Gothic Love

This chapter will be in Kagome's mind between her and Midoriko as well as her memories of the past and will be split into two chapters.





Chapter 7: Her Sanity's Slipping Away (Part 1)





Kagome turning teary eyes on Midoriko and simply stared at her. Though tears stilll flowed from her eyes they were empty lifeless windows to her dying soul. Midoriko watched her with sad eyes and prayed that the tortured and pained woman before her would one day find peace with her past.



"Kagome?"



Dead eyes turned to her but Kagome said nothing.



"Kagome you must stop this your going to destroy yourself. You have people that love you, why do you dwell on the past?"



"Because the past holds my lifes essence not the present."



Midoriko was at a loss as to how to help her. Her voice was as empty and lifeless as her eyes and yet she could feel her clinging to something deep within her.



"Let go of the past Kagome and live for the future."



"There is no future for me, only my pain and my past."



"Is it Lee and your son that you cling to within or your brother Ton? Maybe even your parents that disowned you after they found out about your son little Lee?"



"Only Lee, my son, and Ton mean something to me anymore. If I could have them back..."



A sob caught in Kagome's throat and she stopped talking.



"We can not return them to you Kagome you know that."



Anger seeped into Kagome and melded with her pain and heart break.



"You could return them to me but the purity of the jewel is all that matters to you and saving those not meant to die. Yet, how does the jewel remain pure if I despise it for never giving me anything back for all my years of protection and guardianship?"



Midoriko gazed at her with sad eyes, she understood Kagome's pain because it had been her pain before it became Kagome's. Sitting beside Kagome Midoriko pulled her close and simply held her as she cried harder.



"We the jewel need you Kagome, without you we will become creatures of darkness and we were never meant for that. You are to be our guardian for the rest of time. But your words are right. I will see if we my give you back what was taken so long ago."



Midoriko disappeared from the white void leaving Kagome to cry out some of the grief she had carried for so long.



~Flashback~



Kagome looked up with fear in her eyes as she watched the large claws coming down upon her. Fear held her in place, but the love of her life and soon to be mate pushed her out of the way and in the process was wounded and lay unmoving on the ground. Kagome stood and slowly started toward him unseeing of everything else until she heard the pained cry of her ward behind her. She acted without thought as she turned and ran to him and continued running as she carried him back to the castle away from the battle. She returned after making sure he was safe and looked for her love, but found only a puddle of blood were his body had once lay. Her hands touched his blood and she found it was no longer warm but chilled and cold to the touch. Her hands covered in his blood went to her slightly protruding stomach. A terrible scream left her throat and all knew that her love Lee was gone from this world and she was now alone. She only remembered screaming his name in grief before her world went black. When she woke up she was in a soft bed and Sesshomaru, Inuyasha and Inutaisho were beside her. Inutaisho's eyes were sad, while Inuyasha seemed to radiate happiness, and Sesshomaru worry.



"You okay Kagome we were so worried."



Inuyasha's small voice piped up as he smiled at her.



"I wasn't worried I knew you would be okay because father said so."



Sesshomaru said in a quiet voice, though his eyes betrayed his worry for her health and safety. He had heard her anguished cry as had everyone else within in the castle grounds. Inutaisho had forbade him or Inuyasha to leave their rooms until he said it was okay and then he had left to retrieve her from the field, himself. He had found her laying in the blood of her would be mate unconscious and his heart really went out to the girl for having to deal with so much pain at such a young age.



"I'm fine, thank you for worrying about me."



The words were said with a happiness that Kagome neither felt nor remembered ever feeling.



"Leave us Sesshomaru Inuyasha I must speak with Kagome privately."



Both noded and left and the forced smile finally fell from Kagome's face as she curled up and sobbed brokenly, her arms wrapped around her protruding stomach that held the only piece of her love she had left. Inutaisho rubbed her side and tried to comfort her but couldn't see how anything would ever take away the pain she felt and knew that in the end she would feel this pain for the rest of her life.



"You are aware of the pup within you and I regret to inform you that your parents are as well and have disowned you. As such you may live here as a part of my pack...I am truly sorry for your loss Kagome."



~Skip Forward Three Months~



"FATHER COME QUICKLY KAGOME'S GOING TO HAVE HER PUP!"



Inuyasha ran through the palace hallways screaming at the top of his lungs as Sesshomaru ran with Kagome in his arms to the birthing quarters that had been set up for her already. He was met there by the healer and the midwives who took Kagome to birth her pup. Inutaisho with Inuyasha tucked under his arm appeared seconds later and started to pace while Sesshomaru sat quietly to wait with Inuyasha crying at his side as the first of Kagome's pained screams echoed through the hall. Several hours later they were allowed in to see her and the pup. Kagome was sitting up slightly and smiling at the small bundle in her arms.



"His names Lee like his father."



A single tear slid down her cheek as she smiled sadly at her son who watched her with the same eyes her love had once stared at her with. Inutaisho wiped the tear away and smiled.



"I'm sure he's very proud of you and his son Kagome rest now we will see you later."



Kagome nodded and closed her tired eyes her son held tightly to her body as he to slept.



~Three Years Later~



"Sesshomaru watch him okay don't run to far ahead."



Sesshomaru nodded and he, Inuyasha and little Lee disappeared into the trees playing a game of tag to help Lee develop his hunting and tracking skills. Kagome sat with her back against a Sakura tree resting after having to protect them from a pack of wild boars. She smiled as she felt them running through the trees. Pulling back her energy she decided to let them play for once. She closed her eyes and began to meditiate a small smile gracing her face.



"KAGOME KAGOME KAGOME!"



Her eyes snapped open as Inuyasha came running toward her tears flowing from his eyes. Sesshomaru was right behind him holding a bundle in his arms. Kagome noticed it was wrapped in his outer hoari and that Lee was nowhere in sight and then she smelt it...Lee's blood. Sesshomaru sat the little bundle down before her then with a speed she didn't relize he possessed grabbed Inuyasha and jumped back to give her space. Openning the bundle with trembling hands she forgot to breath when she saw the bloodied and maimed body of her little boy. His sweet little face burned beyond recognition and his hair appearing to have been ripped out in places.



"Lee...Lee, my sweet little boy...Oh Kami, no LEE."



"He was killed by a houshi. I tried to get to him in time but..."



Sesshomaru's voice broke and he stopped speaking for fear of releasing the tears threatening to fall for the little boy he had seen as another little brother and a part of his pack. Inuyasha buried his face in Sesshomaru's chest not knowing what else to do as he cried and sought some sort of comfort from his older brother. Sesshomaru wrapped an arm about him but spoke no reassuring words because he needed to hear them himself yet knew there were none. When they returned to the castle finally it was because Inutaisho had grown worried and had come looking for them only to see a broken woman holding her sons body and two boys trying to cope with the death of a friend. The scene had hurt him deeply and it was with a heavy heart that they all returned to the castle after burying little Lee's body next to the grave of Ton Kagome's fallen brother.



~End Flashback~



"Kagome..."



Kagome's lifeless eyes looked up at Midoriko without any recognition in them.



"Kagome I'm so sorry we can not bring them back the Kami's won't permit it and if you wish for it anyway the jewel won't respond...I'm so sorry."



Midoriko saw Kagome as if she was standing on the edge of a cliff and she prayed she just hadn't pushed her over the edge.