rate_review Reviews

hey, i love your story keep up the good WORK!!

The chapter was short, yes, but good enough to be enjoyed!
All you need is a REAL BISHOUNEN (Like: Naraku, Sesshoumaru, Inuyasha or maybe Kouga!)
;)
and more details....Get those two things and it'll become wonderful!
Heh...I allready like it ALOT! But details could make the greatest wonders...

Heh...MELIKE! ^_^ LOL!


Update soon please!

Okey...The 4th chapter wasn't bad! It was quick, but where's Naraku?
Ain't he coming back from prison? I want my little Kuku!
Heh...Kuku is a nickname I just came up with! I haven't seen anybody else call him Kuku, so...Heh...
DON'T STEAL IT!!!! Ummm....Well...The whole story is very nice! And I like it!
But details would make the greatest wonders!
Heh...Go Kuku! I mean...Naraku! Ahem...Well...Update soon please!

Heh...MELIKE! ^_^

Yeah Hobo (A.K.A. Hojo) is a bastard in this chapter :D

ok, i've only just read the first chapter, and nothing else, but um...that first chapter was really confusing, i dont get it, she was raped so she decides to have sex??? and mirokou, without any foreplay, or even a kiss just f***s her??? arrrghh, it was too confusing i couldn't follow it.

ok, wait, i suddenly got the idea that maybe this first chapter was more like a summary, cause that's how its writtten, so i went and read the next chapter and the beginning of the third, and i have to rephrase what i earlier review, just above this one, and i have to say that hte whole story is confusing, it's not written in any format, it just goes by to quick, like you are writting a summary of it, and not an actual story, you need to go back and edit it to death. this seems like the draft before a rough copy. now i wont say if you d that ill like it, i probably won't, i dont like rape, or anything like that, but if it's well written.....

So Kimiko is Naraku's baby right? Does Miroku know?

Yes, that chapter was most definitely boring, as it the rest of your story. It might be good, but as there is no consistancy to it, and a lot of holes, it just doesn't make it. It completely lacks believability. First....women do not have morning sickness the day after they have sex, and it is not until the sixth week that any pregnancy test will show if a woman is pregnant or not. Additionally, if either Sango or Kagome were as badly beaten as you say, why was no medical treatment rendered? Sango could not have had sex with anyone that soon after being beaten and raped, with those kind of injuries. As well, it is more than obvious that you are completely unfamiliar with the need for a woman to recover from giving birth. In fact, it is neither safe, nor realistic to expect any woman who has just given birth to have sex the same day or even the same month afterwards. There is a need for time to heal not only from the birthing process, but also from the long term of having carried a child.

You have a reasonable plot, but you totally lack in any kind of story or plot development. Example: If Kagome was chatting with Inuyasha on her computer, and Naraku stated that he was just outside, why didn't you consider having her leave a quick message to Inuyasha that she had a stalker outside. Kagome is not that slow or stupid in the series, or manga.

hi peeps! great story huh? lol

Poor Naraku...He's a gorgeous Bishounen! Be nice to him!

Heh...Anyway: The third chapter wasn't bad either! Heh...I liked it!!

Heh...MELIKE! ^_^