Pack of the West

Chapter 7: Confusing Emotions

“Inuyasha, we have to get Miroku back,” Kagome stated firmly.

“He was the one that wanted to chase after Sesshoumaru, let him go.” Inuyasha was upset that his friend had basically abandoned their group and quest in favour of Sesshoumaru’s kid. He was also very surprised that Miroku wasn’t back with his tail between his legs as he was certain his assassin brother would not have tolerated him around.

Inuyasha had finally gone out into the forest, without the girl’s knowledge, and tracked Miroku when he hadn’t been back within a few days, worried that maybe Sesshoumaru had killed him after all. He had found him still with his brother and basically unhurt except for a fading bruise on his cheek. He was amazed that Sesshoumaru allowed him there, he even saw Miroku holding the pup with Sesshoumaru’s blessings it seemed.

“Inuyasha…” Kagome warned in a dangerous tone of voice.

The hanyou looked at her, sticking his chin out in challenge. “He’s made his decision, we should leave him be, if he wants to come back he will.”

Inuyasha was tired of fighting about it and just wanted to carry on, they couldn’t chase after Miroku forever. They had shards to find and Naraku to defeat. Inuyasha hoped that Miroku knew what he was doing as he stalked away from Kagome and Sango. “Come or stay, I’m going to find Naraku,” he told them.

The girls and Shippou sadly followed after the hanyou, hoping they would see Miroku again.

<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>

The days went by for the strange group in the west and they fell into a simple routine. Miroku would care for the kids and help Jaken cook and set up their camps, Sesshoumaru hunting for food and providing protection by token of his very presence.

Many who saw them could not believe what they were seeing; a demon lord followed by a human child, a monk carrying an infant and an imp. They were quite the procession and as more demons heard of them, they plotted to gain Sesshoumaru’s lands and power. Thinking he would be an easy target with this weak group; they grew bolder.

Miroku, Rin and Yumi were in the hot springs that Sesshoumaru had taken them to when Miroku informed the demon lord that they needed to be cleaned of the dust from the road. He was currently holding Yumi as she played in the water, splashing her hands and laughing as Rin swam under the water and then popped up right in front of her.

Miroku had been feeling down for awhile, he missed his friends and had given up trying to draw the overly quiet and depressing demon into any type of conversation.

I’ve heard of tight lipped but he takes the cake, Miroku had bemoaned to himself. Still, he had been very respectful of Sesshoumaru, not wanting a repeat of being slapped or maybe worse, but he was lonely.

Sesshoumaru basically ignored the human monk’s very presence and it made Miroku feel like he was invisible. The monk loved Rin now as much as Yumi and the two kids made the long days worthwhile. He was starting to figure out Sesshoumaru’s moods and it would have surprised everyone that he was beginning to know the stoic lord better than even his long time retainer. He knew that Sesshoumaru kept a tight rein on his emotions and he deduced it must have been because of some happening in his past that had made him close himself off from others for his own protection. Occasionally, though, he was rewarded with snips and snaps of seeing the seemingly unfeeling demon with his guard down.

He was thinking of one of those times when the three demons approached unnoticed.

He was remembering two days ago when he had woken because Yumi had not been by his side. He opened his eyes slowly and with his monks training, kept his breathing regular and his heart beat slow, to see Sesshoumaru holding the sleeping infant with a beautiful, genuine smile of his face.

Miroku saw the absolute love in the demon lord’s eyes as he had gazed at her and since then the monk never had a worry about her being with her father. He also remembered how beautiful he thought Sesshoumaru was at that time and wished he could be closer to him. He surprised himself by this because he had never thought of any man as truly beautiful. I must be lonelier than I believe, he had thought with a shake of his head.

While Miroku was thinking about this, he did not have his full attention on the three demonic aura’s that were congregating on him so was completely taken off guard when two of them jumped out from behind the bushes intent on grabbing the children.

He reacted quickly, tightening his hold on Yumi and yelling for Rin to run. Rin almost made it when one of the demons grabbed her as she was just getting out of the water.

Miroku, holding Yumi in one arm and his staff in the other, swung it down hard on the demons arm that was holding Rin, breaking it. He knew this wouldn’t last long as he could see the bone that had been sticking out at an odd angel, begin to right itself right before his eyes, but at least he had made the now howling demon let go of the little girl.

He pushed Yumi into Rin’s hands and told her to run back and get help. He stood between her and the demons as she made her escape.

The demon was furious that this human had thwarted his plan to grab the brats and trade them for Sesshoumaru’s land, making himself lord. He grabbed at Miroku who quickly jumped to the side to be almost decapitated by the one eyed demon which had swung a very sharp, curved sword. He ducked spinning his staff, connecting with the one eyed demons temple making him crash to the ground dead.

He then turned on the first demon trying not to allow him to get past. He swung his staff with one hand while the other was reaching into his robes for his sutras. The demon leapt back, Miroku following, getting ready to throw the charmed papers, not realizing he was entering a trap until it was too late.

The third demon that had still been hiding in the bushes came leaping out slashing with his large talons. They connected, raking deeply across Miroku’s bare chest causing a huge gush of blood to spurt into the air. Miroku hit the ground hard, his head swimming; the pain in his chest almost unbearable. That’s when he saw Sesshoumaru, flying through the air like an avenging angel, power flowing out of his demonic sword, cutting the two remaining demons into bits of dust.

Satisfied that the threat was now taken care of, Sesshoumaru knelt down beside Miroku to look at his wounds.

Miroku saw the slightest widening of the demon’s golden eyes. “That good, huh?” he groaned

He tried to laugh, but started coughing which just aggravated the pain in his chest. Moaning, he looked up to Sesshoumaru’s normally unfathomable eyes, which now had the tiniest hint of worry in them. “I would rather not die if you could do something about it,” Miroku managed to wheeze out as his vision began to waver.

Sesshoumaru couldn’t believe the human was still alive. The wounds were deep, nasty and he had lost a lot of blood. When the human told the demon that he didn’t want to die, something inside Sesshoumaru told him he didn’t want the monk to die either. He lifted the injured human towards him gently, leaning forward and drawing his tongue against the wounds causing Miroku to squirm.

“What are you doing?” Miroku gasped, Sesshoumaru’s tongue was making the wounds sting even more and he groaned out his question painfully, trying to get away.

“Be still,” commanded Sesshoumaru as he let his saliva become slightly acidic to cauterize the wounds. He lapped up all the blood from the gashes noting that Miroku tasted very nice, sweet and salty at the same time.

Miroku was starting to black out from loss of blood and Sesshoumaru bit into his own wrist holding it to Miroku’s mouth. “Drink this now,” he ordered in a strong voice.

Miroku began to gently lick the blood offered and a bolt of energy went through his body. He grabbed the proffered arm with his hand and began to suck forcefully, trying to pull the spicy elixir into his body as he heard Sesshoumaru hiss.

Sesshoumaru felt the pulling sensation as the monk tried to suck him dry of his life’s blood and sucked a lungful of air into his chest at the slightly painful sensation. He did not remove his arm, knowing that if Miroku didn’t gain the energy of his blood he would most likely die.

Now when did I start thinking of him as Miroku? I could just bring him back with Tenseiga, why do I want to honor his wish not to die? He pondered this for a moment or two until he started to feel a bit light headed. He finally pulled his arm away from Miroku, waiting until he saw that the wounds were slowly closing, his demon healing ability passed on to Miroku though his blood. The demon lord knew scars would always remain, but he somehow doubted that the monk would mind. Sesshoumaru lowered the human to the ground looking for his clothing. Spotting them, he stood and retrieved them, passing them to Miroku as he lay there trying to get a grip on the world that was spinning around him.

“Get dressed, we are leaving,” Sesshoumaru stated flatly and then turned to walk back to the camp, wanting to check on the two girls he had left with Jaken.

Miroku was feeling quite high, the blood running through him making him feel powerful and strong, like he could do anything in the world. He dressed, his hands quaking slightly from the adrenaline pounding though his system, trying to control his pounding heart. Why did he do that? He saved me and I’m sure I saw concern in his eyes.

Miroku had gotten very good at reading Sesshoumaru’s smallest body movements and eye signals and knew he wasn’t wrong. Could he like me a little bit after all? That thought made Miroku feel a bit less lonely and a little giddy.

<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>

A few evenings later Miroku went off by himself. He was sitting on a log looking out over a meadow watching fireflies flit and blink amongst the tall grass feeling slightly depressed. He had hoped that maybe Sesshoumaru would talk to him more or treat him like he actually existed, but nothing had really changed. In fact it seemed like the demon lord was actually avoiding him more than usual. He sighed wondering what his friends were doing now, missing their easy banter and teasing. He reached up with the sleeve of his robe and wiped a small tear that had appeared in the corner of his eye.

Sesshoumaru was watching from the shadows as Miroku sat on the log and sighed. He could feel depression and loneliness coming from the human and it was really bothering his more primal and demonic side.

His confused youkai had decided that Miroku was his mate. They had exchanged blood. Miroku was doing all the things a mate would do, care for his children, preparing and serving his meals. Sesshoumaru was acting as the alpha, bringing home the food and protecting him and the children, just exactly as things should be as far as his demonic instincts were concerned.

This was playing havoc with Sesshoumaru’s emotions as at times he wanted to hold Miroku and kiss him or make love to him as a good mate should. He held himself in check and even tried to stay away from the dark haired monk in the hopes that these feelings would go away. They only intensified the more he tried to avoid the situation and when he smelt the salty scent of tears he couldn’t handle it any longer.

Miroku jumped when Sesshoumaru stood before him, seeming to just appear out of no where. “Have I treated you unfairly?” the demon asked, looking down on the miserably sad human.

“No, my lord, you haven’t treated my like anything,” Miroku replied respectfully and truthfully.

Sesshoumaru knew this was true, he hadn’t even acknowledged him as much as he did Jaken and that was saying something. His demon instincts were berating him for making his mate feel so poorly and unwanted.

Miroku looked out towards the meadow again ignoring Sesshoumaru who he figured was just going to walk off anyways. He was totally surprised when the western lord sat down beside him and joined him in looking out over the meadow. Miroku slid a glance in his direction after a few moments of silence and saw Sesshoumaru had turned to face him.

Sesshoumaru reached out and gently touched the side of his face, putting his hand under Miroku’s chin and turning his head to face him.

Miroku was shocked to say the least. Sesshoumaru was being so gentle and had a tender look in his eyes. What’s he doing? Miroku was totally confused but he held his breath not wanting this contact to end.

Sesshoumaru leaned in and gently and chastely kissed Miroku’s lips marvelling at the softness and sweetness of them.

Miroku feeling lonely; was so happy that he wasn’t being ignored for a change, began to kiss back just as gently, closing his eyes and sighing.

They both broke apart slowly amazed at the range of varying emotions flowing through them.

Miroku, who always chased women, had just gotten the best kiss of his life from a man. Not only that but he wanted more of this demon, and wasn’t ashamed to admit it to himself. He surprised himself at the depth of feelings he had for the white haired demon. He truly liked him and wanted Sesshoumaru to like him back.

Sesshoumaru just felt totally complete, as if this was the person he was meant to be with. That small amount of contact caused the heavy stone of loneliness inside him disappear, a feeling the dog demon had gotten used to over the centuries. He could have cared less if Miroku was a man. He already had two heirs to his lands so more children was not an issue.

“You are not alone, Miroku,” Sesshoumaru said quietly, looking out over the meadow again.

Miroku noticed that Sesshoumaru had called him by name, the first time the demon lord had done so since he had followed after the tall demon. He didn’t know what to say so just sat, stunned, looking off into the distance.

“You may leave if you wish,” Sesshoumaru offered, wondering if maybe he had done the wrong thing here. “You can go back to your friends”

“You want me to leave?” Miroku asked, worried that he had just misread everything and that Sesshoumaru was going to send him packing.

“No.”

Miroku pondered that small answer. “I want to stay. My friends can do just as well without me.”

“I doubt that, but as you wish.” Sesshoumaru was trying very hard to get himself back under control so he wouldn’t jump the boy right here. He was glad Miroku wanted to stay but he had to know one more thing. “Do you stay to be with me or with Yumi?” He was very concerned as to what the answer to this question would be.

“Both,” replied Miroku honestly.

Sesshoumaru was satisfied with that answer and leaned in and gave Miroku another small kiss. He wanted so much to throw him to the grass and just take him, but held himself back. Rising from the log, he looked at Miroku waiting for him to rise and follow him back towards camp. Sesshoumaru did not want to rush into anything blind; he had to make sure he would not get hurt, again.