Interest

A/N And thanks once again for the comments, here's the last chapter! It's a bit longer, and still a bit rushed, but it does resolve things, relatively. Have a lovely week, ya'll!

Summary: It’s time.
Theme: love


All the following warnings MAY apply to all chapters, but WILL apply at sometime in the story: MPREG, anal, oral, humor, N/C, H/C, hand job, blow job, WAFF, M/M, Rim, Spanking (mild)

Chapter 24 - Love

Women had always held a fascination for Miroku. Their beauty attracted him. The pleasing tones of their speech delighted the ears, even when they rose to higher, angry pitches. And their strength in the face of the lack of control they had over their bodies had always awed him.

And right now, he felt a strong sense of connection. He still didn’t know how women did this, time after time. Growing another life that simply used them as a vessel? No control over what it did to them, or their bodies?

The baby shifted and he laid his hand over the spot.

Then again, he supposed he did understand why, really. The lack of control was something he’d had before, wasn’t it, with the kazaana? But he’d never had such a precious reward at the end of the journey, only the same certain death.

“I think you’re worth it, little one.” Even if he never woke to see it.

The baby shifted again, barely able to move in the tight space that had once solely belonged to Miroku, and then it twitched. Frowning, Miroku looked down at himself. It had been cold today, so Inuyasha had built up the fire, and Miroku’s body had been feeling…achy. But twitching was new.

“Hmmm, what is it, little one? You’re awfully jumpy today.” He directed his question to his stomach and heard Inuyasha snorting from across the room. “Yes, did you have a comment to make?”

“Just funny, seeing you talk to the baby all the time now. You couldn’t even think about it a couple’a months ago, and now all you do is natter on at him like an old woman.”

“You don’t think he can hear me?”

Inuyasha frowned. “’Course not. He’s not even out yet. How would he hear you?”

Miroku smiled, patting the rounded furs over his stomach. “Well, I’ve heard you through tent walls before, and they were made from thicker hide than mine. I would be surprised if he didn’t hear us.” And he’d actually felt the baby startle, once or twice, when Inuyasha had roared in, complaining at full volume.

Inuyasha came over, crouching next to Miroku with wide eyes. He stared at Miroku as if trying to gauge whether a prank was in the making. “You- You’re not just pulling my leg? You really think he can hear us?”

“Yes, I really do.”

“But…does that mean we should have been talking to him this whole time?”

“I don’t believe-“

“I haven’t been talking to him at all. What if he’s been waiting for me to talk to him?”

Miroku was going to try and placate Inuyasha, but he paused before he said anything. Inuyasha looked so…worried. It was rather sweet. Just sweet enough that Miroku didn’t want to let it go just yet. “Perhaps you should start now, then.”

Inuyasha’s ears went down and then he nodded decisively. Pulling down the furs, he moved his head down towards Miroku’s belly tentatively, swallowing, and Miroku tried to hold in his own laughter.

“Uh…hey there, kid. It’s your old man.” Inuyasha paused again, biting his lip, and Miroku almost lost control of his mirth.

There was no way he was going to remind Inuyasha that simply because a baby could hear them didn’t mean it understood what it heard. It might ruin the moment, and Miroku rather wanted to hear what Inuyasha was going to say.

Inuyasha cleared his throat, putting his hand over Miroku’s stomach. “Sorry the world’s kind of a shitty place and all, but it’s not too bad, sometimes. And… and I’ll make sure nothin’ bad happens to you, so you don’t have to worry. Nothing bad is going to happen to you ever when I’m around. Or when your mama’s around, too.”

“Inuyasha, I’m not the child’s mother.”

Inuyasha glanced up at him and smiled once. “Sorry, or when your whiny old man’s around. You’ll be able to tell us apart, don’t worry. Miroku’s the pretty one.”

Miroku flushed, wanting to roll his eyes, but he looked away instead. It was getting harder now, when Inuyasha talked about what would happen after the baby was born.

Harder to keep the smile on his face.

“Between us both, you got no worries. I’ll teach you to fight until you’re the toughest thing out there. Nobody’s gonna give you any shit. And there’ll always be enough to eat. I promise.”

Miroku’s throat closed up on him again. How much had Inuyasha worried about this, when he was small? “Inuyasha…”

“What?”

“It’s… nothing. I’m sure that is all very comforting to an infant.”

Inuyasha stared at him as though suspecting sarcasm. “Kids get hungry and scared. I don’t want a baby of ours to worry about that stuff.”

Laying his hand over Inuyasha’s, Miroku shook his head. “I’m sure the little one will always feel safe and well cared for with you. I’ve no doubt in my mind.” It was one of the things that made Miroku feel more at peace about leaving them both behind.

Inuyasha would take on the gods themselves to protect their babe, if he had to. Miroku was sure of it.

He winced as his entire belly twitched again, every muscle taut.

“Miroku? What the hell was that?”

It twitched again, painfully, and Miroku sucked in his breath. “I-I’m not sure.”

Eyes wide, Inuyasha spread his hands over Miroku’s belly and felt all around it as though it would give him the answer. “Is… The baby’s okay, right? I didn’t scare it or something?!”

“Inuyasha, of course you didn’t frighten the child. It has nothing to do with that. I’m sure it’s simply...aah,” The twitching came again, a hard rock of compression over his entire stomach, and Miroku started to shake. “No. Not right now.”

“What? What is it?” Still crouching, Inuyasha’s body shifted as though readying for an attack.

“I don’t know. It…ah, Buddha’s mercy, it- uhh-“ He started panting, hard, unable to speak as pain washed over his entire body. This wasn’t right! Kaede said labor could take days. It built up, so he had time to say his goodbyes. It wasn’t supposed to be this sudden, overwhelming agony.

Not when Kaede had been called away to help at another village. Hanako had only just delivered her own child; Kaede hadn’t thought Miroku was due for nearly 4 weeks!

“Inuyasha, I think the baby wants to come out.” Miroku shook. He’d thought he had more time. It was so soon…

“Now? The baby’s comin’ now?” Inuyasha froze, then jumped up and ran to the other side of the room, burrowing underneath a pile of furs. He came back with an armful of cloth and herbs that Miroku hadn’t seen before. “Don’t worry, Miroku. I know all about this shit.”

Another pain hit Miroku and he stared blankly, moaning, until it ended. “Wh-what? What are you-“ Inuyasha made a pad of absorbent cloth on the floor, eyeing Miroku as he worked. A bowl of healing herbs was next to him, and Miroku thought he saw cloth for swaddling in the pile as well. “When did you get all this?”

“When I knew you were going to have a baby, dumbass.” At Miroku’s stare, Inuyasha humphed. “What, you think I’m gonna just trust Kaede to be here when you have a baby? She’s old, and she’s human; you guys are too fragile. She coulda popped off and died or somethin’. I’ve been askin’ around for a few months now. Good thing, too, or we’d be in trouble, since Kaede ain’t here!”

Miroku would have answered, but his stomach compressed again. The pain was so huge, it blocked out everything. He blinked as it finally ebbed, staring at Inuyasha. All this time, Inuyasha had been setting this up?

Miroku’s eyes stung as he stared at him. Gods, he didn’t want to tell him what he was going to have to do. And soon. He could feel his stomach compressing, but there was no where for the baby to go. All sensation was pushing into his stomach; nothing was coming out. It would kill the baby, and then it would kill Miroku, unless they got the little one free.

Another pain hit him and he panted desperately, clutching Inuyasha’s hand when it slid against his palm.

They had to get the little one out, now. This was too strong, too fast. They needed to get the baby free now!

“Okay, monk, now the best way is to walk a little, or I can help ya crouch if you need.”

“Inuyasha-“

Inuyasha helped him to his feet while Miroku tried to pull away. “C’mon, you gotta move. It’ll help bring the baby down faster. I know it hurts, but I’m right here, Miroku. I won’t let anything happen to you.”

“Inuyasha, I can’t-“

“Don’t talk like that.” Inuyasha supported Miroku’s entire weight as he made him take a few steps. “You can do this.”

“Inuyasha, stop, you don’t understand!”

“What? I know I never had a baby, but that doesn’t mean I don’t know what to do. Keep moving now. It’s okay. I got you.”

Miroku fell against him as another pain swept him. His first thought was the baby; he couldn’t feel the baby move.

“Inuyasha, stop! This won’t help!”

“Miroku, trust me, I-“

“You have to cut me open!”

Stopping, Inuyasha’s hands tightened over Miroku’s shoulder and back. “Monk, don’t be overdramatic. Women do this all the time. We don’t need to…”

Miroku managed to look up into Inuyasha’s face. He had to make him understand, and right now. He’d never thought he’d have to reveal it all in a situation like this!

“I’m not a woman, Inuyasha.”

“I know that!”

“There’s nowhere for the baby to come out. You need to cut me ope-“ Miroku tried to double over as his muscles contorted around his belly again.

He was on the ground, back in a pile of furs, when he was finally aware of what was going on. Inuyasha’s ears stood straight up, his face pale as he stared at Miroku.

“What do you mean, it has nowhere to come out?”

“Kaede…Kaede checked last month. The baby can’t get out, Inuyasha, not unless we make it a path. I need you to cut it out of me.”

“And how exactly are you supposed to survive something like that, you idiot?” Inuyasha snarled. There was a long pause as Inuyasha paled further, his ears going flat, and Miroku tried to smile. “That’s bullshit! You think I’m going to- to kill you to get the baby out?”

“Inuyasha, I won’t survive with the child still inside, either. I-“ Another pain, another minute of panting and moaning. “Inuyasha, please! I don’t know what this is doing to the baby. We need to get him out!”

“No!” Inuyasha backed away a step, his ears so flat they disappeared against his hair. “You can’t DIE. The baby can’t kill you! It’s Kagome’s wish; it’s supposed to be happy, dammit!”

“Inuyasha…” Miroku couldn’t stop the fact that tears were starting to come, now. “I didn’t wish for long life, Inuyasha. Just the pregnancy. It’s not Kagome’s fault that the jewel chose to grant what I wished for.” Miroku tried to reach out for his hand. “You won’t be alone; you’ll have the baby to care for.”

“I don’t want the fucking baby if you’re not fucking there!”

“Inuyasha, don’t say that.”

“It’s fucking true!”

“No,” Miroku felt another contraction and cursed, nearly screaming before it finally ended. “Inuyasha, you have to care for the baby.”

“Of course I’ll care for the baby, but…you have to, too. Kagome said we were all supposed to be fucking happy, Miroku!”

“And I finally have a child, Inuyasha. That is something to be happy about.”

“Only if you’re here, too!” Inuyasha came back, crouching by Miroku, and his eyes were lost as he reached out and grabbed Miroku’s shoulders, burying his face against Miroku’s hair. “How the fuck am I supposed to be happy if you’re gone?”

Miroku didn’t know what to say. “I- Inuyasha-“

“What the fuck kinda shitty wish is this? You get a baby and it kills you? Bullshit! You hear me jewel, this is bullshit!!” Inuyasha snarled it to the ceiling and Miroku clutched at his shoulders, trying to speak and unable to make any sound but a whimpering moan until another pain passed.

“Inuyasha, please. I’m sorry, but please, the baby…”

Inuyasha held him tighter. “It can’t fucking do this! You damned jewel, you hear me? You can’t do this! You can’t cheat on Kagome’s wish, you fuckin’ evil piece of shit! I want my fucking happy ending, and I can’t have it without the baby AND Miroku! I swear, if Miroku dies, I will find out where your rotten soul is hiding and hunt it down and destroy it, you bastard jewel!”

Miroku gasped again, shaking from the next compression. It felt like something was going to burst inside. He pulled at Inuyasha. His hands felt weak. It was hard to breathe.

“Inuyasha, please…the baby. I don’t know how much more the little one can take.”

Inuyasha looked down at him and Miroku was shocked to see tears in his eyes.

“Inuyasha?”

“Dammit, houshi-“

“I’m sorry. Kaede was going to, so you didn’t have to, but…you’re the only one here. I don’t think we can wait.”

Inuyasha let go of his shoulders, laying him down. “Miroku…dammit. Dammit, dammit, dammit!” But he pulled Miroku’s clothes away from his belly, and Miroku wanted to weep. He didn’t want to put Inuyasha through this, and he hated himself a little that he knew Inuyasha would do the right thing, even if it haunted him.

But the baby needed them both to be strong for this.

“I agree, Inuyasha.” Miroku gasped harshly. “I’m so sorry. I wish…I wish I could have been able to raise the baby with you.”

Inuyasha nodded, putting his hand over Miroku’s naked belly, the skin pale and smooth underneath. “I wish you could, too,” he whispered. “I wish you could stay with me until the day I died and watch the little brat grow up, just so you’d have to deal with all the shit having a little guy with your personality is gonna give me.”

Miroku chuckled. “I think he’ll be more like you. I wish I could see it.” He gasped at another pain, arching up as his muscles locked. His vision went white for a minute until the pain started to ebb again, and he stared at Inuyasha blindly. “You’ll tell him about me, yes?”

“I’ll tell him what a damned lech you are.” Inuyasha’s voice was choked, and Miroku tried to pat his hand.

“Just- do it quickly, Inuyasha. It’ll be easier.”

Inuyasha looked at his claws, and lay them over Miroku’s belly. Miroku closed his eyes. He didn’t want to die, but he wanted his baby to live. He wanted that more than his own life.

And Inuyasha wasn’t doing anything. Miroku spoke without opening his eyes. “Inuyasha, it needs to be now! I don’t know if either of us can survive many more contractions.

“Miroku…y-you’re fucking glowing.”

Eyes suddenly open, Miroku stared, an unmistakable glow coming from his stomach.

“Wha-“

“It heard me. The jewel heard me.” Inuyasha panicked. He picked up Miroku with a heave and left the room, shoving through their door and running out into the snow.

“I-Inuyasha, what are you doing??”

“It heard me! What if it’s trying to take you both away because I yelled at it! I won’t let it. Fuck you, jewel, you can’t take them away!”

“Stop! Stop Inuyasha, please, I can’t breathe when you hold me this tightly.”

Inuyasha stopped at the tree line. It was biting cold, and Miroku shivered almost immediately. “Inuyasha, we can’t run out into the snow like this.” He was starting to feel very strange, his stomach tingling, the pain leaking away, and he stared at it.

And then the glow intensified and the hump in his belly started to go away.

“No!” Miroku clutched at it, trying to do something, and his hand swept right through. It was disappearing! His whole body began shaking uncontrollably, muscles contorting and twisting as his shape began to revert to the way it had been. Before the baby. He couldn’t even scream. It was locked in his lungs, as he could FEEL his baby being taken away. No!

Not his baby! It couldn’t take their baby. His hands were in fists over his stomach, clutching at it, trying to keep it in. It was supposed to be him! Not the baby.

He started gasping as he could move suddenly, harsh, deep sobs and curses as the glow grew brighter and started to withdraw from his body.

“No!!”

Inuyasha held him tightly and howled as he saw the light rising from Miroku’s body. Miroku couldn’t even speak, trying to reach for the light, to pull it back in. It couldn’t take their child…

His hands touched the light, wrapping around it, feeling it. Miroku pulled hard, tugging at the sphere of light desperately, pulling it into his arms. Inuyasha was still howling, clutching Miroku so tightly it hurt, kneeling in the snow, and Miroku clutched the small sphere of light just as tightly. He wasn’t letting it go. The jewel would pry his baby from his cold, dead hands. He wasn’t…

The light faded suddenly, with a flash that was so bright Miroku flinched involuntarily. He didn’t let go, and the warm light that had been in his arms wriggled and suddenly let out a cry.

Inuyasha stopped howling. Miroku’s sight cleared. They both looked down at the naked, slime covered infant clutched to Miroku’s chest, and then met each other’s eyes.

“I- “ Miroku couldn’t speak. He couldn’t think. Their babe was all right. Their baby… Tears came to his eyes and he clutched the small bundle of flesh closer. Slimy and wrinkled and wailing so loudly Miroku couldn’t hear Inuyasha above the noise, their child was the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen.

His chest seized, heat spiking it right through the middle as tiny gold eyes looked up from his chest to glare at him in mid-scream. He started laughing, holding it close, unable to stop, tears leaking from his eyes, until Inuyasha pulled him in closer and kissed him suddenly.

Miroku choked, staring up at Inuyasha as he pulled away. The baby had stopped crying, but started up again as soon as they paused.

Swallowing heavily, Inuyasha looked at it only briefly before running suddenly back to their home, pushing inside and laying Miroku by the fire. Miroku tried to lean back and overcompensated for the belly that was no longer there. He cursed as he started to fall backwards.

Inuyasha caught him before he toppled. Adjusting him, he brought over a warm, soft cloth and wrapped it around the babe, smiling suddenly as he got to the legs.

“It’s a little girl.” He swallowed, beaming. “Serve you right, Miroku. She’s going to give you hell.”

Miroku swallowed the lump in his own throat, trying to smile back and having a hard time managing. A girl. And he was…

He wasn't dead. He was actually going to live long enough to see her grow. “How…”

“How should I know? Fucking wish again?”

“Did I wish?”

“No, dumbass.” Inuyasha cuffed him gently in the back of the head. “I did. I think… Can’t really remember what I said.”

“I remember you cursing the jewel,” Miroku said, cuddling the still crying baby, ignoring the mess over the baby’s skin and wrapping it gently. They would need to get her to Hanako to feed right away.

“Yeah…and I wanted you to be here with me to see the baby grown…”

Miroku smiled, still looking at the bright red face of his child, screaming loud enough to wake the spirits of the dead. She looked a little like Inuyasha in mid-tantrum.

Inuyasha put a hand out, putting a finger into the waving hands, and the baby suddenly stopped, latching on to it and staring up blearily into his eyes. He smiled, wiggling his finger and watching the miniscule hand hang on to it. “She likes me.”

“I think so.”

Then Inuyasha looked up at Miroku and Miroku’s breath caught in his throat again.

At this rate, he didn’t know if he was going to breathe properly for a month.

Looking down at the babe, Miroku tried to collect himself as he gently wiped off her face. He couldn’t believe he was here to see this.

And they’d almost lost her.

Shudders wracked him. With a concerned murmur, Inuyasha wrapped an arm around Miroku’s shoulder. His hand slipped free of the infant’s hand clinging to it and their daughter immediately protested. Glaring, a small set of golden eyes followed Inuyasha’s movement; her face screwed up in a ferocious scowl. She let out a shrill scream that Miroku was sure would resemble Inuyasha’s bellow once she got older.

Miroku had been right; she had Inuyasha’s personality.

Miroku swallowed a chuckle as Inuyasha prodded her small palm with his finger again until she latched back on and quieted.

“Wrapped around her finger already, are you?” Miroku whispered. Inuyasha’s cheeks reddened and he shrugged with hunched shoulders.

“The brat’s loud, that’s all.”

How fascinating. “That’s all?”

Inuyasha flushed a deeper red. He glanced down at Miroku and frowned. “Quit it. You know how I feel; I don’t have to say it out loud.”

Yes, Inuyasha had made that abundantly clear. But there was something utterly charming about his sudden reluctance to express it now that the baby was here.

Inuyasha’s arm pulled Miroku in closer and they both stared down at her.

“I was thinkin’, if you didn’t mind.” He cleared his throat nervously. “Could we… Could we call her Izayoi?”

How perfect. She yawned sleepily; Miroku had never seen anything that looked so perfect and beautiful in his life. “That would be a lovely name.”

Inuyasha grunted, obviously pleased.

“She looks just like you,” Miroku said softly, fingering her hair. Underneath the birthing fluids, it was a pale silvery-white.

“No ears, though.” Inuyasha let go of her hand to cup her head in his palm. “I’m glad. They make everything more difficult.”

Miroku peered up to see the appendages on Inuyasha’s head twitch softly. “I think they’re rather-” Miroku stopped as Inuyasha turned his attention away from the baby. “Uh- attractive.”

Inuyasha stared at him, his eyes glowing faintly. “Yeah?”

“Um…” Miroku quite suddenly realized that he had no idea what to say. He didn’t know what to do after this point. It wasn’t supposed to be like this.

He was supposed to be dead.

Alive, with Inuyasha and their child beside him – he hadn’t allowed himself to think on it. It had been too painful. But with them both here, what should he do?

Would Inuyasha’s youkai have any interest in him now? Or even raising the baby; would Inuyasha want to do this together?

How was Miroku supposed to continue on now, when all the longings that had grown over the past few months weren’t going to die along with him? Dying had brought him low whenever he thought about it, but having Inuyasha reject him now?

That terrified him.

He turned away with a sharp twist of his head. Too jerky; he knew it. He had to act naturally or Inuyasha would be sure to figure it out.

The sweet, grouchy, infant face in front of him helped.

He cleared his throat carefully. “We should get her washed off before we go over to Hanako’s to feed her. Do we still have any of the water left from this morning’s tea? It should still be warm.”

Inuyasha grunted, letting go of Miroku and his daughter both, and came back almost immediately with a small bowl of warmed water and a bit of rag. Miroku cradled the little one in his arm and he unwrapped her a little at a time, wiping as he went. She started fussing almost immediately.

Aside from the reddened cheeks, her skin was pale underneath the chalky slime. Her belly button was healed as though she were months old. No claws, he noticed, but the exotic hair and eyes would mark her as different, if not hanyou. It would be hard to keep the men away from her when she grew up.

“She so beautiful,” Inuyasha murmured, watching them both.

The fussing stopped. Their daughter blinked up at them innocently and Miroku would swear, no matter how impossible it was, he would swear until the day he left this world for the next that she smiled.

Inuyasha clearly saw the same thing. He choked. “Ah hell, she’s just like you.”

“I beg your pardon?”

Inuyasha stroked the baby’s cheek and snickered. “She’s a flirt. She’s got that same twinkly look in her eye you always do.”

“She’s an infant.”

“Yeah, and she’s already a flirt. We’re in deep shit, houshi.”

Miroku smiled to himself at the thought. He wouldn’t mind that, being there to watch her growing up, falling in love. And-

Had Inuyasha realized what he’d just said? “We?”

“Huh?” Inuyasha didn’t look up from his daughter’s face.

“You… You said ‘we.’ I-” Miroku couldn’t continue. Asking outright what Inuyasha thought they would be doing in the future was more than he could cope with today.

“Of course I said we. Who else is gonna raise the little brat?” Inuyasha looked up, eyes bright, and something about Miroku’s face must have struck him because his ears started flattening against his head. “You thought you’d be dead.”

“Yes.”

Inuyasha growled. “We’re still gonna need to talk about that, monk.”

Miroku couldn’t hold his gaze. “I know,” he whispered.

Inuyasha growled again and stepped back. “Is she clean now?”

At Miroku’s nod, Inuyasha plucked her out of his hands and started wrapping her up in furs.

“I’m gonna take her over to Hanako’s, and then I’m coming back for us to talk, monk. Don’t go anywhere.” Miroku nodded and Inuyasha leaned over here, baring his fangs. “I’m dead serious, Miroku. Don’t even think about moving out of the house before I get back. Today’s been a hell of a day; it won’t take much to totally piss me off. Got it?”

Miroku rolled his eyes but he nodded again, watching as Inuyasha left the house with the little one cuddled against his chest.

He spent the next few minutes fretting.

Inuyasha’s fury over Kaede and Miroku’s plans was expected. The hanyou hated to be left in the dark, and he fought tooth and nail to avoid losing someone he cared about. Miroku knew they were close friends; Inuyasha would have grieved for him. He knew that.

Possibly they were even a little more than friends, with what had gone on between them the last few months.

But…Miroku’s feelings had grown even beyond that. He certainly hadn’t planned it; he wasn’t even certain he understood how it had happened. There was no denying, however, that the thought of doing without Inuyasha chilled him down to his core.

And it was over now. The youkai would leave him be; there would be no more sex. Miroku would be back to his own devices if he desired release. Inuyasha might not even wish to share the same house, now that the youkai’s overprotective streak would be ending.

Even with a joyous haze over the fact that he was still alive, and their daughter was whole and well, Miroku still couldn’t fight the sorrow that overlaid it all.

He had never realized how deeply he wanted things to stay the same.

Inuyasha walked in a moment later, before Miroku could blank the pain from his face. He didn’t have the baby with him.

“Where’s-”

“She’s with Hanako. The ningen said it’d be a few minutes before she’s done trying to feed. Won’t be much extra milk for her for a few days until Hanako’s body adjusts. Plenty of time for us to have a little talk.”

The words sounded more like a threat than anything else. Miroku tried to stand and would have fallen without a sudden grab from Inuyasha.

“What’s wrong?”

Miroku managed to answer before Inuyasha started strip searching him. “I’m fine. Inuyasha, stop! I’m fine; I’m not adjusted to my old shape yet, that’s all. My balance is off.”

Inuyasha stared at him and suddenly let go of Miroku’s waist. Miroku’s body started to lurch back for a moment before he was clutched up against Inuyasha’s chest. “Okay, so you’re not lying.”

“Of course I’m not lying!”

Inuyasha growled again. “Don’t act so shocked, monk. You and Kaede been lying to me for months! You were planning to fucking die!” His grip tightened. Miroku could feel the claws through his kesa.

He shoved to get free and grunted as Inuyasha pushed him onto their bedding. Ready to blister Inuyasha’s ears, he caught himself.

Inuyasha was standing over him, fists clenching and unclenching, lungs heaving. His eyes were wild.

Miroku’s stomach fluttered uncomfortably when he realized how much seeing Inuyasha like this – any way at all – mattered to him. He could have missed all this…

It helped him to keep his voice light and gentle. “I didn’t want to die. I simply didn’t think it could be helped.”

Inuyasha growled and crouched down until he was eye level with Miroku. “Well you were fucking wrong, weren’t you!”

“Happily, yes.” And he truly was grateful for it. He never would have seen his daughter, or seen Inuyasha carrying on like a wounded boar again. Like now.

Painful as it was to think of Inuyasha’s lack of romantic feelings for him, to have the chance to see him again? That was worth it.

“Happily? Are you- Gods, Miroku, you’re pissing me off! Don’t you play this off like it was nothing! You fucking lied to me!!”

“I never deliberately lied. I simply-“

Inuyasha shoved hard, knocking Miroku back onto the futon. He was over him in moments, braced above Miroku’s body, snarling.

Miroku hoped Inuyasha had no idea how much it aroused him.

“You knew exactly what I was thinking, and you let me make all my damn plans and talk my ass off while you were planning to go off and die! That’s lying, houshi!”

“I’m sorry,” Miroku said softly. He stared up into Inuyasha’s face, soaking it in. The way the firelight reflected off his eyes, the sharp planes of his face, the sleek fur over his ears. He would have missed this so much.

He still would.

“It’s not that easy, monk! You don’t just get to pull this shit and think nothing’s going to happen!”

“I didn’t think I’d be here for anything TO happen, Inuyasha.” Miroku tried to smile. “But you made it possible. You made the wish, and now I have a chance to see my daughter grow up. I will be forever grateful for that.” Buddha’s mercies, he would thank Inuyasha for this gift in his prayers, every night.

“Grateful? You’re grateful?! Not good enough. You don’t get to decide to fucking leave like that without telling me!” Inuyasha’s voice went into gravel and back as he spoke.

Were those stripes blooming on his cheeks? Miroku swallowed nervously.

“Inuyasha, what are you-?”

“What the hell did you think I was going to do without you?”

“Raise our daughter.”

Inuyasha snarled again, lowering his face to within an inch of Miroku’s. “Without. You. You were going to leave me, just like Kagome.”

“It’s not the same.” Miroku tried to push him away and failed. Inuyasha kept him trapped between his arms, on his back.

“No, it’s worse! At least she told me she was goin’!”

“Inuyasha, it’s not the same thing.” Miroku’s chest hurt even saying it, but he knew it was true. Deep down, no matter how much he wished differently, he knew it was.

“What the fuck is different about it!?”

Miroku clamped his lips shut.

“Answer me.”

“You know quite well what I mean.”

“If I knew, I wouldn’t fucking ask!”

“I’m not having this conversation.” Miroku turned his face away. He might not be able to push Inuyasha off without a fight, but he wasn’t going to address this yet. Could he not have one day to recover before they had to confront this?

Inuyasha’s hand grabbed his chin and turned him back. He was scowling fiercely. “What the fuck are you talking about?”

Miroku scowled back. He wasn’t doing this. Not now.

He yelled as he was lifted in the air and flipped over…on Inuyasha’s lap. How the hell had he moved so fast? And what was he-?

Inuyasha grabbed at the hem of his kesa and started to lift it up his legs. “If you won’t talk one way, monk, I’ll find another way to make you.”

He couldn’t be!

“What do you think you’re doing?”

“What does it look like?”

Miroku felt fabric pulled entirely over his ass and he struggled, growling as loudly as Inuyasha. “Damn you, stop being such a contrary stubborn ass!”

“Tell me what you meant, monk, or I’ll spank you!”

Miroku set his jaw. Inuyasha wasn’t youkai now. He wouldn’t dare.

“Fine. Don’t think I won’t keep at this, though, until you stop lyin’ to me, monk.”

There was a stinging pain over his ass and Miroku gasped. Inuyasha did not just do that. He didn’t just…

Another slap, sharp and burning, hit him on the other cheek.

“Tell me what you meant!” Another sharp slap, and Miroku was horrified to realize he was getting aroused again.

“Stop, Inuyasha!” If he wasn’t youkai, he’d notice. Miroku could bear a lot, but not that, not when it didn’t mean anything to Inuyasha but a means to an end. He couldn’t-

“I’ll stop when you tell me.” Smack.

“Tell me!” Smack.

“Why ain’t it the same?” Smack.

“Because you were in love with Kagome, you damned hanyou!” Miroku sucked in a sharp breath the moment he spoke. His head dropped, forehead touching the floor while he cursed himself silently.

Damn him and his disobedient tongue!

After a pained silence, Inuyasha let him go, moving his hand off of Miroku’s back. Getting onto his knees, Miroku felt more naked than he had with his bare ass exposed over Inuyasha’s lap. Staring down at a stray thread hanging from the seam of the futon, he grit his teeth. He couldn’t stand it.

Raising their child together, knowing the entire time that Inuyasha didn’t feel-

“Like I said, just like Kagome,” Inuyasha said quietly.

Miroku stared at him before he even realized he’d moved his head. “What?”

“You heard me.” Inuyasha stared at him curiously, his ears slowly raising from his head, and he suddenly grinned. That open, feral beaming that Miroku hadn’t seen in weeks. “You tellin’ me you didn’t know?”

“Know? I didn’t- You can’t be serious.” It couldn’t be, could it?

Inuyasha’s ears flattened and Miroku realized what he’d said. “I didn’t mean it like that, Inuyasha. I mean… I didn’t think you…felt that way.”

The ears came up as Inuyasha scowled. “Why the hell wouldn’t I? You don’t think I’d do all this shit for someone I hated, do you?”

“Of course not, but for a friend, you’d-“

“I don’t fuck my friends.”

“And you haven’t. Your youkai-“

“Hasn’t been after your ass for months.”

Miroku could only gape at him. “Wh-What?”

Inuyasha watched him carefully, taking in the heat Miroku could feel in his own cheeks. “You knew that, right?”

“What?!”

“You knew the youkai doesn’t come out much now, right?”

“No!” Inuyasha crossed his arms and Miroku squirmed. “All right, sometimes, yes, but we were already intimate at that point and I didn’t think- I mean…”

Inuyasha stared at him and took a deep breath. “You feel the same thing, right?” His voice was low and growling, but his ears twitched nervously on top of his head.

So blunt. “I-“ Miroku couldn't speak. Inuyasha was watching him, so beautiful it was painful to look at, furious, frustrated…and his ears were starting to twitch nervously.

So easily worried. Miroku smiled helplessly. “Of course.” With Inuyasha standing there so aggressively ready to be denied, what else could he say? He cleared the hoarseness from his throat. “Of course I feel the same way.

“You’re not lying? ‘Cause if you are, I’m tellin’ you right now, you’d better stop. You say ‘yes’ again and you’re fucking stuck with me.”

Miroku swallowed heavily. “Yes, I feel the same thing.” His voice was barely audible, but Inuyasha’s shoulders softened as tension dropped off of him like shed scales.

“Well…good then.” Inuyasha took a deep breath. His body shook once, and then he seemed to gather himself together. “So what the fuck are you doing giving me all this shit?”

Inuyasha reached out and grabbed Miroku, pulling him in close to hug him against his chest. “Don’t know why you always have to be such a pain in the ass, houshi.”

Miroku let the feel of Inuyasha’s arms around him soak in. Better than sunlight on naked skin. Miroku felt so warm he should have been melting against the furs. “Habit?”

Was this real? He hadn’t truly died giving birth to the little one and this was some form of the afterlife? Inuyasha…

“Well stop it. Your kid’s gonna be hard enough to raise without your bullshit.”

“My bullshit.” Miroku chuckled quietly. Somehow he didn’t think there would be this much cursing if he were already dead.

Inuyasha scowled. “You know what I mean. Thinking that I don’t- All this time, that it’s just been fucking? Well, that’s just stupid.”

Somehow, the fact that Inuyasha wouldn’t say it made it more believable. Miroku wasn’t dreaming. He wasn’t dead.

Miroku had a child, and the man who’d wormed his brash, irritating way into Miroku’s being seemed to feel the same way he did.

“I suppose you’re right. I’ve been very, very stupid.” Miroku turned around and stared up into Inuyasha’s eyes. He could feel his cock start to stir. “Or maybe I’ve been bad. Perhaps you should punish me, hmmm?”

Inuyasha flushed a moment and then he grinned so wide his fangs gleamed. “I think I’ll just fuck you blind.”

Miroku sucked in a gulp of air. His eyes fell to Inuyasha’s groin. “You will?” He couldn’t catch his breath all of a sudden.

“Oh hell yeah.” Inuyasha reached around Miroku’s body and pulled him in close, hands clamped over his backside. “Fuck you until you come. And then we go get Izayoi. I’m not okay with her staying over there, got it?”

Miroku smiled, leaning forward and kissing Inuyasha’s jawline. “Of course not. A family should stay together.”

“Damn right.”

Happiness bubbled up and Miroku could barely speak through it. He couldn’t figure out how this had happened. He was alive, his child was well and healthy, and Inuyasha had somehow been caught by the same closeness that had ensnared Miroku.

Life couldn’t be any more perfect.

“But I'm not changing any of those damn diapers. You want those on Izayoi, you can change them yourself.”

Miroku pressed his face against Inuyasha’s hair and laughed until Inuyasha finally kissed him to shut him up.

Perfect.