A Broken Soul

Chapter 3: Fixing What Is Broken



“Why?”



“Because you bare your illness alone, instead of worrying those around you and for that you have my respect.”



“Goodnight, Sesshomaru.”



“Goodnight, Kagome.”



Kagome spent the rest of the night staring out at the night since she didn’t seem to require sleep. She watched the sun come up in the distance. But, stayed in the same place never moving. A servant came and announced the morning meal, but she ignored them. Soon it was time for the midday meal. Sesshomaru walked into her room and saw that she was unmoving. He sat across from her and ordered tea to be brought to him. The servant came and poured him a cup as well as Kagome but she ignored it. After, Sesshomaru had taken a few sips she broke the silence her voice full of sorrow and pain.



“We used to watch the sun come up every morning me and my dad when I was little. He was my hero, but one day he got sick and was in the hospital for months. I was at his side everyday hoping he would wake up from his coma. One day the machine that measured his heartbeat stopped, I was to young to know what it meant at the time. A doctor came in the room and told my mother and me to wait outside. A few minutes later he came out of the room his eyes full of sorrow. He told my mother that my father had passed away. But, I didn’t understand. She kneeled down in front of me with Souta cradled in her arms. She said Kagome, honey; daddy isn’t ever going to wake up. I began to cry and ran back into the room. When my mother came back into the room I had my face buried in my dads chest. I was hitting him on the chest trying to make him wake up. But, of course he didn’t and for a long time I cursed him for leaving me. But, late at night when nobody was there to hear me I would cry and ask him to come and make me and angel like him. I was lost for a long time after my fathers’ death. I wouldn’t talk to people, became cold and distant, I didn’t cry anymore, I didn’t feel. I didn’t because I couldn’t; it hurt too much to feel, to be happy when my father couldn’t. In a way I died the same day my father did. Slowly, I came back to the world of the living thanks to my little brother Souta. An now my mother, brother, and grandfather are gone and I’m alone. I can feel myself fading away again and this time I’m not sure I want to come back.”



“What about the family you have here. Are the taijiya, monk, and kitsune not your family? Would you not live for them?”



“I can’t it hurts to much to feel, I can feel the pain all over again. I just want the pain to stop.”



“The pain will never stop. If it does, then it was never real pain.”



Kagome for the first time in hours looked from the image outside the window to look at Sesshomaru. She had never heard him speak with any emotion in his voice other then anger and boredom. Sesshomaru met her gaze intently and let her see all the pain and sorrow he hid in his heart. Kagome broke the connection between them. She felt that in letting her see all the pain in his heart Sesshomaru was searching her broken soul through her eyes, she felt he was looking for something and feared he may have found it. Kagome stood and ran from the room needing to put some space between herself and Sesshomaru. She ran through the castle and out the front door to the weeping willow that was on the front lawn. She climbed up into the trees branches seeking solitude and space from everything around her. Slowly tears welled in her eyes and spilled down her face. Kagome hadn’t had time to grieve for her family and now she was going to do just that. She didn’t make a sound as she cried out her pain, her tears were personal and so was her grief. Sesshomaru walked outside to find Kagome. He didn’t know why he was drawn to her just that he was. Her pain bothered him more then anything ever had and he didn’t understand why. He walked over to the weeping willow and looked up where he saw Kagome crying, he jumped up to sit next to her on the branch. Kagome couldn’t explain why she felt like she could cry in front of Sesshomaru; she didn’t know why she felt comfort in his presence, or why she felt she could talk to him about almost anything. Kagome leaned into Sesshomaru’s arm and rested her head on his shoulder; he slipped his arm around her and pulled her into his lap smoothing her hair back as she cried. Slowly, her tears stopped and she looked out across the lawn.



“You must think I’m pathetic.”



“You are not pathetic, Kagome. Come with me to greet the other taiyoukai.”



Kagome nodded against his chest. Sesshomaru dropped down from the tree and released Kagome who took off running toward the castle yelling about a bath. Sesshomaru shook his head and walked toward the castle. Kagome took a quick soak in the hot spring, then ran back to her room to change. She brushed her hair into a high ponytail, then put on a black tank top and black leather shorts, she also strapped her holsters to her thighs and slid both of her guns into place. Two clips sitting next to each gun. Slipping into her black air force ones Kagome ran outside and down to the gate to meet Sesshomaru slightly breathless from her run. Sesshomaru looked her over slowly his eyes lingering on her legs. Kagome noticed his eyes lingering on her legs and felt her heart flutter, but didn’t understand why Sesshomaru looking at her legs would cause her heart to beat a little faster. Sesshomaru smirked when he heard her heart beat speed up from his gaze. A soldier ran up and told Sesshomaru of the Southern Lords arrival. Sesshomaru nodded in understanding.



“Lord Sesshomaru, nice to see you again.”



“Welcome Lord Kyomaru, Lady Kaori, Prince Ryomaru. A servant will meet you at the front door to show you to your room.”



“Thank you, Lord Sesshomaru.”



Kagome bowed to each of the members of the Southern family before they walked up to the castle. Sesshomaru and Kagome saw the look of disgust the young southern prince had given her. Kagome’s aura had flared around her at the blunt show of disrespect and she had had to resist the urge to punch the little bastard in the face. Next, to arrive was the Eastern Lord, Lord Diamaro and his mate, Lady Takima, along with their daughter Princess Naori. Everything was the same as last time except this time Kagome was completely ignored by the princess, who was to busy staring at Sesshomaru. Again, Kagome’s aura flared, but this time in aggravation for being ignored. Then, came the person Kagome wanted to avoid at all cost. She looked at Sesshomaru silently asking if she could go back to the castle so she didn’t have to see Kouga. He shook his head slightly no and smirked when he saw her pout before she sent him a death glare.



“Hello Lord Sesshoma… Kagome what are you doing here?”



“A servant will meet you at the door to show you to your room Lord Kouga.”



Kagome kept her tone calm and respectful all the while sending Sesshomaru a glare that could have frozen over hell twice. Sesshomaru let the blunt disrespect from Kouga pass due to the facts that one he was only a mangy wolf and two the reactions he was getting from Kagome for making her stay to greet Kouga was very amusing. After awhile of promising to talk to him later Kagome got Kouga to go up to the castle. She sigh a breath of relief before turning to Sesshomaru her eyes blazing with anger. The amusement in his eyes doing nothing, but making her angrier. She turned and walked toward the weeping willow on the lawn wanting to pout in the privacy of its’ dark confines. Sesshomaru followed her up into its’ branches and sighed gently something he never did.



“Get out Sesshomaru this is my space.”



Sesshomaru raised an eyebrow at her words. Without thinking he pulled Kagome to him and kissed her. At first Kagome was to shocked to do anything, but when he was pulling away she wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him back to her, kissing him back. Sesshomaru pulled Kagome into his lap and slipped his arms around her waist. They broke apart for air for a few seconds before Sesshomaru again claimed Kagome’s lips and licked at her bottom lip for entrance. Kagome opened her mouth to him and moaned into his mouth when his tongue brushed across her own. Sesshomaru explored every crevice of her mouth before he released his hold on her lips. After, a few more intense and passionate kisses Sesshomaru and Kagome returned to the castle to get ready for the evening meal. With the evening meal came the arrival of Inuyasha who was seated next to Kagome for dinner. Being near Inuyasha was hurting Kagome. She glanced over at Sesshomaru to see if she could please be excused. Sesshomaru met her gaze and saw the pain in her eyes. Kagome reached into his mind gently.



‘Please Sesshomaru excuse me from the table.’



‘I can not; to do so would be disrespectful to the other lords. Please wait until dinner is over.’



Kagome eased from his mind and winced when a sharp pain cut through her. Sesshomaru saw her wince and could feel the pain building in her body. Kagome had to find something to concentrate on if she was going to remain conscious much longer. Kagome let her eyes glaze over and called out to the spirits around her seeking their comfort.



(Conversation with the Spirits)



‘Help me, spirits.’



‘We are here milady, but we can not help you. For we may do more harm then good if we do.’



‘Which spirits are you?’



‘We are the spirits of water, earth, air, fire, and time.’



‘Time has a spirit?’



‘Yes, milady.’



‘Spirits I am broken and need your help to fix my soul.’



‘If it is truly what you wish milady we will merge with you and help you fix your soul.’



‘Thank you spirits.’



‘The change will be permanent, Lady Kagome.’



‘I understand.’



‘Call back your soul then we’ll do the rest.’



Kagome called her soul back from Kikyo and felt it enter her body. Then held out her hands in front of her. Five balls of light appeared in her hands, they were red, blue, violet, gold, and green. Everyone at the table watched the balls of light merge into a single ball of white light. They watched as Kagome pulled the ball of light to her chest. The light shot into her chest knocking her backward, but instead of her body hitting the floor it began to glow violet and hovered above the floor. Sango stood and was about to run to her when Shippou’s voice cut through the air. Shippou had changed from his child form to his adult form.



“Don’t touch her, Sango. She’s merging her soul with the spirits of fire, water, air, earth, and time. If anyone touches her she’ll die.”



“Why?”



“To merge ones soul with a spirit is against the laws of the kamis. To even attempt such a thing is punishable by death. For anyone to successfully merge their soul with that of a spirit is remarkable. But, for Kagome to merge her soul with five spirits at the same time is unheard of and requires energy that no human, demon, or hanyou can generate. Kagome alone is the exception to that rule because she is broken. Because she is broken Kagome’s soul was starting to cross over to the world of the spirits. That allowed her to generate power that even some of the weaker kamis could only dream of. Now add that with her own extraordinarily strong miko abilities and Kagome is a goddess. If she pulls this merger off she will be the most powerful creation to have ever walked the earth. She won’t be human, hanyou, or demon, she will be a miko goddess of the elements and time.”



Kagome’s soul was almost complete again when something went wrong. Her body began to fill with pain. The spirits told her they needed the moonlight to complete the merge. Kagome brought her mind back to reality and looked at those around her. Lastly, her gaze landed on Sesshomaru.



“Sorry about this Sesshomaru.”



Before he could question her words Kagome shot a beam of pure white light from her hands allowing the moons light to come through the huge hole she had created. Then, she sunk back into a semi unconscious state. Her body rose higher from the ground and began to spin in a circle until finally the violet glow around her disappeared and she fell from the air. She landed in a kneeling position it took a few seconds before she stood. She took one step and fell to her knees; she slowly got to her feet again. Slowly getting to her feet again she wavered before falling. Sesshomaru caught her just before she hit the ground and shifted her so that he now held her bridal style.



“Kitsune, why she unconscious.”



“She’s used a lot of energy to fix her soul and needs rest to gain her energy, she should be fine in the morning.”



“The ball will be tomorrow night unless I feel there is a reason to delay it.”