Funny Shorts

(Again no specific pairings... rated pg 13)

 

2. Lumps

 

Kagome was raging mad, and embarrassed. Somehow all the clothes she had were destroyed. The day before yesterday her sailor uniform got ruined by demon beetle guts, yesterday demon vines ripped her cute outfit to sheds, including her bra too, Kagome almost cried at that. Then today Shippou found her lighter, and lit her bag on fire by accident, somehow burning only her clothes! Kagome really did cry after that. All she had left her her pajamas which weren't much to begin with. It was a really really hot summer, so all she wore was little satin shorts, and I mean little, and a cute matching satin top, also little. Kagome was pretty much blushing all day.

 

It didn't help that not only was there Inuyasha and Miroku, but Kouga just so happened to stop by today, and didn't leave.

 

Lucky for Kagome though, they were walking in a rarely traveled piece of forest, so there was no one else to see her. Although it was still unnerving knowing that all three men were staring at her ass. How did she know? Because they had all three decided to walk BEHIND her! She could hear Kouga's panting. For the hundredth time that day Kagome and Sango turned to glare at the men, not that it succeeded making them stop. Sango had pretty much beaten all three to a pulp, but not one could take their eyes off the almost naked miko.

 

It was noon now, and boiling hot, even through the trees. Kagome could feel herself slowly being sunburned, and decided to use her feminine advantage. "Oh, boys..." She batted her lashes at them, Sango looked at her confused. "It's soooo hot, could we find someplace to rest until it cools down?" All three said "Yes Kagome!" And sped off in different directions looking for the perfect resting spot for their scantily clad lady. A second later Kagome and Sango busted up laughing, they laughed so hard they were in tears. Maybe her day was looking up?

 

Inuyasha came back first, showing her a place with way too many rocks, and no where to sit down. The girls refused, Inuyasha's ears flattened to his head, sad. Next was Kouga, who led her to a swamp, there were too many bugs, and no where to sit, again. The girls refused, Kouga and Inuyasha started to bicker. Finally Miroku came back, grinning like a fool, sticks in his arms. "Ladies, I found the perfect spot. You two! find something soft for the ladies to sit on." Quickly the bickering demons went to find something "soft".

 

Miroku led the way, to a cave. The girls were at first joyful, somewhere to get out of the sun. But then problems arose. "It's so dark in there, how will we see?" Asked Kagome. "It will be fine dear lady, for a brought firewood." Sango asked a different question. "How do we know nothing lives in that cave?" Miroku chuckled at the intelligent question from the slayer, but he had already tested that. "It's fine, I already scouted the cave, empty, clean, and big enough for all of us easily."

 

Inuyasha and Kouga came back, Inuyasha held a giant sack of feathers, Kouga covered in dirt, large pieces of soft moss. The girls ogled the smiling males. "Should we know where those feathers came from?" Sango looked at Inuyasha suspiciously. "Don't ask." Was his gruff reply. Miroku told the girls to stay put for a minutes while the boys set up the cave for them.

 

All three emerged moments later pleased as pie with themselves. With a bow and a "ladies first" Sango took the lead. As the two women stepped into the dark entrance, they were warned. "The passage is long and dark, but opens up in the back, it's dark here but the fires going at the end." For a minute they walked in, going slowly, for they were blind in the darkness.

 

Then Kagome felt a collective breathe, the next thing she knew she was being yanked back into many arms, feeling their way along her body. One pair of clawed hands grabbed her breasts tightly. Another set grabbed her ass and started to massage gently, these weren't clawed, and one hand had a rosary. The third pair went straight down her panties, and started to rub her very very sensitive area.

 

For a moment she let it happen completely in shock, then she came to. "GET OFF!!!!!" Kagome screamed it as loud as she could, the cave intensifying it, echoing. The hands melted off, needing to protect their ears. Kagome gave a short frustrated scream, facing the perverts she couldn't see. "Men!! Your all demons!! All of you!! AHHHH!!!"

 

With that she stomped off into the dark taking a very confused Sango with her.