AFF Fiction Portal

rate_review Reviews

for Stripper case

by kougas69angel

person A Reader
schedule May 5, 2005 at 12:00 AM
You need spacing. Thats one huge eye sore of a paragraph. Its otherwise not bad.

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Ex:

Blah blah blah blah

blah blah

blah blah blah
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It will do wonders
person AnjelRocker (not logged in)
schedule February 7, 2005 at 12:00 AM
Is it just me or does this story seem along like Hentai Jane's Lap Dance? Hmm?
person Two cats past midnight
schedule February 7, 2005 at 12:00 AM
I suggest you breaking up the giant paragraph into smaller paragraphs to make it better to read.