My Humps

Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha.

A/N: Thank you so much for all the awesome reviews!!!

“..” speech

'..' thoughts

WARNING: LANGUAGE!!!! ADULT THEMES!!!! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED. If this sort of things offend you, read no further!!!!!!

Chapter 12. Just one of them days.

The rain continued to pour relentlessly onto the narrow window of Kagome's small apartment. The resonating pound of each drop matching the dreadful stabbing of her heart through and through.

The tiny woman curled tighter, hugging her slim legs closer to her chest. Her blank eyes peering out through the cold glass. Her mouth quivered, but she remained silent burying the scream of hurt and anger deep within herself. Her heart felt tired and heavy, each single breath almost a laborious task in itself. In vain she tries to repress the grimace now surfacing on her pastel pink lips.

Again she looked at the rain, something always drew her to the rain. Her mouth turned up at the corners slightly. Perhaps it was the girlish notion that the heavens cried her unshed tears for her. At least that how she had always believed.

Yes, it was rather childish but it made her feel a little better, after all how many times had she been acquainted with heartbreak? And how many times during those moments did the heavens weep on her behalf?

Her chest tightened painfully a sudden longing awakened from the depths of her soul. The realization of her complete isolation made Kagome shudder involuntarily. Since when had her solitary existence bothered her so much? She chose never to delve into liaisons of the romantic nature ever since the night Sesshoumaru snubbed her publicly. She had since then, always preferred her personal isolation when it came to relationships. She was not being a prude, in her perspective it was just simpler that way, and more simple the better.

A woman like her shouldn't allow her head to be bloated with idealized conceptions of the perfect relationship. That shit just didn't exist right? Kagome gave a long drawn out sigh. 'That' was her problem, no matter how hard she tried she could never see the faults of the other person she was involved with, even given her friends' reluctance about the matter. The phrase 'love is blind', truly epitomizes her whole concept of 'love'. And of course she can thank her romantic heart for that wondrous bullshit.

Kagome's body however, followed the lie, her heart had always made sure of that. Take the case of Sesshoumaru for example. The male was a stark contrast to her, they were complete opposites! But she still stubbornly refused to let go and move on, opting instead to concede to all the crap the royal jackass threw her way.

Just remembering it made her shudder. God that was agony! 'Stupid Sesshoumaru! Stupid heart! Why does it always beat at the most inopportune time?' Kagome pursed her lips, her listless eyes drifting off in contemplative silence.

Her heart. How can a small organ cause so much chaos in her life?

It seemed her heart dominated her body above all else, subjecting her normally sensible and practical mind to conjure up images, words or actions that mask the faults of the other person.

Kagome was in love with a fictional fantasy lover version of Sesshoumaru-she knew that, that was the only conceivable reason why she stuck around given his disrespectful attitude and behavior towards her.

She was however unable to let go, unable to move on, she just didn't know how to. God why was she such a fool? Why won't she grow up and get over the fact that fairy tales just don't apply to this world? She knew her childish infatuation with romance and a lovey dovey Sesshoumaru would only gain her heartbreak in the end. Yet, why can't she stop? Had her supposed revenge really back fired that much?

The thrumming noise of the rain brought her back to reality. She shifted her legs, allowing the slender calve muscles to relax by dexterous ministrations. Within her hearing she could clearly hear the boisterous argument Sango and Jakotsu were currently engaged in. Their voices however, receded far in the background, faint echoes in the many thoughts expressed by her own warring opinions housed in the caverns of her mind.

Still, the tepid pearls of water continued to pelt strongly against the window pane. Kagome stared at the clear torrents cascading down the glass. For some reason, the rain agitated her more so than before.

'Rain, rain go away don't come again another day.....' she mouthed out warily, pressing her forehead against the glass panel. She hummed the familiar nursery rhyme with closed lips and closed eyes. Her mind reaching deep within herself for comfort to buffet against her pain.

Almost unconsciously Kagome spread her palms across the glass, reveling in the way the icy feel permeated through her flesh cooling her inner anguish a fraction.

A gust of wind perforated the joints between the glass and the window frame, hissing viciously at her skin. The sudden chill it brought made her rub her arms roughly in an effort to restore some warmth.

'He's mine.'

'What was that?' she wondered. The air pressure built to a considerable force, enough to exert a push against her small hands.

'Keep away.' It whispered. 'Keep away .... or die.' the frozen tone maliciously whipping past her ears dripping with snake like venom.

Her brows tied in a knot. The wind was talking?

'What the hell?'

Did she have the 'gift' her mother and grandfather had told her about? Kagome remembered how even at a young age of four, she was able to see things others were blind about. And then there were other incidents, where she could feel a strange pulsating power whiplash across her body, of course she never knew why or how it came about, it just comes and goes.

She guessed it was also responsible for the way some youkai had been pulled to her. The young woman furrowed her brows in a delicate frown. Great! Wonderful! More things to complicate her ningen life with!

'Gah! I don't want to think about this, I've got my hands full as it is.' she shied away from the window sill slightly, dreading to hear the creepy voice again. 'Still... the rain...'

Kagome sighed before slumping back on the couch near the window. Her head still bowed with a dejected expression on her face. She peeled her eyes away from the depressing sight of the ominous dark clouds and unceasing rain. It reminded her too much of her predicament, her chest tightened again in response much to her growing chagrin.

'Sesshoumaru, what am I to you?' hurt and rejection flitted across her face. She tensed a fraction, biting her lower lip as an overwhelming urgency to have someone, anyone, embrace her-course through her whole being. She felt so defeated, so utterly lonesome.

'Sesshoumaru.' she thought mournfully.

So there she sat, so very close to tears, her heart still recoiling from the emotional blow inflicted earlier that day. She was still aghast to discover, that deep down she still felt something for the cold lord even through everything. Gritting her teeth together she balled her tiny fists, a frown darkening her countenance.

'He did it again! The bastard did it to me again.' anger surged within her, the scorching flame of which burned her from the inside. 'No, I 'let' him do it to me again.' thought Kagome sadly, the fire dying behind her eyes. Her hands flopped back against her legs hitting them with a solid slap. She was so confused and angry and to top it all off, she's hearing freaky voices in the wind!

She tilted her head back allowing the dark tresses to fall back on the caramel colored cushions where it fanned out in dark swirls of ebony streams. The sapphire luster in her eyes again dying to to a faded blue.

'What else could go wrong?'

A whimper escapes her lips, her abdomen suddenly bursting into painful spasms. She shuts her eyes tightly as another cramp sent her reeling back further into the plush cushions. Kagome began rubbing her middle in soothing circles. A grim realization dawning in her melancholy state of mind, fueling her depression and rankling her ire to rise further.

'You have got .... to be kidding me.' she groaned haltingly trying to get up. A sharp pain shot through her middle. Eyes widening in agony, Kagome winced clutching her abdomen even as beads of tears formed around the rim of her eyes.

Her abdominal muscles had protested against sudden movement to stand up-a stark reminder that her 'favorite' time of the month had indeed come upon her.

''God why me?”

“What was that dear?” asked Jakotsu refraining from his bickering with Sango, who promptly rubbed her chin as she studied Kagome under a practitioner's gaze.

Sango grinned slapping a still clueless Jakotsu soundly on the back, sending the unprepared male stumbling forward. Shaking her head she stuck up her nose in an arrogant manner. “You see Jakotsu, there are just somethings 'she males' are not meant to know or understand.” she remarked with an air of superiority.

Jakotsu opened his mouth to say a few choice words when a shrill cry cut through the scene. A robust figure with a head of auburn red hair, pulled up to two pony tails stomped angrily forward, basked in an animalistic glow.

“Give the girl a freakin break you hormone confused numbskull!” screamed Ayame, suddenly appearing carrying a large plastic bag.

“Listen here you loud mouthed trollop! I'll have you know that Kagome has no secret too 'secret' for her bosom buddy Jakotsu!”

“Geez can't a female even bleed in peace around here?” huffed Ayame glaring irritably at the only male present.

“B-bleed?” paled Jakotsu taking a decisive step back. “As in blood?”

“Nah! As in freakin tomato sauce, of course blood! What the hell do you think circulates around living things? Hydrochloric acid?” spat Sango.

“Well it's the first I hear of it!” huffed Jakotsu, his cheeks blushing madly. “S-so blo-blood huh?”

Ayame's eyes shone in a sadistic gleam, with her eyes twinkling she strode casually towards the flabbergasted male. “Ya, you know, for fertility's sake, 'WE' females need to leak out some of the red stuff as part of our monthly cycle so we could spore lil ones.”

Jakotsu blinked innocently. “Is that so?..... Funny, why don't I bleed then hmmm?” he asked placing his manicured hands on his waif like hips.

Kagome gasped shaking her head, a pink hue blossoming on her pretty cheeks even as Sango fell anime style onto the carpeted floor twitching. The ookami (wolf) youkai smirked with wolfish glee.

“What-does-that-tell-you?”

Jakotsu pursed his lips in deep thought. “That I've still yet to reach my puberty?” he asked in a quirky chirpy tone, batting his curved lashes.

“Gah! I give up! I have better things to do than to argue with the homo-conspicuous dimwit!” yelled Ayame stomping away still clutching the bag of groceries.

“Homo-phobie!” cried Jakotsu picking up a bowl of ramen, intending to hurl it to the ookami's head.

“You wanna say that to my face, you fucking corpse bride of Frankenstein!!” screeched Ayame popping her head out from the kitchen, holding a preserved cucumber in on hand. “Don't make me shove this jerkin up your...”

“Stop it! Stop it the both of you!”

Kagome jumped in between her two warring friends, she separated both using the length of both arms. “Please just calm down! I've had a lot to deal with this afternoon and I don't want to deal with something like 'this' right now. Ayame, put down the pickle!” she ordered in a harsh tone.

“K-Kagome... I'm sorry” apologized Jakotsu.

“Me too Kagome-chibi...” joined Ayame.

Kagome sighed. Carrying the heavy burden called 'Sesshoumaru' clearly, has her at wits end.

“Thanks, you guys I really appreciate it.” she said wearily rubbing her tired eyes with fisted hands. “I'll just snooze for a bit ok? Wake me up after an hour.”

“Uh, aren't you gonna listen to Sesshoumaru's message?” interjected Sango.

“Since when am I at his beck and call? It's outside office hours!” snapped Kagome irritably.

“Whoah! You're sure worked up! What did the mutt do exactly?”asked Sango unaware of her friend's inner turmoil.

“I'll tell you guys later ok?” Kagome replied in a strained voice, her eyes pleading.

“Um sure, yea, sorry I brought it up. We'll talk when you're ready.” reassured Sango patting the other woman's shoulder.

Kagome smiled before walking silently back to her room.

“See what you did?” hissed Ayame giving Jakotsu a rather vicious jab in the ribs.

“Ugh!” gasped Jakotsu, nursing his bruised ribs. “What was that for you brute! Sango was the brainiac that upset her more!”

“How am I supposed to know Sesshoumaru got on her pissy side?” cried Sango defensively as she held up both arms.

“Ohhhhh!” moaned Jakotsu huskily.

“What the friggen hell!” gasped Ayame backing away from the swooning male.

“Huh?” gawked Sango

In background, Jakotsu has a far off expression, hands clasped together, held reverently in front of his chest. A large drool is seen figuratively on the corner of his mouth.

“Ah gawd! I've seen this shit before.” cried an exasperated Ayame massaging her temples. “The idiot's in freakin la la land!” she added while pouring boiling water onto a rather large bowl of instant ramen Jakotsu had held previously.

“Eh?” Sango stood looking from Ayame and the still dreamy eyed Jakotsu. “What?”

“His very name sends delicious shivers of delight down my spine.” mewed Jakotsu stretching lazily across the couch Kagome had earlier occupied. His tall stature ensuring his limbs went past the arm rests.

“Psh! Shivers of delight my furry ass! I'm sure your shriveled nuts were so scared they nearly popped off the the scrawny branch they're attached to!” scoffed Ayame, eyes ablaze.

“What are you two talking about!!!” roared Sango.

Ayame rolled her eyes, an exasperated sigh escaping her lips. Beckoning Sango by means of wiggling her index finger, the ookami's mouth twitched to a smug looking grin. “Observe this doc....” she whispered secretively. “Sesshoumaru....”

“Ohhhhhh!”

“Shit that's cool! Say it again!” encouraged Sango, noting the male's flustered reaction, at the mere mention of the young lord's name. The ookami's eyes gleamed maliciously, puffing out her chest and narrowing her almond shaped eyes she strutted around Jakotsu. “Sesshoumaru! Sesshoumaru! SesshouMARUUUUUU!!!” she sang.

“Ohhhhh!... Ohhhhhh! OHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!”

“Hah! You see! The she male's in horny heaven!” Ayame pointed out, laughing in hysterics.

“Fascinating.” inferred Sango pulling out a pen and paper. “I-I've got to write this to my journal! I can't possibly just commit this to memory!”

Jakotsu snapped out of his dreamlike state. “Sango! What are you doing?”

The scientist held up one hand, motioning for him to be quiet.

“What does it look like she's doing?” grinned Ayame. “You've peeked her interests you oddball, so of course she'll want to write down a theorem about you...”

“Me?... I don't want to be part of some cooky thesis!” objected Jakotsu, a girlish pout gracing his glossy lips.

“Actually that's putting it too fucking mildly, I was aiming for 'Lab rat' ne?” retorted Ayame as she took a sounding slurp eating her ramen.

“Why you!!!”

Knock. Knock.

“Better get that Wakko Jakko, could be important.” snickered Ayame, lifting her soup splattered face from her bowl.

Jakotsu scowled darkly. “You know, now that I've had a good look at you, you shouldn't stand near natural light like that.” he spat out.

“Really? Please impart me some of your fucking queer wisdom and tell me why-ever not?”

“Your face looks too much like a dessicated butt of a rhinoceros of course! Especially with such poofy, bulbous hair do. Tsk, tsk! What did you use? Laundry soap?” retaliated Jakotsu a thin satisfied smile spreading across his lips as the indignant ookami growled low and spun on her heels towards the bathroom.

Jakotsu chuckled behind his hand, as he walked briskly toward the resounding knock on the door. His satin slippers glided across the floor, he swerved his hips with each step. “Who is it?” he asked sweetly, as he opened the door slowly revealing the dimunitive form of one ugly, slimy looking, frog-like youkai.

“It is I, Jaken, most loyal retainer to the glorious and most honored lord, Sesshoumaru!”

“Ohhhhhhhh!” THUD.

“Don't say that name again!” Jakotsu warned, one eye twitching wildly.

“What name?... Oh Lord Sesshoumaru's?”

THUD.

“Shut it, you imbecile!”

Jaken's face reddened like a plump tomato, shots of steam shooting out of his ears.

“Human, stop wasting my time! Why shouldn't I say the name lord Sesshoumaru (THUD)? When I serve under milord Sesshoumaru (THUD). And cease that infernal obeisance before me at once. I am not worthy enough to be worshiped as thus.. Only Lord Sesshoumaru (THUD) is!”

“TEMEEEE (derogatory form of 'you')..... I'll show your snotty green hide...” cried Jakotsu pulling himself out of his fainting stupor.

PUNCH.

BIFF.

KICK.

PINCH.

SLAP.

The man, delivered hit after hit on the gaping youkai, who far too shell shocked to even do anything.

“Holy Sardines human! Desist at once! Ekkkkk!” he croaked as Jakotsu, twisted his head in a secure head lock.

“Jaken-sama?”

“Na, little girl you shouldn't be witness to this type of thing! Go back to your mommy!” ordered Jakotsu, not taking his eyes off the struggling youkai.

“I-I don't have a Momma.”

Tears sprang on her large doe-like eyes, each drop illuminating with a gem like quality. Jakotsu's anger waivered. “Now! Now! I'm sorry to make you cry. Hush now baby. What's your name?”

“Rin.” she replied shyly, shuffling her right toe in the floor. Jakotsu faltered. The name rang a bell somewhat.. where did he come across it again?

“Gyahhhhh! Unhand her now you filthy scum of a man! Milord would be most angry if he hears you've touched his daughter!” screamed Jaken in outrage, shaking both fists in the air.

“Heh?” Jakotsu turned abruptly to the girl. “Who's your father that I should be afraid of him?” he mocked lightly.

The little girl beamed a smile. “Sesshoumaru-tousan.”

THUD.

'Damn it! I knew her name sounded familiar.'

Sesshoumaru suave voice flowed through his thoughts as though it had been played back from Kagome's answering machine.