Interest

A/N Sorry this took a bit guys! I had relatives visiting and totally lost track of time! Thanks again for the lovely reviews, and I'll put up a couple extra chapters lickety split to try and make up for it! Oh, and the chapters might be a little longer, now. Like I said, they were originally done with at time limit, but when I started getting closer to the end of the story, I hit the 'need to get all this in' issues, so the chapters grew a bit.

Summary: Telling Inuyasha, and a little change in plans
Theme: Denial

All the following warnings MAY apply to all chapters, but WILL apply at sometime in the story: MPREG, anal, oral, humor, N/C, H/C, hand job, blow job, WAFF, M/M, Rim, Spanking (mild)

Chapter 14 - Denial

Miroku kept himself from fidgeting as Inuyasha digested all he had to say without expression.

“…so, that might…take care of it.”

Had he ever thought that Sango’s slaps were painful? Or that getting knocked senseless by her hiraikotsu was agony? He had been foolishly naïve. The sensation was nothing compared to telling Inuyasha that his body was looking at Miroku like a prospective bitch for future children.

Miroku felt his skin prickling painfully in new humiliation just contemplating it. Mortal embarrassment – a new pain that he would prefer to never experience to this extent ever again. Glancing up in trepidation at Inuyasha’s face, he bit his lip. It was blank, eyes flat and mouth tight while Inuyasha sat cross-legged on the ground.

It wasn’t surprised, though. Had he heard Kouga and Sango already? Miroku would have sworn he was too far away. Although, before they’d arrived…hadn’t Inuyasha indicated that he might know something about what was going on?

“Did you know about this?”

That got a reaction. Inuyasha looked away, staring at the mouth of the cave before he spoke quietly. “Not really. Didn’t know about this rut shit or anything.” He turned his attention back to Miroku. “But I remember smellin’ some pregnant bitch in the village before I…you know… and I kept looking for the same smell every time after we – uh-“

Inuyasha stopped talking, staring at Kouga and Sango seated not far away. The ookami eavesdropped shamelessly, grinning toothily at them, and Inuyasha growled back.

“Never mind. It doesn’t matter,” Miroku said quickly. It didn’t. The horse was out of the barn and there was no putting it back now. “We merely have to spend a few days at this pool and that might satiate your youkai into subsiding. It’s a small price to pay to regain control over your body, I think. A mere handful of days is likely all that will be required.”

“A few days where you have to live with me doing things to you every night,” Inuyasha murmured miserably.

Miroku flushed. He’d hoped he could avoiding discussing it quite so bluntly until a bit closer to the actual act. It was hard enough merely thinking about the sex. Talking about it, planning for it, was more than he wanted to deal with right now. Not that he had a choice. If this wasn’t addressed soon, he was in for another night of Inuyasha coming after him again anyway. They needed to get this done.

And…if his backside didn’t hurt quite so badly, he wouldn’t be nearly so worried about it. Used to it, he reminded himself. Used to the act, to the sight of Inuyasha staring at his body as though it were something to consume, to the feel of something slick and hot pounding inside of him. It happened so often now, he knew what to expect – a climax – as well as the fact that he wouldn’t hurt until it was all over.

He came when he was taken, after all.

Oh dear Buddha did he come.

But Inuyasha looked so beaten down by the idea, and talking about this was a completely different story than surviving it. Miroku watched Inuyasha carefully, worried. His friend’s ears were flat, his posture slumped and defeated. Miroku wished he knew whether Inuyasha hated the act itself, or the fact that he forced Miroku to participate in it.

Did he find it disgusting?

Miroku had never considered that aspect of their activities, but it could very well be. Inuyasha wasn’t Buddhist; he wouldn’t necessarily view male relations with other males in the same way. He might dislike the actual sex as much as the events leading up to-

“How about you just go away, monk? That’d take care of it too, you know,” Inuyasha said morosely, and Miroku felt his belly grow icy.

“Go away?”

“Yeah, you know, leave. You ain’t abandoning me any more. We know what’s wrong and it’s nothing that’ll get worse, except for you. Why don’t you just leave? You’ll be happier by yourself anyhow, and you won’t have to sacrifice yourself this way.”

Before Miroku could answer, Kouga snorted and yelled out. “Wouldn’t work, dumbass.”

Inuyasha stood and glared, confronting him as he deliberately stood between Kouga and Miroku. “What the hell do you know?”

“I know ‘cause I’ve seen this shit before. He tries to leave, you’re just going to lose it and track his ass down. And probably punish him for running off, besides. Not that the lech doesn’t deserve it after all the crap he’s done.” Kouga leaned back against the log Sango was using for a bench, smirking.

“Shut the fuck up, Kouga,” Inuyasha growled, ignoring Miroku as the monk stood up as well. “You don’t say another damn word about Miroku, got that?”

Shrugging, Kouga smiled at them both. “There is one thing you might want to hear before you tell me to keep it closed, mutt. Sango was thinking about it, and she figures we got one thing wrong about how to fix this.”

Trying to step to the side of Inuyasha and finally giving up as the stubborn hanyou shifted in front of him every time, Miroku peered around him.

“And what, exactly, were we mistaken about?” He used what he thought was a remarkably calm voice for the amount of irritation he had to deal with at the moment. Miroku got ready for bad news as he looked at Kouga’s face. The ookami was wearing that smug expression that was becoming far too familiar.

“You can’t just go to the Fertility pool and wait for Inuyasha to go youkai loony and fuck you.” He seemed to relish saying ‘fuck’ more than he should and Miroku glared at him. “You do that, where the scent is the same before and after he does you, Sango thinks he’s gonna know it’s not from you. He’ll never think you’re carrying a brat in the belly that way.”

Miroku wanted to groan. That actually made sense. “Then there’s no way-“

“Oh yeah there is.” Kouga chuckled while he dragged it out until both Inuyasha and Miroku were ready to strangle him. “You gotta screw each other BEFORE Inuyasha loses it.”

Inuyasha’s body tensed, quivering as though he were about to pounce. “What the fuck are you talking about?” he spat out.

He hates it, Miroku thought, taken aback by the viciousness in Inuyasha’s voice. He hates having sex with me. The thought was actually unpleasant. Inuyasha…disliked doing these things with Miroku? And Miroku was growing so used to them that they seemed almost normal. It hurt when his friend went crazy on him and wouldn’t stop, but the sex itself was actually rather amazing.

Not that he wanted to have sex with Inuyasha on a nightly basis. Naturally not. He was looking forward to having this constant stalking end. He’d thought, though, that once this was all over, Inuyasha and he might explore what had happened between them. Only every once in a great while, of course. He’d simply thought…

Kouga finally answered Inuyasha with an amused snort. “Your youkai senses’ll be a little wacked when you’re still in control of yourself. So Sango thinks you should fuck Miroku and leave your seed in him first. Then when you go youkai and smell yourself AND the scent of breeding bitches – it might actually work. Your youkai’ll think YOU were the one to make that scent. That’s what Sango is pretty sure will happen, anyway.”

Inuyasha didn’t move and Miroku couldn’t bring himself to touch him. He didn’t know what Inuyasha would do.

“That was very crude, Kouga,” Sango said quietly, standing up behind him.

“Was it wrong?” Miroku asked.

She blushed but shook her head. “I think you’re going to have to… do… things” She waved her hands vaguely as though she didn’t have a clue what those things involved. You’d think she’d never been married. “But you have to do it before Inuyasha loses himself or I don’t think it’ll work.”

Inuyasha turned and looked at him, eyes dark and pained, and Miroku had a moment’s enlightenment. He knew that look; Inuyasha wasn’t thinking about the sex itself. He was condemning himself for their situation; Miroku was certain of it.

“Inuyasha,” he whispered, trying to keep his voice low at a futile attempt at privacy. “Don’t worry. It’s not such a bad thing.”

Inuyasha’s eyes narrowed as he stared at him. “Don’t lie. I saw how much you hate what’s been happening the past couple days. I’m not gonna force you to do it again.”

Miroku’s hands clenched. He knew he shouldn’t have mouthed off when he was irritated. “I was angry we hadn’t come here earlier. That is not the same as loathing what has happened. Truly, I would rather my body had a few days,“

-or weeks-

“…to rest before attempting this, but it is not entirely unpleasant.” Far from unpleasant, during the actual act, Miroku thought.

“You said that before, Houshi, and you’re as full of shit now as you were then. How can having a fucking crazy youkai taking your ass not be ‘unpleasant?’ You could barely move, dammit!”

Miroku knew he was blushing slightly and he willed it away. From the way his cheeks tingled, he didn’t think he was very successful. “Aah. That is- Well-“

Inuyasha nodded decisively as his lips twisted. His eyes looked away from Miroku as though it was too painful to look at him. “See. I knew you were making that shit up to try and make me feel better. It’s a fucking nightmare for you and-“

“That is not true!” Miroku swallowed painfully, feeling he was now reaching even greater heights of personal humiliation. He should not have to say this, but Inuyasha was such a stubborn, uncompromising, guilt-swamped…ass. “Rough sex is different than ‘bad’ sex, Inuyasha.”

With golden eyes suddenly focused back on him, Miroku made a great effort not to drop his own gaze. Inuyasha had to believe him on this.

“And what, you’re sayin’ that when I…take you, it’s the rough sex? Not the bad sex?” Inuyasha asked hoarsely. A small nod was all Miroku could manage.

“So what’s that mean?” Inuyasha asked, his eyes wavering on the edge of the self-loathing he’d been mired in for days now. “What the fuck is the difference?”

“Ehhh. R-rough sex can be…good,” Miroku stuttered slightly. Inuyasha still didn’t look convinced and Miroku lowered his voice to an almost inaudible whisper. “It- Dammit, I already told you this after the first time it happened! I shouldn’t have to say it again.”

“Say it anyway, houshi,” Inuyasha demanded. “It’s been goin’ on too long now for you to lie like when you thought it was just once.” He was almost glaring, although Miroku couldn’t figure out why.

“I’m telling you, I didn’t lie!” Miroku hissed.

“Then what are you trying to say?”

“That I climax!” Miroku’s voice was shaking. He was humiliated, sore, frustrated, and now he had to say this again, but in a place where youkai like that bastard Kouga might actually be able to hear him! “I climax every time you come inside my body, you stubborn ass! Yes, it is frightening and rough, but it is also pleasurable enough to give both of us release, and so will you cease castigating yourself over this!”

Inuyasha was silent, his eyes watching as though he could somehow determine Miroku’s sincerity.

“Stop looking at me like that,” Miroku muttered angrily. “I am not lying about this.”

“You really mean it?” Inuyasha finally asked.

“I just said-“

“So what feels good, then?”

“What?”

“You said it feels good. What about it feels good? Show me you ain’t lyin’. If you can actually tell me two things about my youkai taking you that’s good, I’ll believe you.”

Miroku looked around frantically, noting Kouga and Sango pretending not to eavesdrop. From Kouga’s sudden wink, he knew the bastard could hear everything they were saying. He could NOT talk about this now, not with him there and…not now.

“Inuyasha, you are being quite unreasonable.”

“Knew you couldn’t do it. You’re just spouting your usual bullshit and-“

“Inuyasha! You are so-” Miroku grit his teeth. Inuyasha wasn’t going to believe him if he didn’t say something, was he? But Kouga was listening, so he couldn’t be explicit. But… he could do this. If it would make Inuyasha finally believe him, he could do this and still retain some small shred of dignity. Dear Buddha protect him from every having to be this open about sex again, however. “I like your mouth.”

“That’s one thing,” Inuyasha said after a long pause. He obviously still didn’t trust Miroku’s words.

Miroku glanced at Kouga again and lowered his voice even further. “It’s two.”

“Like hell. You’re just picking something.”

“I am not!” Miroku would swear he heard Kouga snorting.

“You gotta do better than that, houshi. I’ve gotta hear more words to tell if you’re still lying.”

“I never lied, dammit!!”

“Bullshit.” Inuyasha face was angry and tight, his ears still flat, and Miroku snarled up at him.

“Dammit! You-“ He punched Inuyasha on the shoulder. No, he had to keep control. Keep calm.

Or if that failed, spit it out quickly so perhaps it wouldn’t be so bad. “I like it when you lick my cock.” It didn’t work terribly well.

Inuyasha crossed his arm over his chest, waiting. “And?”

“Isn’t that enough?!”

“Two things, houshi.”

“You stupid, stubborn idiot!”

Inuyasha didn’t move, just stared at him.

“Fine! I like the cock licking and… and…and…” Miroku swallowed heavily and closed his eyes as his cheeks heated again. “And my bottom.”

Inuyasha was silent a moment before he spoke. “I lick your ass?”

Miroku ignored the question. “You didn’t say I had to describe the acts, Inuyasha, simply that you wished me to tell you two sources of pleasure. I have done so!”

Inuyasha growled slightly and Miroku opened his eyes. “And I wanna know what you’re talking about! Whaddaya mean, I lick your ass?”

“Will you keep your voice down!”

“Fuck no!”

“Inuyasha!”

Inuyasha growled. “What? Tell me what you mean! I lick your butt cheeks or somethin’?”

I’m not answering this, Miroku thought, flushing hotly.

“Miroku? I wanna know what the hell I do!”

“Miroku! Just fucking tell me!” Inuyasha yelled.

Miroku glared up at him. Why wouldn’t he simply keep his mouth shut?! “You lick around… you put your tongue in… “ How did anyone ever discuss subjects like this! He’d never had a problem where women were concerned, but saying this to Inuyasha, in front of everyone? No matter how quiet he kept his voice, he couldn’t stop flushing. “It’s where you put your cock, Inuyasha, and that is the last I’m saying on the subject! Believe me or not, I don’t care at this point!”

Inuyasha’s pupils dilated as he stared back. He licked his lips, his eyes straying down to Miroku’s groin and the monk knew he was trying to envision it. He couldn’t believe how wildly uncomfortable it was to know that Inuyasha was thinking of him that way, even after everything that had happened.

But truthfully, everything lately had always happened when Inuyasha wasn’t quite in his right mind. This was…entirely different.

“You like that, huh?” Inuyasha finally asked. “Someone…licking you there?”

Miroku nodded once, still glaring, and shivered at the look he got in return. He felt his cock twitch. And just like that, Inuyasha’s entire body changed. He straightened, his eyes wide as he sniffed slightly at the air. One side of his mouth quirked up in the first smile Miroku had seen in days.

“You really do like it, don’t you?”

“I have just said so, haven’t I?! So now,” Miroku took a deep breath, trying to just get past this and onto the rest of the day without further incident. “are you willing to come to the spring and get this taken care of?”

Inuyasha was still staring at him intently and Miroku shifted uncomfortably. He had the urge to squirm at the strangely focused, curious look on Inuyasha’s face, and suddenly thought of looking up into golden eyes for once as his body was entered. It suddenly sank in what this would mean.

He was supposed to let Inuyasha take his body, during the day, while they were both awake and aware. Willingly have sex with Inuyasha when there was nothing between them but friendship; it was demeaning to them both. He’d be lucky if Inuyasha didn’t run away from the idea so fast he-

“So where’s this damn pool? We’d better get going if we’re gonna do this before nightfall.” Inuyasha stared at him closely. Miroku barely resisted the urge to take a step back. That look on his face was wrong. Something was wrong. He hadn’t seen that look on Inuyasha’s face before without… red eyes.

What was going on?

Dark golden eyes ran down his body and back up to his face in one slow look. Miroku felt himself blush all the way down to his toes. Kouga grunted from behind Inuyasha and walked past them

“It’s just a couple hour’s walk this way. For slow bastards like yourselves.”

Inuyasha started to follow and stopped as he realized Miroku was standing still, staring after him. “If my fucking youkai won’t let you fucking leave, then this is the only way, right?” Inuyasha asked at the look on Miroku’s face.

“I- yes.” This was wrong. When had Inuyasha suddenly decided that he was comfortable with this? Not that Miroku wanted him uncomfortable, but being the ‘rational’ one in this scenario was what kept Miroku’s mind occupied. He wasn’t used to Inuyasha doing what everyone knew was the best thing for them.

“So let’s get at it, then. I am NOT gonna hurt you like this anymore. If leavin’ won’t do the trick, then we’ll do what we fucking have to. And I ain’t gonna come into you before I go youkai if we don’t hurry up, so move it, monk.”

He yanked at Miroku’s arm, shoving him ahead with a loud slap against his ass.

Miroku yelped and stumbled, staring back at him. What in the world had gotten into Inuyasha? He was acting like a totally different person.

“Move it, monk. I’m gonna see what it feels like to be inside you when I can actually remember what’s happening,” Inuyasha said softly. With a startled stumble, Miroku stepped away from him. What in the name of the gods did he mean by THAT?

Miroku swallowed as he turned to keep walking. Inuyasha didn’t mean it that way, he told himself. He had no interest in Miroku that way, when he wasn’t youkai. He wasn’t thinking about sexual thoughts or sex or…anything but helping out a friend.

By the way his body sweat and his cock began to rise, he didn’t think his body believed him.