The Lucky Ones
Chapter Fifteen
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The Lucky Ones
By Terri Botta
Disclaimer: I don’t own
Inuyasha. Sole copyright belongs to Viz and Rumiko Takashi. I’m poor so don’t
sue.
Rating: R for later chapters.
Pairing: Inuyasha/Kagome,
Miroku/Sango
Summary: Sometimes Fate hands
you a gift you never thought you’d ever get, and it’s up to you to accept it
for what it is.
Feedback to:
tci100@psu.edu
Website: http://www.wordsmiths.net/Botta
A/N: This chapter has more
adult situations. I am also issuing a snort warning. Do not read this chapter
while consuming beverages. If you snort the stuff all over your keyboard, I
won’t be held responsible. You have been warned. *grin*
*******
Chapter Fifteen
Kagome was
awakened from her peaceful sleep by Yukio getting his own
exactly where she was or why she was half naked under Inuyasha’s
rushing back to her and she flushed with heat.
actually… I’m not a virgin anymore.’
Somehow
that knowledge brought her great pride and she snuggled further against the
warm body that was wrapped around her from behind. The body shifted and moved,
one hand coming to cup her under one breast and pull her closer. The
butterfly kisses all along her neck from her ear to her shoulder. She moaned at
the attention, then gasped when a set of sharp teeth bit her very, very gently
where her neck met her shoulder and a tongue laved the spot. Hot breath tickled
her ear and she shivered, but not with cold.
“Kagome…”
Inuyasha’s husky voice murmured.
“Inuyasha,”
she replied.
The hand on
the side where Yukio was nursing slid down to stroke her thigh, the clawed
fingers sliding under her skirt to touch her bare skin. Ironically, the touch
didn’t have the effect her new lover thought it would have. Instead it served
to remind her that her panties were flung somewhere in the clearing and she had
no idea where. The thought made her giggle and Inuyasha froze.
“Kagome?”
he whispered tentatively.
She craned
her head to look at him, taking in his worried, uncertain eyes, and gave him a
sweet smile.
“I was just
wondering where you threw my underwear.”
“The little
white thing?”
“Yeah.”
He cast
about with his eyes and nose, locating the object. “It’s over there. Do you
want me to get it?”
Kagome
wasn’t imagining things when she thought his voice sounded disappointed, and
she giggled again, shaking her head.
“No,” she
replied, pressing against him in a way she hoped would tell him that all was
well between them. “I just wanted to know where they were.”
The hand
started stroking again and his lips kissed her shoulder.
“Okay.”
She sighed
and let him continue his attentions. As his hand caressed her thigh, lightly
scratching with his claws- not hard enough to leave marks, but enough to make
her skin tingle- he trailed kisses down her shoulder. He turned her body and
his own enough so that he could bring his head around to her front, and began
kissing the swell of her breast. When his lips closed over the hard nipple she
gasped and grew very still.
She was
left with a strange decision. On one hand, she really liked what he was doing
and didn’t particularly want him to stop.
surreal. Yukio was actively nursing, and the thought of Inuyasha suckling at
the other breast was oddly disconcerting on a number of levels. The first, of
course, being that they were engaging in that type of intimacy with the baby
there. The second being that she felt protective towards her infant’s
food. The milk was ultimately Yukio’s and no one else could lay claim to it.
Her dilemma was that she didn’t want to refuse Inuyasha and make him feel rejected,
but at the same time she didn’t want him drinking Yukio’s milk either. That and
the fact that it was one thing to make love when the baby was sleeping in his
sling, but making love while he was awake and right there was something
she was definitely not comfortable with.
In the end
though, she didn’t have to make the choice at all, because Inuyasha already
knew all of that, and he wouldn’t take milk from his son’s mouth either. He
sucked hard enough on the nipple to draw milk once, taking the smallest of
mouthfuls, then relaxed his lips and let his tongue just lick gently. Then he
drew back and rested his cheek against the soft mound of the breast, nuzzling
into her flesh lovingly.
She relaxed
when he released her and mentally berated herself for doubting him for even a
moment. Letting out a sigh, she lifted her free hand and threaded her fingers
into his long hair, rubbing the part of his scalp that she could reach in their
awkward position. He sighed in answer and drew her closer to him with arms that
wrapped around her waist, and not for the first time she marveled at hanyou
flexibility, because she knew that he was twisted around but it didn’t seem to
bother him.
They stayed
that way in tender silence for a brief moment until a noise from Yukio caught
their attention. Kagome had enough time to realize it was his little growl
before he kicked, whacking Inuyasha right on the chin.
“
baby. “What the hell did you do that for, whelp!”
Two big
golden eyes glared back and another warning growl rumbled out of the tiny
chest. Kagome began to laugh.
“He’s mad!
He’s really, really mad!” she exclaimed, still giggling.
“
chin. “Brat can kick.”
“He thought
you were taking his milk,” she snickered, then bounced Yukio lightly. “Oh
you’re getting feisty. First you bite that smelly woman and now you kick your
father. You’d better be careful, Otou won’t tolerate
that.”
“Damn
straight, whelp,” Inuyasha growled warningly. “You can’t boss me around.”
Yukio
growled back, but Inuyasha silenced him with a hand on the back of his neck.
The adult hanyou didn’t even have to squeeze before the pup submitted, going
limp with a whine.
“Inuyasha,
that’s enough,” Kagome said seriously when he didn’t take his hand off Yukio’s
neck right away.
Inuyasha
obeyed, releasing the contrite pup who promptly began to sniffle and cry.
Kagome shushed him and pacified him with the other breast. His whimpers died as
soon as he had what he wanted.
“Don’t be
rough with him,” she scolded.
“You can’t
let him dominate you,” Inuyasha told her firmly.
“He’s just
a baby. He doesn’t understand.”
“He’s a
hanyou pup, Kagome. If he knows enough to growl and defend his milk, he’s old
enough to learn his place. Don’t question me on this.”
She gave
him a disapproving look that softened when she saw him rub his chin again.
“You’re
just angry because he kicked you,” she teased lightly.
“Well,
there’s nothing wrong with his legs for certain.”
She turned
around to face him and they sat across from each other, both still in various
stages of undress. Inuyasha was as bare-chested as she, but he’d put his
face flushed and he looked away shyly.
His
embarrassment was endearing and she smiled. Leaning over, she kissed the sore
spot on his chin tenderly.
“Better
now?” she asked softly.
He touched
the place where her lips had just been and looked at her longingly. She responded
by kissing him gently, and his hands came up to cup her face as he kissed her
back, his tongue sliding across her lips.
“Kagome...”
“Inuyasha,”
she replied, stroking his arm with her free hand, reassuring him and
reconnecting with him. He had to be feeling a little vulnerable and uncertain
after what had passed between them, and she wanted to be sure that he knew
everything was okay. “Thank you for last night.”
He pulled
back, gasping in shock and stared at her wide-eyed, his upper teeth biting his
lower lip. Then he whipped away and squatted a few inches away from her, his
fists planted on the ground as he fought to hold in his emotions.
“Inuyasha?”
she questioned, unhappy that what she thought would be reassurance had the
exact opposite affect.
“You’re
thanking me?” he whispered faintly in disbelief, his head bowed.
“Yes.
Shouldn’t I? You shared something precious with me last night, and I’m very
grateful,” she explained gently, not understanding why he was upset.
“
grateful?” he gasped, giving her another wide-eyed glance before he looked
away. “It was your first time too Kagome and you gave it to me.
the one who should be grateful. I’m the one who was given something precious.
You could have had anyone: Hojou, Akitoki,
even that stinking wolf, but it was me you chose. I’m the one who should be
licking your feet.”
“Inuyasha...”
“Thank you,
Kagome.”
“Inuyasha.”
He looked
at her, his eyes uncertain.
“You’re too
far away.”
He gave her
a shy, relieved smile and moved close again, taking her into his arms from the
side and nuzzling his nose into the crook of her neck.
“
Kagome
giggled. “He won’t. He’s almost finished anyway.”
“You can
tell?”
“Yeah.”
“So he’ll
be done soon?”
She nodded,
rubbing her chin against the top of his head. “Mm hmm.”
“Then he’ll
sleep, right? It’s still dark,” he asked, his voice slightly hopeful.
“He
should.”
“Okay.”
They stayed
quiet until Yukas fas finished eating, then Kagome burped him and changed his
diaper. A few minutes later, he was in his sling and settling down. Inuyasha
took him and hung the strap from the bough he’d been on before. She waited for
him to come back to her, her hands folded neatly in her lap, as proper as
someone could be when she was topless and not wearing any underwear.
“Kagome,”
he breathed, returning to her side and sitting next to her.
“Inuyasha,”
she answered calmly, watching his face as he tried to read her, his eyes
searching .
She could
tell he wanted to make love again, but he was being so shy about it- like he
was afraid to ask. His uncertainty was adorable and warmed her heart. She held
in her chuckle because she didn’t want him to think she was laughing at him,
and waited for him to make the first move.
It came in
the form of a soft kiss which she returned eagerly. Then he let out a long sigh
and wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close.
“Kagome...
Is it alright, Kagome?”
“Yes,” she answered
and kissed him with a little more force than he’d kissed her, telling him in
words and deeds that she wanted him.
“If we do
this again, we won’t get back to the village before dawn,” he said when their
lips parted.
“That’s
okay. I’d rather stay here and be alone with you anyway. I like having you to
myself.”
He gave a
short laugh and hugged her tight.
“I don’t
like sharing you with anyone else either.”
“I know.”
With a
gentle push he laid her down, spreading his haori
underneath her as a barrier against the cold ground. She went willingly,
letting him lead, knowing he wouldn’t do anything to hurt her. He seemed
determined to take his time, removing her skirt and kissing her skin sweetly,
mapping her body with his lips and hands. In moments he had her moaning with
pleasure and threading her fingers into his hair to rub his ears, then he moved
his head between her legs and she once again thanked anyone who was listening
for his very talented tongue.
In the
aftermath of her climax, he urged her onto her stomach and she realized that he
wanted to take her from behind, obviously in the inu-youkai
way. She obliged him, and rose to her hands and knees, bracing herself for his
next move. It came swiftly and a little more roughly than she would have liked,t sht she bore it without complaint.
He draped
himself across her back, lightly nipping at the base of her neck as his hands
reached under her to knead her breasts until they slid down to grasp her hips
and pull her onto him in time with his rhythm. She gasped, the position being
deeper than the one they had used before and her newly opened body protested
the invasion, but she didn’t want to tell him to stop. Instead she bit her lip
and tried to concentrate on the memory of his face during their first time, and
the feelings it brought to her, to help her ignore the soreness and discomfort:
Inuyasha’s eyes misty with tears and love. Inuyasha’s mouth opened in a silent
cry. Inuyasha gasping her name as he climaxed…
you. You’re beautiful, my hanyou. I adore you.’
He stopped
and she came back to herself, wondering if he’d finished. Slowly, he pulled out
of her and she turned her head to look over her shoulder. He was kneeling on
his haunches behind her and his head was down, his ears drooped. He was
stroking himself with one hand as well but it looked like he was going soft.
“Inuyasha?”
she questioned. ‘What’s wrong?’ she
wanted to ask. Was she failing to please him?
“I don’t
like it that way,” he answered breathlessly and he sounded like he was in pain.
“I can’t see your face. And... and you’re not responding the way you did
before. Kagome, was I hurting you?”
She turned
around and sat down on his haori, facing him. She
wasn’t sure how to answer. She didn’t want to hurt him, but she didn’t want to
lie either, then she realized that he’d know if she was lying and that he’d
already figured out that something wasn’t right. The very fact that he’d
stopped was a testament to his control and his sensitivity to her reactions.
“A little,”
she admitted as gently as she could. “It was a little deep and I’m still a
little sore.”
“Forgive
me,” he whispered brokenly.
She moved
close and touched his arm reassuringly. “It’s okay, really. We’re both really
new at this.”
He shook
his head. “I don’t ever want to hurt you. Not ever. I’m sorry.”
He sounded
devastated and her heart broke. Leaning over, she kissed his face and stroked
his chest lovingly.
“
you.”
“Kagome...”
“I forgive
you, Inuyasha,” she told him, then smiled a wicked smile. She thought she knew
a way to make sure he knew she didn’t blame him, or hold anything against him.
Braver than
she ever thought she could be, Kagome crouched over his lap and took him into
her mouth.
Her friend
Yuka, who had a boyfriend, once compared going down on a boy to eating a
popsicle. At the time, she’d accepted the analogy because she had no personal
experience to go on. Now she realized that Yuka was dead wrong. It wasn’t
anything at all like eating a popsicle. For one thing, popsicles were very
cold, not almost hot enough to burn your mouth. And they got smaller when you
licked and sucked them, not bigger. And they tasted sweet and fruity, not salty
and bitter. Then again, they also didn’t scream your name and grab your hair,
and altogether make you feel powerful and wanted and loved and beautiful.
Popsicles just didn’t have that strong an effect on her.
Inuyasha
howling, writhing and ripping up the earth next to him with his claws so he
wouldn’t pull her hair out by its roots, now that had an affect on
her.
to his back, gasping, moaning, and crying as she worked him, but she knew she
wasn’t doing it right. Ayumi had once found a stash
of her parents’ adult films and they’d popped one in during a late night
sleepover- thus spurring Yuka to give them the whole ‘popsicle’ talk. The woman
on the screen had been able to take her man all the way in, and she could
barely fit half of Inuyasha before she started gagging. Then again, she doubted
Inuyasha cared.
He clutched
her head again, but this time to stop her not encourage.
“Kagome!
Kagome, stop! Stop! I’m going to...!”
She
stopped, really not sure if she was ready to ‘swallow’ him if he did climax in her
mouth. Her actions, however, had made her want him and she had no intention of
leaving him hanging. Crawling up his body, she straddled his hips and lowered
herself down onto him. He grabbed her thighs, trying to dislodge her.
an>“an>“Kagome,
no! You’re sore!”
about that, I’m doing something wrong.’
“It’s okay.
This way, I can control how deep you go and it won’t hurt me.”
He stared
up at her, shell-shocked and wide-eyed. His pupils were almost completely
dilated, and he was breathing in huge, heaving gasps. She smiled at him, and
began to move.
The
position did leave her in complete control, but also left her in charge of her
own pleasure. She tried to find a pace that pleased them both, but it was
harder than she’d thought it would be. Finally, she found a rhythm that worked,
and with Inuyasha’s help as he raised his hips to meet her, she was able to
build the passion between them.
Looking
down at him, she took in the sight of him beneath her. His hair was spread out
around his head in a fan of silken silver and his bangs were plastered to his
forehead in sweaty ringlets. His skin was flushed and damp, and the expression
on his face was one of abject adoration blisbliss. He looked positively
ravished and beautiful- the most beautiful thing she had ever seen in her
entire lifetime. She took his hands, squeezing them tight, and smiled at him.
“You are
magnificent,” she whispered.
He gave a
strangled cry in answer as he threw his head back and yanked his hands from her
grasp, reaching for her, begging.
“Kagome!
Kagome, please... please let me...”
His hands
were sliding up her sides, pushing her backwards, and she realized what he was
trying to do. Perfectly content to switch and let him do some of the work, she
shifted and let him lower her to her back. He became dislodged during the move,
but he remedied that as soon as he was between her legs again.
With him in
control and both of them too far gone to wait, he drove her to a swift and
powerful climax, wasting no time and climaxing right after her. They both cried
each other’s names as they shuddered with release, and Inuyasha collapsed on
top of her immediately thereafter. They stayed there, a trembling, sweaty mass,
until their breathing calmed and their hearts stopped pounding.
“Okay. I
like this position best,” she finally gasped, still tingling from her orgasm.
His answer
was a low chuckle that graduated into a barking laugh, which felt very strange
considering that he was still inside her.
“Do you?”
he replied, lifting up on his arms so he could look at her. “I like this one
too.”
Slowly he
disengaged and came to rest beside her, one hand reaching to hold hers tightly.
“Thank
you,” he whispered.
She
chuckled. “You’re welcome.”
“That was
the best so far, ne?”
“Yeah,” she
agreed.
“Good. Now
I know where to start to make it even better,” he said, giving her a cocky
smirk. He looked so happy and pleased with himself.
She smiled
back warmly. “Oh no, I think I’m in trouble.”
“You’ve
been with me almost two years and you’re just figuring that out?”
“No, but
you should know by now that I like trouble.”
“
She slapped
him lightly on the chest. “Hey, I’m not ‘stuck with you.’ Don’t ever say that,
especially not when we’re together like this, okay? I’m with you because I like
being with you and I want to be by your side.”
He gave her
an awe-filled look. “I know. And that’s the most amazing thing of all.”
They stared
at each other and Kagome was certain he was going to tell her he loved her. She
was waiting for it, because then she could tell him she loved him too, but the
moment was broken by Yukio fussing in his sling. Kagome winced and Inuyasha
groaned.
“What timing,
pup.”
“Do you
think we disturbed him?” she asked.
“He’s
probably been awake for a while, but figured since we were finished we could
pay attention to him now.”
“He is
pushy.”
“He lives
up to his name,” he reminded, then added, “Should we go get him?”
Kagome
sighed. “Yeah. We probably should get more sleep, and I... I think I need to
rest some before we do
He looked
at her in concern. “I didn’t hurt you, did I?”
She shook
her head. “No, I’m just still a bit sore from before. It’s normal, I’m sure.
I’ve never been with a boy before and well...” She gave him a sly smile.
“You’re well endowed.”
He blinked
at her then blushed. “I am?” Then he got a little irritated. “Wait, how would
you know?”
Now it was
her turn to blush. “Well, I’ve seen guys naked before...”
“You have?
Who? When?” he demanded.
She laughed
at his jealously. “Well, you for one. And Miroku.”
“Miroku!
What were you doing looking at that letch?!”
She rolled
her eyes. “He was just getting out of the hot spring. I surprised him. It was
an accident. And... I’ve seen pictures of guys...”
“Pictures?
Where?”
“Back
home... in books...”
“Books?
What kind of books have you been reading, woman?!”
She
giggled. He was getting all flustered and jealous, and with him naked and still
sweaty, it was amusing. She half expected him to start marking his territory to
warn off other males.
gonna ‘sit’ him…’
“It’s
nothing. Never mind. You’re nicely proportioned. Leave it at that. Besides,
there’s no reason for you to be jealous. As you said yourself, you were my
first so thatls yls you how I feel about any other guys.”
He snorted.
“I just don’t like the idea of you looking at other men.”
“Why? None
of them can compare to your greatness.”
His eyes
narrowed. “Hey, you’re humoring me.”
She
snickered. “Just a little. But it’s true. No one can compare to you, and no one
ever will. So relax, my jealous hanyou. I only have eyes for you.”
It looked
like he would argue, but Yukio upped his fussing to a full cry.
“We’d
better get him before he starts wailing loud enough to wake the village. They’d
come up here, torches burning, and we’d have to explain why we’re naked under
this tree,” she said.
He laughed
and stood, walking over to retrieve their son. Kagome watched him, enjoying the
view as he moved. She figured after what they had done together, she was
allowed to look now. He was fluid grace and balance packaged into a lean,
muscularm thm that had not a spare ounce of flesh on it. His muscles rippled under
his smooth skin, showing off his washboard stomach and powerful legs. Oh, and
he had a nice butt too.
It thrilled
her to know that no one else had ever seen him this way, or shared what they
had shared. It certainly put her one up on Kikyou who’d never even kissed him
when she was alive.
allowing herself a moment of bitterness.
She let
herself feel it sometimes because then it wouldn’t ever control her. By acknowledging
her jealousy and resentment, and knowing her feelings were normal under the
circumstances, she was able to diffuse them and honor them for what they were:
proof that she loved Inuyasha. In this way, no one would ever be able to turn
her against him or use her negative feelings to force her to hurt him.
He noticed
her appreciative stare as he returned to her side carrying Yukio in his sling
and blushed a little. Then the blush faded and he lifted his head, his lips
turning up into a sultry smile and he put a little swagger into his step.
allowed to gloat some now too.’
“See
something you like?” he asked huskily.
She smiled
back, playing his game. “Mmm hmmm, better than any
picture I’ve ever seen.”
He sat down
next to her and she looked at him through her lashes. “Only this one I get to
touch.”
She trailed
a finger down his chest to his stomach, making him shiver.
“Kagome…”
he sighed, closing his eyes in pleasure.
She giggled
and took the baby from him, settling Yukio in her lap.
“And you,
fussy boy. What do you want, hmmm?” she asked the infant.
He wasn’t
hungry and he didn’t need to be changed, but he was wide awake and looking at
her with his big eyes.
“Do you
want attention?” she asked sweetly, rubbing his belly and cooing.
He smiled
and burbled happily, sticking his fist into his mouth.
“Fine, rub
his belly will you,” Inuyasha sniffed in feigned annoyance.
“I’ve
already rubbed a lot more than your belly tonight.”
“
She
snickered, then a feeling of wetness between her legs made her pause.
“Here, I
need to clean up,” she said, giving Yukio back to him for a few moments.
He obliged
her, entertaining the baby with his hair and fingers while she used some of
Yukio’s cleaning cloths to wipe herself off. Knowing what she was cleaning from
her skin made her think of something rather important that they hadn’t paid any
mind to until now, and she hoped she wasn’t going to regret getting caught up
in the heat of passion.
“Inuyasha?”
she asked tentatively, finding her underwear and putting it back on.
“Hmm?”
“We didn’t
use any birth control.”
“Birth
control?”
“
explained, slipping on her skirt.
He blinked
at her then shrugged. “It’s okay. I know your heat scent and you’re not in it.”
She
blushed. “You… you do?”
He gave her
a tolerant look and tapped his nose. “It’s not like you can hide it from me.
It’s kind of obvious.”
“Oh. Well, you’ve
n sai saiythiything…” she said, returning to his side and settling next to him.
She cast about for her bra and shirt, putting them on.
“I like
living. It’s bad enough when you go into heat because you get all cranky a few
days later. I keep my head down because I know if I don’t you’ll slam it into
the ground- repeatedly.”
She
chuckled nervously. “Am I really that bad?” ‘I
never realized he could smell when I’m fertile.igurigured he could smell when I
started bleeding, but I didn’t know he could smell the other…’
“You can
be. If you don’t get enough to eat and sleep, then you’re worse.”
“I didn’t
realize that you were so aware of my body changes.”
He
shrugged. “I’m aware of any change in your scent, Kagome. As I tried to tell
you, scent tells us inu-youkai a lot. We depend on
it. I’m always aware of the scents around us. I can’t help but notice when you
smell different.”
“Well, in
this case, I think that will help us a lot because you’ll be able to smell when
I’m fertile and we can use precautions.”
“Yeah, you
wouldn’t want another pup while you’re still nursing this greedy whelp,” he
agreed, rubbing o’s o’s ears.
Yukio
giggled and waved his hands at his father, then he rolled to look at Kagome.
She picked him up and held him in her lap while Inuyasha got dressed in his
“Now why
wouldn’t I want another cute little baby like you, hmmm?” she said to him,
tickling him under his c “Co “Could it be that you’re already turning out to be
as jealous as your father? All these cute men just vying for my attention.
Whatever am I going to do?”
Inuyasha
snorted, draping his haori over her shoulders, then
he settled behind her and pulled her and Yukio with him as he braced his back
against a tree.
“He starts
interrupting us when we’re in the middle of something good and I’m
Kagome
looked down at the baby in her lap, then gave Inuyasha a fond look.
“If he
starts doing that then yes, he’ll need to learn not to.”
“
Kagome
thought back to the time when Souta was two,
remembering how Mama couldn’t even go to the bathroom without him. He’d bang on
the closed door and scream until she came out. She wondered if Yukio would be
the same way.
“We’ll
manage,” she said with a shrug and a yawn. She was getting tired now that
everything had calmed down.
Yukio
grabbed her finger and started gnawing on it.
“
complained, pulling her finger away.
Inuyasha
replaced her finger with his own and felt along the inside of the baby’s mouth.
“He’s
teething. The upper fangs are starting to come in.”
“Oh great.”
“We should
get him something to chew on.”
“I already
bought a teething ring for him. Do you want me to get it?”
“He can use
my finger for now. He’s not hurting me.”
“You’re
sure?”
He nodded.
“Yeah. He’s getting sleepy again anyway. His eyes are getting tired. He’ll go
back to sleep soon.”
“Hmm, maybe
he just wanted to be cuddled.”
“There is
that.”
Kagome snuggled
into Inuyasha’s strong chest. “I can understand why. I like to be cuddled too.”
He nuzzled
her hair and gave her a soft kiss on her temple in answer, then pulled her
closer. Kagome slipped the strap of the baby sling over her head and settled
Yukio against her body, sequestering him safely between the two of them. The
infant gave a tired gurgle and settled down with a tiny sigh. Kagome shared his
sentiment and gave a sigh of her own, pulling Inuyasha’s haori
around her shoulders for warmth.
Inuyasha’s
arms came further around her, tucking her into his embrace, and he rested his
chin on her head as she snuggled into his shoulder. She fell asleep to the
sound of his heartbeat in her ears.
When she
woke again it was daylight. Inuyasha was already up and looking at her with
tenderness and peaceful contentment.
“Good
morning,” he greeted.
She kissed
him, loving the look on his face. “
him.
He gave a
throaty growl, his eyes turning heated and his hands gripping her a little bit
tighter.
“Be
careful, woman, we have to get to the village sometime.”
“You mean
we can’t stay here all day and just cuddle and make love and live on air?”
She saw his
face grow thoughtful as if he was actually considering it, then he shook his
head and frowned sadly.
“No. We
need to find out about any shard rumors, and the others know that we’re coming
back very soon. Someone would interrupt us,” he answered with no small amount
of disappointment.
She giggled
and pulled slowly out of his embrace, stretching. Yukio fussed in his sling,
and she knew it was just about time to feed and change him. Taking him out of
his carrier, she switched his diaper and gave him breakfast. She could already
feel the more prominent bumps from the fangs just beginning to cut through his
gums, and knew that even if he didn’t bite her, nursing him once he had teeth
was going to be a challenge.
Inuyasha
stayed next to her, nuzzling her and smiling at her and all around being
uncharacteristically affonatonate. Joy was just radiating off of him in waves
and she couldn’t help but be happy herself, smiling at him and returning his
affections until Yukio was finished and they were ready to go. Inuyasha picked
up their supplies and her bag, and they left the well clearing.
They
emerged from the forest and into the sunlight. It was a bright, beautiful day
and the village looked so quaint and peacefith ith its rice paddies and wooden
huts. Kagome stopped to admire it and feel at home.
“We need
our own hut,” Inuyasha said suddenly.
“Hmm?” she
questioned, looking askance at him.
“What? You
want to keep staying with Kaede after… last night?”
“Oh,” she
replied, understanding.
He got a
strange, excited look on his face and he hit his palm with one fist in
decision. “I will build you a hut, Kagome. No! A house! I will build you a
good house, Kagome, a strong house. With separate rooms for sleeping!”
“A house?”
she repeated. He said it with such conviction and enthusiasm that she was taken
aback.
“And it
will have a place for you to take your baths and glass windows!” he went
on happily.
There was
something in his face, in his voice, in the way he was saying these things,
that set off little warning bells in her mind. There was something important
going on here, something that was being implied and not actually said.
Something having to do with the building of a house.
It hit her
suddenly and she gasped. She remembered Miroku’s
proposal to Sango, how he had asked her to live with him and bear his child.
Then after Naraku had been defeated, he would not wed
her until he had made a place for them to live and raise their children. It had
been a very important thing and everyone had helped build the couple’s new
home, but ultimately the greater part of the work and planning had been up to
the houshi at his own insistence.
Now
Inuyasha was promising her a house of her own that he would build with his own
hands, and his vow was not unlike Miroku’s to Sango.
For a
moment her heart could not contain her joy, but then she came crashing back
down to earth. He wasn’t really asking her to marry him. No, hs ass assuming
that she would stay with him and live in the house he would build.
‘
mind whispered.
Yes, but
how dare he assume that without even asking her? She was just about to tell him
not to go all medieval on her when she realized that he essentially
medieval. The Sengoku Jidai wasn’t all that different
from Medieval Europe, and in these times a man had to prove that he could
provide his bride with food and shelter. Inuyasha was only responding in the
way that was accepted by his era. There was no such thing as women’s rights and
equal opportunity. With the sole exceptions of mikos
and taijiyas like Sango, women were expected to
marry, bear lots of sons and obey their husbands.
She
clenched her fists, unexpectedly angry. ‘He
just wants me to drop everything, spread my legs and be his little woman… of
all the arrogant, selfish… that CHAUVANISTIC PIG!’
little voice reminded. ‘And you know he’d
never ask you to leave your life or treat you as a sex object or something to
vent his need on. Look how he treated you last night when he found out he was
hurting you. Those were not the actions of someone who is arrogant and selfish.
Even now, he is promising to build you a house much finer than anything else in
the village because he knows how much more luxury you are used to. He wants you
to be happy here. He wants you to stay by his side and be his.’
Reality
settled in on her as she rememd and another person he had wanted to stay by his
side, and she almost started to cry. ‘I
may be his, but he’s not mine and I can’t let him do something like that for
me.’
“Inuyasha,
wait,” she said, interrupting his descriptive plans. “You don’t have to do
that.”
He stopped
and blinked at her. “Of course I do. Where will we live if I don’t?”
She sighed.
“Inuyasha. Don’t build me a house,” she said firmly.
He stared
at her, his eyes opening wide, and for a moment he looked absolutely crushed.
him.’
scrambled to reassure him, reaching for his hands, while she tried to find the
words to tell him what she was feeling.
“Inuyasha…
I don’t need a house. In… in my time, men and women… they stay together and
sometimes the man never builds the woman a house. But that’s okay because she
doesn’t need a house and she stays with him anyway.”
She could
see him puzzling out her meaning, trying to understand what she was telling
him, then his face grew impossibly sad.
“What… what
have I done? How have I behaved that you would think I would use a woman in
such a way? That I would use you… like that,” he answered sof pul pulling his
hands away from hers.
“You
wouldn’t… and you won’t. I know that, but…” She trailed off, tears welling in
her eyes.
the only way he’ll understand.’
“But I love
you,” she admitted, then met his stunned face. “I love you, Inuyasha, and I
want to be with you. I want nothing more than to be by your side forever. We’ve
talked about this before, about my decision to stay with you in spite of…
everything. And I know that while I amd had have always been, yours; you aren’t
mine and you can’t make the kind of promises to me that you’re making. But
that’s okay. I’m okay with that.”
He stared
at her for a long moment, then his face fell and he looked away, his ears
drooping.
“Kikyou,”
he breathed, his voice full ogretgret.
She
stopped, unable to go on, and hoping she really didn’t have to. She’d said most
of what she’d needed to say, and she prayed he would understand.
He was
quiet for a long time, his eyes looking down at the village, and she
concentrated on her son, holding him and rocking him against her shoulder. He
was a little fussy because she was upset, and she neededcomfcomfort him almost
as much as he needed comforting.
“You’re not
her replacement,” Inuyasha finally said, his voice sad and defeated. “You never
were. You couldn’t be when you are so much more to me than she ever was. And
you shouldn’t have to take whatever I’m free to give you. You deserve so much
better than me.”
“There is
no one better, at least not for me Inuyasha.”
He gave a
short nod as if he had expected her to say that, and his face grew even sadder
and more serious.
“Let’s go,
Kagome,” he said, and began walking towards the village.
She looked
at his back f mom moment as he led the way, her heart aching and bleeding
silently. Then she hurried to join him, at his side where she had been for the
better part of two years. He didn’t look at her, but he did hold her hand when
she reached for his. It was a small consolation.