Vices

Inuyasha woke up a few hours after he fell asleep feeling sad and depressed. The bed was cold and lonely without her snuggled into his chest. Ready to start the day and find some treatment facilities Inuyasha headed to the kitchen, but not before checking to see if Miroku had indeed kept his word. To his surprise there, he was curled up like a baby sleeping peacefully. Relieved Inuyasha shut the door quietly and continued with the task at hand.

After calling what seemed like a million places Inuyasha finally found the perfect place for them to go to. It was in the northern part of Tokyo and seemed well recommended. From what the desk clerk told him, they had three group meetings a day, one on one with the counselor and medication that helped recess the urge receptors in your brain. They also had a game room, an exercise room and an indoor pool to get exercise. As she talked, Inuyasha wrote notes so he could relay the amenities and programs this place had to offer to Miroku. Feeling more at ease with his decision to clean up Inuyasha decided to make breakfast for him and Miroku.

Going for a more western style breakfast Inuyasha pulled out bacon, eggs, sausage and a loaf of bread for toast. This was a thing he and Kagome had done together on Sunday mornings; they would wake up and cook breakfast. He in his boxers and she was in one of his t-shirts. They usually ended up burning the food because they could not keep their hands off each other. The realization hit him like a ton of bricks and the tears fell. His body racked in silent sobs with the threat of losing control. He couldn’t take it anymore Kagome was no longer here with him and now he was forced to cook breakfast for his lecherous friend. Inuyasha stood leaning over the sink as he slowly gained control over his emotions and continued about making breakfast.
Miroku woke to the smell of bacon and eggs. His stomach growled making him leave the comfort of the warm bed.

“I can’t believe what I am seeing,” Miroku gasped when he saw Inuyasha over the stove, “I never would have pegged you as a cook.”

“Well one has got to eat, ain’t they?” Inuyasha replied not the least bit amused. He was just thankful Miroku did not wake up sooner. He did not think he would have ever heard the end of it if Miroku had saw him crying, “So what’ll it be?”
Miroku looked around the counters and saw that Inuyasha had cooked enough to feed an army, and bit his tongue. He knew now would not be a good time to jive at Inuyasha's expense. “Hmmm… man this all looks good; I think I will have a little bit of everything.”

Inuyasha could not help but smile at his friend’s compliment. He was used to negative feedback and when he received a compliment, he tended to smile stupidly and turn pink. “Well then grab a plate and let’s dig in.” Even though it was not Kagome he was sharing breakfast with, he was glad to have some company.

“So Miroku, I called a few places today and I think I found a great one. It is on the outskirts of Tokyo and they have great amenities. I think we should drive up there today and check it out.”

“Damn,” Miroku mumbled, “I really thought this was just a bad dream, but I guess I was wrong. You are serious, huh?”

“Hell yeah I am serious, Miroku! Kagome left me because of the life style I lived, not to mention you had a hand in it too.”

“Yes Inuyasha, I did… err… do like to party and I asked you to go and you went many times, but you could have always said no. You know I would not have been mad at you, but you just had to go. So don’t go blaming your break-up on me!”

“Okay…okay Miroku sorry, you are right I had a choice but I think if we went together it would make the transition so much easier for both of us. Oh, and I was thinking about that woman you said you met last night. You said there was something about her that….”

“That was pure and yadda yadda… I remember what I said Inuyasha,” Miroku interrupted.

“Sorry, I know you remember, well I was thinking that maybe she really doesn’t like to drink and that she was there with friends. What if she found out how much partying you really like to do and decided not to see you again. You would never get the chance to know her. Hell you never know she may be your soul mate… like Kagome is mine,” Inuyasha finished the last line so low he could barely hear it himself.

“You could be right, but what if she is a fiend like I am, and then I quit drinking so she doesn’t want to see me because I don’t party like her. Won’t that bring me back to square one?”

Inuyasha could see his logic, however, he had a feeling he knew who this girl was just by the way Miroku described her. He said she had long ebony hair that she wore in a loose ponytail, big chocolate brown eyes and her very mysterious demeanor. He only knew one other that fit that description but decided not to say anything because Tokyo was a big city and that could describe any woman that went to a bar.

They ate in silence enjoying each other’s company and the food. Inuyasha wanted to talk to Miroku many times but thought that he would not understand how he was feeling. Inuyasha knew Miroku had never been in a monogamous relationship and never had to endure a break-up. Therefore, he was probably not the best person for advice at this moment.
After they finished breakfast and cleaned the kitchen, Inuyasha went to take a hot shower to ease his tense body. Starting the shower, he turned to undress, catching himself in the mirror. The reflection showed a man with dark circles under his eyes, his once long silver mane had dulled, and the sparkle in his amber eyes had disappeared. He could not believe this was his reflection, never before had he seen himself so dejected. The fire that kept him going was slowly burning out, and he knew that was not a good thing.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Kagome woke up a few hours after she fell asleep, she felt somewhat refreshed but not nearly well enough. She knew that was due to the horrendous night she had. She and Inuyasha were no longer together and that scared her. She had been with him for over a year and he meant everything to her, but she knew she could not take his destructive life style anymore. If someone told her six months ago that they would not be together she would have punched them, but that was then and this is now. She felt different to herself. She used to be the type that could bounce back from anything but now she was just as cowardly as all the other women in Tokyo were. ‘That’s it I have to keep my mind off of all of this. When Inuyasha is ready to change he will come crawling back,’ Kagome thought trying to persuade herself into feeling better, but the hole in her heart would take awhile to mend, ‘I just hope he doesn’t take too long, I don’t know how long I can wait for him to have an epiphany.‘ Kagome decided she could not sit in the room pining over him today; she had to get out and take her mind off things. When Kagome opened the door, her nose was assaulted with the aroma of steamed rice, miso soup, natto and nori. Though she was used to the western style of breakfast her and Inuyasha used to cook together she was thankful to have anything in her empty stomach.

“Morning Sango!” Kagome chimed entering the kitchen, “Smells good would you like any help.”

“Hey there sleepy head, I am almost done here so why don’t you sit and I will bring you a plate.”

Kagome nodded she knew her friend was trying to let her take it easy, if only she knew how much this was not helping Kagome take her mind off Inuyasha. Kagome actually bit back the tears that were threatening her. She did not want Sango to see how upset she was; though she knew Sango would understand she just did not want to come off as weak. She tried to act like her mother when her father died. Her mom always had a strong front in front of her family but behind closed doors was a different story. There had been many nights when Kagome could hear the quite sobs coming from her mother’s bedroom. Kagome knew she had to be strong; fore she did not want a pity party. She could do this if not for herself then for the other women who wear their emotions on their sleeves.

Kagome and Sango ate and once again found themselves lost in meaningless chitchat, and that was okay with Kagome. Even talking about anything and everything Kagome could still see the concern in her friend’s chocolate eyes, but she chose to ignore it right now. She knew sooner or later she would have a break down but right now she was enjoying the company she had before her.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Inuyasha felt clean but not better. He was just ready to get this whole thing over with and move on with his life.
Miroku was waiting in the living room dressed and ready to go. ‘I guess he wants to do this too,’ Inuyasha thought entering the living room.

“Wow Miroku are you serious or what,” Inuyasha smirked.

“Look buddy, I don’t want to do this, but this is important to you and I know going alone would make it harder to stay sober. I for one like to party but I will do this for you. I just don’t want you to read too much into this, okay?” Miroku responded with a scowl on his face. ‘Why do I let him talk me into these things? I thought my life was just fine,’ Miroku thought standing up and following Inuyasha out of the house.

“So have you talked to Kagome today?”

Inuyasha's heart sank at the mention of her name. Of course, he thought about her all morning but no one said her name, almost as if it was a plague. Therefore, when Miroku uttered that word Inuyasha broke down. First the tears and then followed by the sobs. Miroku was at a loss he never seen, his friend in this state and didn’t know what to do. At first, he thought about comforting him but knew that he would just end up with a bloody nose. So all he had left was talking.
“Inuyasha,” Miroku said with uncertainty, “do you want me to get you anything?” but before thinking Miroku had a laid a hand on Inuyasha's heaving back. “It’s okay Inuyasha just let it out. I am always here for you.”

Inuyasha could not control it, he was lost in sadness and there was nothing that could get him out of it except Kagome.

“Thank you Miroku, for everything. I will be okay in a few minutes,” Inuyasha replied when the sobs became softer. It was only his second breakdown so far and he hoped his last.

Finally, regaining his composure Inuyasha and Miroku got in the car and headed to NTT Kanto Hospital.