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for The Teddy Bear

by DiryDaryPinguin

person Vyper
schedule November 18, 2013 at 12:00 AM
I hope for more with bated breath.
schedule November 17, 2013 at 12:00 AM
Hahaha, Inuyasha's a horn dog.

I didn't notice many grammar/punctuation mistakes, so good job on that. The only thing that caught my attention was your phrase "drop more ashes in the fire". Maybe because I'm a pyro and burn things any time there's cool weather, but I don't think that's what you want to say there. Adding ashes to a fire would put it out and I don't think you want that to happen in this case, lol. The idiom is "add fuel to the fire" or something like "dropping a lit match on a pool of gasoline."

Anyways, this is a good start. You've got some good chemistry brewing here and I'm looking forward to what's next.