Unwanted

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Chapter two
Tears of Shame

Body screaming in pain, Kagome laid on the rock where he left her motionless, crying silently to herself. She has never experienced pain as intense as this, she hurt in places she had never known before. Her mind had shut down while he was using her body, trying to escape the feeling of helplessness due to his actions. She knew her body was badly cut up, she could feel the blood flowing from the wound he inflicted on her shoulder and neck. Her mind barely registered what had happened to her, she could not think.

Kagome slowly moved off of the rock and back into the warm water, she needed to bath. She need to wash his touch away from her skin, she needed to wash his seed from her thighs. While she was scrubbing herself she could only think of one thing

‘Why?’

0ooo0

Deep within the western lands, a tall silver haired inuyoukai lay, eyes closed on his futon, sleeping peacefully. As his consciousness slowly surfaced he found something to be strange. Never in all his life had he woken up after his heat to the feeling he was now experiencing. His blood was flowing lazily through his veins, in total contentment. Normally, his blood would be pounding like a rapid river filled with adrenalin from the night before. He knew he spilt a lot of blood, he could smell it on his claws, but that however was not his problem.

His problem was not the smell of blood on his claws, but a scent of a different kind. He did not know what the scent was because he had never smelt anything like it [never having being with a human he does not know what the scent is. I am assuming it is different from youkai females.] Pushing the thought out of his mind, he sighed inaudibly. ‘I must have killed an awful lot of beings to feel the way I do right now,’ he mused as he swung a leg over the bed, before standing in one fluid motion.

Lord Sesshomaru of the Western Lands was an unmated male who felt none were worthy of him. He was a loner and liked it that way. He was never one for idle chatter and would not participate in it. He despised the spring time, the one time of year when he did not have total control over himself. He is a very desirable male among his kind for a couple reasons, his looks and title are only two.

He was confident and probably the most powerful youkai of all Japan. He was possessive to a fault and would not relinquish what he believes to be his, and would fight to the death to keep it. He was fiercely protective to those few he allows within his life, no matter how few. He was honorable and prideful, his ego was unmatched. He was arrogant, but never uncouth, and most of all he prides himself on his control. Which was why he hated the spring!

Walking towards the shoji screen he slid it open. He knew he had a lot of work to do today

‘Damage control,’ He thought disgustedly. It was not the thought of killing so many that disgusted him. What disgusted him was that he had no control, hell, he could not even remember what happened. No matter how hard he tried he kept coming up with nothing.

“Jaken,” his baritone voice sounded, calling to his retainer who was sitting on the floor outside of his study.

Jaken jumped at the sound of his lord’s voice.

“Y-yes Milord?” asked Jaken nervously. He had enough experience with his lord in the 100 years he spent as his loyal retainer to know that he would not be in a good mood after his heat. He silently hoped that he could make it through the day without getting stepped on.

“I want a full report on the damage caused before the end of the day,” His commanding voice sounded, he knew he didn’t need to go into detail. Jaken would know what he wanted.

“Yes Milord right away,” Jaken replied, before scurrying off quickly to do as he was bid.

Walking into his study, he sat behind his western style desk, piled high with parchments he had neglected to sign or just plainly did not want to. It was not because he lacked in his lordly duties, he just felt he had more important things to do then to read about some farmers land disputes.

It was only in times like this that he gave the word mate any thought. The Lady of the castle would be the one who took care of all the inconsequential paper work such as small land disputes. The lady actually had a lot of influence within the lands, the lady is the mother of the lands. When one thinks of the work the Lady of the Lands did, they thought of the lands as her pup.

She would nurture the lands as she would her pup, tend to it as she would her male and make sure the lands are producing all that would be needed, and end small disputes like a mother would to quarreling siblings. So the fact of the matter is, he has not found a female that would fit into that category. All the youkai bitches he had the displeasure of meeting where only interested in the power or riches it would allow, not the care of him or the lands.

He would not now, nor ever, enter into a mating of convenience. It held no appeal to him, because he did not need it. The West was strong and wealthy, he did not need to mate a female of the courts to gain more wealth or power.

Closing his eyes and massaging the bridge of his nose, he sighed

‘Every year like clock work.’ he thought distastefully. Every year these thoughts would worm their way into his brain and he mulled over the options of getting a mate. And every year he realized there are none worthy of him, because he deserved nothing less then the best. He deserved perfection, after all he was perfection.

0ooo0

Stepping out of the hot springs Kagome bent down to pick up her clothes, quickly dressing. She was still in shock, she could not believe what had just happened to her, nor could she believe who it was that did it to her. Never in all her years could she have ever imagined that Sesshomaru would do that to her, or that he would want to in the first place. She knew he was not himself, she could tell by the look in his face.

Kagome closed her eyes as a flash of red eyes swam in her vision, her shoulders shook uncontrollably with fear and sorrow as she began to sob again.

‘Why me? Why him?’ she thought. Looking to the sky as if she was searching for the answers, finding none, tears streamed down her face, her lower lip quivered. She felt dirty, even after she scrubbed herself raw. She was afraid to go back to camp, knowing that Inuyasha would smell it and the questions that would surely come after.

Kagome was not ready to face that problem yet, so with her mind set she decided her best course of action would be to go home. She would need to see the doctor to make sure nothing had been fatally damaged last night. The walk would be a long one, this she knew, but at the moment could not bring herself to care. She just wanted to get away before she was forced to explain what happened. She could already see Inuyasha’s face as she told him.

0ooo0

It took Kagome the rest of the evening and night to make it back to the well. She was relieved when she came upon the familiar surroundings of the clearing. The comfort it provided her, to know she was almost home, but not at the same time. When her eyes landed on the well she broke into a full run, intent on getting home as fast as she could.

As Kagome jumped into the well, the familiar blue light began to shine throughout the well, signaling the time slip she was currently passing through. A relieved sigh escaped her lips as the light faded. Looking up and seeing the hut roof, she smiled.

“Home.” She whispered as it echoed off the walls.

Climbing up the ladder her grandfather had placed there to make it easier for her to get out, she took one more glance at the bottom of the well, before continuing her upward climb.

Walking into her home Kagome called for her family, while taking off her shoes at the door, walking towards the kitchen where she heard her mothers reply.

“Welcome back dear, how was the Feudal Era this time?” She asked.

It was like a routine to her now. Kagome would leave with her friends and fight dangerous demons, then she would return and tell her mother an edited version of the tale. This time however she did not have a energetic smile with bursting energy and happiness. This time that question was answered in hysterical sobbing as Kagome fell to her knees on the kitchen’s tiled floor. Worried sick, Kagome’s mother stopped washing dishes to rush to her daughter’s side.

“Kagome, darling, what is it? Did you have another fight with Inuyasha?” She asked, not really knowing the extent of the pain Kagome was now feeling.

From her spot on the ground Kagome stammered out “N-no, no Mama it it’s not I-I-inu-Yasha.” Shoulders shaking as she hugged her knees to her chest, as her mother wrapped her arms around her comfortingly.

“Then what is it honey? You can tell me,” Mrs. Higurashi said in a motherly tone, worried for her daughter.

“I was at the hot springs bathing, I didn’t see him coming.” She paused trying to regulate her breathing because she had started to hyperventilate. That sentence told her mother she would not like this story one bit, and she tightened her embrace, lending Kagome her strength to continue.

“He attacked me, I tried to fight him but he was to strong. My powers would not react to my call because of the panic I was feeling.” Kagome continued as she looked at the tile on the floor, not wanting to see the worry and concern in her mothers eyes.

“Mama, I was raped.” She said finally, breaking down and clinging to her mother like her very life depended on it.

Hearing the words from her daughter’s mouth her fears were realized. How could this have happened? Where was Inuyasha when it happened? Following the inane self questioning a burning anger filled her heart. Her precious, carefree, loving daughter had been violated in the worst possible manner and she could not have done anything to stop it.

“Mama, I need to visit Dr. Brown and get checked out to make sure nothing was damaged. We can’t say I was raped, because I cannot file a police report and tell them a demon raped me.” She informed her mother, stating why she had come home.

Mrs. Higurashi was pissed, as far as she was concerned Kagome was not to go to the Feudal Era any longer. She decided to keep her angry thoughts to herself for the moment, knowing Kagome needed love not arguing. So she agreed to take her to her doctors for a check up, there were so many things that could be wrong, including the fact that she could be pregnant. She knew that Kagome would never abort the child even if it was the result of her being raped.

‘I just hope she is strong enough to handle it if she is.’ Mrs. Higurashi thought while hugging her daughter.

0ooo0


Sesshomaru was sitting in his study, sorting through scrolls, doing some of his lordly duties. He barely got the chance to do any type of paper work, since he was always busy hunting Naraku. Lately, though, the hanyou seemed to be in hiding to regenerate his body, or build a new one. So instead of walking the country side in search of the weakened hanyou, he was within his study reading scrolls, the work a normal Lady of the West would be doing! It was aggravating to him to know this, but to also know none were worthy of such a gift.

Find a mate was a tedious thing, his beast has the last say in the matter of who will be taken as a mate. But he does not have the only say however, the beast can not mark a female unless both parts agree. Even if one part does not know it yet, or acknowledge it, his beast would know, because it would know his deepest, darkest thoughts and hidden desires.

Today was a strange day, much more so then he had experienced in the past. He had been antsy all day and that was unacceptable, because he was Lord Sesshomaru, and he does not get antsy. He had been feeling it none the less. Ever since he woke up it felt like he was missing something or forgetting something rather important, but he could not remember what it was. No matter how hard he tried he kept drawing a blank. It started when he first woke up, his beast was actually purring in contentment, but as the day wore on it was being to become restless, rattling against its mental bars. Sesshomaru did not know what was going on.

0ooo0


“Higurashi, Kagome.” A middle aged woman holding a folder and wearing scrubs called her name.

Kagome and her mother got up from their seats and walked to the nurse. “Hi I am Kagome.” Kagome informed her, before the nurse smiled and asked her to follow.

They followed the nurse into a room and the door was closed behind them. She took her pen out and began asking questions.

“Do you smoke?”

“No.” Kagome replied

The nurse wrote a no on the line next to the question she asked, then asked another.

“Do you drink alcohol?”

“No.” Kagome said.

The nurse nodded.

“When was your last period?”

Kagome cleared her throat.

“Last month, I am 2 days late. I came here from a pregnancy test and a pap smear.” Kagome said shyly, cheeks tinted red in embarrassment. She really hated this sometimes.

The nurse nodded in acknowledgement to her request, then resumed her questions, asking “Are you allergic to any medicine?”

“No.” she replied to the question.

It went on like that for a few more minutes, then she took her blood pressure, weight, height, and temperature. Once the nurse was finished she exited the room with a “The doctor will be with you shortly.”

Kagome and her mother sat in silence for 10 minutes, before the doctor finally came in to see her.

“Hello again Kagome, what can I do for you?” He asked while shaking her hand and then taking a seat.

Kagome reddened with embarrassment. Why was her doctor a male?

“I need to have a pregnancy test, a blood one preferably and a pap smear. I wanted to make sure everything was okay with me… down there.” She said the last part shyly, now she was wishing that she had a female doctor. It would have been so much easier to talk to her then a male.

The doctor was rather fast, the pap smear lasted no longer then 10 minutes and the blood test took 2 minutes. Right now all she was waiting on was the results of her pregnancy test, they would alert her later if something was wrong on her pap smear tests.

Kagome and her mother waited for 15 minutes before the doctor had come back. He had with him several pamphlets in a folder.

“Kagome your pregnancy test came out positive. I would like to offer you this literature to read. Your pap smear looked normal, there was some vaginal tearing but normal in the case of virginal rough sex,” Kagome blushed vividly. “And will heal by itself. Just take it easy for a while.” The doctor told her as she tried to keep her tears at bay.

‘I am pregnant with a hanyou. Sesshomaru is the father’. She thought depressingly while she hid her face in her hands. After the doctor left the room, she turned to her mother.

“Oh, Mama, what am I going to do?” She cried, the tears she tried so hard to keep at bay came streaming down her face.

Her mother looked at her broken child.

“I don’t know darling. I just don’t know.”