Texan Fun in the Feudal Era

A/N: review yo! It makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside, you know, like I swallowed some kid’s teddy bear and they’re staring at me while crying because, hey, I just ate their bear. Yeah, that feeling.


Operation: ‘Magic Whales’


“There!” shouted a female voice. “I can sense a jewel shard over by that cave!”

You raised a curious eyebrow. What the hell was going on now?

“Look out!” cried another female’s voice. “Wolf trolls!”

There was a suddenly smacking sound before the trees to your left rustled and two men came falling from the sky.

You jumped and sped off, “AHHH! It’s raining men!!!”

You paused.

“Wait? It’s raining men? Why the hell am I running then?”

You turned back the way you came, standing just clear of the surrounding forest. The two men slowly got to their feet, taking defense stances against whatever was about to come through the trees.

You were behind them and you cautiously took a step forward.

The one on the left had a nice ass. He was also in a dress. You cocked your head. Okay, it could have been a robe, but it looked like a dress. It was a royal purple and the guy had short black hair tied in a ponytail.

The second guy…whoo, another nice ass, ahem, anyway, he had this long gorgeous white hair that swept down his back. He was wearing a slightly more masculine looking…poofy…thingy…with pants.

And he also….

‘Oh he does not…’ you thought, shaking your head.

‘Oh I think he does,’ said your alter ego.

He had freakin’ ears. Not like normal ears. Like…cat ears…or perhaps Siberian husky ears.

‘Ooookkkaaaayyyy…’ you thought. ‘Someone’s a demon…or a loser with fake ears.’

You stopped your inner monologue when you saw what stepped through the heavy brush. It looked like it could have been the cousin of the werewolf thing you had met earlier. Except it was a lot bigger.

The guy in red held up a huge sword and ran at the demon while the other guy…Oh good God.

Jingle, jingle.

All thought process stopped as your ADD focused entirely on the man’s staff. It was like…the ultimate shiny. You didn’t really like gold, but you quickly made an exception. It had these little rings on the top of it the made the most joyous of sounds.

Jingle, jingle.

Your ADD had never been so pleased.

But your happy feeling was interrupted when your attention returned to the world around you.

“Inuyasha!” cried a girl.

Hm, she was kinda cute. She was in a school uniform (mmm…naughty school girl much?), with long black hair and long pale legs. Her brown eyes widened in surprise when she caught sight of you.
The two guys were fighting the werewolf, who had now been joined by three of his buddies.

The schoolgirl seemed to be holding a tan ball of fluff in her arms and she quickly turned to a woman who had just come to her side followed by a kitten.

“Whoa,” you said.

This new woman was hot. And dressed like some sort of dominatrix. You just barely kept yourself from drooling as she met your heated gaze with her clear dark eyes.

“Inuyasha!” shouted the first girl. “She has the jewel shard in her hand!”

“She must be controlling the wolf trolls,” said the dominatrix.

You blinked and looked behind you.

“Me?!” you cried. “Oh what the hell?! It’s ‘cause I’m black ain’t it?!”

Everyone focused on you, even the wolf trolls.

You crossed your arms in a huff.

“YOU!” snarled a familiar voice.

You stiffened and leaned to the side to see the werewolf you had beaten the crap out of earlier.

“She’s the one!” your wolf growled.

The other three huge wolves turned on you, ignoring the two men they had been fighting with.

“You’ll pay for hurting our cousin!” they howled.

You stood still for maybe five seconds before spinning on your heel and pelting into the forest, screaming at the top of your lungs.

“Hiraikotsu!” you heard dominatrix yell from behind you.

You managed to sneak a glance behind you while running, but ended tripping over an upturned root. You fell flat on your face and skidded to a halt. Which was pretty damn lucky, because a giant boomerang whirled passed where you had been only seconds before.

A splash of blood spattered on you and you realized that all four wolves had just been cut in half.

Then a large cat with two tails jumped down in front of you, roaring as you stared wide-eyed at it.

“WHAT THE FUCK IS GOIN’ ON?!?!?!” you screamed.

The cat quit its roaring in a hurry and blinked at you.

“Hold it right there demon!” yelled a deep voice.

You got up on your knees and looked behind you. The dude dressed in red with the sword was standing there, but he gulped and blushed when he saw you and how you were dressed.

The man with the ADD jingle staff ran up behind him and also paused as he stared at you.

You suddenly forgot about being in the Twilight Zone as a stupid giggle passed through your lips. Good Lord these guys were hot. And not just any hot. The ‘oh-my-god-tie-me-down-and-spank-me’ hot.

“Wow,” you said saucily.

Then the two women ran up.

The school girl raised a bow and shouted, “Give us the jewel shard!”

You stood up and quirked your eyebrow with your hand on your hip.

“What the fuck are you talkin’ hon? I ain’t got a damn thing…” you paused and your eyes widened. “Do you mean the shiny?!”

You locked the shiny in a kung fu death grip and snorted, “You’re cute babe, but not that cute.”

“I don’t sense a demonic aura,” said the dominatrix.

The guy with the sword sniffed the air, “She doesn’t smell like a demon.”

The guy with the staff smiled, “She doesn’t look like one either.”

“She looks human,” said the ball of fluff.

You blinked, realizing that it was a kid…thing. It looked like Yoko Kurama. A cuter baby version of Yoko Kurama. Was it a fox demon? Were you in the Makai?

The school girl lowered her bow, “Who are you?”

You raised an eyebrow, “Ya’ll are the one’s attackin’ me, so you got it ass backwards. Who are you?”

The girl blinked, “I’m Kagome, this is Sango, Inuyasha, and Miroku.”

“And I’m Shippo!” chirped the fox demon. “That’s Kilala.”

The cat behind you roared, and in a flash of orange fire, transformed into the kitten you had seen earlier.

A stupid look came across your face, “Okay…everyone just saw that cat burst into flames right? It wasn’t just me?”

Kagome took a step forward, “Where are you from?”

“Texas,” you answered.

Her eyes lit with understanding, “You’re from my time!”

You cocked your head, “What?”


~~~~~


An hour later, and you explaining your story.

“I followed this butterfly into a place…think it was a shrine…then I fell down the proverbial rabbit hole,” you said.

The group had stopped questioning you long enough for you to bathe the blood from your body. Not that you had given them much choice. And now all of you were sitting around a fire with the night sky shining down.

Kagome nodded, “Yes that was my family shrine. You must have fallen down the well.”

You raised an eyebrow, “Don’t wells usually have water in them?”

Kagome blinked, “Whales do…I said well.”

(author: when true Southerners say ‘well’…it comes out sounding like ‘whale’…we can’t help it, it’s the accent)

You narrowed your eyes, “Why are you talkin’ about whales? You should have a sign saying ‘danger: wells’ by that shrine thing.”

Kagome stared blankly at you, “Wells.”

“Wells,” you repeated, not noticing your accent.

“Wells,” she said again.

“Wells,” you said, finally you realized what the problem was and scowled. “This is why I’m callin’ it a damn hole.”

Sango smiled, “So what is your name anyway?”

“Oh yeah,” you said. “I’m O’Siris.”

You suddenly felt a presence at your side and you turned to come face to face with Miroku.

‘Damn he’s pretty,’ you thought stupidly as he stared at you with his big violet eyes.

“O’Siris is a beautiful name for a beautiful woman,” the monk said, taking your hand in his own.

You smirked and batted your long lashes, “Oh is it now?”

You jolted in surprise when you felt a large hand on your ass. You were so shocked, you let out a little yelp.

Immediately Miroku had a human sized lump on his head and Sango was bearing down on him, holding up her boomerang.

“Pervert!” she yelled.

The little Shippo narrowed his eyes cutely at you, “But you were a coward! Running away from those demons like that! You were lucky we got to you.”

“Shippo!” Kagome said.

You snorted, “If you define cowardice as running away at the first sign of danger, screaming and tripping and then begging for mercy, then yes, Mr. Brave man, I guess I'm a coward.”

Shippo giggled and leapt into your lap, “Alright, I guess I can trust you.”

You picked him up and snuggled him against your face, “You are the cutest thing ever!”

He blushed at first, but soon he was just begging for more attention. And you were perfectly willing to give it to him.

“Who’s my wittle smookie pookie moofin? Hm? You are! Yes you are!” you squealed as Shippo basked in your lap.

Inuyasha had been quiet the whole time. You snuck a glance at him and found that he was staring at you from the corner of his eye while he sat perched in a tree.

His golden eyes widened when he realized you were watching him watch you and he quickly blushed and turned away.

Kagome saw the transaction, “Don’t worry. Inuyasha takes a while to warm up to people.”

The half demon growled and jumped from his tree, landing directly in front of you and leaning into your face.

“I was just wondering when she’s going back to her own time,” he spat.

Your bright eyes narrowed and you quickly brought your hand up and gave him a Texan shmack across the face, he fell to the ground twitching as you shook your finger at him.

“Bad dog! No Scooby snack for you!” you said.

Shippo laughed loudly and Inuyasha growled.

Kagome smiled politely, “Well, I think we should take you back. It’s too dangerous for you to be out here.”

Miroku got over his fear of Sango and came back to your side, “Of course Kagome, we should take her home…but first….”

He took up your hand again, “Will you bear my child?”

You blinked, “…No, but we can practice.”

You shrugged off the shocked looks and continued, “Besides, I don’t really want to leave this place anyway. It beats goin’ home.”

“To Texas?” asked Shippo.

You sighed, “Nah, I live in Japan right now, for school an’ all. But that ain’t the point. I just don’t feel like goin’ back. I need a vacation from my life.”

For the moment, you decided not to tell them about you being a Nymph. You spent the rest of the night with them as they told you about them and their mission to collect all the jewel shards…and blah, blah, blah.

You pretty much zoned out after the first five words.

It was later that night, when everyone had fallen asleep that you found yourself restlessly tossing and turning. Finally you huffed and stood up, deciding a short walk would make you tired.

You had barely gotten out of hearing range of the remaining party before Inuyasha took it upon himself to scare the crap out of you by dropping from a branch. You glared at him as he stared sternly at you with his arms crossed over his chest.

“And where do you think you’re going?” he said gruffly.

You cocked your head and you completely ignored what he said and stared at his twitching ears. They roved back and forth on his head, as if picking up every sound the dark forest offered.

He got up in your face when he realized you weren’t paying attention.

“Look, what are you?” he said between gritted teeth.

You blinked your wide blue eyes in confusion as you stared up at him.

“What do you mean?”

Inuyasha took a step closer.

“You’re not human.”

You raised an eyebrow, “Oh?”

He growled lowly, “You can’t be.”

You suddenly realized that he was talking about your skin color. You couldn’t blame him really, it’s not like he had ever seen a black person before.

“Okay, look here Fido,” you said raising your arm for him to see. “Just because I don’t have a nice graveyard tan like everyone else here, it doesn’t mean I’m bad.”

Inuyasha’s ears swiveled forward to catch the sound of your voice as he stared at your arm. But he still seemed unconvinced.

“I’m about ten seconds away from laying the smack-down on yo’ candy ass,” you threatened, balling your fist.

He smirked rudely, “Feh, like you could actually do anything to me!”

You raised an eyebrow and shot your knee up into his groin. Well…you would have, had he not predicted this move and slammed you bodily against a tree. He held you by your upper arms against the trunk so that your feet were dangling above the ground uselessly.

He leered and suddenly dropped you. You fell straight on your ass and yelped in surprise.

Inuyasha laughed and you narrowed your eyes at him, rubbing your sore bum as you went up on your knees.

“Of course you know, this means war,” you said.

A/N: right then, I need serious help here peeps, the idea fountain is trickling into a puddle. Review with ideas for what's to come, i have a basic plot, but I just need fillers along the way.


Devil child: oh I love you hon, I’m right there with ya on that one