problem. His fluffy would get wet in the moat if his stupid brother didn’t lower the drawbridge. It was once again going to be drama and stupidity to get Inuyasha to do anything normal like invite Sesshoumaru in who hated his guts. If Rin were not here he wouldn’t have to put up with the stupid purifying stench of a half baked barrier Kagome set up. The smell alone of burnt marshmallows was making him want smores and Kagome just wanted to kill him since he was out of carob bars left only with poison chocolate for his Rin he might have to steal.
The King was greeted with the usual insults.
“Bastard, what are you doin’ here? Go away before I throw something at ya and don’t even think of flying up here you wanna be English Kinigit. Your Mother is a bitch and our Father still smells like elderberries thanks to your obsession with plants.”
The King was not insulted.
“Inuyasha, my Mother is a female dog so why the hell are you stating the obvious? It was your human Mother that liked elderberry pie, so blame that on yourself. It is better than the gooseberry you eat although they should be called idiot berries. It would make more sense.’
“Now I have come for my Rin and the Holy Grail. Where is it?”
Inuyasha hated to tell Sesshoumaru that they lost the Grail while playing tackle football with it. Miroku then found it and sold it on e bay. No one knew, but now Inuyasha had to think up something fast.
“Ya, I have it here. I ain’t given it to you. You can go get another one at the English castle across the ocean. Then stay there since you suck like them. You fart in the wind that licks your own but. You anti Buddha worshiping heretic who probably believes in ‘Christianity’ since that is the new fad. Oh, look at Sesshoumaru, the Christian demon dog. Fear my God or I shall smite you. Only a pansy talks like that. Buddha will enlighten your ass and sit on you. Oh smack….I mean snap….”
Miroku high fived Inuyasha for that one.
“Then I must come get them both by force. If you wish to remodel forget it Inuyasha. I will use Bakusaiga and make it impossible for you to reuse these trees forcing you to cut down more of your precious forests although they are mine so you owe me little brother. Perhaps I shall carve into your hide what you owe me so that you do not forget.”
Suddenly a large chair with ‘Lord Inuyasha’ on the back with two pictures of women hanyous worshiping him on the seat was flung over the castle right behind the mighty King. Since it really wasn't a threat or anything he couldn't handle since it was so poorly aimed Sesshoumaru ignored it. Instead it landed on top of Jaken flattening the kappa who was far behind him as usual.
“You will pay for that little brother! My servant is mine to torment.”
Inuyasha looked in panic as more furniture was being flung over the side with the catapult.
“Hey that is my favorite couch woman! That is it, Sesshoumaru I am going to pour porridge on your dumb ass with curry and hot butter if you don’t go away! If I have my way you will keep worshiping Buddah since you are becoming a damn Christian. You should be ashamed of yourself you bastard. I have to deal with my bitch.”
Inuyasha proceeded to pour out a giant cauldron full of curry porridge his wife tried to feed him right into the moat instead of on his brother.
“Damn, now I have to let loose the bears.”
Not even the bears would eat the porridge and ran past Sesshoumaru in fear since he light whipped one in half that dared to try to touch his royal person.
“Look Goldie eyes and the big fluffy I have no time for you. I am having my Pie Kappa Beta Alpha room being destroyed. What! Not my jacket! Give me that wench!”
Inuyasha put on the old leather letterman’s jacket before it too with all his other things was flung out of the castle.
“Inuyasha you have five seconds to produce Rin and my Grail.”
Inuyasha couldn’t believe this. How the hell was he going to explain he didn’t have it? More insults! That would work!
“No way! You suck! I ain't given it too you so fuck off before I insult you some more you Kiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnngggggggggg.”
Kouga came to the top looking down.
“No Inuyasha I think he is going to blow not suck…..”
Inuyasha shoved the wimpy wolf to the side.
“No he probably swallows you stupid wolf……”
Inuyasha stated firmly.
“An English Swallow or African?”
Kouga asked ignoring Sesshoumaru since this stupid conversation had to continue.
“No I mean for real he swallows. I told ya he is gay…….”
Inuyasha stated matter of fact.
“Three…….”
Kouga looked down not believing Inuyasha.
“No he definitely blows mutt face…………see his fluff….he puffs….he fluffs….and he is going to blow….”
With that the castle front exploded.
“And I will cave your castle in.”
Sesshoumaru stated calmly as he strode forward. Rin came running up to her Lord.
“Lord Sesshoumaru! You came for me! I missed you! Did you miss me? We are fixing up this place, but it is so messy and not safe for me. It is not safe for Shippo either so can we have him come with us for a few days?”
Sesshoumaru was used to babysitting and would not corrupt them with the stupidity his brother seemed to instill in young ones.
“Yes he may. Only I can keep you both from going insane and becoming too much of a human since these fools will ruin you both. Now go pack and get the Grail for me like a good pet and all of your chocolate bars.”
Rin looked at the ground sadly.
“Miroku broke the Grail when Kouga and Inuyasha fought over it in the football game. He landed on it after they threw him out of the way saying he was a lousy referee. Then he sold it on that bright light thing that they call a computer to some guy named Bill Gates.”
Sesshoumaru clenched his fists, but then smiled softly patting Rin’s head. She was too sweet and cute to have to deal with these fools.
“Go do as I say and pack little one. I will take care of the problem.”
With that Sesshoumaru huffed, puffed, punched Inuyasha in the nose, threw Kouga into a tree, and swallowed Miroku whole only to throw him back up since the monk didn’t taste like chicken even if he was told humans like everything else tasted as such.
“See Kouga, I told you he swallowed.”
Miroku looked at the other two.
“That just doesn’t fit right……..how come he didn’t run home with his tail between his legs like Goldie Locks would have done? You guys are confusing your fairy tales again.”
Inuyasha shrugged.
“Apparently he is not afraid of his soul being beared to the world although he should be ashamed of himself the fucking hypocrite. YOu can't be a damn Buddist one minute and hold the Holy Grail from the Christians then tell everyone to fuck off. I swear he thinks religion is a joke.'
"I thought he hated humans not ate them. Why can't he act normal and just kill things rather then break everything all the damn time. He is almost as scary as Barney and the Teletubbies.”
Kouga shook his head trying to get that horror out of his head.
“Don’t tell me shit like that you dumb mutt! Are you trying to give me nightmares? If my cubs sing that song to me one more time I am going to cut the cable line no matter how much I love ESPN. Ayame is cruel since she moved back in and you call Kagome a bitch. My cave has white fluffy wolf everything.”
Inuyasha looked at his place. Pink and purple……with left over evil brother hairs.
“Shut up wolf.”
With that they all went into the sunset and Bill Gates still lives in fear that someday the fluff will come for him. And it will, oh yes it will…mwahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaa.
By,
Your Favoritest Writer In The Whole Universe,
Vyperbites
It ain't over even if the fat lady sings so get off her toe ya bastard!
The great King of Japan’s Demons rode his trusty steed into the forests of Inuyasha. It was a ridiculous named place and if they knew the King’s brother they would know why.
“Jaken you can stop with the coconuts already. Ah-Un doesn’t clomp.”
They had been through dangers untold walking past the winding river, through the muddy banks of Moss Hazard County, had eaten wasabi without wincing, and had once used an outhouse. There was nothing the great King couldn’t handle except for the fact he couldn’t scratch his neck on his own in full dog form nor scratch his ears. Jaken sucked at that so they had to find the Holy Grail since Rin took off with it after going over to her Aunt and Uncle’s for a sleepover for a couple of years. Apparantly some human kinigits in England needed the thing for the Crusades as if Buddha couldn’t give them what they wanted the bastard heretics.
As soon as the King arrived at his evil human Stepmother who gave him cookies and was pretty’s old castle that was being remodeled the King just knew that there was going to be a problem. His fluffy would get wet in the moat if his stupid brother didn’t lower the drawbridge. It was once again going to be drama and stupidity to get Inuyasha to do anything normal like invite Sesshoumaru in who hated his guts. If Rin were not here he wouldn’t have to put up with the stupid purifying stench of a half baked barrier Kagome set up. The smell alone of burnt marshmallows was making him want smores and Kagome just wanted to kill him since he was out of carob bars left only with poison chocolate for his Rin he might have to steal.
The King was greeted with the usual insults.
“Bastard, what are you doin’ here? Go away before I throw something at ya and don’t even think of flying up here you wanna be English Kinigit. Your Mother is a bitch and our Father still smells like elderberries thanks to your obsession with plants.”
The King was not insulted.
“Inuyasha, my Mother is a female dog so why the hell are you stating the obvious? It was your human Mother that liked elderberry pie, so blame that on yourself. It is better than the gooseberry you eat although they should be called idiot berries. It would make more sense.’
“Now I have come for my Rin and the Holy Grail. Where is it?”
Inuyasha hated to tell Sesshoumaru that they lost the Grail while playing tackle football with it. Miroku then found it and sold it on e bay. No one knew, but now Inuyasha had to think up something fast.
“Ya, I have it here. I ain’t given it to you. You can go get another one at the English castle across the ocean. Then stay there since you suck like them. You fart in the wind that licks your own but. You anti Buddha worshiping heretic who probably believes in ‘Christianity’ since that is the new fad. Oh, look at Sesshoumaru, the Christian demon dog. Fear my God or I shall smite you. Only a pansy talks like that. Buddha will enlighten your ass and sit on you. Oh smack….I mean snap….”
Miroku high fived Inuyasha for that one.
“Then I must come get them both by force. If you wish to remodel forget it Inuyasha. I will use Bakusaiga and make it impossible for you to reuse these trees forcing you to cut down more of your precious forests although they are mine so you owe me little brother. Perhaps I shall carve into your hide what you owe me so that you do not forget.”
Suddenly a large chair with ‘Lord Inuyasha’ on the back with two pictures of women hanyous worshiping him on the seat was flung over the castle right behind the mighty King. Since it really wasn't a threat or anything he couldn't handle since it was so poorly aimed Sesshoumaru ignored it. Instead it landed on top of Jaken flattening the kappa who was far behind him as usual.
“You will pay for that little brother! My servant is mine to torment.”
Inuyasha looked in panic as more furniture was being flung over the side with the catapult.
“Hey that is my favorite couch woman! That is it, Sesshoumaru I am going to pour porridge on your dumb ass with curry and hot butter if you don’t go away! If I have my way you will keep worshiping Buddah since you are becoming a damn Christian. You should be ashamed of yourself you bastard. I have to deal with my bitch.”
Inuyasha proceeded to pour out a giant cauldron full of curry porridge his wife tried to feed him right into the moat instead of on his brother.
“Damn, now I have to let loose the bears.”
Not even the bears would eat the porridge and ran past Sesshoumaru in fear since he light whipped one in half that dared to try to touch his royal person.
“Look Goldie eyes and the big fluffy I have no time for you. I am having my Pie Kappa Beta Alpha room being destroyed. What! Not my jacket! Give me that wench!”
Inuyasha put on the old leather letterman’s jacket before it too with all his other things was flung out of the castle.
“Inuyasha you have five seconds to produce Rin and my Grail.”
Inuyasha couldn’t believe this. How the hell was he going to explain he didn’t have it? More insults! That would work!
“No way! You suck! I ain't given it too you so fuck off before I insult you some more you Kiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnngggggggggg.”
Kouga came to the top looking down.
“No Inuyasha I think he is going to blow not suck…..”
Inuyasha shoved the wimpy wolf to the side.
“No he probably swallows you stupid wolf……”
Inuyasha stated firmly.
“An English Swallow or African?”
Kouga asked ignoring Sesshoumaru since this stupid conversation had to continue.
“No I mean for real he swallows. I told ya he is gay…….”
Inuyasha stated matter of fact.
“Three…….”
Kouga looked down not believing Inuyasha.
“No he definitely blows mutt face…………see his fluff….he puffs….he fluffs….and he is going to blow….”
With that the castle front exploded.
“And I will cave your castle in.”
Sesshoumaru stated calmly as he strode forward. Rin came running up to her Lord.
“Lord Sesshoumaru! You came for me! I missed you! Did you miss me? We are fixing up this place, but it is so messy and not safe for me. It is not safe for Shippo either so can we have him come with us for a few days?”
Sesshoumaru was used to babysitting and would not corrupt them with the stupidity his brother seemed to instill in young ones.
“Yes he may. Only I can keep you both from going insane and becoming too much of a human since these fools will ruin you both. Now go pack and get the Grail for me like a good pet and all of your chocolate bars.”
Rin looked at the ground sadly.
“Miroku broke the Grail when Kouga and Inuyasha fought over it in the football game. He landed on it after they threw him out of the way saying he was a lousy referee. Then he sold it on that bright light thing that they call a computer to some guy named Bill Gates.”
Sesshoumaru clenched his fists, but then smiled softly patting Rin’s head. She was too sweet and cute to have to deal with these fools.
“Go do as I say and pack little one. I will take care of the problem.”
With that Sesshoumaru huffed, puffed, punched Inuyasha in the nose, threw Kouga into a tree, and swallowed Miroku whole only to throw him back up since the monk didn’t taste like chicken even if he was told humans like everything else tasted as such.
“See Kouga, I told you he swallowed.”
Miroku looked at the other two.
“That just doesn’t fit right……..how come he didn’t run home with his tail between his legs like Goldie Locks would have done? You guys are confusing your fairy tales again.”
Inuyasha shrugged.
“Apparently he is not afraid of his soul being beared to the world although he should be ashamed of himself the fucking hypocrite. YOu can't be a damn Buddist one minute and hold the Holy Grail from the Christians then tell everyone to fuck off. I swear he thinks religion is a joke.'
"I thought he hated humans not ate them. Why can't he act normal and just kill things rather then break everything all the damn time. He is almost as scary as Barney and the Teletubbies.”
Kouga shook his head trying to get that horror out of his head.
“Don’t tell me shit like that you dumb mutt! Are you trying to give me nightmares? If my cubs sing that song to me one more time I am going to cut the cable line no matter how much I love ESPN. Ayame is cruel since she moved back in and you call Kagome a bitch. My cave has white fluffy wolf everything.”
Inuyasha looked at his place. Pink and purple……with left over evil brother hairs.
“Shut up wolf.”
With that they all went into the sunset and Bill Gates still lives in fear that someday the fluff will come for him. And it will, oh yes it will…mwahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaa.
By,
Your Favoritest Writer In The Whole Universe,
Vyperbites
It ain't over even if the fat lady sings so get off her toe ya bastard!