Fight or Flight

InuYasha stared into the darkness of the cave.  He couldn't look at Sesshoumaru. He couldn't look at his freshly washed clothes either.  It seemed that every time he did, he felt worse.  He didn't think about the fact it had been days since he'd last tended to his needs.  All he could think about was how he wet himself like a child.  And worse, it wasn't just in front of Sesshoumaru.  No... scratch that.. ON Sesshoumaru.   He was puzzled on why he wasn't dead yet.

 

Sesshoumaru watched his brother.  He wasn't angry with him, or even the situation.  They had been fighting a demon, and at the final hit, the demon died, and they fell into a deep chasam.   He couldn't blame InuYasha for any of it, and he didn't.  He didn't even blame himself.  It was just something that happened and neither of them could have done anything to stop it.

 

He was glad for the women in the village.  They washed their clothes without any comment... even helped both men wash their hair and provided them with soft yukatas to wear while thier clothes dried.  He got up and went over to InuYasha and sat down beside him.  The young man was so wrapped up in his thoughts he didnt even know he was there until he wrapped his arms around him.  InuYasha flinched, then relaxed against Sesshoumaru.

"Gonna make sure I'm comfortable before you kill me."  Sesshoumaru ignored his brother's outburst, but continued to hold him with a quiet gentleness.  InuYasha took Sesshoumaru's quiet reply as an answer and slowly relaxed.

 

"I know you are upset about what happened.  I hope you realize that you are not alone in the indignity.  I accepted what happened as one thing that even  I could not control.  There are things that even I cannot escape as a living being.  I hope you understand that I am not angry and why."

 

InuYasha thought a long time on what Sesshoumaru said.  He sighed as he relaxed more agianst his brother's chest.  He wasn't too sure of his current change of heart, but took it as a welcome sign.  Spending the past day or so pressed aginst each other gave them time together.   If Sesshoumaru really wanted him dead, he could have killed him at any time, but he didn't.  If InuYasha hadn't been  sitting and leaning back, Sesshoumaru's next  admission would have made him fall over.

 

"You have to admit though.. it did feel good to finally go.  I would have liked a little more control myself.. at least to get my clothes off."  Sesshoumaru's voice sounded weary. "If you had been hurting as bad as I was..."  Sesshoumaru's hand slipped through InuYasha's dark locks.  

InuYasha thought on this for a while.  Sesshoumaru's fingers gently working in his hair was slowly lulling  him to sleep.   He blinked as he thought, trying to stay awake.   His older brother was right.  No matter when over the past couple of days either had tried, the results would have been the same.  But, the fact was, InuYasha knew they were both completely horrorfied it happened.

"Well.. It doesn't stop me from feeling like an idiot.  Though.. I think if I had a choice in the matter in where it happend or who I was around  .. I would choose you."  InuYasha leaned forwared and turned to look at Sesshoumaru.  "Miroku would never let me live it down... I don't know about Shippou.  Kagome and Sango would probably be like the women who helped us."

Sesshoumaru nodded.  He in a way was glad that it was InuYasha who witnessed the event.  Neither would breathe a word of it to anyone else... nor use it as a taunt in battle.  He knew InuYasha was more than likely baffled at how cool he handled things.  The truth was, there wasn't any reason to get upset.  It wouldn't change things.

He noticed that InuYasha was slowly falling asleep, though he kept fighting it.  The past week had been a trial in trust.  They had to work together in order ti defeat a demon that had been stalking  the lands.  The defeat  was a relief, but spending the rest of that day and the whole next day  trapped wasn't so nice.  Sesshoumaru knew even if he'd had been alone, he'd have to be careful getting out of the crevice.  Having time to relax  now was welcome.  He wanted to spend a little bit of time bonding with  InuYasha. 

As if the younger man was poked, he groaned and sat up.  He streatched then stood and walked into the darkness.  Sesshoumaru moved to get Mokomoko and fixed a place to lay down.  He waited for InuYasha to return before following his example....