rate_review Reviews

I really like this story alot. Can you please write some more chapters?

I really like this story alot. Can you please write some more chapters?

the beautiful thing about fanfiction is that a reader can see things from the perspective and imagination of another. seeing this through your eyes has been enlightening.

thank you,
ginny

wow!
absolutely clever!
im working on a fic myself
would it be alright if i used some of your ideas of how she comes to terms with herself?
e-mail me with your answer or questions on what i plan to use if you let me.
xxpuppyearsxx@hotmail.com

You wanted the opinion of adult readers. Here is mine: The story was well written you should write more but I didn´t like the result. What exactly was the enlightment? That she is jealous because she loves him and it hurts when he sees Kikyou? And Inuyasha is not selfish? Why do you think he is always visiting Kikyou? Not because he wants to fuck her like some immature writers (mostly teenagers who shouldn´t visit this site in the first place) always use this as a plot. No, he feels guilty. He thinks it´s his fault that she is suffering and that he couldn´t protect her from it. That they were so easily tricked by Naraku. He wants to ease HIS mind and lessen HIS guilt. And THAT is what they call being selfish although no one can blame him. After all he is half human. The other point is I disagree with the way you show Kagome. Kagome is a strong character but not a saint. She has learned to accept Inuyashas and Kikyous "relationship" but that doesn´t mean she likes it. She will always be dissapointed and angry and of course jealous when he will go to her. She will never just smile and think everything is all right when she watches him leaving her alone to see her incarnation.
I don´t know if you follow the Manga but Inuyasha meets Kikyou just by coincidence now when they fight against their enemy and she shows up. He is too preoccupied to become stronger as to run after her anymore. I think that both and also Kagome know that she will die in the end. There is not much time left for her until her body gives away. And I still hope to see more of your work so don´t take this as a flame.

It´s a pity that some writers just know the anime. I don´t like the drawings at all. The characters are more beautiful in the Manga. They couldn´t catch the ethereal beauty of Kikyou or Sesshoumaru. And Kagome looks like a normal average teenager in the Anime whereas in the Manga she is even prettier than Kikyou and has blue eyes. Ugh, I should stop my babbling. Ja ne!

I thought it was powerful and well-written. While it may not be full of lemons, I think it would take an adult to truly understand what you have written.

The rules for AFF say: "Fiction must be Darkfic, Hard R or NC-17."
( http://www.adultfanfiction.net )

Your story does not belong here. Post it on Mediaminer.org or Fanfiction.net if you want criticism.
This is an adult site and stories posted here are required to have adult content.
Go post your G-rated story elsewhere and delete if from here.

Interesting though I can't help but wonder what Inuyasha was thinking, or the reason why he never left Kagome's side to go see Kikyo again.

Wow that was good for once kagome finally saw the light!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Good story I like I like!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hi, you said you wanted some constructive critism, from a mature person... so I just honestly had to speak up and tell you this... WHERE IN THE WORLD did you come up with that?! That was refreshingly brilliant, spectacularly different, and whimsically awesome! I'm utterly nearly speechless, and your story here was a quite different read from others I've usually read. The fact that you chose a POV is great, but what's even more skilled is that you stuck to it very well. Although a paragraph was too long and almost got me lost in it (maybe you should make that one shorter or split it up, but it's so totally up to you) and that Inuyasha proved himself worthy of caring for Kagome, I would have expected him to scream out yelling "bitch!" (tee hee, that's just so Inuyasha). I applaud you and marvel at this fablous piece of work, and to let you know you've earned a spot on my fave list. Now, that is a very rare honour, but I feel I must do so because this work needs to be shown to more people because it's so different! Anyways, I hope you'll keep writing more, and keep up the grrrreat work!