schedule
February 6, 2019 at 12:00 AM
Please update soon
schedule
October 17, 2009 at 12:00 AM
Hey B miss u
schedule
October 6, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Please update SOON! This is so good and I want to read more.
Please Hurry.
*LunaKageTenshi*
"I don't suffer from insainity,I enjoy every minute of it."
^.^
Please Hurry.
*LunaKageTenshi*
"I don't suffer from insainity,I enjoy every minute of it."
^.^
schedule
May 24, 2008 at 12:00 AM
I can't wait to read more it is the begining of a wonderful story
schedule
March 1, 2008 at 12:00 AM
huh
schedule
February 23, 2008 at 12:00 AM
I love the idea for this story and all, but you really seem to have no structure to your story I may not be the best writer here, but I have a better developed paragraph structure. My reccommendation is to find a beta. I would like to be your beta if you want. This story has been up here for a while i its illegible.
schedule
February 20, 2008 at 12:00 AM
it's very hard to read your story, the dialog is cramped together and the actions are not well defined. i would suggest to ave someone ( brother, sister, friend) proof read it and give you tips on how to better lay out your story. it's a much easer read if tings are niely spaced out.
Constructive critisisme, not insult. i really like your story, but please change the lay out of it so it's easer and maybe redo your other chaps at the same time. i'm sure you'll getmore readers and feedback by doing that.
Constructive critisisme, not insult. i really like your story, but please change the lay out of it so it's easer and maybe redo your other chaps at the same time. i'm sure you'll getmore readers and feedback by doing that.
schedule
February 19, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Please tell me that wasn't a serious attempt at writing. You're dialog was completely confusing. Who was saying what? It's all in one paragraph! Where did the diaper bag come from? She forgot about the baby until Sango mentioned it?
schedule
June 16, 2007 at 12:00 AM
Update soon!please
schedule
December 20, 2006 at 12:00 AM
ahhhh you gotta update soon you just gotta thing
were juststarting to get interesting i can't wait
to see what happens next
were juststarting to get interesting i can't wait
to see what happens next