Consequences

Pairing : MirokuxInuyasha
Rating : NC-13
Disclaimer : Rumiko Takahashi owns all the lovely characters.
Authors notes & Warnings : Mpreg. Angst. Lemon.
Feedback is appreciated and can be sent to saraste_impi@hotmail.com. I want to thank my wonderful beta Serenity for her work, time and engouragement. *bows and hugs*.


He was sick. He held his stomach as he emptied its contents into the bushes. It was a habit now to rush away before anyone woke and heave the contents of his stomach out. Wiping his mouth clean with the back of his hand, he sat on his haunches. It was very tiring, this sickness that ailed him.



* * * *



He knew that Kagome loved him. Yes, she could be annoying and quick not to think sometimes, but in her heart she was golden. But the love, that brotherly urge to keep her away from harm wasn’t enough for him. And he knew that Kagome couldn’t really love him for who he was, not really. That was why he had fallen almost headfirst for Miroku. After that incident with Gatenmaru they had really felt the urge for one another.



Miroku and him, it had all started so sweetly after that. With Kagome by the stream when he had tried to wash away his quilt, he had known that his love for her had changed, permanently.



They had avoided being alone after that. There was always one of the girls with them and if it was just the two of them, they’d not spoken a single word. That lasted for a total of three weeks. But their eyes weren’t silent. Inuyasha had thought all that time that Miroku was battling with himself when, in reality, the monk was lusting after him but thought that he was still in his heart of hearts pining after either Kagome or Kikyo, possibly both.



After another brush with death Inuyasha had sought out the elusive monk and asked him, asked him if he could ever find love within himself for a hanyou. It had all been very sweet after that. Whispers in the dark, stolen kisses behind trees, stealing away to slake their lust.



Until now.



Inuyasha knew that if Miroku found out he had been throwing up it would be either go willingly back to Kaede’s village, or be dragged there screaming and preferably unconscious.



There was a rustle of undergrowth and someone rushed to him. A hand touched his shoulder.



“I’m fine, Miroku!”



“Miroku?”



Inuyasha turned his head sharply and exclaimed under his breath, cursing his human senses.



“Sango!”



Sango cocked her head and then shook it. She couldn’t fathom who Inuyasha really was, no matter how hard she tried.



“Are you alright?”



“Yes, I’m just fine.”



His voice was impatient with an edge of rashness. He was hiding something at least that was how Sango saw it. She didn’t push the matter, letting the secretive hanyou have his privacy.



“No need to sound like that.” The demon-exterminator still gave him a small verbal nudge to remind him of a thing called ’good manners’. Inuyasha rose and felt Sango’s hand slide off his shoulder. ’What will I say?’ He had to hide his earlier blunder.



“Sorry, still...adjusting, to being human.”



“The others were wondering where you got off to”, Sango said conversationally as they headed back to camp. Inuyasha shrugged his shoulders not really wanting to answer that with anything.



The two arrived at the campsite near a brook and the first thing Inuyasha noticed were the captivating eyes of his lover as Miroku glanced slyly and worriedly up from his sitting position.



’Oh, how he worries of me!’ This thought shot first in the hanyou’s mind as he locked eyes with his love. ’I should tell him, he’d coddle me to death but he wouldn’t look so frightened, either.’



Kagome looked up, too. She was leaning on a tree with a book in her lap and with Shippo leaning on her side, sleeping.



“Oh, where were you. I was so worried when you weren’t here when I woke up !”



Hairs in the back of Inuyasha’s neck shot up, he wasn’t in the mood for this, not today.



“I went for a little walk, it isn’t forbidden, is it? I was all stiff when I woke up in the morning.”



At that last remark he could swear he heard a stifled chuckle from where Miroku was sitting cross-legged, apparently meditating. The double meaning eluded the others, even if it was intended as innocent, just illustrating the state of his supposedly cramped back muscles.



Now Sango joined in on the conversation.



“You know you shouldn’t go out of the camp alone. What if you get attacked? You are strong still, for a human, but the Tessaiga won’t transform and you’ll be easy prey to demons.”



“Then why are we camping here if it’s so damned dangerous?”



“I didn’t say it was dangerous in here per say, I just reminded of the possibility.”



Inuyasha turned...and the entire world swam in his head. He swayed once; fleetingly seeing the terror etched in Miroku’s face, and fell to the ground unconscious.



* * * *



It hadn’t been easy burying these feelings inside. He had wanted to show it to everyone once he was secure that they wouldn’t fade, had wanted to shout it to the world. But his lover, his sweet hanyo, had held him back. For it was new to Inuyasha, being safe with his love. Not fearing someone would come snatch it away just for the fun of it. So he held back, held back and flirted shamelessly with his eyes, driving his lover mad. What if the others noticed, Inuyasha demanded, what if they wouldn’t understand? These worries were always cast away by a lecherous wink and a fiery kiss afterwards.



But right now he didn’t care who saw and what his lover would say afterwards, he just rushed to him, his face blanched pale.



“So there really was something the matter with him...” Miroku heard Sango murmur as he knelt to his lovers side. Inuyasha lay on the ground motionless. Kagome had rushed up, the book falling to the ground, forgotten.





Miroku turned to Sango who in fact eyed him a bit quizzically.



“What do you mean?” He asked and cast a glance to the hanyou’s pale face.



“I found him in the woods, he was hunched down as if in pain.. He wouldn’t say what was wrong. And actually...the odd thing was, he thought I was you when I first came.”



At this Kagome turned her head to stare at Miroku instead of Inuyasha who she had been worriedly gazing, being beside him his hand in hers.



“What? I don’t know why he thought it was me!” ’I wish it had been, maybe then I’d know what is wrong with him!’ He squeezed the hand he was holding. When he had taken it into his own, he had no idea.



And now both Kagome and Sango were staring at him. ’So it was a love triangle? But I had the roles wrong.’ Sango thought. ’I didn’t know they were such good friends’ ran through Kagome’s head. Shippo, who had abrubtly woken up stared at all of them sleepy-eyed. Kirara slept through it all.



“What do you think was wrong with him earlier?” Miroku asked Sango, trying to keep the threatening shakiness away from his voice. He was voicing a silent plea in his head for Inuyasha to wake up.





“I don’t know...” Sango mused.



“But what’s wrong with him now?” Kagome added, concerned for her dear friend.



“I think we should take him to Kaede’s, she’ll figure it out.” Miroku said. He actually hoped that Inuyasha would stay unconscious for the trip, awake he would be near impossible to move anywhere he didn’t want to go. His hopes were crushed, though, when Inuyasha wailed softly and started to stir.



Blue eyes searched out the monks own and were assured of his lover’s presence. Then there were the others, what would they say? And had he really fainted? Apparently, as he was laying in the ground.



“What happened?”



“Are you ill?”



“You weren’t really alright earlier, were you?”



Questions bombarded him and he turned his head around the three worried faces, trying to appear disconcerting.



“I didn’t eat when I woke up, that’s all.”



“That can’t be it, you obviously weren’t well before.”



“We’re taking you to Kaede’s village, and no buts!” Miroku added the warning as he saw his lover open his mouth in protest.



“I’m not going, and you can’t make me.” At this the hanyou sat up, only to be steadied by the monk as he felt light-headed.



“I’m all right, just a little under the weather.”



“You call fainting and hunching down in the woods alright?!” Miroku was almost yelling now. He hoped that they were alone, just him and his lover and he could just pound some sense into him. (A/N: No pun intented!)



Inuyasha and Miroku stared at each other. They both knew that Miroku could try to claim his right as Inuyasha’s lover and try to force the hanyou to leave willingly; he had the power of their love to back him up. But that would blow their cover and they’d be found out. Inuyasha wasn’t yet sick enough to be willing to forgive the monk if he played that card, not yet. And Miroku knew that Inuyasha would, especially at first, view it as betrayal. He had promised and so he let his gaze slip. He couldn’t force the hanyou to obey.



“I still think we have to go to Kaede’s village”, Kagome demanded and actually tried to haul Inuyasha up by his hand. She didn’t succeed and nearly lost her balance.



“We really cannot make him leave if he doesn’t want to”



Two heads turned to the monk and ogled him curiously. First he had demanded that Inuyasha go and now he respected his wishes, even for the sake of his health? ’So are they or aren’t they together?’



Sango, Kagome, and Miroku continued to bicker whether or not they should make Inuyasha go to Kaede’s village and whether or not he was sick enough or sick at all so that they should make him.



Meanwhile, Inuyasha eyed the food laid beside for him, he had actually skipped breakfast and was quite hungry having emptied his stomach earlier. His growling stomach brought the others back from their heated discussion.



Miroku dived for the food and gave it to Inuyasha’s waiting hands. It was a portion of the delicious ramen Kagome brought back from her time. Inuyasha’s mouth watered in anticipation.



“Sorry, it didn’t register that you hadn’t eaten yet”, the monk apologized as he handed him the food. The hanyou took the food and tuck in hungrily.



“I’m not going back to Kaede’s village, and that’s final!” He declared between mouthfuls.



Not really able to physically drag the hanyou anywhere as he was stronger than any of them even in his human form the matter was dropped for the time being.



The day wore on slowly as they trekked beside the river. All were gloomy, most of all Inuyasha, who had the feeling that the others would spirit him away when he fell asleep. When they made camp Kagome and Sango both watched him intently as he laid himself down to the ground for sleep.



“Won’t you eat anything with us?” Kagome asked kindly but only getting a glare for an answer.



She sighed in defeat. ’I cannot beat his stubborness, so why do I even try? But what is going on between him and Miroku, they been really edgy all day and otherwise very strange...



They ate their supper in silence and even Inuyasha took a bit of soup as he grew hungry watching the others eat. Miroku promised to keep guard and wake Sango later, so the demon exterminator was asleep soon after and Kagome too, with a book as an impromptu pillow.



Making sure that all the others were asleep Miroku crept over to his lover who lay leaning to a tree looking extremely grumpy. He placed a lithe kiss on the hanyou’s brow, brushing away some stray locks from his face.



“You were sick in the morning, weren’t you? I can tell. You kept denying it a bit too vehemently.”



Blue eyes met brown and they had a struggle of wills, finally it was Inuyasha who loved his gaze first. It was time to come clean and be true. He sighed and let it all out.



“I’ve...I’ve been ill these past few weeks, throwing up in the morning.”



His explanation was met with a stern look from his lover and a silently whispered curse.



“Why didn’t you tell me earlier? Don’t you trust me?” Miroku’s voice threatened to rise an octave but Inuyasha shushed him and motioned towards the others with his hand.



“Fine. How long?”



“It started about a week after that morning I didn’t transform back after the New Moon.”



“What? But that was five weeks ago! So you’ve been ill a month?!”



“Keep it down, will you... It hasn’t been every morning, until recently. I could hide it. And today was the only time I fainted afterwards.”



Miroku threw his hands around the hanyou and held him close.



“I just wish you hadn’t kept this from me...” He said sadly.



“I’m..sorry.” Inuyasha returned the hug and they just held each other for a long time. Finally they snuggled against the tree Miroku holding Inuyasha almost in his lap.



“I don’t know, I’ve just been so thrown about this human stuff that I didn’t think and I didn’t want you to worry.”



He turned and caressed Miroku’s cheek and smiled. The monk smiled back. They melted together in a sweet and tender kiss.



“Gods, I’d like to be with you like this the whole night”, Miroku sighed into his lovers mane after they had settled in their earlier position and Inuyasha leaned onto his lovers chest.



Inuyasha’s eyes shot open at this, he had been on the edges of sleep, not caring about anything.



“But they would know, then... I don’t...”



“I’m tired of not being able to love you openly. Sneaking around in the shadows and hiding in the night for secret kisses...it’s just.. And if they... if they don’t approve, then they aren’t really our friends. I want to be able to hold you and show the world how much I love you.”



Miroku took hold of Inuyasha’s hands and intertwined his fingers with his.



“I will always be with you no matter what...” He whispered into his lover’s ear. “And we can’t keep it a secret forever...”



The hanyou sighed, was it really so important to sneak around and be without his lovers open love and support? Should he deny Miroku this? Himself? Would they ever be truly honest with each other if they couldn’t even be open and honest about their relationship, sharing it with their friends?



“Alright, we’ll tell them. Tomorrow.”



The monk gave a goodnight kiss to his yawning hanyou and held him close as his breathing evened and he fell asleep. He kept vigil there, holding his dearest close until it was time to wake Sango.



* * * *



Morning found Inuyasha again rushing up upon waking and throwing up in the ground some

way downstream from their camp. As he dry heaved Miroku appeared behind him and offered him a wet cloth to wipe his mouth with.



“Thank you...Are the others wake yet?”



“Sango is, Kagome isn’t. Come,” he hauled Inuyasha up, “let’s get something inside that empty stomach.” At this remark his lover turned green in the face and turned around to gag.



“Morning Sango”, Miroku greeted as they came back.



Sango looked up at them from where she had been tending to the fire. Them coming together and the way Inuyasha was docile and let the monk help him sit down him confirmed her suspicions. ’Poor Kagome’, she thought, ’she wont like this.’ She walked over to where the girl slept and gently shook her wake.



“Time to get up, it’s morning already.”



Kagome opened her sleepy eyes and looked around. She groaned, sleeping in a sleeping bag and having to wake up almost in time with the sun. It was more than unfair. It was just plain wrong at times.



They ate in silence. Inuyasha kept small brakes to keep off the bile that threatened to rise in his throat. Despite his best efforts he had to rush up and off to heave up what little he had managed to eat so far. Miroku, Sango and Kagome all glanced at each other. Shippo, young as he was, and interested more about his food kept on eating.



Miroku and Sango didn’t like it at all for they both knew that the hanyo had already been sick earlier that morning. Kagome was just otherwise over worried.



After the retching sound had subsided Miroku got up and hurried to Inuyasha. The hanyou was actually on his knees now, leaning heavily on his hands that were keeping him upright. He drew in large gulps of air. Miroku offered him a mouthful of water to wash off the foul taste.



“We are going to Kaede’s village, you are in no condition to be traveling around the countryside.”



Inuyasha looked at him as the other helped him up and finally nodded weakly.



“I have no power to argue with you. And I’m tired of this.”



“And us?”



“When we get to the village.”



* * * *



Inuyasha was helped onto Kirara’s back and they made their way slowly towards the village. Inuyasha was a pain for most of the way, but despite their slow trekking they reached the village at sundown three days later, having been quite close. Miroku let slip the fact that Inuyasha had postponed telling the others about them, his lovers fragile health kept the harsh words he so wanted to say inside.



“What brings you here so soon? Kaede greeted them, puzzled to see the hanyou on the demon cat’s back, or was it really the hanyo?



“Inuyasha, is that you?”



The tired hanyou looked at her while Miroku helped him get down.



“It’s a long story...”



“He’s ill.”



Miroku cut his lover short; impatient to know what was wrong with him.



“Ill?”



As she spoke she ushered them through the throng of curious villagers into her hut. There she saw to it that Inuyasha was laid down to rest. Then she hushed them all outside to get into the bottom of it all.



“How long has he been ill?”



“Almost five weeks.”



At this Sango and Kagome exclaimed and looked the monk peculiarly.



“No he hasn’t, he’s only been sick for the past five days!” Kagome said with conviction.



“That you knew of, he’s been hiding it for weeks now. He told me.”



Kagome’s eyes welled up with tears and she put a hand to her mouth.



“Is that how little he really trusts us?” Sango inquired.



“He didn’t want us to fuss over him more than we already were, remember how he reacted after he didn’t turn back?”



Both women were silent. But Kaede broke the silence.



“Alright, so he’s been ill for nigh six weeks now, but how and why does he seem human?”



“He turns human at every New Moon, but five weeks ago he remained so and didn’t turn back to his hanyou form as he usually does. And a week after that he started to throw up in the mornings. We only found out five days ago and finally managed to get him to come here after he had fainted and was very sick the next day days ago.”



After Miroku’s explanation Kaede looked grim. This was unlike anything he had come across before, not forgetting the fact that hanyou’s apparently changed human on occasion.



He went back to her hut to examine her patient. When she forbade the others to enter she witnessed the fleeting image of sadness and worriedness that flitted through Miroku’s features, she couldn’t fathom it, for surely the monk and the hanyou were not such close friends, or perhaps they were?



When Kaede reemerged from the hut she was none the wiser.



“I honestly can’t say what ails him. He shows no other signs of illness except for the fact that he complained of tiredness. You really cannot tell me more? Has he come in contact with something that might’ve made him ill? He wouldn’t tell me.”





“I don’t know..,” Miroku started. ’What can I say? That I fuck him regularly and that’s why he’s exhausted. But we haven’t recently...’



“What, Miroku?”



“I can’t tell you why he’s ill. I don’t know.”



“Well, I think he should rest here for a while. It may just be the stress of being human and that he’s not used to it. Or then it could be anything.”



Kaede sighed; it was most unusual for her not to know what was wrong with one of her patients. What kind of a priestess was she?



While the others were outside, Inuyasha was fretting inside the hut. Why couldn’t Kaede tell him what was wrong with him? Stress, hah, he was tough, he was... ’Gods, I don’t even know what I am anymore!’ A creaking sound behind him informed him of another’s presence in the room. He turned and backed to the wall for what he saw terrified him in his current state.



Sesshomaru. Standing right beside him with his trademark consenting look.



“You have fallen for a human!” The words were whispered harshly and menacingly.



“Sesshomaru...,” Inuyasha was silent when he felt a strong hand wrap around his neck. “Sessh..please...breath...”



Inuyasha struggled against his older brother, but he remained unmoved. Sesshomaru lowered himself near Inuyasha so that he could whisper into his ear.



“You shame our father...Carrying it on with a human!”



“I love him!”



“Maybe, but you’ve allowed yourself to be taken by him, haven’t you. I can tell, you reek of it!” And... Sesshomaru’s eyes widened, it was unbelievable, he was a hanyou!



“And you’re with his child...”



“Inuyasha, are you...” Miroku stopped in the doorway, staring at the brothers.



“So it’s you,” Sesshomaru said coldly, the monk... He kept his hold on Inuyasha’s neck, threatening to crush it before he could even die of suffocation.



“Inuyasha!”



At his cry the others stormed the hut. Sango gripped her weapon, cursing the enclosed space with prevented her from using it. Sesshomaru stood at his full height and lifted Inuyasha off the floor, his struggle becoming weaker by the second.



Miroku took hold of the beads in his hand that bound his Kazaana.



“Let him go!”



“Maybe I will, there’s no reason to kill him when he can’t fight back and because of his ’condition’.” With this he threw the now unconscious hanyou towards Miroku and made for the window.



“He’ll leave you before you know it!”



And he disappeared.



Miroku held Inuyasha close to him, feeling his heartbeat, though erratic, against his chest. He was sitting on the floor, having been thrown off balance by his lovers weight. Then he turned to the others. There was a strained silence.



“’Hell leave you..?’” Kagome didn’t want to understand this, surely Sesshomaru couldn’t have meant that? And she wasn’t seeing what she saw.



But thay all turned to Inuyasha as he coughed and slowly tried to open his eyes.



“Miroku?...,” he whispered hoarsely.



“I’m here.” He hugged his lover close, not caring for the others.



“I thought I’d lose you.”



“Why are you holding him like that?!” Kagome’s voice was shrill and she looked quite shocked.



“Kagome...” The monk tried to explain, but his lover halted him.



“I...that is, we are in love...” Inuyasha almost whispered and gripped Miroku’s hand a little tighter. The monk answered with a reassuring squeeze.



They were met with three pairs of eyes in varying stages of stares. Sango looked a little bit amused, but her smile was encouraging. Kagome looked a bit paler and on the verge of tears. Shippo just looked stunned, but he didn’t seem bothered by all this.



“I’m sorry Kagome, but... I love him.”



Miroku smiled at his lover, seeing only him and not the alarmed look on Kagome's face.



“And I love Inuyasha...”



“No...” Kagome backed to the door, tears staining her cheeks. Then something snapped and she rushed out the door, sobbing.



Inuyasha cursed himself for having been so tactless and straightforward, but what could he have done after she’d already seen him in Miroku’s arms?



“I’ll go and see she’s alright,” Sango said and cast an almost sad glance at the pair.



“Sango...,” Miroku started.



“No, I’m only saddened you didn’t choose me to be your love...,” she sighed in mock seriousness. And then she smiled to him and went off to search Kagome.



Kaede clapped her old hand on his shoulder on her way out.



“Love is love,” was all she said.



As the door closed Miroku kissed Inuyasha’s brow.



“Are you alright?”



“Yes, just a little hoarse and my throat hurts.”



“I heard the end of what he said, ’with his child’, what did he mean?”



“I have no....” He stopped as the words repeated in his head, ’You are with his child’. He’d head of demon males being able to carry but he’d never believed them. But Sesshomaru had the senses of a demon.



Tears filled Inuyasha’s eyes; he’d never believed it possible. He hadn’t thought nothing of it as his relationship with Miroku had evolved, for their love had been enough. But this, it was a gift, a precious gift.



“What? Are you in pain, should I call Kaede?” Miroku was panicking.



“No, but I think that I know what might be wrong with me...” His voice trailed off.



“What? Tell me, please.”



Miroku held his lovers face between in his hands and looked at him, begging him to tell everything.



“I might be pregnant.”



“What?!”



At that moment Sango entered the hut hurriedly.



“She went through the well...”



Her voice trailed off as she saw the pair. Inuyasha was sitting somewhat upright but it was Miroku who had her full attention, for he had fainted.



“What?”



“Just told him something he didn’t quite believe.”



“I am happy for you, really.”



“Thank you.”



“So what did you tell him that made him faint?” Sango asked as she heaved the monk to the bedding and lay him down. Inuyasha sat next to his lover, a cryptic smile lighting up his face.



“I told him he might become a father.”



“What?”