UnBound Memories

A/N: To my reviewers, szaugglaughs, glad you liked the lemon, sorry for the cliffy. People call me a machine for how fast I update my FMA story, but let me say you amaze me with the number of quality stories you are writing, continuously updating so that readers can't complain... too much. Lady Laran, I am sorry for the cliffhanger, but I had to do it, though I appreciate that you have reviewed and have been reading. TenshiYoukai, I know, the secret from Miroku was a little cruel, but I figure that it wasn't entirely for his protection, which I explain here. luvsjazz, I'm pleased you gave my story a try. vampress, you're right that Miroku had a sense of what was going on, even if he didn't know.

Chapter 20

Tears

Sesshomaru pulled himself away from his lover, quickly making his way to Tenseiga, which he could feel throbbing in the corner. For once, he was at a loss for what his sword was trying to tell him. It was possible that it was merely letting him know it had the capability to save Miroku, which would break their mating once his lover was brought back from the dead. This would only lead to a second attempt and probable death for Miroku, as the sword can only bring someone from the grips of death once.

Still, even with these thoughts lingering, it didn’t matter. If it meant he would have to stay away from the former monk forever in order to keep the man alive, even forcing them to remain on opposite continents, he would do it; he would suffer it.

Sesshomaru leapt from the bed, grabbing Tenseiga, which still held the jewel of the four souls. The power coursing off of the thing was greater than the demon lord had ever experienced before from the sword, even when it had restored his arm or returned Kohaku to life. It made him hope that, perhaps it could do more than simply bring his love back to life once Sesshomaru’s blood had completed its work. The inu stood over Miroku, waiting for the time to move, waiting for the sword to show him, as the former monk continued to writhe in pain.

Nearing the final stages of his death, the violet eyes shot open, seeming to see Sesshomaru poised over top of him. A creamy arm darted out and the hand grabbed hold of Tenseiga’s blade, as a blinding light filled the bedroom and threw the naked former monk back on the bed. Sesshomaru tossed his sword to the ground, crawling into the bed to cradle the man in his arms.

“Baka, why did you do that?” Sesshomaru asked no one, startled to actually receive an answer.

“I could read your thoughts. You thought it would break our claim.”

Sesshomaru lowered the man’s head from the shoulder where he was clasping him, looking down into fluttering violet eyes. “And that was truly worth recklessly grabbing hold of Tenseiga? You do realize it has a mind of its own as of late?”

“I was counting on it.” Miroku began kissing at Sesshomaru’s bare neck.

“Please cease what you are doing.” The dark head moved back and looked up at Sesshomaru. “You may not feel so inclined to be affectionate when you realize how I have deceived you.” Sesshomaru pulled Miroku up onto his folded knees, still afraid to let the smaller man go, even if what he was about to say would make the former monk hate him forever. “Miroku, you are an intelligent man…”

“Are you trying to flatter me?” Miroku thought, raising an eyebrow in classic Sesshomaru fashion.

“I merely say that you understand that we have been driven to mate one another since the blood bond.” Miroku only nodded. “When Kouga said that two sharing a blood bond such as ours was rare, he spoke the truth. It happens very infrequently and in only one situation: when the two are true mates.”

“The demon equivalent of soul mates,” Miroku said, at least seeming to understand the term.

“Once my youkai and your soul realized we were meant to be together, there was nothing we could do to stop it.” Sesshomaru brushed aside the black fringe of hair with his claws.

“And though Kouga has a wealth of knowledge on the demon world, it is nothing compared to your own, so you obviously knew,” Miroku said, his hand grabbing hold of Sesshomaru’s at his hair. “Why did you keep me in the dark concerning this information?”

“For the reason that I told the others.”

“Others who?” Miroku held Sesshomaru’s hand tightly in his own.

“Kouga and Jaken, originally, but Kouga had informed Shippo and InuYasha. That is the reason that Kouga persuaded Lord Kagewaki to make an attempt at your Sango.”

“He persuaded? Why that lousy--”

“The ookami is obnoxious at his best, but is a romantic at his heart and was seeking to remove obstacles for us. In his own overbearing way.” Sesshomaru wiggled his hand from Miroku’s wrapping it around the former monk’s waist as he propped Miroku up against himself. “With your kazaana, you were determined to procreate, without questioning that such an act would essentially guarantee your death because it was part of the curse, part of your fate. I felt certain that you would have mated with me because it was a fulfillment of your fate.”

“So you wanted to protect me?” Miroku asked, eyes narrowing.

“If you acted because you knew you were destined to, it would have been a cold and forced act.” Breathing deeply, Sesshomaru closed his golden eyes. “I am weak and have been selfish.”

“You wanted me to love you before this happened.” Miroku’s left hand cupped Sesshomaru’s cheek.

“As I have said, I was selfish. Your life was in danger and you had no idea.”

Miroku ran his hand back, rubbing a thumb over Sesshomaru’s ear, then once again pressing his lips to the demon’s neck. “I knew I was taking my own life in my hands. True, I had no idea what drove me on, but I was aware of the possible consequences.”

“How can you forgive me so easily?” The demon asked as he held the man closer.

“I have not forgotten all of my teachings as monk, Sesshomaru.” Miroku moved himself within the taiyoukai’s grasp so that he was kneeling in front of the demon, who noticed the man seemed somewhat taller. Miroku placed his hands at both sides of Sesshomaru’s face.

Miroku wouldn’t say it, not with words, so he pressed his lips to the inuyoukai’s, then pulled away to watch the surprise in Sesshomaru’s eyes. There was still so much pain in the demon’s mind, though he continued to try to fight its appearance on his face. Looking at the demon brought to mind Sesshomaru’s words when they had first started, “I need you to make this different.” Methodical and forced was not the memory Sesshomaru needed to create with a mate for life. He needed it to be affectionate and full of passion, tender and desired by both of them.

Miroku pressed his bare body up against Sesshomaru’s, embracing him beneath the long white braid. He understood, and knowing Sesshomaru was inside his own head as much as he was in his mate’s, Miroku didn’t concern himself with saying why aloud.

“Promise me something, Sesshomaru,” Miroku said as he felt strong arms surround him. “Promise me that you will never call yourself weak to me because you actually experience emotion. It is this Sesshomaru that I love. If he is afraid or angry or sad or pleased, I love him all the same.”

“And I you.”

Content, Miroku pulled the braid into his hands, removing the wrap at the bottom and releasing the beautiful silver hair before he felt searing pain in his forehead.

“Miroku?” Sesshomaru said as Miroku pressed his head to Sesshomaru’s shoulder, hissing as he drew in breaths through clenched teeth. Finally, Miroku managed to pull away, touching his forehead. Sesshomaru traced a clawed finger in a semi-circle on the forehead, giving Miroku a good guess at what was now there.

“The mark,” Sesshomaru said, “you bear the crescent moon. If the Tenseiga did not destroy our claims on one another, then what did it do to make you capable of accepting my blood?”

Miroku slid from the bed and stood in front of the mirror, seeing that he now had a blue crescent moon to match the one Sesshomaru had on his right palm. He also examined the four perfect puncture marks at the base of his neck, knowing they would remain as long as the moon was on his forehead.

"Aside from the marks you've put on me, I do not look different, nor do I feel different."

"Something must have changed," Sesshomaru said from the bed. "Your blood is still affecting me."

The trip from bed to mirror hadn’t been a long one, but Miroku realized the beginnings of just how sore he was bound to be the next morning. Still, despite the growing ache at his backside, Miroku couldn’t deny that he still had a great deal of energy, the pain from the blood exchange gone and leaving him only with the feeling that he wanted to be with Sesshomaru again.

"And how is that?" Miroku asked, looking at Sesshomaru, who had changed his position, sitting at the foot of the bed, feet outstretched. Joining him on the bed, the man began to crawl over the taiyoukai’s legs.

"I feel like spiders have entered my veins."

"Then I am grateful for whatever it is that Tenseiga has done for me. Thanks to Naraku, I have a serious dislike for spiders."

“My mate,” Sesshomaru said as Miroku neared his chest, kneeling, straddling over the man’s thighs. He wrapped his right arm around Sesshomaru’s neck, nuzzling his head beneath the demon lord’s chin.

“I never imagined I would ever be beta to a male demon,” Miroku said, not moving.

“You are no beta.” Sesshomaru spread his hands on Miroku’s back. “I told you days ago that we are equals.” Miroku felt the weight of the inu’s head resting on his own. They sat there, holding one another for some time, the shock of Miroku’s near-death wearing off, the warm feeling of their bodies meshed together taking over.

It lasted so long, that feeling, that moment, that it nearly startled the former monk when he felt Sesshomaru’s large hands moving on his back, claws scratching, but not breaking skin. His own hand wrapped itself in the silver strands at the nape of the demon’s neck.

He turned his head and looked to the mark on Sesshomaru’s shoulder, it was jagged, with two semi-circles from all of Miroku’s teeth clenching into the flesh. It was far less elegant--if a bite wound can be called such--than the one on his own shoulder. He traced over the wounds, which were already healing faster than the mark on Miroku’s neck and shoulder. At the mere touch of his fingers, Miroku heard Sesshomaru make a noise akin to purring.

“Are they that sensitive?” Miroku asked with a half-smirk. He tried not to look too startled when he felt the demon’s member beginning to rise of its own volition.

Sesshomaru made no answer, but moved a hand behind the man’s back to clasp over the mark he’d put on Miroku. The sensation nearly made him melt into his mate’s arms and drove other feelings directly to his groin.

Sesshomaru tilted his head downward, kissing Miroku squarely on his mouth, then moving to attack the monk’s lower lip, clasping it lightly between his teeth as he pulled back, stretching the swelling lip just slightly before releasing it. Miroku then pulled Sesshomaru down, meeting the demon’s lips, darting a tongue out, tracing the crease between the lips. The inu opened his mouth, allowing Miroku to thrust his tongue inside, tracing it over the sharp fangs, rubbing over the soft pink organ inside.

The former monk hardly noticed as Sesshomaru began to pull them both onto the bed, placing Miroku on top. He had, however, noticed that he was being given all of the control in their kiss and allowed himself to enjoy the opportunity to be dominant. He began moving his hands over the perfectly sculpted chest, still exploring the hot, wet cavern with his tongue. Beneath him, Sesshomaru was moaning and growling, his hands moving on Miroku’s back.

Reluctantly, Miroku pulled away.

“Sesshomaru, I believe we are about to repeat ourselves.” The man looked down at his mate, silver hair cascading over the bed, eyes half-lidded, lips upturned in a near-smile.

“Repetition can be a good thing,” Sesshomaru said. “But you are still in pain from our previous efforts.” Miroku was prepared to argue, but Sesshomaru only shook his head, apparently having heard Miroku’s inner protests. “I am merely suggesting a slight modification in position.”

Miroku’s eyes widened, and he looked down at the perfect creature beneath him. “Sesshomaru, are you certain?” The white head nodded as the clawed hand purposefully brushed against Miroku’s mating mark, bringing him to full attention.

The former monk moved from his position with either leg at Sesshomaru’s side. Now kneeling to the demon’s right, kissing and licking the creamy skin, he allowed his right hand to move its way downward, detecting the sticky mess left from their mating an hour before. He let his fingers thread through the nest of white curls before caressing the demon’s impressive length upward, keeping his strokes at a smooth and tormenting pace. As the demon spread his legs, the man moved to straddle the right thigh as his mouth proceeded to nip at the soft tan nipples on those muscled pecs.

With his left hand, Miroku caressed the demon’s face, rubbing over the markings on each cheek. He saw the matching ones on the hands that clutched to the bedding. His hand continuing to pump, he examined the marks on the demon’s waist and hip, the only ones not matching, the marks from the demon’s pregnancy with InuYasha.

For just a moment, Miroku thought back on how hard he’d fought to have a child of his own, realizing that there was no way that was a possibility anymore. As a human male, he could never carry a child, and as a demon lord, his mate could never be allowed; it was enough of a risk knowing that Sesshomaru bore marks from his previous pregnancy. Miroku fought back the brief sadness at that thought, returning to bringing pleasure to his demon mate.

“You are unhappy.”

“It is nothing.”

Miroku dipped his tongue into the demon’s naval, moving his hand to the testicles beneath the shaft, rolling them in his palm before moving his fingers to the sensitive area of skin behind them. He could feel Sesshomaru’s body tensing, but could sense that the taiyoukai wished for him to continue. Miroku pulled from the demon for a moment, trying to find the bottle of oil he’d used earlier. His fingers were still covered in enough lubricant that he felt he would not hurt Sesshomaru, but Miroku was taking no risks.

Finding the flexible bottle beneath a pillow, Miroku leaned back to Sesshomaru and poured the substance over the inu’s exposed entrance, feeling Sesshomaru’s trembles both inwardly and outwardly. Being connected like they were, Miroku could feel each sensation he evoked in the demon as though it was his own.

The former monk returned his ministrations near the demon’s entrance, trying to convey to his mate his love and strength. He massaged around the puckered hole, trying to ease the fear he could feel coming off of his mate in waves.

I’m going to push inside. Miroku did as he’d warned, pressing a finger just past the ring of muscles, slowly pressing more and more of the digit inside of his partner. All the while, he continued to kiss and caress Sesshomaru’s body. Miroku moved his hand down to Sesshomaru’s slightly deflated member, rubbing it to bring it back to its former firmness while he began to move his finger inside of the demon. He could sense the pain from Sesshomaru was fading, and so he moved the finger out nearly completely, joining it with a second. Almost against the demon’s will, his body arched in fear and the slight pain of the intrusion of the two fingers. Miroku held them in place as he buried his face in Sesshomaru’s neck, kissing and licking near his jagged claiming mark.

“I love you Sesshomaru.”

The lithe body sunk back onto the bed as the former monk kissed at his mark. Sensing calm from the demon, Miroku pushed his fingers inside of the demon’s entrance, doing so slowly, continuing his work on Sesshomaru’s member. Knowing that until Sesshomaru could feel something good from those two fingers embedded in him he would not enjoy this experience, Miroku searched inside of his mate for the spot that had made him see stars and feel as though he was going to die of sheer pleasure.

As his fingers brushed across something inside of Sesshomaru, the demon howled and emitted such feelings of rapture that Miroku thought his own legs would buckle entirely beneath him. He’d found the spot and if what he was sensing was any indication, it felt good.

“Was that what I struck in you?”

“Apparently.”

“Do it again.

Miroku slid his fingers again over that spot, forcing not only another howl out of his mate, but a pleasured moan from his own lips. He tried to concentrate to use his fingers to stretch the hole, scissoring them and occasionally pausing to bring both himself and his lover pleasure as he placed pressure on the bundle inside. He added a third finger, this time, moving his hand to thrust and retract those fingers from his mate, occasionally brushing the spot, forcing Sesshomaru to move his hips downward to meet the fingers’ thrusts. Miroku carefully added a forth finger, remembering that three had not been nearly enough to prepare himself for Sesshomaru, and he took no risk in bringing back unpleasant memories for his mate.

Knowing that he could last no longer, practiced breathing techniques or not, Miroku moved himself between Sesshomaru’s thighs, pouring the oil over his length as he was lining up the head of his own neglected sex to Sesshomaru’s entrance. He tried to be careful as he lifted up the demon’s hips, trying not to imbed his fingers too deeply into the soft skin at the hips.

“Are you ready?” Miroku asked aloud as he felt the fear once again radiating from his mate. Sesshomaru nodded. “It will still hurt, but I promise you it does feel better.”

Miroku pressed himself past that ring of muscles so that the head of his cock was just inside of the inu lord. He nearly cried himself when he saw that Sesshomaru was shedding tears at the intrusion, tears that in the bright light of the full moon were obviously pink with blood. Why, after all the affection and love that Miroku was showing him, were the tears still stained with blood?

Miroku waited for the muscles surrounding his member to adjust before inching in very slowly, gradually sheathing himself in Sesshomaru’s heated body. It was an agonizingly slow process, but he wanted those tears to stop. He wanted this to be enjoyable. All the while, he leaned over Sesshomaru, placing kisses on the long neck, distinct collar bones, and muscular shoulders until he worked his way up to the demon’s jaw then to his mouth.

“You may move,” Sesshomaru thought to Miroku, in a tone nearly that of a command.

The former monk moved his hips back, sighing at the feeling of the friction around his member, hearing Sesshomaru grunt in return. He thrust forward, somewhat slowly, focusing on trying to aim toward that spot inside of Sesshomaru that had sent such pleasure through them both. Finally, after a few thrusts, he felt Sesshomaru wrap his legs around Miroku’s waist, pulling him deeper and allowing him to finally strike that bundle of nerves inside, forcing the taiyoukai’s spine to curve upwards.

“Miroku!”

The former monk knelt down, moving faster into the demon’s heat, every few thrusts striking over that wonderful place that made the demon’s body twist, forcing howls from his mate. All the while, it made Miroku’s arms go weak on either side of the demon’s body. Striking it again, his arms collapsed, the weight of his body pressing him down against his lover’s.

“Oh, blessed Buddha, this is fantastic,” Miroku thought before thrusting harder into his lover.

Sesshomaru’s hands finally moved from their spot on the mattress, wrapping around the back of the man’s neck, lacing themselves in the dark hair, his legs locking tighter around Miroku as they neared climax.

Miroku moved as fast and as hard as he could manage, his legs smacking against Sesshomaru’s body each time, until with one final, hard thrust, he slid over that pleasure area inside of Sesshomaru.

Feeling his own ecstasy mingled with Sesshomaru’s, realizing that the demon was feeling the same, Miroku buried himself entirely into the demon, crying out his lover’s name, hearing his own name howled by the inuyoukai. He felt the muscles surrounding him tightening around him, milking his orgasm out of him as he felt warm liquid shooting out between their bodies. He released deep inside of Sesshomaru, kissing at his mating mark on the demon, breathing heavily as he sunk boneless on top of the large inu.

Miroku looked up, finding those unconscious tears streaming down Sesshomaru’s face. Had he not made it different enough? Had the most mind-blowing sex of his life only been pain for his lover?

He looked at the light from the moon on the beautiful demon’s face as Miroku gently withdrew. He realize that the tears were clear. The blood was gone.