schedule
February 3, 2006 at 12:00 AM
well if your going to continue with this story you could continue just like you have it now.
combining the past with the present and then you could do one chapter just explaining and showing how they first met and how they became lovers. you could also explain why sesshomaru is drawn to her in that chapter as well.
then you could make one chapter just with the present alone where kagome is trying to adapt to all of her memories and the demands of sesshomaru.
then you could continue and have just like you did in the first chapter combining the past and the present because that could be like kagome's lost memories coming back.
does sesshomaru really love and care about her or is she his slave for his passion?
well that's my opinion
hope that you continue with this story because the way you left it off could easily be picked up and continued and not from a sequel but just continue the story itsself.
you've got my interest and i'm totaly hooked on you story and will continue to post reviews to see if i can help you continue with you awesome story.
update soon
ja ne
combining the past with the present and then you could do one chapter just explaining and showing how they first met and how they became lovers. you could also explain why sesshomaru is drawn to her in that chapter as well.
then you could make one chapter just with the present alone where kagome is trying to adapt to all of her memories and the demands of sesshomaru.
then you could continue and have just like you did in the first chapter combining the past and the present because that could be like kagome's lost memories coming back.
does sesshomaru really love and care about her or is she his slave for his passion?
well that's my opinion
hope that you continue with this story because the way you left it off could easily be picked up and continued and not from a sequel but just continue the story itsself.
you've got my interest and i'm totaly hooked on you story and will continue to post reviews to see if i can help you continue with you awesome story.
update soon
ja ne
schedule
December 16, 2005 at 12:00 AM
My, my, my. What do we have here? Ah, a great story! I really liked it.
Take care and keep writing!
xxx-Kinnara
Take care and keep writing!
xxx-Kinnara
schedule
December 16, 2005 at 12:00 AM
I was captivated by the story with its disparate nature. I loved every word of this short story and am looking forward to reading more of your works. Thank you for keeping us all so entertained. You are quickly becoming one of my favorite authors. Happy writing!!!
schedule
December 13, 2005 at 12:00 AM
That was really cool, I love it just the way it is. Great Job!
schedule
December 7, 2005 at 12:00 AM
I think you did an amazing job intertwining the two threads, starting from the beginning with your summary when you metioned, "Nature loves opposites." GREAT line, by the way. Both parts were completely opposite in mood, one light, the other so much darker. And the balance was perfect. Just when the angst of the story was becoming overwhelming, you threw in a flashback to, well, lighten it! I thought this was truly well-written, your story and characters well-developed, and I hope you write more like it!