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June 30, 2014 at 12:00 AM
First of all, I would like to say, that I loved your story, I have been reading it since it was still in the 100+ chapters. I'm sorry for not writing a review in so long, but I thought that I should wait until the story was complete to give my honest opinion. Anyway, I liked both how the story began and how it ended, though I would have like to see the wedding, but I understand that the story had been drawn out long enough. But I will get to that later, first let's start with the beginning. The idea of how Sesshomaru got turned into a regular (albeit very beautiful) dog, ABSOLUTE GENIUS! As far as I know you are the first one to do this, a very original concept, and I loved how it allowed Sesshomaru and Kagome to bond so deeply early on, and it also showed a more vulnerable side to Sesshomaru. But I'm also glad that you allowed them to build their own relationship as a man and woman, it gave them a chance to really get to know each other better and on a deeper scale.
There is just to much for me to give a full review about so I will stick to the highlights, I also liked how that traitor Inu and the former Lady of the West got their comeuppance, "Revenge is a dish best served cold" and whoooo boy did Sesshomaru serve that shit up Sub-Zero style! LOL! Oh man that was awesome. The barrier bags were also a great idea in my opinion, it was a brilliant way to deepen their bond and give Sesshomaru the chance to earn her love, and what better gift to give your loved one then the spoils of your enemies right? The Immortality potion, while a rather cliche idea for stories in general, was also a clever way to keep them together and make sure that they didn't lose anyone important to them, most stories of this category usually have her become some form of half demon via the mating mark or some other B.S. but you pulled this off rather nicely. Also, not to be a total perv on you, but the lemon scenes were HOT! *ahem* Moving on!
Well now comes the part I'm not sure you're going to like, the things I felt were wrong with the story. The first thing I should mention, is the length of the story, namely the chapters and the over-all length of the in general. Don't get me wrong, story is great by all means, but I for one felt that the chapters themselves where a little too short, and that there were too many filler chaps in between the plot. Basically while the chapters were "sweet and to the point" having that many chapters to progress the plot was in my opinion ridiculous, and draws the story out much longer than it needs to be which is something you do a LOT in your stories I noticed. While isn't necessarily a bad thing, not really a good thing either. I know I have no right to complain about your writing style, but just a suggestion, if you have longer chapters and less fillers, it allows you to get to the point of the story faster and for the readers to enjoy the story better. Grammar and error corrections were ok, but they could be better. I know nobody's perfect, but you should probably have your husband or someone at home help you look for the mistakes you missed.
Now for the plot, I really only have one gripe about the plot, namely what happened with Koharu. While I can understand why Sango chose to let Koharu die, I still think he deserved the chance to repent his actions willing or not. Kagura, despite her essentially being in the same boat as Koharu, was given a chance to repent her actions while he was not. To me that seemed little unfair, especially to Sango, since all throughout the Canon, she keeps saying "I'll save you, Koharu, I'll save you!" and now that she gets the chance she lets him go? Da FUCK?! I mean you could have had Sesshomaru use Tenseiga to restore his body and bring him back to life, or was it too long since he died? Well other than that little business I really enjoyed the story, and I personally can't wait for the sequel, you're a great author and I'd love to see more of your work. Later!
There is just to much for me to give a full review about so I will stick to the highlights, I also liked how that traitor Inu and the former Lady of the West got their comeuppance, "Revenge is a dish best served cold" and whoooo boy did Sesshomaru serve that shit up Sub-Zero style! LOL! Oh man that was awesome. The barrier bags were also a great idea in my opinion, it was a brilliant way to deepen their bond and give Sesshomaru the chance to earn her love, and what better gift to give your loved one then the spoils of your enemies right? The Immortality potion, while a rather cliche idea for stories in general, was also a clever way to keep them together and make sure that they didn't lose anyone important to them, most stories of this category usually have her become some form of half demon via the mating mark or some other B.S. but you pulled this off rather nicely. Also, not to be a total perv on you, but the lemon scenes were HOT! *ahem* Moving on!
Well now comes the part I'm not sure you're going to like, the things I felt were wrong with the story. The first thing I should mention, is the length of the story, namely the chapters and the over-all length of the in general. Don't get me wrong, story is great by all means, but I for one felt that the chapters themselves where a little too short, and that there were too many filler chaps in between the plot. Basically while the chapters were "sweet and to the point" having that many chapters to progress the plot was in my opinion ridiculous, and draws the story out much longer than it needs to be which is something you do a LOT in your stories I noticed. While isn't necessarily a bad thing, not really a good thing either. I know I have no right to complain about your writing style, but just a suggestion, if you have longer chapters and less fillers, it allows you to get to the point of the story faster and for the readers to enjoy the story better. Grammar and error corrections were ok, but they could be better. I know nobody's perfect, but you should probably have your husband or someone at home help you look for the mistakes you missed.
Now for the plot, I really only have one gripe about the plot, namely what happened with Koharu. While I can understand why Sango chose to let Koharu die, I still think he deserved the chance to repent his actions willing or not. Kagura, despite her essentially being in the same boat as Koharu, was given a chance to repent her actions while he was not. To me that seemed little unfair, especially to Sango, since all throughout the Canon, she keeps saying "I'll save you, Koharu, I'll save you!" and now that she gets the chance she lets him go? Da FUCK?! I mean you could have had Sesshomaru use Tenseiga to restore his body and bring him back to life, or was it too long since he died? Well other than that little business I really enjoyed the story, and I personally can't wait for the sequel, you're a great author and I'd love to see more of your work. Later!
schedule
June 29, 2014 at 12:00 AM
This fic has been a 'page-turner' for sure! I'm sure I speak for all your inpatient fans when I say that the main reason we ask when a certain fic will be updated is because you're one of the best there is. For me, that's especially true when it comes to Sesshomaru/Kagome fics. I've tried reading fics of this pairing by others, but they just can't compare to your skill at writing this pairing while keeping everyone in-character. I'm looking forward to more updates to your other fics! Keep up the great work, Sunset!
schedule
June 29, 2014 at 12:00 AM
Love it it took me about 3 days to read it though
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June 26, 2014 at 12:00 AM
That author's note just made me grin hugely! I've been waiting to finish SWTPF for years!! Wooohoooo!!!
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June 25, 2014 at 12:00 AM
That was an awesome story, and once you write the sequel, you can consider me a reader of that as well. ^_^ Very nicely done. -Kaia Selene of Rose Paw Designs-
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June 24, 2014 at 12:00 AM
That is AWESOME JUST SO WOW
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June 19, 2014 at 12:00 AM
this will be vary hard for her to do but she has to she has a new life that is wait for her and she needs so close the old chapter that is the future no matter how hard it may be for her and her mom. but i think that her mom might have been preparing for this day knowing that someday kogame will not come home to her and have a real future in the past.
schedule
June 13, 2014 at 12:00 AM
ahh inuyasha is finally getting a girlfriend, and i really hope kogame traveling back to her time lefts her return to her kids and her mate after. that would suck if it didn't ..... please update again soon cant wait to read more of this wonderful story:)
schedule
June 11, 2014 at 12:00 AM
aww things are looking up for the artist :) please update again soon :) i cant wait to read more
schedule
May 10, 2014 at 12:00 AM
the wolf sadly i have no pity for.
he know kogame did not desire to be his mate, and she told him this every time they met he chose to ignore the truth that he didn't like. he also know this day was coming but again chose to ignore this as well, add that he lied to kogame about giving them back makes me mad. if he lied about this big matter what makes him a good mate? not much in my book. he lied about the shards and ignored her desire not to be his mate. what more would he ignore if they mated? her not wanting to be pupped? would he rape her to get them?
sorry for the drawn out rant.
please update again soon
he know kogame did not desire to be his mate, and she told him this every time they met he chose to ignore the truth that he didn't like. he also know this day was coming but again chose to ignore this as well, add that he lied to kogame about giving them back makes me mad. if he lied about this big matter what makes him a good mate? not much in my book. he lied about the shards and ignored her desire not to be his mate. what more would he ignore if they mated? her not wanting to be pupped? would he rape her to get them?
sorry for the drawn out rant.
please update again soon