A Goddess from the Past

Chapter 14

Sesshomaru quickly unlocked the door to their room. He had wanted teleport himself directly to the room but remembered that Kagome had told him not to use his powers. Once he burst into the room, he couldn’t believe what he saw.

‘Welcome Lord Sesshomaru. Before you try anything, let me just warn you, that if you do anything rash, everyone at this resort will die’. Kikyo smirked as she saw Sesshomaru clench his fists. ‘Now that we have the ground rules set, we can talk business. There are two ways this meeting can go. One, you will become my mate, and leave with me, or two, you can have Kagome… dead’.

Sesshomaru bowed his head down, then gave a soft snort. Kikyo stared at him, wondering what he had planned. ‘Do you honestly… think that I will get mated… to filth like you?!?’. He lunged towards Kikyo, not knowing what she was capable of doing.

With just as much speed, Kikyo plunged a sacred dagger into Kagome’s naval, feeling it rip through her skin. Sesshomaru’s eyes widened, not believing that she could be that fast. Kagome screamed with pain as blooded spurted out. Kikyo pulled the dagger out of the goddess, then leaped back. Sesshomaru caught his mate, feeling his heart get pierced as well.

‘Well, Lord Sesshomaru, I guess you chose option two. I’m sorry that I couldn’t fulfill your request, but let me give you the satisfaction of knowing that Kagome will never be able to bear children. You see this dagger?’. The miko raised the blood stained weapon. ‘Naraku gave it to me. When used properly, this dagger will poison the female’s womb, making it impossible for her to be with a child’.

Sesshomaru held on to Kagome tightly, his eyes bleeding red. ‘So… Lord Sesshomaru… Your mate can’t even bear a child. She’s nothing more than a whore. Come with me, and I will give you as many pups as you want, along with the most incredible time ever’.

A whip of light shot out, heading for the clay priestess. A pink barrier formed around her, protecting her. ‘I’m stronger than you think, Sesshomaru. Naraku has merged with me, and until I get you, you can’t hurt me, and Kagome will stay the same. I’ll give you a week’s time to consider my offer. You’ll know where to find me’. With that, she disappeared.

‘Kagome… I’m so sorry… Please, hold on… I’ll save you…’. He took her back to the past, praying to the great gods, that she would be okay.

Sesshomaru waited, like before, as the doctors tended to Kagome. ‘Lord Sesshomaru. Your mate is fine now, though she will not…’. He growled, silencing the old man. ‘You don’t need to go on. I know what has happened. You are free to go’. The elderly man bowed down once more, then left.

The elegant Lord immediately went to his mate, pained to see her in that condition. Kagome’s eyes slowly opened, and were soon filled with tears. She turned away from her mate, sobbing uncontrollably. ‘My love… Words can’t express how sorry I am… Kagome?’.

‘Why?!? Why are you apologizing when you have done nothing wrong? I’m the one who has brought you so much pain, so much sorrow. I’ve been a huge burden. Even when I try to do something for you, it ends terribly. Now, I can’t even give you the one thing you wanted the most’. Kagome cried, unable to control her tears.

‘Kagome…’. Sesshomaru didn’t know how much more he could take. He felt terrible, seeing Kagome like this. He hugged her, whispering comforting words in her ears. Kagome sobbed into his shoulder, lost in a world of despair.

When Kagome fell asleep from exhaustion, Sesshomaru sat down close to her, talking to his beast. ‘You fool… How could you let her get hurt?’, his beast yelled at him. ‘If you’re just going to tell me how worthless I am, save it, I can do a great job of that myself’. His beast calmed down and decided to offer some advice instead of scolding him.

‘Right now… our mate… she is unable to forgive herself. She feels as though she has let you down, and needs to know that she hasn’t. Tell her… Tell her how she really makes you feel, and stop hiding yourself from her. If there has been one time that she truly needs you, it’s now’.

Sesshomaru sat there, not believing that his rough, uncontrollable beast, had actually said something reasonable. He took off his armor and laid down next to Kagome, thinking about what his beast said, hoping for the millionth time that day, that everything would work out okay.


‘Naraku… If this doesn’t work, I sure as hell hope that you have a back-up plan for this. Those two… I don’t think that they’ll…’. ‘Will you STOP complaining and being such an insecure bitch?! I can’t think if you’re asking me all these questions’. Naraku sighed, still trying to think of way to get out of the clay wench. Kikyo sat down by a tree and closed her eyes. If she couldn’t have Sesshomaru in the real world, then she would have to make do with the fantasy world for now.


Kagome woke up with Sesshomaru at her side, sleeping peacefully. A sharp pain in her belly reminded her of what had happened. The goddess closed her eyes and tried to push all the thoughts from her mind. Her heart and soul felt like they had been wrenched out and shattered, never again to be pieced together. ‘I really don’t deserve someone like Sesshomaru… I can’t do anything right, and on top of that, I can’t even do what females were created to do’.

Tears slid down her cheeks, but Kagome quickly brushed them away. ‘I’m sorry… My beloved Sesshomaru’. She disappeared, leaving a note in her place. Kagome grabbed the sacred mating knives and headed off to the gardens, where they became soul-mates. She cut herself, then repainted the ancient design. She took a deep breath, and began reciting the spell. The spell to separate their souls and to erase all his memories of her.


Sesshomaru squinted into the sunlight as he woke up, his arm searching for his mate. He sat up when his hand touched paper instead of skin. He didn’t even need to read it, he knew where Kagome had gone. Within a blink of an eye, Sesshomaru was in the gardens, spilling out his heart and soul.

‘Kagome! Stop! I don’t want to forget you! You mean EVERYTHING to me! Please Koi, don’t leave me… I LOVE YOU!!!’.

White light surrounded all of Japan, alerting the elders of the situation. When the light finally dissipated, Kagome hugged herself, her heart, soul, and mind, broken into millions of pieces. With her head ducked down, she walked away from Sesshomaru, never looking back.


Kikyo could barely contain her happiness. The plan hadn’t gone exactly as they wanted, but Kagome managed to separate their souls, which was even better. ‘Sesshomaru won’t remember anything about by reincarnation… Finally… He will be mine’.

The elders arrived in the Western Lands, knowing that the worst had happened. Sesshomaru was standing in the grass. Before him, was the design, painted in Kagome’s blood. The Lord clenched his fists and growled. He could feel the memories disappear, leaving him one by one.

After a few minutes, the only things he had managed to hold on to, were her smile, her everlasting scent, and his love for her. ‘Lord Sesshomaru…’.

‘I must find her, I need to find the one I feel so strongly for… The one whose smile will light up even the darkest night… The one whose smell haunts me… The one… I loved so dearly’.


Kagome merely waved her arm, hiding her scent. She continued to walk on, lost in a world of pain and despair. Her mind thought of only one person, the one person she had decided to leave behind. She longed for his touch, and to hear his voice call out her name. Her eyes wanted to cry, but she had no tears left.

With each beat of her heart, Kagome could feel herself grow weaker. Suddenly, Kagome clenched her teeth together and closed her eyes. A single tear ran down her face. She needed to see him once more. Just one more time.


The elders searched frantically for Lady Kagome and were relieved beyond belief when they saw a familiar black haired female. 'Lady Kagome! We have finally found you. Lord Sesshomaru has request to see you!'.

Kikyo turned around in mock surprise. 'Oh... I'm so sorry for leaving... I now realize how important Sesshomaru is to me!'. The elders looked at her carefully. Sure, she LOOKED like Kagome, but she smelled of dirt and bones. Assuming she fell down, this female's aura and presence just didn't seem like Kagome's. When Kagome entered a room, everyone in it would have the urge to smile.

The woman that stood before him now... There was something different... 'We will take you to Lord Sesshomaru then! Come...'.

Kikyo smiled to herself as she followed the old demons. It didn't matter that she had to be Kagome to Sesshomaru. As long as she had him...

Kagome tied her hair up, covered her head with a silk cloth, and made sure that her scent was covered. Keeping her head down, she walked up to one of Sesshomaru’s guards and said in a fake accent, ‘I have come from a faraway land in seach of the Western Lands, ruled by Lord Sesshomaru. Is this the place I seek for?’.

The guard looked at her suspiciously. ‘Yes, this is the place, though there is a barrier. Why have you come?’. Kagome quickly blurted out, ‘I have come… err… to be of service to Lord Sesshomaru’. The guard sighed, ‘We get plenty of demons who want to serve Lord Sesshomaru. Although I could refuse to let you in right this moment, somehow, you seem to have a kind heart, so I will let you pass. BUT…I must take you to Lord Sesshomaru’.

In a moment of panic, Kagome forgot about the cloth and grabbed onto the soldier. ‘Please… Let me in without seeing him… Sesshomaru-sama will not notice if I go in’.

The guard stared in disbelief when he saw her face. ‘Lady Kag…’.


‘Lord Sesshomaru…’. The silver-haired lord turned around and demanded, ‘Have you found her yet?’. ‘Yes, my Lord. Kagome-sama is waiting in the living room’. ‘Okay then… That is all for now. If she is not the one, I will notify all of you and the search will be continued tomorrow’.

The Elders nodded then left the castle. Sesshomaru covered his aura and went down to the dining room. He was going to make sure that she was the right one before meeting her. Sesshomaru quietly slid the door open and peered in. Inside, he could see the female looking at dining room as though she had never seen it before.

When Sesshomaru sniffed the air, he was almost sure that the elders had found the wrong person. All it smelled of was death, dirt, and clay. Clay… Sesshomaru didn’t know why, but somehow he knew that there was a connection…

Kikyo turned around and sat back down. Sesshomaru was taking an awfully long time and Kikyo was getting impatient. ‘Just wait a bit longer… Think of all the things you’ll get to do with him’, Kikyo thought to herself, smiling at her dirty dreams.

The woman surely looked like the one Sesshomaru was looking for, but everything he remembered about her, didn’t fit. First her smell, and now her smile. ‘Well… I won’t find the truth by just standing here…’. With that, he walked into the dining room, determined to discover the truth.


After listening to what Kagome had to say, the guard sat there, pitying the demoness. ‘Keizo, I need you to promise me that you will not tell anyone, and that you will not keep this at mind’. ‘I can promise to not tell anyone, but I can only try my best to not think about it too much. There is something that I think you should know though…’. Kagome gave him a look that told him to continue.

Keizo took a deep breath before he continued. ‘The main reason I was so surprised when I saw you, was because… The elders had already found someone that was supposed to be you. Sesshomaru had sent them out to look for you, since they had seen you before. Anyhow, would you happen to know who is pretending to be you?’.

‘Yes… I know her. I know her all too well. Once upon a time, she was my enemy, but if she can make Sesshomaru happy, I will leave them be. Putting that aside, I would just like to thank you for everything you have told me, and for listening to me talk’. She stood up and got ready to leave.

‘Lady Kagome?...’. She looked back at the kind soldier. ‘Yes?’. ‘Umm… Well, I’ve heard that when two soul-mates are separated, the one who is separated by the other, loses all his or her memories of the partner. I don’t think Sesshomaru has lost all of his though. When the elders found Sesshomaru, he was standing in the grass, and he said that he needed to find the one whose smile could light up even the darkest nights, the one whose scent haunts him, and the one… He loved so dearly.’

Kagome held her tears back, and stood up. ‘Thank you… For telling me that’. She began walking away, leaving a disappointed soldier. ‘Are you really going to let your former enemy take away Sesshomaru? After gathering the courage to come back, are you willing to see him, in the arms of your enemy? If you are, I will honor your decision, but I’m just going to tell you that you have let me down, my Lady’.

Kagome closed her eyes, pained by his words, though she knew that he spoke the truth. ‘Keizo, you do not need to address me as your Lady, for I am not anymore. I shall leave with these parting words. I’m sorry to have disappointed you, but my heart aches and I fear that I cannot give Sesshomaru what he deserves. Farewell, good soldier, and serve Lord Sesshomaru well’.

Keizo ran forward and grabbed Kagome by the arm. ‘I’m sorry, Lady Kagome, for making you forget this, but did you not come to serve Lord Sesshomaru as well? If you still want to work for him, I can take you to the upper maid’s room, but if you don’t, I will lead you back to the entrance’.

She stopped, realizing what he had said. ‘So, Lady Kagome, where will it be?’. ‘Keizo, I don’t know how to thank you enough. Please, would you take to me to where the cooks are? I think I’ll stay hidden for a bit longer’. The soldier sighed and rolled his eyes, ‘If that’s what you want. I still think that you should just go jump in and scare the hell out him’.

Keizo chuckled to himself as he imagined what Sesshomaru would look like with 2 Kagome’s. With the silk cloth covering her head again, Kagome followed Keizo to the kitchen. ‘Please… Don’t tell anyone about this, okay? I… I don’t know if I’m ready to face him anytime soon, so…’.

‘Don’t worry, Lad-’, Kagome muffled him before anyone could hear. ‘Make sure you don’t let things slip by like that’. Keizo nodded and saluted as he left Kagome. She smiled at him, happy to have found someone like him to talk to.


As soon as Kikyo saw Sesshomaru enter the room, she ran to him and hugged him. ‘Oh, Sesshomaru! I’ve missed you so much! I’m sorry for leaving you, can we get back together now? I have realized my mistake!’. Sesshomaru pulled her off of him, and merely said, ‘If I’m going to talk to you, I would like to be able to breathe. Now, go wash that disgusting scent off of you.’

Kikyo held back the temptation to yell at him, and calmly gave him an embarrassed look instead, ‘Sesshomaru… my dear… I seem to have forgotten how to get there. Will you take me up?’. The Lord’s eyes narrowed in suspicion as he lead the way.

‘Is this person really Kagome? Is she really the one that I seek, or is she trying to deceive me, and take her place as Kagome? And why does the word ‘clay’ remind me of something bad?’. All the thoughts clouded his mind and didn’t even notice when Kikyo screamed in terror at the bathing room he had taken her to.

She wrapped a towel around herself and ran out, pointing an accusing finger at Sesshomaru. ‘WHO. THE. HELL. WAS. IN. THAT. BATHING. ROOM?!?’. Sesshomaru didn’t bother looking back, ‘Just one of the guards, after all, it IS their room. I guess you just failed to notice the sign hanging there’.

Kikyo just stood there, her eyebrow twitching with anger. Did Kagome go through this as well, or was Sesshomaru doing all this on purpose, to see if she really was Kagome? ‘Well, Sesshomaru… If this is your little test, I’ll make sure to do well…’, Kikyo thought to herself.


Kagome carefully knocked on the door to the kitchen. She waited for a few moments, and suddenly it was flung open by a very flustered looking lady. ‘Hello! Is there something I can help you with?’. ‘Oh, um… My name is… Ka… Karen. I have come from foreign lands to serve Lord Sesshomaru. I was…’.

‘It’s about time you got here!’. Kagome looked at her, confused by what she said. ‘We’ve been asking Lord Sesshomaru to find another cook to help us out, but he kept on ignoring us. We were going to ask Lady Kagome, but just as we were going to, she disappeared. Tragic isn’t it? Sesshomaru hasn’t eaten in a long time, I bet. That’s why we’re so busy preparing food right now! So, come on in and let’s get started!’.

‘Oh… Um… May I know your name?’. ‘Oh yes! My name is Mineko! I am the head chef here!’. Kagome smiled, ‘It’s a pleasure to meet you, Mineko-san’. ‘Oh no! The pleasure’s all mine!’. She rushed Kagome into the kitchens and began telling here where everything was.

While they were chopping up some vegetables, Kagome decided to tell Mineko something. ‘Mineko-san… I’m not sure if you’ve heard yet, but I think Lord Sesshomaru has found Lady Kagome again. Should we prepare something more formal for dinner?’.

Everyone in the kitchen stopped, and Mineko slowly replied, ‘Karen... Well, the thing is… We know what happened. Misa, over there, is a rabbit demon, and well, she heard. Kagome-sama, we want to help you! Please don’t give up to that other woman!’.

Kagome sighed, ‘Please don’t tell me that there are any other rabbit demons’. Mineko put a reassuring arm around her. ‘We are the only others that heard. That’s only 3, plus Keizo. We promise not to tell anyone, but Lady Kagome, please don’t let the imposter take your place!’.

She looked warmly upon her kind new friends. ‘She may not be me, but like I said to Keizo. If she can keep Sesshomaru happy and give him what he deserves, I have no problems with their relationship’. Mineko wasn’t ready give up so soon, ‘What if she can do that, BUT you can give him more than she can?’.

‘Kikyo can give Sesshomaru the one thing he wants the most. Unfortunately, I can’t give that to him anymore. I think that pretty much sums up why I left him in the first place’. Kagome gave a small smile, and quickly said, ‘Why don’t we leave that topic for a while and get lunch ready? I’m sure that Kikyo and Sesshomaru will need something to eat’.

Mineko walked up to Kagome and worked beside her. Just as the food was finished being prepared, Mineko stopped Kagome and gave her a warm smile. ‘No matter what, Kagome-sama, we will stand behind you, giving you our full support. Should you ever decide to go after Lord Sesshomaru again, we will be there to support you’.

After hearing those worlds, Kagome could feel a few pieces of her heart and soul get pieced together again. Her eyes filled with tears as she hugged all the cooks. ‘You’re all the best!’, she sobbed into Mineko’s chest, leaving great wet marks on the demon’s apron. ‘Shh… Don’t worry, Kagome-sama, we’re here for you…’.

The head chef told the others to deliver the food while she took Kagome to their bedroom. ‘Mineko-san… I don’t know what to do…’. Mineko stroked the young demonesses soft hair. ‘It’s okay… Everything will work out fine…’, she said softly, a plan beginning to form in her mind already.

Sesshomaru paced around in his study, thousands of questions arising, none of which he could give a definite answer. Did I really fall for such an ill-tempered woman? Did she really smell as good as I remembered? Was her smile… always filled with such evil and greed?

Desperately, he pushed the questions away and tried his best to remember what his mate really was like. ‘If only there was a way to find out if she was the right one…’, Sesshomaru said to himself.

‘There is. There is a way for you to find out without having to see her in bed, but it still involves mating’. ‘Elder, do you mean just participating in the formal ceremony without the mating marks?’. ‘Sharp as always, Lord Sesshomaru. I know that it is forbidden, but it is also forbidden to deceive another to become mates. You will know, whether or not the two of you are soul-mates or not. If you are not, then you will have to get out of the circle before the ritual is complete’. Sesshomaru nodded, thinking that it was the only way to find out.

Suddenly, the elder began to chuckle. ‘I’m surprised that you haven’t noticed this yet, but if your mate really is a demon, I don’t understand why she is keeping her true form hidden. Not a single pointy ear, fang or tail has come out from her. Go ask her… Maybe you won’t have to go on with the ceremony if she isn’t a demon’.

As soon as Sesshomaru left, the elder began to write a few invitations to the ceremony. Mineko had told him that the imposter would probably find a way to fake a demon’s parts. He could only imagine how much pain the couple had suffered, and was going to do his best to help the lovers.

‘Kagome… You can stop hiding your tail now. Along with your ears and fangs, those can be revealed as well’. Kikyo had a feeling that Sesshomaru would wanted to see those, so she quickly cast an illusion, hoping that he wouldn’t want to touch them.

‘Anything for you, my dear Sesshomaru. Did want to talk to me about something?’. Sesshomaru looked carefully at the parts. ‘Yes. We will be performing the formal mating ceremony tomorrow. There will not be many guests invited, mainly because this is just to make sure you are my mate, and not an imposter’. He watched her facial expression and searched for any sign of nervousness.

Kikyo kept her facial expression still, then replied ‘So, you think I’m a fake?! After all we’ve been through together, you can’t trust me?’. Sesshomaru narrowed his eyes and retorted, ‘After all we’ve supposedly been through, this shouldn’t be so BIG of a deal. Once I find out if you are my soul-mate or not, I will know if I can trust you or not’.

He left without saying another word. Until she was sure he couldn’t hear or sense her, she let out a shriek of anger. ‘He is such an arrogant son of a bitch! If only he didn’t such a pretty face, otherwise I would have put him unto his place…’.

‘Kikyo… I hope you haven’t grown soft. You have to remember our part of the deal. Once you finish your business with Sesshomaru, you have to… kill him’.

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Chapter 14! It didn't take as long as I thought it would, so here it is! Unfortunately, I will be off on a business trip, and I most likely will not have time to update. Hopefully... HOPEFULLY... The internet access at the hotel I will be staying at will not be too expensive, so if that's the case, then I will try to slip in a chapter, or at least a part of it =).

Other than that, I would like to thank Katana, animepunk93, Sethos, Dark_Lightning_Harowen, Youkai No Rin, and Tris for your reviews!!! *luffs you all* ^^ Also, thanks to WhiteTigressDemon for the awesome email =)

~Endless Sorrow