How Kagome Got Her Groove Back

Hey ladies and dudes! This is my first storyyyy! Eeeeeee! Obviously, words of encouragement will be much appreciated, but don’t be shy if you have a criticism. I can take it : )

Draco’s hot breath danced on the dainty shell of Hermoine’s ear as he pinned her wrists tightly above her head, grinning wickedly at her flushed cheeks and swollen lips. His little witch let out a small purr and arched her back, preparing herself for the imminent sensation of his big, throbbing, magic wand thru-

“Hey Kagome, whatcha reading?”

“WAHHH!”

The girl jumped ten feet up from her chair, furiously trying to minimize the screen on her computer, her heart racing and cheeks glowing beet red as she turned to survey the intruder. “Oh my GOD, Souta!” She clutched her chest and heaved a huge breath of relief, confident her little brother wouldn’t pick up on what had actually been occurring. “UGH! SOUTA! Are you kidding me? You can’t just walk in on people like that! Does a closed door not mean anything to you?”

Souta looked affronted at his sister’s obvious overreaction, and didn’t bother hiding the edge to his voice when responding with a flippant, “Uhhh, the door wasn’t closed.”

The blush on her cheeks steadily creeping down to her neck, Kagome felt a pang of guilt at the look on Souta’s face. He really hadn’t meant anything by it, but willing or unwilling, he’d walked in on his older sister in a very delicate and compromising situation, and her anger, fueled primarily by utter embarrassment, hadn’t fully subsided. “Ok FINE, Souta. That’s not the point.”

“But…”

“SOUTA! Listen, okay?!?!” Desperate to hide her deviant internet indulgence, Kagome made up a sloppy and entirely unbelievable lie, but her younger brother’s blind admiration for her made it likely he’d believe whatever ridiculous drivel she decided to spew from her mouth, a fact she was not above taking complete advantage of, especially in her cornered state. “I was doing, like, really important homework, and I really wanted to concentrate, and now it’s totally messed up.”

Kagome watched as worry and remorse quickly flashed across her brother’s deep brown eyes, and cut him off as he tried to stutter an apology.

“It’s fine, it’s not that messed up. It’s an easy fix, and it was my fault for not shutting the door. But could you maybe just knock? Or, I don’t know, wear a freaking bell or something?” She had hoped he wouldn’t pick up the last sentence if she said it under her breath, but the indignant look that had returned to his young features was indicative of the fact that he’d heard it loud and clear.

He sighed, and shot an annoyed look in her general direction. “I’ll knock, okay? Jeeeeeeez.” He turned and left the room, shutting the door behind him. Moments later, it was clear he’d shared his frustrations with their mother, because Kagome heard her mother’s muffled yell from downstairs.

“Kagoooome, Souta gets to use the computer in thirty minutes, okay?”

Her anger returning full force, she stomped to the door, flung it open, and bellowed, “MOM! I’m doing homework, okay? If you want me to be able to go to the Feudal Era and save the whole stupid world and not totally flunk out of school, I need to be able to use the computer when I get home. Souta can have the stupid computer to play his stupid games or whatever when I’m done studying, okay?”

“….Forty-five minutes then. And you watch your tone, hmm? We know you’re under a lot of stress, but that gives you no excuse to be disrespectful to your family, your brother included!”

“FINE. I’ll fail everything.” She gave a rather loud and dramatic sigh, turned on her heel, slammed the door behind her and collapsed in the chair with her hands over her eyes and moaned at what a brat she’d become. She knew perfectly well she was being ridiculous. Souta was just as entitled to the computer as she, especially considering what she was doing on the computer, and, truth be told, she really would be in danger of failing her classes if she didn’t turn the damn thing off and go do her homework.

Strange things had been happening in Kagome’s world as of late. Arguably, not as weird as being pulled through a well hundreds of years into the past only to learn she was some long-dead priestess’s reincarnation before teaming up with demons to find some shiny rock and ultimately prevent the country’s ultimate destruction, but pretty odd all the same. For some reason, absolutely everything had been getting on her last nerve, and her short fuse was becoming increasingly apparent to her friends and family, the knowledge of which wracked her entire body with guilt, which only served to make her more annoyed. To be frank, she was about ready to chuck her remaining jewel shards down the well, conveniently tied to a particularly ill-tempered wolverine, and just be done with the whole ordeal.

But perhaps even more unsettling, and very likely the cause of her sour mood, was the very reason her sweaty hand had been clutching that mouse so feverishly as she read the erotic couplings of the Harry Potter gang. Kagome Higurashi, reincarnation of Kikyo, jewel-hunter extraordinaire, and Inuaysha’s sweet and innocent companion, was a-hankering for a spank-ering.

She couldn’t name a single day in the past two months she hadn’t woken up in the middle of the night a sweaty tangle of sheets and flailing limbs after a particularly vivid image of herself wrapped up in the arms of one man or another, it cycled through nearly every male she’d ever laid eyes on, and as mortified as she was to admit she wanted to jump the bones of pretty much half of the world’s population, she couldn’t deny that she loved the deliciously warm tingle behind her navel after one of her more in-depth dreams.

And so she’d wandered into the world of internet smut. Kagome had first discover fanfiction in junior high. After she’d gone with her friends over winter holidays to watch the first film in the Lord of the Ring’s trilogy, she’d decided that Legolas was easily the most beautiful being she’d ever laid eyes on (she had always been prone to a weakness for men with long, shiny hair), and promptly pored over the web in an attempt to find out his age, hometown, girlfriend, girlfriend’s address (just in case she had to take care of some…business…there), and favorite brand of orange juice. In the process, she’d stumbled across a site dedicated to stories telling the legend of the fellowship’s wet ‘n wild orgy parties, and had decided the idea of putting fictional characters in such compromising situations was indicative of a slight psychological issue on the author’s part, and indeed reeked of mental depravity for the indulgent reader, as well. Kagome had decided then and there she’d be getting her romance the good old fashioned way; Richard Gere movies and cute teenaged pop sensations.

Unfortunately, the Backstreet Boys had failed to materialize on her front doorstep, and a certain white-haired hanyou had put a screeching halt to her ideas of fairy-tale romance, and the recent trend of previously innocent secret-telling sessions at sleepovers turning into downright pornographic accounts about just how much tail her fellow classmates were getting left a rather significant void between Kagome’s legs. Er, in her heart. All in all, physically, Kagome was absolutely ready to “get did,” and rather than glue herself to the television late at night, scrutinizing the scrambled channels for so much as a blurry glimpse of a male derriere, she opted instead for the very thing she had previously considered so ludicrous, and, much to her chagrin, had found it to be a very effective, if only temporary, solution to her rather embarrassing problem.

Kagome sighed, and swiveled in the chair to face the screen again. She wasn’t proud of her behavior, and realized that sooner or later she’d have to deal with it in some way or another before she had a conniption-fit and started breathing fire on anyone who dared to shoot a glance in her direction. Kagome opted for later, and opened up the story once again. Sure, her behavior may have been destructive and unhealthy, but it looked like Pansy was going to join Draco and Hermione during their lovers’ tryst at the Yule Ball, and you had to be off your gourd to think she was going to miss out on a steamy threesome like that.