Chapter Four – Tested [Part Two]
There were moments in Kagome's life where she marveled at the graciousness of the kami, and seated on comfortable cushions beneath a vine covered pavilion, she readily logged this portion of her day as one of them. Rin's smiling face was comforting, not because she hadn't been smiled at, but because she was human; there were no markings, no fangs, and no pointed ears, and so their light conversation felt normal. "How do you do it, Rin?" Kagome asked in wonderment. "Dealing with youkai all the time, I mean," she explained at the curious look the young woman gave her. Rin's smile was bright, if not a little wry. "I think I've just gotten used to it," she responded, taking a sip of the tea in front of her. "I've been with Lord Sesshomaru for so long that this life is normal to me." She shrugged. "I don't think much of it." Kagome shifted, tucking her legs to the side and leaning on her hand. "What was it like, growing up here?" Rin smiled gently, forsaking her tea for a more comfortable position, leaning back on her hands and crossing her legs at the ankles, bare toes wriggling in the warm air. "It was actually fairly easy, but I think it was only that way because Lord Sesshomaru protected me." "Protected you?" "He demanded that I was to be treated with the utmost respect," the young woman elaborated, a small smile playing across her lips. "And he assured everyone that if anyone disobeyed him, then they would be killed immediately." Kagome felt shock ripple through her body, leaving a cold, trembling sensation in its wake. "Killed?" she repeated, unable to help the scowl she could feel creasing her brow. Rin nodded, her smile fading as she cocked her head to one side, brown hair sliding along her cheek. She made no move to brush it away, instead fixing Kagome with an expression that reminded her strongly of the one Kotono had given her the night before; a searching, lightly questioning look. "You don't think it was right," she finally stated. Shaking her head, Kagome looked out over the smoothly paved area outside of the pavilion as a small bird alighted gracefully in the center. For a moment, she said nothing, watching as the bird let out a trilling call before taking off once more. "He didn't actually kill anyone, did he?" Her eyes slid back to Rin and the young woman shrugged. "If he did, he never told me and I never found out." She paused, giving Kagome that look again. "If he had, would you leave?" The question was, Kagome quickly realized, a double edged sword. If she said yes, she would be running away from what she'd promised herself she wouldn't run away from, and if she said no then she would be accepting the fact that the Western Lord might've murdered his own staff. "I...don't know," she responded at last, frowning. Rin made a noise in the back of her throat, and Kagome got the distinct feeling that she was filing the answer away for later. A little unnerved at what that could mean—would she tell Lord Sesshomaru?—the miko shifted once more, taking the strain off of her wrist for a moment. "Kagome," Rin murmured, brown eyes gentle, "please don't take this the wrong way, but what are you doing here?" It was different than when Kotono had asked her that very same question just days before. Something in Rin's tone, something in the way she tilted her head, gave away the fact that she wasn't asking about Kagome's physical presence. Nervously, Kagome licked her lips. "I..." She swallowed around the lump in her throat, opened her mouth, and found she couldn't speak. She cleared her throat and tried again. "I just want to...be accepted." "Accepted?" Kagome nodded, nibbling on her bottom lip as she ordered her thoughts. "Just for once, I want to be..." she faltered, struggling to find the right word. "Recognized?" Rin offered softly. Kagome nodded. "Recognized." "For what?" The question opened a wound Kagome thought had long since scabbed over, and the dull ache of insults long gone began to pulse in her chest. She swallowed, turned her face away from Rin's searching gaze, and whispered, "For me." For a while, the only sounds that found their way to her ears were the cheerful chirp of birds and the soft gust of the wind through the trees, and then Rin spoke, her voice gentle. "I hope my lord chooses you," she stated. Kagome's head snapped up so quickly that she felt the muscles in her neck protest with the movement. Ignoring the sting, she blinked and licked her lips. "Y-you do?" Rin nodded, reaching to grasp the tea cup she'd been neglecting. "Of course," she responded, eyes sparkling over the rim of her cup. "I like you." Unsure of how to respond to the statement—and positive that she'd done nothing to deserve it—Kagome picked up her own cup of tea and took a sip, grateful for the distraction. She looked back out over the grounds and saw Kotono's familiar figure approaching. A servant walked behind her, and the dragoness smiled as she neared. "Rin, you'll be late for your lessons if you're not careful." "Is it time already?" Rin pouted, climbing to her feet and glancing up at the sky. Kagome stood as well, joining Kotono at the dragoness' motioning and watching as Rin murmured to herself, gathering the tea supplies and handing them to the servant, who bowed and began to make her way back toward the shiro. Rin made to follow, and then stopped and turned, engulfing Kagome in a warm hug. Though the contact was highly unexpected, Kagome managed to get over her shock quickly enough to hear the words whispered into her ear. "Good luck, Kagome." "T-thank you, Rin," the miko spluttered as the young woman pulled away. Rin stepped closer to Kotono, and the dragoness folded her into her arms, planting a friendly kiss on her temple before shooing her away. With a smile and a wave, Rin, bare feet, bright smile and all, walked away. It was only when she was out of sight that Kotono inhaled deeply, the sound she made as she exhaled giving away the fact that she'd only been enjoying the fresh air and not sighing out of relief. Her bright green eyes landed on Kagome's face and her lips quirked upward. "Very well done, Kagome." Kagome blinked in confusion, forcing her legs to work as Kotono began to walk away. "What?" "She likes you," the youkai explained, clasping her hands in front of her as she walked. "I was simply congratulating you; Rin doesn't like many." "She doesn't seem like the kind to not like anyone," Kagome muttered, looking up just in time to see Kotono's shrug. "She's grown up in a youkai court; it's easy for her to pretend when she needs to." The sentence made Kagome's stomach churn nervously. 'If Rin can pretend, then does that mean that...that Kotono is pretending now?' She glanced up, unable to help herself, and took in the calm, beautiful profile of the demoness. 'What if she's been pretending the entire time?' Suddenly, Kotono stopped and looked down at her. "You doubt me," she stated. Kagome opened her mouth, maybe to protest, maybe to defend herself, but before she could get the words out, Kotono shook her head. "You have good reason," she said, "considering what I've just told you." She resumed walking, and Kagome swallowed nervously. "I-I'm sorry," she whispered, hanging her head. Kotono slowed to a stop again, and when Kagome didn't look up—how could she when she'd just insulted the woman who'd essentially taken her in?—the dragoness clicked her tongue and slipped her hand beneath her chin, manually lifting her head. "I'm not angry with you, little one, not at all." "But I—" "Have done nothing to earn my wrath," the demoness interrupted, the words holding a light playfulness. "You reacted the way I expected you to react." Kagome nibbled her bottom lip, and Kotono's fingers slipped upward until the entirety of her hand rested on her cheek. "Ah, Kagome...such a fragile little thing you are." Kagome felt her cheeks heat up, and her embarrassment only intensified when Kotono chuckled before dropping her hand and continuing toward the shiro. Figuring that the topic their previous conversation was null and void, Kagome walked silently, observing the pine trees and absorbing the semi-familiar surroundings as they stepped onto the grounds once more. 'I've been gone most of the day,' Kagome realized with a start. 'I didn't even notice the time going by.' As if cognizant of her new time awareness, her stomach grumbled loudly, prompting her youkai companion to chuckle quietly, though she said nothing until they reached her building. Opening the door and allowing her to enter first, Kotono ushered her to the receiving room, where a servant was setting down a wooden tray. The dragoness murmured something to the servant as she passed, and then motioned for Kagome to sit, which she did quickly. "I guessed that you might be hungry," the lady said as she settled gracefully across from her. "I hope you don't mind the smaller portion." "Oh no, not at all." Kotono served her a small bowl of rice and a cup of cool green tea, and they ate silently until a knock on the door pulled them away from their meal; Kotono stood and spoke quietly with the servant, taking a wrapped package and closing the door before coming back to her seat. "What's that?" Kagome asked, unable to hide her curiosity. Kotono smiled. "If you're finished, I'll show you." Kagome nodded vigorously, and they walked further into the building, going into the room Kagome slept in—she refused to think of it as her room just yet—and Kotono knelt in the center of the tatami, motioning for Kagome to join her. Kneeling across from the dragoness, Kagome tried not to fidget. Wasting no time, Kotono slipped a delicately curved claw beneath the twine that held the brown packaging together, snapping it easily before reaching to unwrap what Kagome was beginning to believe was a garment of some sort. Hands poised over the brown wrapping, Kotono stopped, and then sat back. "You open it," she suggested, eyes twinkling. Kagome thought about it for all of two seconds, and then nodded and reached forward, separating the thin paper. Slowly, she pulled the contents of the package up and out, feeling her mouth drop open at the sight of yards and yards of pure white silk, embroidered with a deep blue leaf and branch design. "Do you like it?" Kotono asked, reaching to help her extract the entire kimono from the paper. "Yes," Kagome whispered, surprised. "Did you...?" The dragoness nodded. "I asked my seamstress to make it for you." "You shouldn't ha—" "Hush, little one," Kotono interrupted, smiling gently. "It is of little consequence." She showed Kagome a deep blue obi, geta sandals, tabi socks, and small but beautiful hair ornaments before continuing. "Besides, you will be having supper with Lord Sesshomaru tonight." This was a new development, and Kagome tried not to groan. "You're trying to get me sent home," she grumbled knowing the dragoness wouldn't take it the wrong way and earning herself an amused chuckle. "Nonsense. Your previous meetings with my lord have not been enough to send you home." "Oh? And what makes you so sure of that?" Kotono gave a one shouldered shrug, standing and pulling Kagome up with her. "My lord has never had a human," she responded. Kagome felt her cheeks redden at the lady's forwardness, but Kotono either ignored her embarrassment or didn't notice it. "And you intrigue him." "But that doesn't mean he'll choose me," Kagome pointed out, allowing the dragoness to take the new kimono. Kotono walked across the room, carefully draping the kimono over a low table and walking back toward her, a small smile playing across her lips. "That may be true," she answered, "but you do not know him as well as I, correct?" Kagome pursed her lips, turning at her companion's urging and instinctively holding her kimono shut as Kotono removed her obi. "Yes, but..." She trailed off, releasing her kimono to take the light bathing yukata that Kotono held out to her. "You worry too much, little miko," the lady murmured, eyes twinkling with the veiled amusement Kagome could hear in her voice. The human shrugged helplessly, absently changing into the yukata. "I can't help it." Kotono hummed in the back of her throat, placing a clawed hand on Kagome's shoulder before nudging her out of the building and toward the bathhouse. "It is not a bad quality to portray, since it shows a fair amount of forethought," she said after a while, "but the things you choose to worry about are sometimes trivial." Kagome opened her mouth, but Kotono tsk-ed, not resuming until they were entering the bathhouse. "Not that this matter is trivial, mind you, but do you remember dining with the other candidates last night?" Kagome scowled. "Okay so I'd worried a bit then," she conceded, "but it was because I didn't know that you would be there." Kotono shrugged, the motion conveying an 'it doesn't matter' feel. "Either way," she answered, "whether I was there or not, you shouldn't have worried over a simple dinner." Kagome sighed, knowing that the demoness was right. The dinner hadn't been bad in the least; in fact, with the more hostile of the candidates gone, it could've even been categorized as pleasant since conversation had been light and tempers hadn't flared. 'Alright, so I worry a little too much,' she groused, stripping the yukata away from her skin and walking into the springs, closing the shoji screen behind her. 'But I really can't help it!' Suddenly, another thought struck her. 'What if my worrying makes Lord Sesshomaru send me home? I don't think he's the type to appreciate a worrier...' "And now you are worrying about worrying," Kotono called through the shoji, her voice giving away her amusement. Kagome, surprised, laughed, the sound muffled by the thick steam that rose up around her face as she carefully stepped into the hot springs and then sank in up to her shoulders, the water blissfully hot. She sat for a moment, and then looked at Kotono's silhouette. "Kotono?" "Yes?" "What you said earlier, about Rin pretending..." She trailed off, a thought impeding her voice. 'What if I offend her like I did earlier?' "Yes?" Kagome let out a light sigh. "Will I have to learn how to pretend if Lord Sesshomaru chooses me?" It wasn't the question she'd wanted to ask, and she had a feeling that Kotono knew that she'd changed her mind; her response was slow, careful. "Yes, you will have to learn." She paused. "Why do you ask?" "I just...I don't like pretending to be someone I'm not," she answered, looking down into the water. She twirled her thumbs around and around each other, the repetitive motion helping to soothe her lightly frazzled mind. Kotono was silent for a moment. "There are those who will take advantage of your kind nature," she said at last. Kagome reached for the shallow dish of soap beside her right shoulder, dipping her fingers into the slick substance and lathering it between her hands. "So I'll have to pretend to protect myself?" "Yes." Kotono's shadow shifted. "Especially since my lord's disdain of humanity is well-known; it will be a shock to youkai if he chooses to have the very thing he despises so greatly." Kagome pulled her bottom lip between her teeth as she bathed, a small voice in the back of her mind berating her for her choice. 'You couldn't take being by yourself for the rest of your life,' it mocked, 'so you decided to come and make things complicated for a being that shouldn't have any problems at all! How very selfish of you, Kagome.' "Kagome?" Shaking her head, she rinsed and reached once more for the soap. "Hmm?" "My lord will not make a decision without weighing all of his options. Rest assured; whatever he decides, it will put no strain on him." The words comforted her, and Kagome took a deep breath, lifting her hands to wash her hair. "I still don't like to pretend," she called before ducking under the water. When she surfaced, Kotono responded, "Worry not; I will protect you from the worst of it." Kagome hummed, and then sighed, leaned back, and closed her eyes. When she opened them what felt like minutes later, it was to the feel of a hand on her shoulder, shaking her gently while a familiar voice called her name. "Kagome, wake up. We've got to get you dressed." Blearily, she blinked up at Kotono's smiling face, and as the sleepy fog in her mind softened to nothing, she found her voice. "How long have I been asleep?" Kotono nudged her shoulder, and she stood, stepping out into the drying cloth the dragoness was holding for her. "A little over an hour," she answered, leading her from the springs and into the dressing room. Too relaxed to care, Kagome allowed the youkai to dry her back and arms, taking the cloth to finish before wrapping herself in a thin inner kimono and following Kotono back toward her building. Once back in the room, Kotono motioned for her to sit at the vanity, and then began pulling and tugging at her damp hair, using a sapphire studded ivory comb to separate the tangles. Kagome watched her work for a moment, and then the dragoness looked at her in the mirror, a teasing smile tugging at her lips. "Your little nap in the springs cost me precious time," she said, the tone of her voice bordering on petulant. "So I'll have to dry your hair." She tilted her head to one side, eyes sparkling. "I won't burn you...just sit still." Kagome opened her mouth, a little alarmed at the nearly wicked gleam that entered the dragoness' eyes, but before she could ask what she meant, heat undulated against the back of her neck, and the lady began to run her fingers through her hair. Surprised, Kagome watched as the dampened locks dried instantly, falling against her back in slightly warmed tendrils of wavy ebony. It took no time at all for the entirety of her hair to be as though it hadn't been wet just moments before, and the warmth languidly caressing her skin ebbed and then disappeared altogether. "W-what did you do?" Kotono shrugged nonchalantly. "I am a dragon, little one," she said, as if that explained the entire phenomenon. Her eyes brightened at the sour look Kagome felt cross her face, and she waved a hand just as the miko opened her mouth to protest. "It is something you'll learn of when you begin your miko lessons," she stated mysteriously. "For now, you have a dinner to prepare for." Kagome wanted to complain, but knowing that Kotono wouldn't say anything more on the matter, she sat quietly, allowing the dragoness to style her hair. The preparations went by much quicker than she'd thought they would, and it wasn't long before Kotono had her standing in front of a mirror, admiring her handiwork. "It fits you perfectly," the demoness murmured, smoothing her hands down Kagome's arms as she spoke. "Your seamstress is very talented," Kagome responded, knowing that the compliment would make it to the right ears. Kotono nodded, and then reached down and adjusted the bow that sat delicately in the small of her back. "Indeed she is," she murmured, looking back up and placing her hands on Kagome's shoulders. "But it is the body inside of it that gives a properly crafted kimono the beauty it possesses." Face flushing at the praise, Kagome said nothing, nervously looking away. Kotono chuckled, and then, leaning down to whisper in her ear, commented slyly, "My lord will most definitely entertain certain...thoughts…tonight." "Kotono!" A throaty laugh sounded from the dragoness' throat. "Forgive me, little one; the temptation was far too great." Shaking her head and pushing back a chuckle of her own, Kagome turned and stepped away from the mirror, though her image stayed in the forefront of her mind; a pure white kimono pulled out the slightly tanned appearance of her skin, while the deep blue obi and embroidered design brought out the vibrant blue of her eyes. Black hair was pulled up off of her neck, emphasizing the shape of her jaw and slope of her cheekbones while showing off the elegant line of her throat and the gentle dip where neck met shoulder. Obviously, by Kotono's standards, she looked good enough to entertain thoughts about, but Kagome, who always tended to be her own worst enemy, thought the kimono looked a little too expensive for a village girl trying to be something more than she was. Shoving away the harsh thoughts, Kagome followed Kotono out of the building and took a deep breath to calm her suddenly frazzled nerves. The sun was beginning to sink lower into the sky, and the early evening air was cool and clear, crickets and cicadas sending their songs into the atmosphere. They reached the dining hall much quicker than Kagome thought they should have, and Kotono turned to her with a smile, though the expression faded as she took in what Kagome was sure was a slightly pinched facade. "You are worrying again, little one," she stated quietly, reaching up to secure a wayward strand of hair. "Not over a trivial matter," Kagome retorted, nerves making her voice a little shaky. Kotono hummed reassuringly. "No, not over a trivial matter," she said, placing her hands on Kagome's shoulders and forcing her to look her in the eyes. "But worrying nonetheless." Kagome shifted on her feet, nervously fiddling with the sleeves of her kimono. "What if I mess up? What if he sends me home?" For a moment, Kotono was silent. And then, an odd expression on her face, she shook her head and stepped back. "He will not send you home, little one." Something in her voice stilled Kagome's protest, and she nodded instead, pulling another deep breath into her lungs. "Just be yourself," the dragoness advised, the strange countenance replaced by her usual regal beauty. "And stop worrying," she added, almost as an afterthought. "Okay," Kagome whispered, turning toward the building. Together, she and Kotono removed their shoes and stepped inside, walking the short distance to the door that would lead to the dining hall and kneeling outside of it. After giving Kagome an encouraging smile, Kotono lifted a hand and knocked on the frame. "My lord, I have brought the miko, as you requested." For a moment, there was a thick silence, and then the smooth baritone of Lord Sesshomaru's voice filtered through the cherry blossom designed shoji. "Enter." Kagome took a steadying breath, nodded, and Kotono opened the door.
Author's Note: Thank you to the few who have reviewed so far - no new reviewers yet, but I'm glad that a few of my FF.Net readers have taken the time to comment!
~Aubrey
