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schedule
March 18, 2007 at 12:00 AM
Very nice please update
schedule
October 21, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Very nice so far. Keep it up
schedule
October 8, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Hurry up and finish this chapter!!!
schedule
October 5, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Very good beginning to your story!! Will be reading it as you update!!
schedule
October 4, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Tokaia, are you accusing me of those things? I did not say those things out of malice so you know; it was simply as a reader. Before you start critisizing someone who you've never even read... you should really think. If I have misspellings and such in my stories I would like to know where. So I can correct them. please ... enlighten me.
btw this story isn't bad, but you might think about using more spacing in between your dialogue. ^_^
keep updating!
btw this story isn't bad, but you might think about using more spacing in between your dialogue. ^_^
keep updating!
schedule
October 3, 2006 at 12:00 AM
You have a very good story in the making here. Keep it up
schedule
October 2, 2006 at 12:00 AM
The other person who reviewed should be warned. When you write something correcting the misspellings of others and tell them to use spellcheck, you should take your own advice. If you don't, you look like a fool.
schedule
October 1, 2006 at 12:00 AM
a LOT of misspellings.....
Here are a few corrections...
Intense.
Making.
Student.
Examining.
Rather.
Adjacent
Staring...
excellant
Beautiful
Beauty
Secret...
Writing.
Began..
Evanescence. . .
there are a lot more, so i should probably suggest that you spell check, you also have a lot of contractions missing as well as words that are in fact NOT words, embarassingly is not a word, but there are synonyms that you can use to replace it. I think I could like the idea in this story had I seen more of a plot formed, I hope that you will make your next chapter long enough to get a REAL idea of where you might be going with this. You also forget the usage of commas, they are a WONDERFUL tool...
You seem to add ING to the ends of words that have e's without removing the e... Like i said, you really need to spell check this. Try writing it out in your microsoft word program and running the spell check feature to make it more inticing to the reader and believe me, you will be happier with the out come. ^_^
Here are a few corrections...
Intense.
Making.
Student.
Examining.
Rather.
Adjacent
Staring...
excellant
Beautiful
Beauty
Secret...
Writing.
Began..
Evanescence. . .
there are a lot more, so i should probably suggest that you spell check, you also have a lot of contractions missing as well as words that are in fact NOT words, embarassingly is not a word, but there are synonyms that you can use to replace it. I think I could like the idea in this story had I seen more of a plot formed, I hope that you will make your next chapter long enough to get a REAL idea of where you might be going with this. You also forget the usage of commas, they are a WONDERFUL tool...
You seem to add ING to the ends of words that have e's without removing the e... Like i said, you really need to spell check this. Try writing it out in your microsoft word program and running the spell check feature to make it more inticing to the reader and believe me, you will be happier with the out come. ^_^